


Broken Mirror

by papillonoir



Category: X1 (Korea Band)
Genre: Abuse, Alternate Universe - High School, Angst, Dissociative Identity Disorder, Drama & Romance, F/M, Multiple Personalities, Psychological Drama, Romance, Seungseok bromance, Straight Wooseok, yocat rivalry
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-01-18
Updated: 2020-09-01
Packaged: 2021-02-27 04:09:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 21
Words: 152,519
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22300852
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/papillonoir/pseuds/papillonoir
Summary: He was different, he was ill. People thought he was weird. Before knowing him, Cha Jinhee was indifferent. She was an ordinary girl who just wanted to live the ideal, drama-free years of high school without having to mind other people's business. While secretly facing his hurdles of living alone with an abusive man, Kim Wooshin chose Cha Jinhee to discover him, entering her life as the most annoying, egoistic, narcissistic, mischievous chairmate she'd ever had. Things began to change when she found a completely different person – Kim Wooseok, a soft-hearted bullied nerd who couldn't stand up for himself – living in the very same body, which led her to a deep dive and discovery of not just two, but three, four, and more shattered personalities hidden inside him. How would things turn out if her heart also changed for the mentally ill boy?Follow Jinhee and Wooseok’s journey as she guided him to open up and learn about trust, friendship, rivalry – and even love.
Relationships: Kim Wooseok | Wooshin/Original Character(s)
Comments: 10
Kudos: 29





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first story on AO3 (came from Asianfanfics) and it's an X1 story. I started writing this a month before the D word, it just makes me sad sometimes to continue writing this lol but I'm trying to keep my hopes up for the boys! So I'll share this story here. If anyone discovers this, enjoy :)

* * *

There were too many rumors circulating in that high school. People seemed to love observing each other so much, coming up with their own _theories_ , sharing them to others with a little extra _spices_. Art wasn’t their only specialty, apparently. Cha Jinhee learned this fun fact quite early in her freshman year, which she found not so _fun_ after all, being one of the many topics people talked about. It was enough to limit her circle of friends – she’d rather not sit together with gossipers who would talk about her too when she wasn’t around, and thus she had grown unaware of the buzzes. She was more contented that way.

Even so, it might have been better if she had had the knowledge of some _important_ rumors that might possibly affect _at least_ one precious year in her life.

“I’ve seen the students list in your new class.”

The first morning in her sophomore year, Jinhee was accompanied by a particular senior boy; the student council president, to be exact. On his nametag was printed silver Korean letters of his name, _Han Seungwoo_. He was bubbly and cuddly, despite being so tall and having a strong intimidating aura when his broad smile wasn’t present. But that morning his smile was there, greeting his favorite girl whom he considered his own sister, who had grown up together with him and his actual sister for many sweet years.

“You’re in the same class as Yeonie again! You girls are destined to be together.” Seungwoo cuddled the younger girl as he laughed, not minding the eyes that had fallen on them.

“I know, right? It’s like the seventh time we’re in the same class since elementary school.” Chuckling, Jinhee squirmed off the older’s arms, her bright chocolate brown eyes flicking side to side scanning some unwanted stares. It wasn’t that she hated the display of affection; being the center of attention was what made her uncomfortable. She smoothed her navy blue uniform and fixed her long, lush wavy black hair as they walked together down a busy corridor. “Anyways, did Yeonwoo sleep in again?”

“She was still in the shower when I left,” Seungwoo giggled recalling his morning that had been loud and chaotic, thanks to his dear little sister. “Ah, it’s not that I didn’t want to wait! As the council president, I’ve got to show a good example to others. How do I show a good example, you may ask? One way is by coming early and escorting my princess to her class.”

“Ugh, stop it.” Jinhee suppressed her laugh and gave a playful punch on the boy’s arm. “This is why people think there’s something going on between us! They see you get clingy and say corny stuff to me. Stop that, I’m serious.”

“Corny? You consider my sweetness corny?” Seungwoo pretended to sulk, jutting out his bottom lip. He proceeded to tease her with his funny pouty face and whiny sounds, causing her to giggle and try to push his face away in a shy manner.

“Aish, they’re together again… How lucky.” Jinhee caught a mumble coming from a group of girls heading the opposite direction. She sighed and opted to ignore it. They had arrived outside her classroom anyway.

Not yet letting Jinhee in, Seungwoo poked his head into the room and managed to steal some attention. When he turned back to her, a restrained smile was plastered on his lips.

“What are you so worried about? I’m not a toddler on the first day of preschool, you know.” Jinhee chuckled and rolled her eyes. “Can I get in now?”

Seungwoo held the girl’s narrow shoulders and bent down a little, peering through his bangs to look into her round eyes. “Tell me if a boy messes with you, okay? I’ll make sure he won’t even come close the second time.” He pinched Jinhee’s cheeks and poked her nose, making her huff in embarrassment. Her new classmates didn’t even try to look oblivious and hide the curiosity in their prying eyes.

“Bye bye, Jinny! Have fun in class!” Seungwoo beamed and waved as he turned on his heels and jogged away to get back on his business.

“Bye bye, baby! Daddy loves you!” A mocking voice came from the back of the class, where a group of boys were sitting on their desks. One of them had strikingly bold and sharp features, a handsome face and a nice build that could easily snatch attention in a crowd. He hopped off his desk, blocked Jinhee’s way and pinched her cheeks, teasing her in a high-pitched voice mimicking Seungwoo’s. “Did a boy annoy my baby? Should I kick his ass? Should I kick his balls? Oh wait, it’s Lee Hangyul! Nevermind!”

Jinhee’s face crumpled as she swatted the boy’s hands away. “Cut it off!” She rubbed her cheeks, laughing and whining at the same time. “Gosh, I don’t need a second round. He’s always so clingy, you know? Even the juniors saw it. How embarrassing.”

Hangyul, her old classmate from the freshman year, moved aside and let her claim the empty seat by the window.

“I know, right? He’s embarrassing. So I wonder why he’s the popular one instead of me.” Hangyul shrugged and smirked smugly.

“I’m dying to know why,” Jinhee retorted. She dropped her bag in the empty seat next to her.

“Let me guess, this seat belongs to Han Yeonwoo.” Hangyul pointed at the said seat. “You girls are always together, I’m surprised you weren’t born conjoined twins. How could they put you both in the same class again?”

“How could they put _us_ in the same class again?” Jinhee pointed at herself and the boy, and stuck her tongue out at him, pulling a mocking face that made Hangyul snicker.

“You know this class is going to be fun if I’m in it.” Hangyul pointed his thumb to his group of friends at the back. “Come hang out with us when you feel like visiting the wretched, princess.”

As soon as Hangyul returned to his seat, Jinhee’s phone buzzed in the pocket of her blazer. She fished it out and found a new message notification from her bestie.

_“Jinny I’m running late!! Seungwoo oppa left me again_ _ㅠㅠ Save me a seat, will you? Will be there in ten minutes! Miss you_ _♡♡♡”_

Jinhee chuckled and shook her head. It was always the same story with the Han siblings; clingy Seungwoo and sleepyhead Yeonwoo.

_“No worries, best spot just for you_ _♡ come quick before someone steals it!”_ Jinhee replied.

Her ears twitched as she caught faint whispers from the girls two rows behind her. “Damn, we have that creep in our class. I heard he’s bi?”

“Bisexual??”

“No, no, I mean he’s bipolar.”

“Ah, really? I thought people said he had schizophrenia.”

_Sick rumors all the time._ Jinhee rolled her eyes. She shoved her phone back into her pocket, sighed, and leaned back into her seat as she flew her gaze out the window. She could see the front gate from there. No signs of Han Yeonwoo – she’d spot a girl running like a chicken on fire if she had come.

Instead of Yeonwoo, a particular boy walking through the gate caught Jinhee’s eyes. Her heart leaped and a bashful grin bloomed on her small face, carving dimples on her cheeks. The boy had such a manly aura erupting just from the way he walked, the way he held his backpack strap on his shoulder, and the way he waved and smiled at some students he knew. His toothy smile was the brightest, just as bright as the innocent glint in his eyes. He always styled his black hair a little different every day; that day it was parted on the side, his bangs curved a little, giving a peek of his forehead. Jinhee thought he couldn’t be more charming than that. But of course, the lovestruck girl had found herself thinking that way too many times.

_Good morning, Yohan._

She placed her hand on the window and watched until the boy entered the building, leaving her field of sight. She let out a dejected sigh.

_Right… We’re not classmates anymore._

“Look, he’s just standing there,” the girls at the back continued to whisper. “He’s blocking the door.”

Curious, Jinhee couldn’t help but tear her gaze off the window and take a look at the door. There was a boy standing there, a skinny one with a small, handsome yet cold face, his uniform shirt untucked and his backpack hanging loose on one shoulder. Brushing his thick black hair aside with his delicate, bony fingers, his beautiful big eyes took a quick scan across the classroom while his tongue glided across small, plump pinkish lips.

Naturally, Jinhee found him quite adorable – although not as much as she found her crush adorable. She wondered how there could be such sick rumors about him.

She didn’t have to wonder too much about it, because the answer then came to her at that instant. Once his sharp gaze fell on her, he left his spot and took bold steps in her direction until he stopped next to the seat that was supposed to be Yeonwoo’s. His presence felt much stronger and more intimidating when he was near. With all his overflowing confidence, he moved Jinhee’s bag down to the floor and claimed that seat without a word.

Jinhee’s round brown eyes widened at the unexpected bold action – and at the face that was even more handsome up close. She couldn’t admire it one bit, though. What would a handsome face mean without manners?

“Uh… Excuse me?” Jinhee furrowed her eyebrows at the boy. “I’ve tagged this seat for my friend, it’s occupied. Sorry, please find another seat.”

The boy’s dark, half-lidded cold eyes shifted to her in a lazy and unamused manner, yet one corner of his lips tugged up into a mischievous smile. “It’s mine now,” he said, his voice surprisingly deep and soft. Catching his new chairmate read the nametag on his blazer, he quickly added, “Wooshin. This tag is wrong.”

_Kim Wooseok_ , the nametag stated.

Jinhee’s mouth opened and closed in an unsuccessful attempt to summon a proper comeback. In the past seventeen years of her life, she had never come across a person with such an irking attitude.

“Hey dude, move.” Hangyul left his loud group of friends and came to the rescue. “You heard her, that seat is occupied.”

“By a bag?” Wooshin leaned back in his seat and crossed his arms over his chest. His gaze was strong and unwavering even though he was smaller than the boy towering over him. “No person sitting in it means it’s unoccupied. Mind your own business.”

Hangyul could easily catch the smaller boy in a headlock and choke him with his strong arms, but Jinhee knew well enough that the big boy was a softie inside who wouldn’t easily get triggered by mere words.

“Well, you’re in a girl’s personal bubble right there, and that girl is my friend, so it’s my business too,” Hangyul said calmly, with an intrigued smile. “Sorry, I can’t let you make her feel uncomfortable.”

Upon that statement, suddenly the uninvited boy turned and leaned closer to Jinhee, catching her off guard. He had a sly smile playing on his lips as he lowered his voice, asking, “Do I make you feel uncomfortable?”

“U-Um—Well, duh!” The girl nervously rolled her eyes and scooted back in her seat. He was too close for her liking. “Obviously.”

“See? Move, man.” Hangyul placed a hand on Wooshin’s shoulder. Jinhee thought her eyes could be wrong, but she saw the new guy’s pupils dilate at the touch. “These two seats behind you are empty too.”

Wooshin didn’t budge. Jinhee sighed. “You know what, I’ll move instead,” she said.

“No.” Wooshin snapped his head to her and narrowed his intense eyes. “Stay seated.”

“Jinny! I’m here!” The girl whom Jinhee had been waiting for finally arrived at the door. She looked exactly like the female version of Han Seungwoo, with medium-length dark brown hair, small eyes, high nose, thin lips, and of course that big smile from ear to ear – which slowly faltered once she stopped next to the seat that was supposed to be hers.

“He stole it,” Jinhee blurted before her best friend could start whining about her choosing to sit with a boy instead of with her.

“Who are you?” Han Yeonwoo frowned at the unfamiliar boy, who wouldn’t even bother looking back at her.

“He’s the asshole of the year,” Hangyul mumbled.

“Find an empty seat, I got here first. It’s your own fault for coming late,” Wooshin said nonchalantly.

“Tsk, fine, I’ll steal it back tomorrow.” Yeonwoo gave up easily and picked the seat right behind Jinhee.

“Look, twinkie, I’ll personally lift your butt and move you—” Hangyul’s sentence was cut off when the male homeroom teacher entered the classroom, followed by a tall clumsy-looking boy who also came late. Jinhee recognized him as Cho Seungyoun, a true social butterfly who seemed to know nearly everyone in their school, from the students to the guards. He once had accidentally hit her in the head with a soccer ball – that was how they had come to know each other.

“Hurry and pick a seat,” the teacher told Seungyoun.

“Yes, sir. I apologize once again for coming late.”

Since there were no empty seats left but the one next to Yeonwoo, that seat automatically became his. Jinhee didn’t even have the chance to move.

“Hi, hey there, hi.” Seungyoun whispered and flashed a sweet eye smile at some classmates who seemed happy to have him in the class. Lastly, he greeted the three around him – Yeonwoo, Jinhee, and Wooshin.

“Cha Jinhee, right? Ah, I’m sorry about that ball accident,” Seungyoun said after having a little introduction with his new chairmate, Yeonwoo, who seemed to be smitten with his friendly charm already.

“It’s really fine, you always apologize about that every time we meet.” Jinhee chuckled. 

“What kind of guy would hit a girl with a ball?” Wooshin mumbled, “So careless.”

_What’s with that toxic attitude?_ Jinhee frowned. _They don’t even know each other but he’s already scoffing like this._

“I kicked the ball too hard and it bounced off the goal.” Seungyoun smiled and rubbed his nape sheepishly, not even triggered one bit by the smaller boy’s sharp words.

Ignoring that explanation, once again Wooshin leaned closer to Jinhee and said under his breath, “If you have a guy like me around you, you won’t even get hurt.”

Jinhee’s face scrunched up in disgust from the cheesiness. As if he hadn’t had enough, the boy flashed a naughty wink as his sneaky hand took the audacity to hold her chin.

“Aish—!” Jinhee threw her hand over her own mouth after an irritated yell had slipped out, interrupting the teacher’s words.

“Yes, miss Cha Jinhee? Do you have something to say?” the teacher asked, looking somewhat pissed for being cut off.

“No, sir. I apologize.”

While Jinhee stood up and bowed, she noticed how Wooshin dropped his head and pressed his lips together holding back his naughty smile. With that, an unspoken cold war between them was declared.

As soon as the first break time came, Jinhee didn’t wait a second longer to drag Yeonwoo to the cafeteria, leaving her troublesome chairmate who had fallen asleep on his desk.

“What an ass! Coming uninvited just to give a bad mood. Just like bloody period.” Jinhee stomped her feet all the way, while her best friend winced apologetically at her tantrum.

“That’s… a slightly disturbing but totally accurate simile.” Yeonwoo nodded. “You know what, let’s ask Seungyoun to exchange seats with you. Or you could take my seat and I’ll take his seat if you wanna sit by the window. That Wooshin guy can glue his ass to his chair if he wants it. Screw him, right?”

“Right! Screw him. We shouldn’t let that jerk separate us!” Jinhee threw her arms around her giggly friend as they walked to the cafeteria.

“Noona!”

A pair of arms waved in the distance, at one of the tables. Jinhee recognized her little brother’s voice immediately.

“Ahh, right, Junho is a senior high student too now!” Yeonwoo beamed at the sight of the familiar smiley boy. “Ah, it’s so nice to see him here.”

The two girls stopped by at the table of six boys – three juniors and three sophomores, an unusual combination.

“Why are you sitting with this thug?” Jinhee asked her brother, half joking, pointing at Hangyul. Sitting on the big boy’s left and right were Seungyoun and Kim Yohan, his close friends from the school’s sports club.

Yes, _that_ Yohan, the one whom Jinhee had seen from the window that morning. He was well-known for being one of the key members of the taekwondo club. Despite having many females – from students to teachers – crushing on him, he wasn’t out of Jinhee’s reach after all; in fact, he had been in her group of hangout friends since the freshman year. It was just that she had tried her best to keep her feelings hidden, or even push them aside, because she knew better than to be after the big fish and deal with other girls around him. She didn’t need that kind of competition and drama in her high school years.

But still, could anyone control their crush on someone?

“Jinny Noona, Yeonwoo noona, sit here. These sunbaenims are really funny! I thought they could be part-time clowns.” Junho laughed. “Oh, and also! Meet my new friends, Song Hyeongjun and Lee Eunsang.”

The two innocent-looking junior boys next to Junho bowed and smiled politely as they shook hands with Jinhee and Yeonwoo. The latter couldn’t help but squeal at how adorable the boys were.

The eight of them ended up sitting and eating together, and eventually the atmosphere grew less playful when a certain topic was brought up.

“Wooshin… We’ve talked about him before, right?” Seungyoun asked Yohan and Hangyul. “Actually, people think he’s got a mental issue. But we can’t say for sure because we don’t really hang with him. He’s usually alone.”

“Yohan has spent some time with him before, though,” Hangyul said with a full mouth, unknowingly spitting a piece of rice out into Yohan’s food. “Yohan, you tell them. About that time in the library.”

“Ah, that.” Yohan swallowed down his food and took a few gulps of his drink before recalling his encounter with the said boy. “It was last year. I was researching for a homework in the library. When I got bored and leaned back to take a break, I saw him sitting alone in the corner. That time I had heard some weird stuff about him. But, at that moment, he looked more like a defenseless nerd instead of a rascal. He was wearing that round glasses, plus he also looked so small like he could fold his body up like a shirt. Trust me, you’ll feel the need to protect him if you see him like that! I got really curious about him. Since I needed to catch a break anyway, I went up to him and said hi. He got scared just from that greeting. I asked, ‘What’s your name?’ and he stammered so bad. He introduced himself as Kim Wooseok.”

“That’s the name on his nametag,” Jinhee said, “but he said it was the wrong name. That’s so weird.”

“It couldn’t be that he has a secret identical twin, right?” Yeonwoo suggested, which surprised the whole table.

“That could be.” Yohan’s puppy eyes widened. “Because the Kim Wooseok vibe is so different! He was shy and melancholic, reading poems and all. He could be a whole different person, though!”

“I never thought of that,” Seungyoun said, “but that’s actually possible. Two people taking turns to go to school.”

“Maybe his parents are poor and can’t afford school for two kids,” Junho mumbled to himself.

“If that’s the case then Kim Wooseok should go to school more often than Wooshin,” Hangyul said, “otherwise I’ll have to get that guy to join the taekwondo club, so it’ll be fine to beat him up.”

The other seven students laughed at his remark. The tough guy really tried not to break the school’s rules, solely because he didn’t want to disappoint his parents.

“I’ll try to befriend him and get to know him better,” Seungyoun said, being the social butterfly he was. “No matter what, he also needs a friend. Being alone all the time wouldn’t always feel nice. School is already tough, you know?”

The others nodded agreeing to the statement, especially the sophomores, who knew the struggles better.

“It’d be nice if your positive vibe could rub off on him,” Jinhee said, “because we’ll have him around for the next one year.”

“Don’t worry, just leave it to Cho Seungyoun!” Seungyoun puffed out his chest and smiled proudly.

Hearing a soft sigh next to her, Jinhee glanced aside and found a lovestruck smile playing on Yeonwoo’s lips.

_As always, so quick to get whipped._ She elbowed her best friend and chuckled.

But even Jinhee herself couldn’t hold back from admiring her own secret crush’s laugh.

“Bhahahahah!”

The break was nearly over when they returned to their classrooms. Jinhee was wondering why the seat next to her was still empty while most students were already back in their seats – and also secretly wondered if the boy had eaten anything. He had been asleep behind an upside-down book when she had left the classroom.

_Not that I care._ She pouted. _How dare he touch my face when we had just met._

Right when the bell went off, the said boy came in rushing through the door and quickly returned to his seat. He was then wearing a big pair of thin-rim round glasses, like the ones Yohan had described, which indeed made him look like a soft nerd. Unlike an hour before, his previously dark, half-lidded eyes were then open wide like a lost puppy. Jinhee, Yeonwoo, Seungyoun, and Hangyul watched him cautiously as he sat down without a word.

Suddenly he held his hand out towards Jinhee, who slapped it away immediately out of reflex, since he had had the audacity to touch her chin before. Yeonwoo gasped and Seungyoun raised his eyebrows comically at the unexpected reaction, while Hangyul cackled and clapped his hands at the back.

“I-I’m sorry—” Wooshin took his hand back and hid it between his skinny thighs. His head dropped avoiding eye contact with his chairmate, who was equally shocked by her own action.

“No, I’m sorry. That was rude. I overreacted. Just… Keep your hands to yourself, please,” Jinhee said.

“It’s alright, Jinhee. He was just about to offer a handshake,” Seungyoun said. “Is that fine with you?”

“Oh… Is that so? Sure.” As if the boy next to her was a dangerous unidentified species, Jinhee offered her hand out ever so hesitantly. It wasn’t less than ten seconds until it was finally taken into a weak grip for a brief, timid handshake.

“I’m really sorry,” he said again, looking down.

“Kim Wooseok?” Seungyoun called. The smaller boy in front of him turned his head hearing his name being called, like there was nothing wrong and it was indeed his name. The other three exchanged a meaningful look.

_Maybe this is the other twin?_

“So, we can call you Wooseok, right?” Seungyoun asked again for a confirmation, to which he was answered with a shy nod.

“Yes, that’s my name. N-Nice… Nice to meet you guys.” Wooseok pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and fidgeted with his fingers. Yohan was right, they suddenly felt the need to protect him.

Their plan to switch seats was quick to be forgotten.

“Wooseok, have you eaten anything?” Yeonwoo asked.

Wooseok shook his head. “No, but I’m not hungry. It’s fine.”

“What are you saying? You’ll be even smaller if you don’t eat!” Seungyoun grabbed a pack of bread out of his bag. “Hurry and eat this before the teacher comes!”

“No, it’s okay, really, thank you… I’m fine, it’s okay.” Wooseok kept bowing and rejecting the food until Seungyoun ripped a big chunk of his bread and forced it into Wooseok’s small mouth.

“There, eat it! It has touched your mouth, you can’t return it, hurry and eat it! Look, teacher’s coming!” Seungyoun’s loud voice made the poor boy panic and push the rest of the bread into his cheeks, making himself look like a squirrel. Jinhee couldn’t help but laugh at that adorable face.

“Chew slowly, you’re going to choke! Calm down, the teacher isn’t here yet,” Jinhee said. She grabbed her own water bottle and handed it to him. The small boy coughed a little before chugging down some water to clear his throat, making sure not to touch the bottle with his lips.

“Good boy, good boy.” Seungyoun laughed and patted Wooseok’s shoulders from behind. “It’s good, isn’t it? It’s my mom’s homemade bread.”

“Seungyoun, you’re too nice,” a female classmate said, “you even want to be friends with that weird creep?”

“Hey, watch your mouth,” Yeonwoo snapped. She had her brother’s charisma when she got pissed. “Why would you put that kind of label on him when you don’t even know him personally?”

The other girl was taken aback. Who would have expected that there would be someone willing to defend the loner?

For a brief second, Seungyoun gave a proud smile to Yeonwoo before adding with a chuckle, “People are more than they seem to be. You’ll see more nice things if you’re also nice to people. At least that’s what I experience.”

Seungyoun was about to offer the rest of his bread when the teacher walked in. “Next break it is,” he said with a happy smile. The whole making friend thing was running more smoothly than he had expected.

On the other hand, Jinhee felt as if her heart was squeezed and twisted seeing how hard Wooseok was struggling to blink back his tears. The tip of his nose and his ears were flushed red just from their defense and little act of kindness.

_Seungyoun is right… No matter what, he also needs a friend._

She was quick to forget Wooshin’s asshole behavior. Learning the fact that there were two different versions of her chairmate had intrigued her full interest and curiosity; it was like a new mystery, a case for her to solve and find an answer to. She couldn’t wait to find out the truth about the boy.

_Boy… or boys?_

* * *

Jinhee was in dilemma.

_Should I ask? Or should I not?_

The long-haired girl in a navy blue uniform stood several meters away from a bus stop, flicking her fingers – a habit she did whenever she was nervous. After parting ways with Yeonwoo, she had decided to stop by a bookstore, and by chance ran into none other than the boy who had made her first sophomore day quite interesting.

Kim Wooseok was standing alone at the bus stop, waiting for his ride home.

Jinhee had been holding in the urge to blurt out a question about the twins theory, and what would happen if she used that chance now?

_No, I’ll prolly scare him off. It’s his privacy._

“Hey, Wooseok!” She still went up to him anyway.

Jinhee’s bright toothy smile faltered slightly noticing the sly smile and the cold eyes that weren’t covered by round glasses anymore.

_Oh, man… Did I greet the wrong Woo?_ Jinhee mentally facepalmed.

“It’s Wooshin.” The boy smirked. “Did you follow me all the way here?”

“Huh?” Jinhee cocked an eyebrow, her smile completely gone with the wind. “Excuse me? I’ve just left the bookstore over there. Why would I follow you?”

“That bookstore?” Wooshin’s eyes smiled at the building Jinhee was pointing at. “Nice coincidence, I also went there earlier. Or… Is it really a coincidence?”

“What are you trying to say?” Jinhee sighed and rolled her eyes. “Aren’t you kinda full of yourself?”

“Am I?” Wooshin chuckled. “It’s better to be confident than to be a timid turtle who can’t even lift his chin.”

_Is he talking about Wooseok?_ Jinhee wondered.

“Well, I would rather keep a sweet turtle than a cunning fox.” The shorter crossed her arms and averted her gaze away, snorting. “A turtle would neither trick nor hurt you like a fox would.”

Wooshin’s deep little laugh somehow sounded both belittling and affectionate. “You’re naïve.”

“You’re annoying. Your brother is nicer.” Jinhee gasped and covered her mouth as soon as she realized what she had just blurted out.

_I’m not even a hundred percent sure yet that they’re twin brothers!_

Wooshin cocked an eyebrow and tilted his head to the side, making a face that looked like he had just heard the most ridiculous thing in the world.

“Brother?” The slender boy bent forward slightly to meet Jinhee’s eye level. His mischievous smile was back on his plump lips. “I have no siblings. A person like me is only one, even in my family. The one and only Kim Wooshin. That’s why… Don’t wander off too far away, you won’t find another one like me.”

Jinhee felt like smacking that intimidatingly handsome face away like a volleyball, but his statement about having no siblings got her mind to stop working.

So, their _secret twins_ theory was wrong.

_But… how could there be two completely different versions of him?? This guy can’t be the same person as the one choking on Seungyoun’s bread and nearly crying earlier! Is it… really a mental issue…?_

“Jinny, huh?” Wooshin said, staring into the distance. “I heard the student council president call you that.”

“Yeah…?” Jinhee shrugged, absentminded. Her mind was too busy trying to figure out a way to find the truth.

“Are you close?” The other’s next question came out cold, but definitely curious. He was still avoiding eye contact.

“Hmm… You can say so. I mean, I grew up together with him and his sister. So, yeah, he’s like my own brother.”

Jinhee’s round eyes then lit up as soon as she got an idea. _That’s it! I could ask about that to see if they’re the same person!_

“Hey, Wooshin, was the bread good? The one Seungyoun gave you,” Jinhee asked with anticipation.

At last, Wooshin’s sharp gaze was then back on Jinhee. He didn’t say a word for a whole minute as he eyed every little feature of her small face, which looked like a deer caught in a spotlight.

“…Sure, baby fox. It was sweet.” When he leaned in and brought his lips closer to her ear, Jinhee felt delicate fingers one by one wrapping around her wrist – almost in a seductive way. His warm breath blew into her ear and sent chill all over her body as he whispered with a naughty smile, “But its sweetness is nothing close to yours. Thanks for the water.”

_Water… My water bottle that I gave him? They—They’re really the same person!_

Jinhee froze like an ice statue and her feet were pinned to the ground, even when the bus had come and Wooshin had entered the door.

“You gonna stand there all day?” Wooshin chuckled, waiting at the bus’ door.

“Um—I think I forgot something. At the bookstore.” The flabbergasted girl pointed her thumb at the said store.

“Fine then. See ya, baby fox.” Wooshin fixed the strap sliding off his shoulder, flashing a small smile and a wink before disappearing into the bus.

Jinhee didn’t lie. She spun on her heels and ran back to the bookstore, right away aiming for the psychology section.

She grabbed a particular book after a quick scan through the racks. “There you are.”

_Dissociative Identity Disorder._

* * *

“Dissociative Identity Disorder, or previously known as Multiple Personality Disorder, is a mental disorder characterized by at least two or more distinct personality identities. Each personality or alters may have its own name, characteristics, postures, gestures, and distinct way of talking. It is likely to be caused by many factors, including severe trauma during childhood such as extreme, physical, sexual, or emotional abuse. This disorder is thought to be a coping mechanism, as a way to help the person avoid bad memories. The switching between personalities can take seconds to minutes to days.”

“Woah! I thought it only happened in movies!” Yeonwoo gawked at the explanation that Jinhee was reading from her book. After returning from the store, Jinhee had called her for an emergency meeting in her room.

“So, trauma… What could have happened to him?” Yeonwoo thought out loud.

“Probably abused by an adult? Or maybe because of bullying? You know… the Wooseok version still acts like a bullied kid.” Jinhee sighed. After digging deeper into the potential cause of his personality inconsitency, she could only feel sorry for the boy.

“Look, the book says one of the signs is amnesia,” Yeonwoo pointed at a passage in the book. “’Failure to recall extensive personal information. Can also be micro-amnesia where he can’t remember discussions or conversations.’ He remembered the bread, though. Maybe that will happen sometimes?”

“If that ever happens, I hope he won’t just forget all the crap he does.” Jinhee muttered, and then suddenly let out a horrified gasp. “Wait. Two or more... What if there are more than two personalities??”

The two gawked at each other. “Oh no… I once watched a movie about this, a-and one of the personalities was a m-murderous man!” Yeonwoo said, clutching her head. “The bullied kid is going to take revenge, he’s going to kill all of us!”

“Waaaaah!” They cried out loud and held each other.

“Why are you saying that nonsense?! You’re making me scared of him!” Jinhee whined.

“It’s possible, we gotta anticipate! Should we wear a bulletproof vest under our uniforms from tomorrow on?” Yeonwoo’s face contorted in agitation, not even joking with the suggestion.

“Aish, that’s ridiculous, he’s not going to kill us!” Jinhee pushed her best friend away like a bad thought she had to get rid of. “We just… We just need to be extra nice to him.”

“Even to Wooshin?”

Jinhee didn’t like it at all; the idea of being nice and letting the bratty rascal do whatever he wanted to them. He _had_ to be put in his place. But, were they ready to risk their lives for that?

“Yeah… Even to Wooshin.”


	2. Chapter 2

* * *

“You know what, screw it! Screw being nice to Wooshin!”

Jinhee yelled at the top of her lungs releasing her pent up anger.

“But—”

“If that moron tries to kill any of us, I’ll make sure to finish him first.” Jinhee gritted her teeth.

“Whoa, okay, you don’t mean that.” Seungyoun slipped through the two girls and stopped in front of them. “First of all, calm down. Breathe, yes, that’s right. No one’s killing anyone, we’re all underaged high school students, remember? It’s our duty to study well for South Korea’s brighter future.”

“Tell that to his perverted ass, because he’s gonna make it a dark future for sure.” Jinhee scowled, her face and ears fuming red. She had taken off her blazer and tied it around her waist instead, as a shield to hide the big red stain on the back of her skirt.

In the first three weeks of their sophomore year, Wooshin had been constantly teasing Jinhee in all sorts of ways he could think of, from being flirty even at the wrong times to doing childish pranks like hiding her uniform after P.E. class. She had been coping up with him pretty well – both because of Wooseok, the soft version of him, and also the terrifying thought of getting hurt by a potential hidden murderous version of him.

But what had Wooshin done this time to make her _that_ angry?

_Four hours ago…_

The art class had fallen silent. Everyone each had a piece of canvas in front of them and a brush in their hand, all focus locked on the various kinds of fruits neatly arranged on a table in the middle of the room.

However, one particular student seemed to be anxious and unable to focus for some reason.

Jinhee, who was returning to her seat after taking a closer look of the fruits, had suddenly frozen with eyes wide like a doll.

_Oh, no. What was that just now? Is it…? I can’t be having my period now, why is it coming so suddenly??_

She was about to sit down when out of nowhere a hand came landing on her butt with a dull smacking sound, making her yelp and jump in surprise. Her own hand flew by reflex to the spot where she had gotten hit, coming in contact with something wet and slippery – her palm was then coated in red paint. Some gasps could be heard here and there.

A bright shade of red took over Jinhee’s face and ears as her cold murderous gaze slowly shifted to the culprit.

“Wow, did a cherry bomb explode in there?”

_Slap!_

“IDIOT!!”

With a powerful swing, the palm-shaped red paint was then transferred to Wooshin’s left cheek. But a smug smirk was fast to replace the shock on his face.

“Oh my, what’s that commotion over there? Please, kids. We are not having a drama class right now,” the young male teacher said from his desk at the front. In a sassy manner he pointed his slender index finger towards the door. “Do finish your drama outside and come back later. Please, go.”

Jinhee didn’t need to think twice before fleeing the classroom to save herself from further embarrassment, while Wooshin rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue before lazily shuffling his way out.

“Sir, I volunteer to help them finish their drama!” Yeonwoo stood up and raised her arm like a soldier.

“And what role do you have? The third person in the relationship?” The teacher sighed in annoyance. “Ten minutes, no loud noises. Go.”

Even until Yeonwoo was done helping Jinhee try to clean her skirt from both blood and paint – which wasn’t really successful – Wooshin was nowhere to be seen. He had disappeared quickly like a sneaky fox, and remained missing until the very end of school hours, even when most students were heading out the school building – including Jinhee, Yeonwoo, and Seungyoun.

It was probably the best thing for him to do at that moment, because Jinhee’s urge to choke him to death was unbearable.

“Well… I don’t really know much about period, but can I say what I think? About what he did,” Seungyoun said, rubbing his nape uneasily as they were walking towards the school gate.

“What do you think?” Jinhee rolled her eyes. _Is he gonna defend that pervert now?_ She thought.

“Ah, you see… By saying ‘a cherry bomb exploded’, most likely he saw that… um, that red mark on your skirt, right?” Seungyoun’s face twisted, afraid to say the wrong words. “Maybe, just maybe, he used the red paint to cover the red mark? You know… Since it’s the same color.”

“And then he announced it to the whole class.” Jinhee rolled her eyes again for the umpteenth time.

“I know, right? He could have kept quiet about it! People weren’t watching anyway,” Yeonwoo fumed along. “He could have told Jinhee secretly instead of slapping her butt. What the hell?”

“That’s… Right.” Seungyoun gave up. “That’s Wooshin for you.”

“Where did he go anyway? He skipped the rest of the classes,” Yeonwoo said, “trouble is waiting for him tomorrow.”

Even though she was still pissed out of her mind, Jinhee couldn’t help but worry when she remembered that Wooshin had a fragile version of him.

_What if Wooseok got into trouble?_

“You know,” Seungyoun said again, “it’s been almost three weeks and we’ve only seen two alters of him, Wooseok and Wooshin. I don’t think he has a murderous personality. But I wonder if those two alters are fully aware of each other’s existence. It must be frustrating and confusing even to himself.”

“I’ve also been wondering about that. He never mentions anything about his disorder,” Jinhee said. “Do you guys think it’d be okay if we start that topic first? Maybe when he’s on Wooseok mode. The angel mode, not satan mode.”

“Eventually we’ll have to talk about that if we want to be friends with him.” Seungyoun shrugged. “He gotta feel safe around us.”

Yeonwoo stopped abruptly and held the other two by their wrists. “Look, it’s him!”

The three of them tensed up in alarm seeing the person of their main topic, fast-walking from the gate towards their direction. His hair and uniform were messy. His face no longer had red paint on it, but the stain was left on his white collar – some paint had dripped off his cheek. His wide puppy eyes looked scared and lost. It was unusual to see those eyes without the round glasses.

“He’s walking like a jittery nerd. It’s Wooseok mode,” Yeonwoo announced. They let themselves loosen up a bit.

“Wooseok!” Seungyoun called. “Where have you been? School is over already.” He said the obvious, pointing at the dark sky.

When Wooseok stopped in front of the other three, they noticed his lips trembling and his body shivering slightly. “I-Is my bag still inside?” He stammered.

“Yeah, we didn’t bring it with us, because we thought we might not meet you on our way.” Seungyoun gave a guilty look. “Come, I’ll go inside with you!’

“Yeonwoo and I will go too,” Jinhee said, much to Yeonwoo and Seungyoun’s surprise. “But I want to ask… Do you remember what happened earlier?”

From how Wooseok’s eyes grew even wider, and how he tried to analyze the trio’s faces in panic, it was clear that he had no memory of the most embarrassing moment in Jinhee’s life that was caused by him.

“It… It m-must be something bad…?” he said, looking at the blazer wrapped around Jinhee’s waist.

Jinhee felt like crumbling down.

But before she could do so, Wooseok was the first to drop onto his knees and bow until his forehead touched the ground, shocking the other three teenagers.

“I’m so sorry, for whatever I did, I’m so sorry.”

He got up quickly and ran as fast as he could into the school building.

It wouldn’t be strange if Seungyoun ran after him. It was expected of him to be the first to act when someone crumbled. But this time, catching a glimpse of glimmering tears roll down Wooseok’s cheeks, something snapped – it was as if Jinhee’s feet got their own life and decided to carry her fast to chase the boy. She ran after him, followed by Yeonwoo and Seungyoun, with tears welling up in her own eyes for an unknown reason.

Was it guilt? Or pity? Or empathy? Whatever it was, she believed Wooseok didn’t deserve to get hurt in this.

“Wooseok! Wait!” Jinhee yelled while running up the stairs. “Damn it, what do you eat to be that fast?”

“Jinhee, we’ll come from the other side!” Seungyoun’s loud voice echoed from one floor below. So, that was the emergency plan; they were going to trap the deer in the middle.

Jinhee was starting to lose her breath when she saw Wooseok run out of their classroom with his backpack. Fortunately, at the end of the corridor, Seungyoun and Yeonwoo showed up right on time. Wooseok turned on his heels just to find Jinhee at the other end.

He was trapped. Giving up, slowly he moved closer to the wall and slid down to the floor.

“Don’t hurt me. Please.” He pulled his knees up to his chest and cried into his folded arms. “I’m sorry.”

The scene sent a loud pang in their chests. Jinhee rushed over to him first and knelt by his side.

“Don’t cry, we’re not going to hurt you. It’s okay. Don’t apologize, it’s not your fault,” Jinhee whispered, trying to calm the boy down with soothing strokes on his back, not aware of how he had tensed up because of that sudden contact.

On the other side, Seungyoun had held Yeonwoo from coming closer to the other two. “Let’s wait for a moment, it’s a problem between them that they need to solve on their own. Some things may change if they can pass this,” he whispered.

“Wooseok.” Jinhee tried to be as gentle as she could when she attempted to make the boy lift his chin. “Everything’s fine now. Where did you go?”

Wooseok wiped his teary eyes with his wrists and shook his head. “I can’t,” he croaked, “I can’t remember how I ended up there. I woke up out there, in an alley. T-There was a broken bottle. I don’t know h-how I got out and escaped school. I… I always get in trouble, but I can’t remember how. They call me Wooshin and get angry at me for what he did. I’m scared…” He sobbed. “I’m scared.”

So, at least Wooseok was aware of Wooshin’s presence. At this point, Jinhee had no clue what to do. It was such a complicated case that went beyond her knowledge. All she knew was that Wooseok needed serious help from a psychiatrist, but that solution couldn’t be done right at that moment. She looked at Seungyoun to get some help, and he gave her some – he did a hugging motion with his arms and gave an assuring nod.

After contemplating for a whole minute in suffocating silence that was filled only with Wooseok’s sobs, Jinhee decided to give in and took Wooseok in her embrace. The boy’s shoulders trembled harder from the unexpected gesture. While hugging him, Jinhee mirrored the instructions Seungyoun did to the empty air; holding Wooseok’s head on her shoulder, caressing his hair, wiping his tears away. Seungyoun and Yeonwoo had a satisfied grin plastered on their faces as Wooseok eventually grew calmer and more comfortable with the soothing touch.

Each passing second, Jinhee’s way of seeing things began to change; she felt much more at ease by letting go of all that Wooshin had done to test her patience in the past three weeks. Learning to show affection did it better than holding onto her anger.

It was all new, and Jinhee had no words to say, but she managed to stop Wooseok’s tears. It was like an accomplishment that made her feel he like a proud mother after calming down her baby.

“Should we go home now?” Jinhee asked. Wooseok answered with a sleepy nod.

The silence was suddenly broken when Yeonwoo’s ringtone screamed, shocking the life out of all four of them.

_I CAN TAKE YOU HIIIIIGHER!_

“Geez, lower your ringtone volume!” Jinhee groaned and clutched her chest. Wooseok also held his own and panted quietly after the shock.

“Sorry, sorry!” Yeonwoo moved a few steps away and answered the call. “Yes, Seungwoo oppa!”

This time, Jinhee could feel Wooseok twitch and freeze right after the mention of Seungwoo’s name.

_Huh…? Is it not related, or does he have anything to do with Seungwoo oppa?_ She wondered.

“Fine, I’ll go there in a bit. No, no need to come here! No, oppa, stop that. I’m not a princess. No, stop being dramatic. Just—Just wait there, okay? I’m going home with you.”

Despite being embarrassed, Yeonwoo had a loving smile hearing her brother’s warm voice. Wooseok watched her secretly from the corner of his eye, not lifting his head off Jinhee’s shoulder.

“Hey, are you okay?” Jinhee whispered.

“Hm? Mhmm.” Wooseok pulled away and rubbed his nape shyly when Yeonwoo ended the call. “Th-Thank you. That was embarrassing… I shouldn’t have cried that much.”

“It’s not wrong to cry that much, though.” Jinhee gave a warm smile, showing off her dimples that made Wooseok lower his head to hide his own shy smile.

“Are you leaving now?” Seungyoun asked Yeonwoo. “Should I walk you to the gate, princess?”

“Aish, don’t talk like my brother.” Yeonwoo chuckled and hit Seungyoun’s arm playfully. A hint of pink bloomed on the fair skin of her cheeks. “Stay here with Jinhee and Wooseok. They could use some help from the happy virus right now.”

After Yeonwoo had waved goodbye and left the scene, Seungyoun let himself come closer to the other two, helped them get up on their feet, and pulled Wooseok into a hug. He looked and felt so small in his arms.

“Where do you live? I’ll walk you home,” Seungyoun said, not letting go of the dumbfounded boy.

“I-I-I can go home by myself, i-it’s fine,” Wooseok stammered. He had turned as rigid and straight as a chopstick. It was clear as the sky that he wasn’t used to hugs, especially one from a boy.

“Jinhee, are you coming too?” Seungyoun ignored Wooseok’s objection.

“Of course.” The girl beamed. “No way we’re letting you go alone.”

And besides, they might find some useful information if they went to the place where he lived.

How surprised Jinhee was when they found out that his place was only five-minute walk away from hers.

“Ahh, so that’s why you took the same bus.” Jinhee recalled her encounter with Wooshin at the bus stop near the bookstore. “Look, that’s my house! The white one with a brown gate. It’s really close, right?”

Wooseok’s small lips parted as he stared at the said house, a pretty big one, around the same size as all the other houses around it.

“Third one on the left,” he mumbled unconsciously, but the other two heard it.

“He’s memorizing its location!” Seungyoun cackled.

“Ah, n-no! It’s not like that!” Wooseok waved his hands and tried to explain in panic, making the others laugh even more.

“Wooseok can pay a visit if Wooseok wants.” Jinhee grinned. Wooseok’s jumble of words faltered into silence all at once.

“…I can?”

“Mhmm!”

Despite not being said out loud, it was understood by both boys why Jinhee said Wooseok’s name in third person instead of _“you”._

Wooseok could come, but Wooshin should _not_.

Five minutes later, the trio stopped in front of a house somewhat bigger than Jinhee’s, with a modern, futuristic exterior that made it stand out among the houses in the block. The walls were painted in white and the tall gate in grey.

“Woah, what a nice house.” Seungyoun’s mouth fell open in awe. “It looks different from the other houses. Is any of your parents an architect?”

“My uncle is.” Wooseok rubbed his nape and lowered his head. “My parents live in Daejeon. This is my uncle’s house.”

“Eh?” Jinhee and Seungyoun snapped their heads towards the boy in the middle. “You don’t live with your parents? How long has it been?” Jinhee asked.

“About eight years… Since I was nine. I used to meet my parents once every three or four months, but now it’s been a year I haven’t met them.”

_Now, it’s not so surprising that he’s mentally unstable_ , Jinhee thought in pity.

“Are you at least happy to live with your uncle?” Seungyoun asked.

Wooseok didn’t answer right away. His lips were smiling, but his gaze on the house was empty.

“…Things keep changing. I’ve been happier before, but I’ve also been sadder.” He cleared his throat and turned around facing the other two, who were slowly entering his personal life – not that it was a completely awful thing to him, it seemed.

“Thank you,” he said with a sincere smile. “I’ll get in now… Before he comes out first.”

Jinhee and Seungyoun exchanged a meaningful look.

“Ah… It was nice walking and talking with you,” Seungyoun said. “See you tomorrow then?”

The boys shared a quick bro hug, but Jinhee held herself back, feeling like they had had enough skinship for the day. In exchange, she flashed her sweetest smile along with a little wave goodbye.

“See you, Wooseok. Rest well.”

“Y-You too, Jinhee.”

The pretty-faced boy was quick to disappear behind the tall gate, with his hands cupping his flushed cheeks.

“What do you think?” Seungyoun asked Jinhee once Wooseok was out of sight.

“I think… his uncle might have something to do with his mental condition, since he grew up with him.” Jinhee stated her new theory. “What do you think?”

Seungyoun shifted his gaze from the house towards the oblivious girl next to him. The smile that slowly bloomed on his face somehow made Jinhee’s skin crawl.

“What do I think? Well… I think he likes you.”

* * *

“Congratulations!”

A table of eight students was filled with cheers and applause. Two of them stood up and bowed in gratitude at the rest, both had their arms around each other’s shoulders.

“Ah, once again our tigers won a competition, it’s about time they become national taekwondo athletes!” Seungyoun faked a proud sob and wiped his nonexistent tears away.

“That time will come soon for sure.” Hangyul patted his own chest proudly and shared a fist bump with Yohan.

“In order to make it come faster, please do treat us to some nice food.” Junho’s innocent remark earned him a smack on the shoulder from his sister and laughter from the rest of the table.

“I agree!” Seungyoun and Yeonwoo exclaimed in unison.

“What kind of junior are you, Cha Junho?” Hangyul chuckled. “Nah, just kidding. We’ve planned that before, it’s just that we haven’t decided what to buy for you guys.”

“It shouldn’t be something too expensive,” Eunsang said. “Hangyul hyung and Yohan hyung shouldn’t spend their pocket money on us.”

“You’re my favorite.” Hangyul pointed at Eunsang and winked.

“It’s really fine, we want to celebrate with you guys. We won a big one this time.” Yohan flashed a sweet smile after sitting down. “Do you have any suggestions?”

“How about ice cream, hyung?” Hyeongjun perked up. “The new shop we went to last week, the ice cream and the waffle were really good! We can go together after school.”

“Oh, ice cream! Great idea!” Seungyoun clapped his hands like a happy seal and ruffled Hyeongjun’s curly hair.

“Are the others okay with it? Ice cream after school today?” Yohan asked, flying his gaze around until it stopped at the girl sitting in front of him, across the table. His twinkling eyes and his plump lips that stretched into a soft smile got her to bow her head like a shy kitten.

“I-I’m good, ice cream sounds great.” Jinhee forced herself to lift her chin and give a shy smile in return.

_Ugh, pull yourself together, Cha Jinhee. This isn’t how we do._

“Great.” Yohan’s smile turned into a big toothy grin. “Then, remember not to go home right away, you guys! If you go home then you’ll miss the fun.”

When the break time was ending and everyone was heading back to their classes, Jinhee noticed how Yeonwoo had sunk into yet another fun conversation with Seungyoun, and how the juniors were busy joking among themselves. There were only Hangyul and Yohan who remained quiet, walking behind her, occassionally smiling at people who congratulated them along the way. She began to feel jittery for some reasons.

“Hey, Jinhee.” Hangyul tapped her shoulder from behind. “I haven’t spent that much time with three of you. How’s it going with your chairmate?”

“O-Oh, Kim Wooseok?” Jinhee cracked an awkward laugh, not even turning her head around to see Hangyul. The presence of the boy walking next to him was getting too _strong_ for her. “You know, still the same. Nothing special.”

“I’ve heard of what happened.” Yohan chirped in. “Did you guys really manage to befriend him after that day? I’m glad it turned out nicely even though he did something bad. Jinhee, you were awesome for forgiving him just like that.”

“Ah.” Another awkward laugh. “It’s just that... I realized it wasn’t something he could control all the time. Sometimes he loses himself, I had to understand that. Pushing him away and locking him out wouldn’t solve anything.”

“She’s too nice, isn’t she?” Hangyul asked the other boy.

Yohan shoved his hands into his pockets and smiled at the nervous girl’s back. “It’s true, though. What she said. I realized the same thing after getting to know a little about that guy.”

This time, Jinhee turned her head back – just a _little_ – out of curiosity. “Have you… talked to him again since that time at the library?”

“A couple times, yeah.” Yohan shrugged. “We ran into each other and had a small talk, but because both times I was in hurry, it was more like catching up with each other in a rush. I’ve only talked to Wooseok. It’d be great if I could interact with Wooshin too.”

An image of Wooshin kicking Seungyoun in the crotch during P.E. class earlier that day flashed in Jinhee’s mind. “Nope, it wouldn’t be _that_ great. That little troublemaker has his own way of getting comfortable with a friend. You won’t like his way.”

“Really?” Yohan chuckled. “Now I’m more curious.”

“Seungyoun is soft, he just laughs it off when the brat hits him,” Hangyul said. “But Yohan is different, you know? Not that he’d kick his ass back or such. I just have a feeling that Wooshin wouldn’t get physical with our taekwondo master.”

“What are you saying? You’re the taekwondo master!” Yohan laughed and elbowed his friend.

_Yeah, he’s different._ Jinhee quietly agreed. _It could be his bold aura, or his charismatic charm, or whatever it is… Ah, stop it, Cha Jinhee. Don’t start admiring him too much! Aish… What’s with me lately? My brain must be broken after dealing with Wooshin’s nonsense._

No matter how much Jinhee tried to deny it, it was still obvious that she was anticipating the end of the school hours.

“Hey, stop looking at the clock,” Yeonwoo whispered and giggled behind her, fifteen minutes before the bell.

“I’m not,” Jinhee muttered as she took another glance at the clock.

“Date after school?”

Jinhee’s gaze flicked to the boy next to her, who was side-eyeing her with his arms crossed over his chest.

“No.” Jinhee gave a short reply. She didn’t need Wooshin to join the teasing too.

“Then… A step towards a date.” The boy corrected himself.

Jinhee turned her whole body facing her chairmate and shot him a very forced smile. “No, Wooshin, it is not.”

The corner of Wooshin’s pouty lips raised into a small smirk. He looked away and sighed. “Whatever.”

As soon as the class was dismissed, the group of four – Jinhee, Yeonwoo, Seungyoun, and Hangyul – went straight to Yohan’s class and then the three juniors’, and off they went to the dessert shop down the street. The atmosphere was warm and bubbly, and their laughter didn’t stop along the way – thanks to Seungyoun and Hangyul, the clowns of the grup.

“Gosh, my stomach hurts.” Jinhee laughed, tearing up from too much laughing.

“It’s fun, isn’t it?” Yohan’s giggle that sounded so close next to her sent a funny fuzzy feeling in her chest, making her grin from ear to ear. “I’m glad we all can go out together.”

“Mhmm!” Jinhee nodded and flashed a smile at the taller, showing off her dimples. Her heart began to thump louder as the next three seconds passed by with their smiling eyes on each other, until she broke the contact first and let her gaze fall to her feet.

_That… That was a bit too long just now._ She let out a shaky sigh.

“Here we are!” Yohan said as they stopped in front of a shop with a big white neon sign, “ _FLASH Dessert_ s _”._ A bright K-pop song, “Pretty Girl” by a new boy group called Crayon, could be heard faintly from the outside. Through the transparent glass walls, they could see blue, green, and yellow neon lights in various fun shapes inside – ice cream, fruits and sweets, cute animals, and such. There were also statues of the shop’s adorable mascots – a fox, a bunny, and a butterfly. It was a big shop that had two parts with different themes; the right side was like the night mode with black walls and floor, and the left side was the day mode, dominated by white color. Since it had just opened a week before, the place was quite packed with people, who mostly were students from the same school. Luckily the group managed to put some seats together for all eight of them, on the left side of the shop.

“You guys can go and order first, I’ll be the babysitter. As usual.” Hangyul pointed his thumb at the three juniors, who were busy taking a video of the place to be posted on their social media.

And so, the rest four of them went to join the line.

“Wow, they even have their own flavors,” Jinhee said, when their turn to order was about to come. “What’s that? _I Can Take You High_ ice cream? Does it contain alcohol?”

“That one looks suspicious. It’s called _Fire Up…_ It must be spicy!” Yeonwoo pointed at the said reddish orange ice cream.

“Ohh, I want to try that one!” Seungyoun laughed and bounced on his heels excitedly.

“Are you sure? It’s really a spicy ice cream!” Yohan cackled and applauded his friend after getting a nod and a big grin as the answer. “I’d rather go with a normal flavor. I like mint choco the most.”

“Is that even a normal flavor? It tastes like toothpaste.” Yeonwoo stuck out her tongue in digust.

“I know, right??” Seungyoun high-fived his chairmate.

“Mint choco tastes great, though. I like it too.” Jinhee shrugged. The happy Yohan beamed and lifted his hand for a high-five too, which got her taken aback that she left his hand hanging a second too long, before touching it with her own palm timidly.

“Hello. May I take your order?” The tall male cashier greeted them. His small face then brightened up upon recognizing one of the four. “Oh, Yohan hyung! You brought your friends again. Wow, you’re really helping us a lot with the marketing.”

“Hi, Minhee. Can’t help it, the ice cream here is so good.” Yohan giggled. “Guys, this is my friend, Kang Minhee. He works as a part-timer here, but his parents own the shop.”

“Wow! Really? Nice to meet you!” The other three bowed, and so did the owner’s son.

“Let’s order first and talk to him later. What flavors do you guys want?” Yohan asked.

“I want the Fire Up ice cream on a brownie, please!” Seungyoun said.

“Strawberry cheesecake ice cream in a small cup, please,” Yeonwoo said.

“And Jinhee?” Yohan smiled at the girl next to him. “Do you want mint choco too?”

Jinhee tapped her bottom lip with her finger as she scanned through the names of the flavors. “Hmm… I like mint choco, but I’ll go with plain chocolate today.” She looked up at the taller and smiled. “I like it the most.”

“Should we order two scoops for you then?” Yohan’s little chuckle turned into a laugh when Jinhee waved her hands and tried to explain in panic.

“N-No, that’s not what I mean! One scoop is enough!”

“Okay, so the Fire Up and the strawberry cheesecake, and then two medium cups of chocolate and mint choco, please.” Yohan concluded their order.

“No, Yohan, just one scoop for me—"

“It’s fine, I ordered the same thing for myself.” Yohan smiled, shutting Jinhee up at once. Yeonwoo giggled and clapped her hands quietly at the scene.

“Like a romantic drama, huh?” Seungyoun bent down and whispered in Yeonwoo’s ear.

“You know about it?” Yeonwoo asked in surprise. As far as she knew, she was the only one who knew about Jinhee’s crush on Yohan.

“It’s obvious.” Seungyoun answered with a mysterious smile. “It wasn’t obvious before, but it is now.”

Done with their order, the four went back to their table, failing to notice the presence of a suspicious person right behind them.

It was a guy in a black hoodie, his head covered by the big hood and his face couldn’t be seen behind a pair of sunglasses and a black mask. One might think he was an idol in disguise.

“Hello. May I take your order?” Minhee the cashier greeted him.

“I’ll have what the girl ordered earlier.” His voice was deep and mysterious.

“Hm? Sorry, which girl?” Minhee asked.

“The one ordering just now. Long wavy black hair.” He nearly whispered.

“Ah, I see. Chocolate and mint choco in medium cup?” Minhee entered the order, somewhat curious and suspicious. “Anything else you’d like to order?”

“Nope.”

“That would be ₩5,000.”

As it was a busy night as usual, Minhee quickly forgot about the black hoodie guy. But when the line started to grow shorter and the place became less crowded, his gaze unintentionally fell on that guy, who was still there sitting alone in the darker side. The cashier boy then turned to see the other side, the day-mode part, where Yohan and his friends were joking and laughing loudly.

“Hmm.” Minhee rubbed his chin, observing both sides. “A stalker? Should I tell them? But maybe he’s not a stalker. Hm.”

He decided to shrug it off and serve the next customer.

The group continued on enjoying their night together, unaware of the sharp eyes that were studying them in the distance.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was the second half of chapter 2, I split it into two because it was too long. Enjoy!

__

* * *

_“I’ll aways stand with you_

_Smile at me like you do now_

_I’ll accept all of you without hesitating_

_I’ll hold you, so don’t get sick_

_Oh you, you, you are by my side_

_You’re the prettiest when you smile~!”_

_(Crayon – Pretty Girl)_

Jinhee ended her little performance in front of her mirror with a bright toothy smile, striking an adorable pose with her index fingers on her dimples.

“Waaaaaaaah my noona is ready to be an idol!” Junho barged in with loud cheers and pounced at his sister, sending both of them onto the bed. The Cha siblings giggled and rolled around as Jinhee struggled to keep her brother from sniffing her neck like a dog.

“Junho, stop, it tickles!” The older laughed and pushed the younger’s face away by his forehead. “How many times have I told you to knock? What if I was changing clothes?”

“Doesn’t matter, noona has watched me change clothes countless times too.” Junho giggled, his eyes curving up into crescents.

“It’s different, Junho. You have nothing to cover on your chest.” Jinhee chuckled and shook her head. Her sixteen-year-old brother still acted as innocent as ever.

A sudden sound of something hard and small hitting the balcony window got the siblings to jerk up to a sitting position. After a few seconds of silence, the same sound came again twice. Through the see-through curtain, they could see that those were tiny gravels being thrown by someone outside.

No one had ever thrown anything at their house.

“Oh no, are people coming to get us for a crime we didn’t do?” Junho said to himself, biting on his fingers.

Eyebrows knitted together, Jinhee slid off her bed and made her way to the balcony.

“Noona, be careful!” Junho whispered loudly.

Right when Jinhee took the first step outside, a gravel came flying and bounced off the top of her head. “Ouch! What the heck?!”

“Noona!” Junho scrambled off the bed and ran to cover his sister with his bigger body. When he saw the culprit, though, his mouth opened and closed in panic.

“W-Wooseok sunbaenim— Ah, no, wait. I have to be manly.” Junho clenched his fists and shifted from foot to foot as he mustered up all his courage. “S-Sunbaenim, that’s—that’s not cool! As a junior I have to respect you, but you will lose my respect if you hurt my noona!”

Wooshin – on his satan mode, of course, looking good in a plain black v-neck tee and grey camo shorts – rolled his eyes and clicked his tongue. “It was supposed to be you who got hit,” he said from down below.

“What do you want??” Jinhee snapped. “I said Wooseok could come, not you!”

“Wow, what a warm welcome. I’ve walked all the way here, aren’t you gonna invite me inside?” Wooshin smirked.

“You can walk back to where you came from, I’m not gonna stop you. Go ahead,” Jinhee threw a sarcastic answer. She didn’t even wait for a reply before pulling her brother back inside her room and shutting the balcony door.

“Why did he want to hit me?” Junho thought out loud, “Did I do something bad? Is he going to bully me at school until he graduates?”

“Don’t mind him, brother. He didn’t mean it.” Jinhee dropped herself flat onto her bed and huffed. “Why did he even show up just now? It’s been two weeks since I told Wooseok where I lived. I thought he had lost memory of that night.”

Her younger sibling lay down on his side next to her, propping his head up on his hand. “Maybe his good side tried to hold his bad side from coming here? If that makes sense. Like, you know, the tiny angel and devil who whisper in his ears. But today the angel was beaten up by the devil, so he came. And hit you with that rock. Although he actually wanted to hit me.”

“No, Junho, he didn’t want to hit you.” Jinhee sighed with a smile and rolled facing the younger. “I’ll kick his ass if he messes with my brother.”

“I’ll do the same if he harms my noona.” Junho tried to sound fierce, but the supposedly manly tiger looked more like an adorable cub instead when Jinhee poked his nose and made him giggle.

“Oh, noona, I almost forgot. I came here to show you this picture. Eunsang and I pulled a prank on Hyeongjun and he almost cried, it was hilarious!”

The siblings became too engrossed in their own fun little world that they quickly forgot the person outside who nearly ruined their perfect morning.

Not until ten minutes had passed, and another gravel thrown at the window got Jinhee to growl in anger.

“Urgh!” She stomped her way to the balcony, all words ready behind her lips to be poured out like a _blessing_ the rascal deserved.

“Wait, noona, you need protection!” Junho held a pillow in front of them before opening the balcony door. A smart move, because this time it was a bigger rock that came hitting the pillow. Jinhee gawked at the rock in disbelief.

“He wants to kill me, doesn’t he?” The girl turned to her brother with a dramatic expression on her face. “Thank you, brother. I owe you my life.”

“Not life, just a kiss.” Junho tapped his cheek. He turned into a giggling mess when he got the kiss he wanted.

“Cheeky boy.” Jinhee chuckled. “Don’t be like that to the girls at school, you hear me?”

“Hey, I want a kiss too.” A faint voice was heard from below. Of course, it was the troublemaker again.

“Oh sure, kiss this!” Jinhee grabbed the rock and threw it back to where it came from. Unfortunately, Wooshin’s quick reflex easily saved his head from the attack with a smooth dodge.

“Wow, fierce. I like it.” Wooshin chuckled and rested his elbow on his bike’s handle.

_Bike._ He had walked back home and then returned with a bike.

“What do you want??” Jinhee snarled. “I could report you for assault, you know?”

“Let me in.” Wooshin ignored the empty threat. “Come on, is that how you treat a guest?”

“You’re uninvited—!” Before Jinhee could finish her sentence, though, her dear mother came out and joined the scene. “Oh, great.” The girl deadpanned.

“Oh my, it’s you! You’re the one who helped me with my bags at the grocery store, right? Are you a friend of my kids?” The pretty, humble-looking mother looked up to the balcony and raised her eyebrows seeing her children there. “Jinhee? Junho? Why are you keeping your friend outside? That’s not how I raised you both. Come, come down and invite him in!”

Jinhee and Junho gawked, feeling betrayed. Their mother was on the devil’s side.

Wooshin had the biggest satisfied grin when Jinhee opened the gate for him with a flat face.

“Get in, wolf.”

“Ah, I was just passing by, but sure if you insist.” Wooshin left his bike outside and walked in with his hands in the pockets of his shorts, observing every part of the house.

The mother of the family, who had gone back inside then came out all dressed up in a simple black dress, carrying a black handbag and a car key in her hands.

“Oh, I’m so sorry, but I have to run now. I have an event to attend. Your dad is catching up with me later. Are you kids okay on your own?” The lady shot an apologetic look.

“…No, mom, we’re not okay.” _What the hell?_ Jinhee’s face screamed. _You invited this psycho-faced wolf in and now you’re going to leave us alone??_

“Why would you be not okay? There are two nice boys to guard you here! How silly.” the mother chuckled. “You kids have fun, don’t make a mess, okay? Bye bye!”

The three teenagers were left standing in silence as the mother left them so cheerfully.

“I like your mom. Good mom-in-law material,” Wooshin commented.

“Don’t. Even. Think. About it.” Jinhee forced out a smile through her clenched teeth. “Now, visiting time is over. Unfortunately we are closed, please kindly go home.”

Wooshin looked at Junho and motioned his head to the side, telling him to leave them alone.

“W-Why would I leave my sister alone with you?” Junho widened his eyes and held onto Jinhee’s arm. “I’m staying here.”

Irritated, Wooshin placed his hands on his hips and let out a long sigh. “What an itch in the balls.”

“What—”

High-pitched screams echoed throughout the house when suddenly Jinhee was swept off her feet by a pair of surprisingly strong arms, and then carried over the shoulder like a bag of rice, towards the door and away from her flabbergasted brother.

“Let go! I said let go of me!” Jinhee wriggled and smacked Wooshin’s back in a helpless attempt to break free. “Junhoooo, help me!! Why are you just standing there?!”

“H-He’s so small, and so cute, b-but so strong…” Junho whispered in awe.

“Stay still.” Wooshin stood by his bike and waited until Jinhee stopped struggling against him.

“Where are you taking me? Are you gonna kidnap me with that bike? Really??” Jinhee barked, and once again landed a fist on the boy’s back. “Just you wait and see, Junho will report you to the police!”

“I doubt he will. He likes me.” Wooshin climbed onto his bike and placed the snarling girl on the handlebar facing him, putting her hands on his own shoulders. “Hold onto me if you don’t want to fall.”

“No! Put me down—Aaaahh!!” Jinhee’s arms were wrapped around Wooshin’s neck tightly and her bare feet swung around until they found secure landing place on Wooshin’s thighs. The boy smirked in victory as he pedaled away in high speed.

“G-Give me my sister back, sunbaenim! Wooshin sunbaenim!” Junho’s yell was left hanging in the air.

“You’re a psycho, you know that??” Jinhee cried out loud, not daring to move an inch from her position.

“If I were a psycho, I wouldn’t let you hug me like this.” Wooshin chuckled. “Your face would’ve kissed the ground.”

“Hug you?? I’m holding on for my dear life!” Jinhee grabbed a handful of Wooshin’s hair and tugged his head back with all her might.

“Ow, ow! Let go, you’re going to kill us!”

The bike swerved left and right along the way until Wooshin yelled, “Ice cream! We’re going for ice cream!” and Jinhee released her tight grip on his hair.

“W-Why suddenly?” Jinhee pouted, trying not to look excited hearing the mention of her favorite dessert.

Wooshin let out a long sigh as he tilted his head side to side to stretch his strained neck. “What kid doesn’t like ice cream? Stay still, you’re really a handful.”

“Aish… Kid? Handful? Are you talking about yourself?” Jinhee rolled her eyes.

Instead of an ice cream shop like Jinhee expected, they stopped in front of a familiar house.

“Oh, come on.” Jinhee grunted. “I can’t believe I’m dumb enough to fall for that trick. Am I really a kid? This devil lured me in with ice cream and now he’s going to hold me hostage in his mighty hell.”

“Don’t be dramatic.” Smirking, Wooshin carried the poker-faced girl in his arms into his spacious yet painfully silent home.

_If I can be quick enough, I can smack him and escape with his bike. But he might kill me if he manages to catch me. But I can’t just do nothing… He’s right, Junho won’t even think of calling the police. That kid will come and stand outside and knock until the devil opens the door for him, because he’s too damn polite._

Various escape plans ran back and forth through Jinhee’s mind that she wasn’t even fully aware when Wooshin dropped her in a long white sofa, and then put on a pair of fluffy grey slippers on her bare feet, replacing her own slippers that had fallen off in the _kidnapping_ process. He then took her back in his arms and brought her to the kitchen, letting her sit in one of the tall chairs by the kitchen island.

_Oh look, a frying pan! I can use it as a weapon to knock him out—_

“What’s on your mind, princess?” Wooshin’s deep voice scattered Jinhee’s plans away. He was taking something out of the freezer as he said so – it was a big bucket of ice cream. He placed it in front of the stunned girl with a small smile. Not his usual sly smirk, just a nice little _smile._

“I didn’t lie, did I?” He said. “It’s chocolate. I know you like it.”

“H-How did you know?” _No, wait._ Jinhee shook her head. _This isn’t in my scenarios. He… He must’ve poisoned this thing. It’s Woosatan we’re facing here, not Wooseok—_

“I didn’t poison it or whatever.” Wooshin grabbed a spoon and proceeded to eat a spoonful of ice cream right from the bucket. “See? It’s good.”

“Why are you doing this? What do you want?” Jinhee narrowed her eyes in suspicion.

“Nothing.” Wooshin proceeded to collect some stuff from the fridge and the cabinets – an ice cream scoop, a small glass plate and a spoon, a banana, a bottle of chocolate syrup and whipped cream – in a short time, he prepared and served a nicely decorated banana split with three scoops of chocolate ice cream.

“Enjoy.” Wooshin sat in front of Jinhee and propped his chin up in his hand, watching her with his smiling dark eyes.

“Um.” Jinhee rubbed her nape and stared at the dessert, absolutely tempted to dig in. “…Thanks?”

Hesitating, Jinhee grabbed the small spoon and proceeded to eat the ice cream. “It’s good.” She licked off the ice cream left on her lips, and Wooshin’s gaze trailed down to the wet, shiny trail left on her lower lip. “Stop staring, please. It’s awkward.”

Wooshin tilted his head to the side and rested his cheek in his palm. His mouth remained shut, but his eyes were blinking slowly – perhaps _affectionately._

“So,” Jinhee cleared her throat, “how did you know? That I like chocolate ice cream.”

“I just know.” Wooshin smirked. “This flavor is just like me. Dark but sweet. Right? I knew you’d like it.”

Jinhee pretended to gag and rolled her eyes. “I have nothing to say about that.”

“I also know that you like mint choco. But that flavor is disgusting. The first time I ate it was also the last time.” Wooshin leaned closer, his smirk growing bigger. “Having one favorite is enough. Which one do you like more? The sexy chocolate or the nasty mint choco?”

Jinhee stopped eating and put the spoon down. “Okay, spill it. What did you do?”

“What did I do?” Wooshin raised his eyebrows.

“Who gave you that information?”

“Nobody.”

“Don’t lie.”

“Not lying. You haven’t answered me.”

“Answer what?”

“Which one do you like more?”

Wooshin’s unwavering gaze made Jinhee wonder how much confidence he really had.

“I like chocolate the most.” Jinhee rolled her eyes once again when a big smile bloomed on Wooshin’s face.

He had a sweet smile, she had to admit. It was his biggest smile that she had seen so far.

But sadly, that smile came out not on Wooseok mode.

“It feels good to hear that,” Wooshin said.

“Why would it feel good? I like chocolate ice cream, I didn’t say I like you.” Jinhee snorted and continued on shoving the dessert into her mouth, this time somewhat more fiercely.

Wooshin chuckled. “It still feels good.”

_Weirdo,_ Jinhee thought. _Maybe Yohan told him about it. Otherwise how could he know the exact flavors I ate two days ago? And besides, why does he hate mint choco that much?_

“Anyways.” Jinhee looked around. “Where’s your uncle? Are you allowed to kidnap girls randomly like this?”

“When he’s gone, his rules don’t apply to me.” Wooshin leaned back and crossed his arms, flying his gaze into the distance. “That old man isn’t coming home for a week.”

“So, you’re on your own.” Jinhee pointed at the other with her spoon. “Can you take care of yourself?”

“Can I? That’s what I do all the time.”

The hint of annoyance on Wooshin’s face surprised the other. _Does his uncle… not take care of him?_

“…When did he leave?” Despite being curious, Jinhee decided not to be too straightforward.

“This morning.”

_Ah, I shouldn’t ask anything about his uncle anymore,_ Jinhee thought as she noticed the other’s expression turning darker and darker.

“Hmm… Do you want some?” Jinhee offered a spoon of ice cream with a smile.

Wooshin shifted his gaze back and forth between the spoon and Jinhee’s smile. “No, it’s for you.” His features softened along with his voice.

“You gave me three scoops, I can’t finish them all. Have some.”

“If you insist.”

Slowly leaning forward, Wooshin wrapped his fingers gently around Jinhee’s wrist, and took the cold treat into his mouth. He didn’t let go of the spoon and release Jinhee’s hand until she pulled it back herself.

Wooshin glided his tongue across his lips and let his chin drop to his chest, not uttering a single word.

_Why is he acting like this? Is this not Wooseok mode right now?_ “Everything okay?” Jinhee continued to eat while watching the other cautiously.

“Are you uncomfortable?” Wooshin didn’t lift his head.

“Huh?”

“Do I make you feel uncomfortable?”

Suddenly Jinhee remembered their first day as chairmates, when Hangyul had told him to move from the seat that she had tagged for Yeonwoo.

_“Do I make you feel uncomfortable?”_ Wooshin had asked her that time.

_“Duh! Obviously.”_

Jinhee grimaced from the guilty feeling upon recalling her answer.

_Yeah, he was rude… but I was rude too._

“Not really. It’s just… a bit awkward here.” She let out a forced laugh.

“Then, I’ll pick you up again tomorrow night.”

“W-What? Why?”

“No reasons.”

Jinhee tilted her head, trying to get a glimpse of the other’s face. _What a strange kid._

“Do you perhaps need a friend here? Since you’re going to be alone for a week.” Jinhee thought out loud. “Should I ask Seungyoun to come and have a sleepover here?”

“No. I don’t need him here.” At last, the boy lifted his head and looked at the other in the eye. “I said I’ll pick _you_ up. That’s final.”

Jinhee pouted at the unequivocal tone. “Why don’t I have a say in this? Am I an item? Tsk… Fine. I hope Wooseok comes out tomorrow.” Her last sentence came out as a mumble, but Wooshin heard it clear.

“I won’t let that loser take over any time soon. He can try, but he’s too weak.” Wooshin took Jinhee’s empty dish and went to wash it in silence.

_Huh... So Wooshin and Wooseok are prolly fighting over the control now._

Wooshin turned off the water, and the silence was then broken by rapid knocks on the front door. Jinhee didn’t fail to catch him flinch at that sound.

“Excuse me! Excuse me, Wooseok—Wooshin sunbaenim, are you there? Please return my sister this instant! Sunbaenim! Open the door, please!”

“About time.” Wooshin grabbed Jinhee’s wrist and led her to the front door.

“Noona! Are you okay?” Junho gasped at the sight of his sister.

“I’m okay, Junho—Wait, what are you doing?” Jinhee turned his head back and forth between the perplexed Junho and the poker-faced Wooshin, who was pulling her past her brother and towards his bike that had been left fallen on the ground.

“Taking you home,” Wooshin answered with a flat tone.

“But my brother— I-I can walk back with him! He’s walked all the way here, I can’t leave him—Do you hear me, Kim Wooshin? I’m not going to come again if you bully my brother!”

Wooshin ignored the girl’s nagging, and got ready to lift and sit her on the bike handlebar again.

“Wait, wait, fine! I’ll sit behind you. Sheesh, is this a pre-wedding photoshoot?”

Wooshin smiled in victory as Jinhee sat on the back seat on her own and scowled at him.

“I’m so sorry, brother. Let’s meet again at home.” Jinhee shot her sibling an apologetic look.

“It’s okay, noona, hold on tight and don’t fall! Don’t worry, I’ll catch up soon!” Junho yelled at the two, who quickly went away and disappeared around the block.

The little brother sighed and bit his finger, feeling conflicted.

“Should I tell Yohan hyung?”


	4. Chapter 4

* * *

_Ding! Dong!_ A sound of a bell rang, piercing the silence in the warm night air.

The gate was opened, revealing a boy in a long-sleeve white shirt and a pair of grey training pants. His black hair was damp, and his after-shower scent was fresh and manly.

On the other side of the gate, a girl with her messy long hair, wearing a pair of baby pink pajamas and a dying look on her face.

“Sorry, Cha Jinhee is unavailable and too tired at the moment. Please come again next life.” Jinhee murmured and closed the gate, but the boy’s swift hand slipped in and held it from being shut.

“It won’t take long,” Wooshin said, “I brought my bike.”

“I’ll tell my dad so he’ll make you go away.”

Wooshin caught Jinhee’s wrist before she could walk back into her house.

“…I’m alone,” Wooshin said.

“Doesn’t that sound kinda unsafe for a girl?” Jinhee yawned.

“Please.”

One simple word got Jinhee stunned. _Wooshin can say ‘please’? Wow, he must be really desperate._

“Fine. Not more than half an hour. My parents are busy watching a drama right now, but it ends in thirty minutes.”

Wooshin nodded and immediately pulled the other towards his bike.

“It’s the first time I go out in pajamas.” Jinhee sighed.

“Doesn’t matter, nobody sees it.” After Jinhee was seated behind him, Wooshin pedaled away quickly towards his own home.

They failed to notice the presence of the boy standing on the balcony, who was watching over them in anxiety.

“So, what now?” Jinhee asked as soon as they entered the empty house. “Don’t do anything stupid, please. School was tiring already.”

“Ice cream?”

“No, thanks. I’m full.”

“Okay.” Wooshin took her wrist and led her upstairs towards his room.

“Don’t you think it’s too soon to bring a girl into your room?” Jinhee asked groggily. But her eyes then rounded as soon as the whole view of the bedroom was registered into her mind.

It was just about the size of her own room, quite spacious yet not too big for one person. The walls had baby blue wallpapers, the same color as the furniture, and the floor was covered by soft carpets in light grey and white. What surprised Jinhee the most was the giant white stuffed cat in the corner of the room, with scattered toys and smaller stuffed animals around it.

It was just like a bedroom of a little boy.

Except that there was a huge flat screen TV in it.

“Is this… your room?” Jinhee asked carefully.

“Yeah. Never changed room since I moved here.” Wooshin closed the door behind them.

“Can I look around?” Jinhee asked.

Wooshin cleared his throat and looked away. “Sure.”

Jinhee went to take a closer look of the giant white cat in the corner. It was even taller than her.

“Wow, it’s so big and cute.” Jinhee gaped in awe.

“My mom sent me that on my eleventh birthday. It looks like my old pet back in my hometown, but it’s dead now.” Wooshin crouched down next to the other and scanned through the toys.

“Sorry to hear that.” Jinhee looked down at the various kinds of toys – blocks, toy cars and train, puzzles, and the old stuffed animals. “But, the other toys? Do you still play with them?”

Wooshin breathed out a long sigh. “Sometimes. Don’t ask why.”

“Why?”

“Don’t know why.” The boy pinched the bridge of his nose out of embarrassment. “It’s not me, okay? I’m not retarded. Even if I put them away, they always end up back in my room.”

_Could it be…? Does he have another hidden personality?_

“Well… Anyways, thanks for showing me these.” Jinhee smiled. “It’s something very personal, isn’t it?”

Wooshin looked up at the other, his expression unreadable. “Don’t tell anyone to come here. Don’t tell anyone about this.”

“I won’t. Don’t worry about that.” Jinhee chuckled, taking a mental note to be extra careful when talking to her friends later.

The boy grabbed an orange-and-white stuffed fox from the pile of toys and stood up. “Take this home.”

“Huh? You’re giving it to me?” Jinhee blinked at the toy. “Why?”

“It looks like you.” Wooshin’s smirk was back on his lips.

“Pfft, no. You’re the fox, it looks like you.”

“Then take it, so it will remind you of me when you see it.”

Jinhee’s first reaction was faking a gag at the cheesiness. But upon realizing that the boy wasn’t joking, she took the stuffed animal doubtfully and held it in her arms.

“Thanks, I guess.” Jinhee cleared her throat awkwardly and walked away to Wooshin’s desk, in an attempt to escape the awkward atmosphere.

Other than some books, a black pencil case, and a white mug, there were some framed photographs arranged neatly on the desk. All of them were pictures of Wooshin and his parents in his childhood.

_His parents are good-looking. No wonder._

Dimples curved on Jinhee’s cheeks when she saw a picture of baby Wooshin, smiling brightly on his dad’s shoulders.

“Oh gosh, how cute! Who is this chubby baby? Is it really you? My, my, I can’t believe you used to be that cute.” She giggled.

Not used to being praised, Wooshin jutted out his bottom lip and scratched his nape awkwardly.

“Aww, you were wearing a sailor suit here! Cutest baby ever, I swear. Oh gosh, look at those cheeks. Where did those buns go? Can I bite them?”

“That’s enough.” Wooshin pulled the shorter by the collar. “I’ll show you around.”

Jinhee’s short visit became a house tour as Wooshin took her around and showed the rooms in his uncle’s house. It was a big house, but definitely a man’s house. Lacking feminine touch, no plants, monochrome decorations, everything was kept as simple and minimalist as possible.

“Sorry for asking, but… Is your uncle not married?” Jinhee couldn’t hold her curiosity in.

“He was, but his wife left his egoistic ass. Made things harder around here.” Wooshin rolled his eyes.

“Sorry for asking.” Jinhee repeated. Her feet then came to an abrupt halt and a gasp escaped her mouth when Wooshin opened the door to the back of the house. “Whoa! You have a swimming pool! But… But why is it empty?”

“None of us has time to use it and clean it.” Wooshin shrugged. “You wanna swim?”

“I want.” Jinhee stared at the big pool with excited sparkling eyes. “Ah, but of course not now. Maybe this weekend? Can we invite the others too? They don’t have to see your room.”

“No,” Wooshin rejected immediately. “You can come and swim here, just you.”

“Why only me?”

“No reasons.”

“Ugh, that doesn’t answer anything.” Jinhee sighed. “Have I seen everything here? It’s about time I go back home.”

“Everything, except my uncle’s room. You don’t need to see it. Let’s go back.” Wooshin led their way out the house, got his bike, and took the girl back to her home without a word.

“Thanks for this cute fox,” Jinhee said after getting off the bike. “I’ll keep it in my room, and maybe think of a name for it later.”

“Good. It deserves a name.” Wooshin blinked slowly and smiled a little. “I’ll come again tomorrow. Good night.”

“Again? But—”

Before Jinhee could finish her words, Wooshin had gone away into the night.

“Tsk. What to do with that kid?”

When Jinhee sneaked back in, she saw her brother in the living room, telling their puzzled-looking parents an exaggerated story with his whole body, trying so hard to entertain them and keep them there. She used the chance to run upstairs to her room while they weren’t looking.

“And… And then… And then Hyeongjunie and I ran away as fast as we could! Can you believe that? We witnessed a teacher and a student flirting and almost got caught!”

_Oh, what a silly sweet brother I have._ Jinhee slipped into her room and quietly closed the door, hid the stuffed fox under her blanket, and then came back out with a loud fake yawn to get her family’s attention.

“Oh, Jinny! We thought you were asleep. Did you wake up just now?” The mother piped up. “Come here, your brother is telling us something scandalous at your school. Is it really true?”

_Thank goodness, they didn’t notice me leaving._ Jinhee went down and sat next to Junho, who seemed utterly concerned about her.

_“Thank you,”_ the older sibling mouthed and smiled, much to the younger’s relief.

Later that night, when their parents were asleep, Junho came to his sister’s room and interrogated her in a timid way.

“Where did you go with him, noona? Why didn’t you say anything?” the younger asked.

“To his home. Like I told you before, his uncle is on a business trip until this Sunday. I guess he’s just lonely. Don’t worry, brother, he didn’t do anything bad. He even gave me this.” Jinhee took out her fox from its hiding spot under her blanket and showed it to the younger. “It’s cute, right?”

“It is.” Junho smiled adorably. “It looks old, but still cute. Why did he give you that? Does he… like you?”

“I don’t know. I wouldn’t say he likes me. Maybe he just needs a friend whom he can trust, and nothing more.” Jinhee hugged her fox and sighed. “I really feel bad for troubling you, but I’ll have to go with him again tomorrow night… Can you help me?”

Despite not being said out loud, it was clear as the sky that Junho was against it. But the boy could never say no to his sister.

“I’ll try my best.” Junho forced out a smile. “Just make sure not to leave your phone again, noona. I’ll have to make sure you’re okay with him alone. I was planning on going out and looking for you earlier, you know?”

Touched and thankful, Jinhee threw her arms around the other and squeezed the air out of him.

“Thank you, Junho. You’re the best brother ever.”

* * *

Wooshin came again.

And again, and again, and again.

Jinhee had begun to wonder if the Wooshin alter had gained control over the personality switching. Even though he was on Wooseok mode at school during the day, he always switched to Wooshin at night for five days straight.

“Noona. I’ve run out of tricks to distract Mom and dad, they will find out soon if we don’t come up with a new plan. Can’t you go and come back earlier? Maybe go straight to his place after school?” Junho suggested in the sixth morning.

“I’ll see which alter will show up today. If he stays on Wooshin mode until school ends, I’ll go home together with him. But it’s a different case with Wooseok. He’s too shy,” Jinhee said.

“Ah, it’d be nice if we could find a way to trigger the switching. Like a remote control.” The younger thought out loud and tapped his chin. “Make him mad? Maybe that will trigger the Wooshin alter out.”

“I doubt if Wooseok could even get mad. But I’ll try. Thanks for the suggestion, brother.”

The bell rang, and the siblings parted ways to their respective classrooms.

“H-Hi, Jinhee.”

Jinhee was greeted by a small shy smile when she turned around. Wooseok fixed his glasses’ position and walked faster to match Jinhee’s pace.

“Good morning, Wooseok!” Jinhee beamed. “Just arrived?”

“Yes, I slept in.” Wooseok bowed his head to hide his sheepish smile.

“Something happened last night?” Jinhee tested, to see if the boy remembered anything. She hadn’t asked him about it in the past five days.

“Um… Wooshin took over. I hope nothing bad happened.” The boy stole a cautious glance, and sighed in relief finding a bright toothy smile on Jinhee’s face.

“It’s unfortunate that you can’t remember a single thing from the past five nights.” Jinhee giggled seeing the other’s dumbstruck face.

“N-Nights? I mean, f-five… nights?” The poor boy began to panic. “Did we… do something?”

Jinhee broke into a laughter. “What are you thinking, Wooseok? It depends on what kind of _something_ you mean. But yes, we did some stuff.”

“A-Ah.” Wooseok dropped his head and pushed his glasses up. “I’m sorry that I can’t remember. Would you tell me… if it doesn’t make you mad?”

“Hmm, let me think. No?” Jinhee’s laugh intensified as Wooseok panicked even more.

“I must’ve done something bad. What do I do? I-I’m so sorry.” The taller flinched getting an unexpected pat on his back.

“It’s alright, Wooseok. You didn’t do anything bad.” Jinhee giggled. _Ah, it’s so fun to tease him. Sometimes it feels llike taking revenge on Wooshin, but that’s really not it. He’s just fun to tease._

The school hours began and continued on throughout the day with Wooseok staying on his shy kitten mode. Jinhee began to worry.

_It’ll be bad if he switches to Wooshin at night and comes again to pick me up. Junho is right, it’s better to go straight to his place after school, so I won’t have to sneak out. I gotta find a way to make him switch._

When the last break time came, Jinhee rushed to the back of the class, where Hangyul and his squad were seated.

“Wow, princess has come out her castle to see us, the wretched, lowly people. What an honor. It doesn’t happen once a year.” Hangyul stood up and bowed. “What brings you here, princess?”

“Stop that. Can you do me a favor? This is pretty urgent,” Jinhee whispered.

“With pleasure. Which ass should I beat?” Hangyul said jokingly, cracking his fingers.

“If Wooseok stays as Wooseok when school ends, please make him mad. I need him to switch to Wooshin.” Jinhee glanced over her shoulder to see the said boy, diligently doing a homework that was due next week.

“That’s tough. Ain’t easy to piss him off. What will I get in return?” Hangyul wiggled his eyebrows.

“Seriously? Fine, you can copy my homework. How’s that?” Jinhee’s offer made the big boy laugh.

“I was joking, but that sounds good. Deal!” Hangyul moved the girl aside by the shoulders and made his way to Wooseok.

“Hey, hey, I said after school! Not now!”

The last class of the day ended, Wooseok still hadn’t switched, as Jinhee feared.

_Smack!_

“Ow!”

“Hey, Wooseok buddy!”

Wooseok winced in pain and held the back of his head while Hangyul laughed and took him in a headlock.

“How are you, kiddo? How’s my nerdy twink?” Hangyul messed the smaller boy’s hair, tugging it hard in the process.

“Ah, ow— P-Please let go of me.” Wooseok wheezed and tapped Hangyul’s muscular arm around his neck.

“Isn’t that a bit too much?” Yeonwoo whispered to Jinhee in concern. “What if he dies instead of switching?”

“Let’s just… watch a little more.” Jinhee grimaced at the scene.

Seungyoun and Yeonwoo, who had been told about Wooshin’s regular night visit, shot each other an anxious look and shrugged.

“It doesn’t look like it’s working, though,” Seungyoun said. “Oh, it’s starting to look like bullying.”

“Please give my glasses back. Please.” Wooseok squinted and reached his hands out, trying to catch Hangyul in his blurry sight.

“Wow, these glasses make me high.” Hangyul crossed his eyes and pulled a funny face wearing Wooseok’s glasses, making their classmates laugh. He began to run around the class while doing taekwondo tricks and making loud noises.

“Woooo-wah!” He threw a flying kick and continued to run, while Wooseok struggled to go after him, tripping on this and that around the classroom.

“Poor Wooseok.” Seungyoun looked like he was about to cry. “Oh—Oh no!”

The three gasped when Wooseok tripped once again and fell flat on the floor.

“Please get angry, please get angry.” Jinhee fought her strong urge to run towards his chairmate and hug him. “Gosh, I’m so evil for letting this happen to him.”

Trembling slightly, Wooseok gathered himself off the floor and kneeled with his head hung low.

“No, no, no, I can’t do this.” At last, Jinhee ran to the boy and exclaimed, “Stop it, Hangyul!”

However, before Jinhee could reach Wooseok, the presence of someone entering the half empty classroom caught her attention.

_Yohan…? He never comes here, why suddenly?_

“Wow, what’s happening here?” Yohan laughed. “Whoa, whoa, be careful!”

Stunned, Jinhee didn’t see a backpack laid in her track and tripped with her arms flailing in the air dramatically. She squeezed her eyes shut ready for the pain and embarrassment of kissing the floor – except that instead of falling on the floor, she fell into a pair of arms that were quick enough to catch her.

“Are you okay?”

The deep, warm chuckle behind her ear sent a big amount of red blooming on Jinhee’s cheeks.

“Y-Yohan.” Jinhee retracted herself from Yohan’s arms quickly and tucked her long hair behind her ear, unable to look anywhere else but the floor.

Meanwhile, Seungyoun and Yeonwoo were guffawing and clapping their hands so happily in their seats.

“A live drama!” Seungyoun whistled, long and loud.

Wooseok, who had also witnessed the scene, dropped his head once again and clenched his fists against the floor.

“Hey buddy, sorry for picking on you.” Hangyul came to him, put his glasses in front of him on the floor, and offered a hand. “Come, get up.”

The classroom fell silent as more students headed out. Silently, Wooseok took his glasses, put them back on, and slowly got up on his feet.

The moment he lifted his chin, his fist came in contact with Hangyul’s face with a powerful swing. The bigger boy was caught off guard and wobbled a few steps back before he regained his balance.

Everyone gawked like dead fish, including Hangyul himself.

“Damn, where did that power come from?” The taekwondo boy muttered in awe.

“W-Wooshin?” Jinhee called.

Behind those glasses weren’t innocent round eyes anymore, but a pair of cold, dark eyes that sent chills down their spine.

Wooshin had finally come, and not just Wooshin – it was an _angry_ Wooshin.

His cold murderous gaze slowly shifted from Hangyul’s wounded face to someone unexpected – Kim Yohan.

And his fists clenched even tighter at the sight of him.

Startled to be in the spotlight, Yohan widened his eyes and looked around, like a confused rabbit in a hungry fox’s territory.

“W-Wooshin, let’s go home—”

A simple gesture of Wooshin’s hand easily shut Jinhee up, just by raising his index finger. The angry fox walked closer to the bunny until they were just inches apart, but Yohan, being the taller and bigger one, stood his ground and looked back with now challenging eyes.

Wooshin pressed his index finger on Yohan’s chest, and through his clenched teeth, he warned, “I know what you’re up to. This is the first and last warning. Keep. Your. Hands. Off. MY girl.”

With that, Wooshin turned on his heels, grabbed Jinhee’s wrist, and led her out the classroom leaving everyone flabbergasted.

“Wooshin, wait—” Jinhee tried to pry Wooshin’s hand off her wrist, but to no avail. “You misunderstood, he didn’t mean anything. I was falling, he was just helping me!” _And I’m not even YOUR girl!_ Jinhee held the last sentence in, because she knew better than to add more oil to the fire.

“Are you naïve or dumb?” Wooshin continued to stomp his way out the school building.

Pouting, Jinhee decided that arguing with Wooshin wouldn’t be the wisest thing to do at the moment.

“Are you jealous?” She scoffed.

“No.”

“Don’t be mad at Hangyul, I asked for his help to call you out and replace Wooseok for a moment.”

Wooshin stopped walking abruptly, causing Jinhee to crash into him.

“Ouch, what’s wrong?” Jinhee winced.

“You wanted me out to replace that loser?” Wooshin asked without looking at the other.

“Yeah. Well, you see, Junho suggested that I should go straight to your place after school so I won’t have to sneak out again tonight and make my parents suspicious. I can come up with a reason for coming home late, but not for going out late at night.”

Wooshin remained silent even after Jinhee had finished her explanation.

“Um, we should get going.” Jinhee shook her wrist in Wooshin’s hand. “The sooner I can go home, the better.”

As usual, their bus that evening was quite packed with exhausted-looking people. There was only one empty seat left when they climbed in; Wooshin secured it quickly for Jinhee, and after she was seated, he held onto a handrail and stood facing her.

His previously pissed-looking face then just looked tired. He loosened his tie and unbuttoned the top two buttons of his shirt.

“You look tired. Should I just come tomorrow?” Jinhee asked, lowering her volume in the crowded yet quiet bus.

Wooshin shook his head. “Not tired.”

_Fifteen minutes later…_

_Thud!_

Wooshin collapsed facing down onto his bed, sprawled flat like a stickman. Jinhee heaved a sigh and smiled seeing him fall asleep at that instant.

“Not tired, huh?” She sat on the edge of the bed and tapped his arm. “Hey, at least get changed first. Wear something comfortable. Wooshin? Wake up.”

Wooshin’s drowsy eyes fluttered open halfway.

“Stay here tonight.”

Jinhee looked down at her hand that had been taken into his loose grip, contemplating how to react.

_Do I take my hand back? Or do I let this dramatic cheesiness go on?_

She chose the latter, out of curiosity.

“No school tomorrow.” Wooshin tried to convince groggily.

“Hmm. I don’t think that would be the right thing to do.” Jinhee pretended to think hard.

“Why?”

“Well. We’re alone. You’re a boy, I’m a girl.” Jinhee paused to choose her next words. “And… There are more than one you, but there’s only one me.”

“Nothing will happen.” Not letting go of the hand in his, Wooshin pushed himself up to a sitting position and rubbed his eye like a kid. “You can wear my clothes and sleep in my bed. I’ll sleep on the floor.”

_Does he really want it that bad?_ Jinhee sighed and bit her bottom lip, contemplating. _We’re not that close yet for a sleepover, not to mention just the two of us. But maybe I can discover something important if I stay._

“Will you stay?”

It was getting too hard for Jinhee to say no when Wooshin held her hand even tighter and shot a sad puppy look.

“Ahh, okay, okay! I’ll stay. But if you do something stupid, I’ll never come again and you’ll sit with Seungyoun at school.” Jinhee warned.

Wooshin’s pouty lips then turned into a mischievous cheeky smile.

“Deal.”

The skinny boy hopped off his bed and proceeded to dig his closet to find clothes for his guest.

“I can ask Junho to bring me some clothes,” Jinhee said.

“No need, let him rest.” Wooshin pulled out a long-sleeve baby blue shirt and a pair of white shorts. “These will do. Do you want my underwear too?”

Jinhee’s mouth fell open. “Are you serious? I’d rather wear nothing inside than your underwear!”

“Really?” Wooshin’s pervy smirk made Jinhee slap herself in the face.

“Just pretend I didn’t say anything,” she deadpanned.

“You’re gonna wear nothing inside?”

“I have the one I’m wearing, you know.”

“My clean underwear won’t make you pregnant.”

“Shut up.”

Wooshin chuckled. “You go first while I prepare the bed and do some cleaning.”

_Ah, right, he has to take care of the house on his own,_ Jinhee thought. “Do you need some help?”

“No, I’m good.”

By the time Jinhee had finished showering, Wooshin was mopping the floor downstairs with earphones plugged in his ears.

“So, the naughty boy can be responsible and hardworking too.” Jinhee smiled to herself, watching from upstairs. “Ah, it must be so tiring to live like this.”

Still with a towel draped over her head, Jinhee skipped her way down cheerfully and hopped into Wooshin’s field of sight.

“HEY!”

“W-Woah! You surprised me!” The poor boy jumped back and clutched his chest, nearly slipping in the process. He took off his earphones and yelled, “Why putting that towel on your head? I thought a ghost appeared!”

Jinhee cackled and clapped her hands, totally satisfied with the reaction. It was the first time Wooshin raised his voice to that extent, and the high tone made his intimidating aura disappear with no traces left.

Wooshin’s cheeks puffed out as he blew out a big sigh to calm his racing heart. Just then he noticed his clothes that were then on the girl’s body.

They were just a _little_ too big, just a size above, since Wooshin himself was a small boy. But they definitely looked good on her.

“They suit you,” he mumbled, averting his gaze away. “You can have that shirt if you want.”

“It’s comfortable, but it’s yours.” Jinhee grinned. “Let me continue the chores, you take a shower now.”

“I didn’t invite you here to be my maid. Go back upstairs, I’ll finish soon.” Wooshin plugged an earphone back in his ear and continued to mop the floor.

“Hmph, then I’ll just find some chores myself.”

Before Jinhee could walk away, though, she was pulled back by the shoulder. Wooshin didn’t look too happy.

“Don’t you need to tell your parents that you’re not coming home? And maybe ask your girl friend to pretend you’re staying at her place?” He cocked an eyebrow.

Jinhee gasped. “You’re right. I gotta ask for Yeonwoo’s help.”

And just with that, Wooshin managed to make her go back to his room at that instant.

“Silly kid.” Turning around, Wooshin shook his head and secretively smiled to himself.

Meanwhile, upstairs, Jinhee paced back and forth in panic while texting her mom, and then chatting with Junho and Yeonwoo, asking for their backup in case her parents asked them about her whereabouts.

“How could I forget to contact everyone? I was supposed to tell them right after shower. Ah, what time is it? Why haven’t mom and dad called me, though? It must be Junho. Oh, my savior… He must’ve come up with a smart excuse to save my ass again.”

_Flash._

A notification sound – the whispered ending part of a famous K-Pop song – came along with Junho’s reply.

_“Woah noona, good coincidence! I told mom and dad that you went to Yeonwoo noona’s place after school.”_

Jinhee blew out a sigh in relief. “As expected of the Chacha siblings. We’re so in sync.” She shrugged smugly and gave herself a proud pat on the shoulder.

_Flash. Flash. Flash. Flash._

More notification sounds filled the room as both Junho and Yeonwoo’s messages quickly took turns to come in. Before Jinhee could even read them, though, the screen displayed an incoming call from her dear old friend.

_“Are you crazy, Cha Jinhee? You want me to cover you up while you stay at a mentally unstable boy’s place?! If a murder happens, then I’ll be charged too for covering your traces. Look, I hope you know what you’re doing. It’s not too late to change your mind, Jinny. Even though I live far away, I’ll personally come and take you home!”_

Instead of taking it seriously, Jinhee laughed at Yeonwoo’s nagging.

“I know what I’m doing, granny Yeonwoo. You don’t need to worry about me. Nothing bad will happen! Murder, that’s funny.” Jinhee’s laugh faltered. _That’s impossible… Right?_

_“I don’t understand why you have to be that close to him. We DO want to befriend him and learn about his mental illness and all, but sleeping with him is not how you do it, Jinny.”_

“W-Why do you make it sound so wrong? It’s an innocent sleepover, I tell you!” Jinhee’s face reddened.

While on the phone, Jinhee let her feet bring her around the room, her hand poking and touching everything in her way. She traced her index finger across Wooshin’s collection of books in the shelf next to his desk.

And suddenly she froze, her eyes wide on a particular title.

_Soul Puzzle: Me and Eight Strangers in My Body._

“Y-Yeonwoo, wait… I-I think I’ve found something.”

As if her eyes had just been flicked open, she found more similar titles which all had the same theme: _dissociative identity disorder_.

_“What did you find?? Tell me! Is it porn?”_ Yeonwoo sounded excited on the other end of the line. _“…Condoms?”_

“AISH!” Jinhee yelled out of embarrassment. “When did you become a pervert? Did Seungyoun do that to you??”

_“N-No! He’s an innocent baby boy! A cute giant baby bo—”_ Jumping back to her senses, Yeonwoo paused and cleared her throat. _“So, what did you find?”_

“Books. Many books about his disorder.” Jinhee lowered her voice, in case the boy had finished and was coming back.

_“Oh! Then he must be fully aware of his condition now,”_ Yeonwoo said.

“Yeah… So he also studies himself like this.” _Back then, when we met at the bus stop near the bookstore… Did he go there to buy one of these books?_ Jinhee thought. _Then, he probably knew I was testing him when I asked about Seungyoun’s bread. And… that’s why he called me baby fox. Because I tried to be tricky with that question, but it was still obvious._

_“Hey, Cha Jinhee? Are you still there?”_ Yeonwoo’s voice pulled Jinhee back from diving deeper into her thoughts.

“Huh? Sorry, did you say something?” Jinhee asked.

_“I said, I think it’s about time you talk to him openly about his mental disorder. We still don’t know if he even gets any professional treatments. If you talk about it, maybe you’ll also find out what caused it, who knows? Right, it’s the best thing to do while you’re there, so he won’t have a chance to get naughty on you.”_

“G-Get naughty? Why do you keep going back to that part?? Stop it or I won’t be able to sleep tonight!” Jinhee huffed, while the other giggled on the other end. “Alright, I’ll try to talk to him if I get the right timing.”

As if she was well-trained to sense Wooshin’s presence, her skin crawled feeling him approaching. Quickly she said goodbye and ended the call, climbed onto his bed and opened a game app, pretending she was busy on it.

And the door swung open right after.

“…Gaaahhhhh!!” Jinhee dropped her phone and covered her eyes with both hands. “Where did your shirt go?? Put it back on!”

_Get naughty on you._ Yeonwoo’s suggestive words echoed in Jinhee’s head.

_Is he really that kind of guy…?_

Smirking, Wooshin walked over to his closet while drying his wet hair with the towel slung around his neck. A pair of black shorts were hanging low on his narrow hips. Other than that, there was nothing else covering his skin.

“Chill. I know I’m sexy, but you don’t have to fangirl over me that much.” He chuckled.

“Who’s fangirling, huh??” Jinhee grabbed a pillow and tossed it across the room, successfully hitting the boy square on his back. He laughed.

_Sexy my ass._ Jinhee huffed and blew her bangs up, averting her gaze away.

It was just a glimpse. She didn’t let herself get a clear view of it, but she saw a glimpse of it; his body was toned and his arms were muscular. No one would have expected Kim Wooseok to have a trained body.

It caught her off guard, yes, but something else shocked her even more than that.

A faint, long diagonal line across his back. A very big scar.

Being soft at heart, Jinhee’s eyes began to feel hot just from thinking of what might have caused that scar.

On the other side, the oblivious Wooshin threw a random white shirt on and went to put his towel away, and then came back with his usual smirk.

“What were you doing?” He lay down on his belly and propped his head up on his hand, observing the features of Jinhee’s face with his intense eyes.

Something in his natural after-shower scent made Jinhee loosen up and feel calm in his presence. It felt comfortable, like home.

“P-Playing games.” _Why am I stuttering?_ Jinhee avoided eye contact and awkwardly cleared her throat. “I want to ask something.”

“Me too.” In a swift roll-over, Wooshin’s head was then laid in Jinhee’s lap. The girl gasped and retracted her upper body in surprise, as if a bomb had just been thrown at her.

“W-What are you doing!” She tried to remove the head from her lap, but apparently his neck muscle was stronger than her arms.

“Do you not like me?”

Jinhee stopped struggling and pouted. “W-Why suddenly asking that? I… I don’t like you when you act like a jerk.”

“Define ‘like a jerk’.” Wooshin blinked slowly, his tone cold but soft at the same time.

“Well, like when you don’t care about personal space. And when you do whatever you want. When you don’t give a damn about how your actions make others feel. When you act so RUDE even to people you don’t know well, and assume negative things about them, and threaten them based on those assumptions!”

Jinhee fumed and scowled at the expressionless face that was staring back at her, secretly startled by her own sudden release of her pent up anger.

“…You’re mad because I warned him.” Wooshin stated.

“See? You’re assuming things again.” Jinhee crossed her arms and looked away.

“It’s a fact, not an assumption.” Wooshin heaved a tired sigh, and looked away as well. “What did you want to ask?”

_He’s dropping that topic just like that?_ Jinhee side-eyed the other. “That… Nevermind.”

“Did you find something?”

_Can he read my mind or something?_

“You’re easy to read. Just ask.”

Jinhee sighed in defeat. “It’s… Your books over there. In the shelf.”

“They belong to the nerd, not me.” Wooshin went straight to the point, much to Jinhee’s surprise. “He’s had them since middle school. Because he wants to get rid of me. But of course, that weakling can’t get rid of his mental shield. I am his shield. Back then I was close to burning them all, but then I thought I should read them. Instead of him getting rid of me, it’ll be me getting rid of him. In reality, only the strongest will survive.”

Jinhee hadn’t expected it to be that easy to get an explanation – he didn’t even hesitate and stutter one bit, as if it wasn’t a sensitive topic that could trigger a button.

So it poured out unexpectedly and caught Jinhee off guard, being unprepared.

“Why… do you want to get rid of each other?” Her voice trembled. “Can’t you both be one instead? You and Wooseok make one whole person, you complete each other. M-Maybe there are more of you that I haven’t discovered. If they do exist, do you want to get rid of them too? What if you get hurt while trying to kill a part of you?”

Wooshin’s gaze slowly shifted to Jinhee’s glassy brown eyes.

“I’m complete as my own self. Fine, let’s put it your way. Everyone has strengths and weaknesses. If you put me and him together as one person, he would be everything you’d call a weakness. I’m the strength. Everyone wants to keep their strength and get rid of their weakness. Therefore, he’s not needed. Is that simple enough for you?”

“You’re so annoying.” Jinhee sniffled and gave a weak punch on the other’s shoulder. “Nobody has no weaknesses. How are you going to learn to be better person if you don’t have them? Are you saying you’re already a perfect human being? Wooseok is not everything bad... He’s a sweetheart, I know he’s a good person. Just like how you are not everything bad, although most of the time you’re a complete jerk.”

“You’re just afraid he’ll get hurt. Not me,” Wooshin stated.

“Stop that. It’s stupid to get jealous of yourself.”

Instead of being angry in the way he usually would, Wooshin looked away and remained silent, his lips forming a small pout like a sulking little boy.

Jinhee sighed and bit her bottom lip in contemplation.

_This won’t do. Arguing with him won’t make him listen. I need to be softer on this kid._

Holding her breath in for no reasons, Jinhee brought her hand to Wooshin’s head and began to run her fingers softly through his damp hair.

The boy froze at the sudden display of affection.

_Come to think of it… I’ve hugged and comforted Wooseok before, but that’s not the case with Wooshin._

“You know, I’m trying to understand both of you,” Jinhee said. “Sometimes I think you’re not much different from the others. From me. When you meet a person for the first time, you get to know one face. As time goes by and you know more about them, you learn that they have other different _faces_ that you didn’t know before. When they do something that breaks their image in your eyes, you might think they’ve changed, but in fact it’s just their other face that was hidden before. The difference is, they can control which face to display. But you can’t. Because your _faces_ have control over themselves, and separate themselves from each other as distinct characters. It’s a simple difference, if you think about it. So I don’t want to see you as… someone _completely_ different. To be frank, there must be a reason why your _faces_ exist. Does anyone… know the reason?”

For a good minute, Wooshin’s unreadable dark eyes and Jinhee’s curious ones were locked on each other in suffocating silence. The ticking sound of the clock sounded louder than usual in Jinhee’s ears, and her chest began to feel so full as she waited for an answer.

And she finally released her breath when Wooshin shook his head.

“…One person should know, but doesn’t give a damn.”

_Is it your uncle?_

Jinhee couldn’t bring herself to ask that question out loud. Instead, she let herself took the mentally wounded boy’s head into her embrace.

“It’s okay.” She whispered. “When you feel safe enough, you can open up to the one you trust.”

Her thumb that was caressing his cheek eventually became wet with tears that wouldn’t stop slipping out the corners of his blank eyes. She was too afraid to see them, afraid that the sight of them would break her too. But even without seeing them, she failed to keep her heart in one piece. She held him closer to hide the streams of tears flowing down her own cheeks.

_Poor soul… You don’t have to face this alone. When you have no one, I’ll try my best to be there for you._

It was close to midnight when Wooshin managed to pull himself together and moved to the sleeping mat he had prepared on the floor. Embarrassed after crying so much, he turned off the bedside lamp and turned his back to the girl in his bed.

“Goodnight,” he mumbled.

“Sleep well. Have a nice dream.” Jinhee smiled at the boy’s back. At least he had let some emotions out; finally, something good for his mental health.

_Later that night, 3:15 AM…_

Being a light sleeper, Jinhee’s eyes cracked open wide feeling a sudden pressure against her body.

The first thing she found when she looked down was a mop of messy black hair, a head resting on her chest. And the next thing she felt was an arm holding her in a tight hug.

“GAH—!” Jinhee threw a hand over her mouth to muffle her scream. _What the hell??_

Pulling back slightly, she noticed another presence of something between their bodies – it was the same medium-sized stuffed fox as the one he had given to her.

_Did he… How did he get this back?_

But after a second look, she noticed a difference on it; there was a red bow between its ears. It was the female version.

_Huh… So this must be my fox’s girlfriend. Ah, I haven’t even named him._

“Mmm…”

A mumbling sound set Jinhee on alert.

“…Mommy.”

“…What?”

Jinhee tilted her head to see Wooshin’s face, unsure if she heard him correctly. His eyes were closed and his plump lips were slightly parted.

“Are you awake?” She whispered, and then whimpered and pulled her head back as the boy snuggled even closer and tightened the hug.

“S…Scared.” He mumbled again.

_He’s sleep-talking… Is this Wooshin? Or Wooseok? Or…?_

“It… hurts. Mommy… h-help me.”

Wooshin’s face crumpled and his body twitched in his sleep, as if he had just gotten hit by something. Faint sniffles and hushed breath began to slip out of his parted lips.

“Oh, oh no… Wooshin, wake up. It’s just a dream. Wake up, don’t cry.” Jinhee shook him and lightly tapped his wet cheek to wake him up, but to no avail. The sniffles eventually turned into sobs. “Wooshin. Wooseok. Whichever Woo it is, please wake up.”

“Don’t leave me… Don’t leave me.” The boy cried. The frail shaky voice that was a few octaves higher than Wooshin’s usual deep one tugged at Jinhee’s heartstrings, made her feel crushed inside.

“No, no, I’m not leaving. I’m here, it’s okay.” Jinhee held him tight and gave soothing rubs on his back, whispering comforting words in his ear.

It felt like forever, but eventually his tears stopped and he became still in her arms.

Letting out a shaky sigh, Jinhee wiped her own eye with the back of her hand, and rested her cheek on Wooshin’s head.

“I didn’t know… I’m sorry I didn’t know.” She muttered. “You’re hurt so bad.”

Wooshin’s chest rose and fell as his breath became steady, indicating that his nightmare had gone away.

But Jinhee remained wide awake in the dark.

The night went on just like that.


	5. Chapter 5

* * *

The morning air was filled with the pleasant smell of fried eggs and spam. The scent flew through the air all the way up towards the room upstairs, entering a boy’s nostrils, arousing him up from his slumber.

His beautiful pair of eyes fluttered open and blinked a few times, taking time to get his senses back to work.

_This smell…? Food? Is uncle home? But… Wait… He never cooks._

Suddenly he jerked up wide-eyed and sprang off his bed, scrambling out to the stairs and down to the kitchen.

“…C-Cha Jinhee??”

In the kitchen was a girl in his blue shirt and white shorts, with her long hair tied up into a loose bun, cheerfully humming while preparing two dishes of breakfast. Hearing her name being called, she turned her head and beamed at the boy gawking at the doorway.

“Oh, you’re awake! Good morning! You must be hungry, come eat with me.” Her dimples showed up as she grinned and waved her hand, motioning him to come to her. “You don’t mind me using your kitchen, right?”

“H-How… How did you get here? And cook here…?” The boy held his head that was beginning to pound. Everything was then spinning in his blurry sight.

“Oh?” Jinhee blinked. “Could it be… Is Wooseok back?”

“What happened? What…” Wooseok wobbled and collapsed forward.

Luckily, Jinhee was fast to rush to him and catch him before his body could slam against the floor.

“Oof, oof— Oh gosh, you’re not as light as you look. It must be those muscles.” She dragged the half-conscious boy across the floor and leaned him against the kitchen island. “Do you have any medicines? Can I get anything for you? No? Don’t pass out here, please. Let’s move, let’s just move to the living room.”

Jinhee slung Wooseok’s arm around her neck and helped him get up on his feet.

“You… You said muscles… D-Did you see something?” Wooseok croaked and winced while clutching on his head.

“Well,” Jinhee cracked an awkward laugh, “can’t say I didn’t see anything. No worries, it was just your… uhm… upper body. Yeah, let’s go.”

The two wobbled their way together to the living room, until Jinhee managed to lay Wooseok down in the sofa.

“Did I… do something bad?” Wooseok closed his eyes and panted softly.

“No, you didn’t. I’ll get you some water, okay? Wait here.” Jinhee hurried back to the kitchen to get a glass of water.

However, when she returned, Wooseok had lost consciousness.

“Oh, no. He’s not dying, is he?” Jinhee kneeled by the sofa and tried patting his cheek. “Wooseok. Wooseok, can you hear me? What do I do? Should I call an ambulance?” She placed the back of her hand on his forehead to feel his temperature. “Not a fever. Aish, what do I do??”

To her surprise, Wooseok’s hand moved up, placing his index finger on his lips.

“Y-You’re awake??”

“Sshh. So loud in the morning.”

Jinhee’s face dropped flat as the boy sat up, stretched his arms and let out a huge yawn.

“You almost gave me a heart attack! I never saw you switch alters before yesterday, you know? Wooseok looked like he was dying, but it was just you coming out. Ugh.” Jinhee huffed and rolled her eyes.

Ignoring her nagging, Wooshin got up and followed his nose to the kitchen. “Did you cook for me? How sweet. Don’t force me to propose to you sooner like this.”

“Good gracious, help me.” Jinhee faked a gag.

Wooshin continued Jinhee’s unfinished work by stacking up the toasts, eggs, and spam that she had prepared. After a quick garggle, he proceeded to stuff his face with the thick sandwich he made.

“Ohhh. So good.” Pulling a seductive face, he moaned and glided his tongue across his lips, glancing at Jinhee with his mischievous smiling eyes.

The girl was speechless.

“…Can you please pass out again?”

They ended up having their breakfast together in silence, with Wooshin constantly smiling to himself and Jinhee trying to ignore that.

While they were cleaning up the kitchen, Wooshin asked, “Did you buy all of this? I remember checking the kitchen last night and found no food.”

There was a new box of cereal, various kinds of noodles, a pack of white toast, some kinds of bread, and a bunch of snacks. In the fridge, there were also a big bottle of milk and other dairy products, some eggs, and chocolate, all neatly arranged.

Wooshin didn’t look too happy. “Why did you trouble yourself like this?”

“Ah, it was nothing.” Jinhee waved her hand and chuckled. “I asked Junho to bring me some clothes so I won’t have to go home wearing yours. I told him there was no food here and I was hungry, and later he came with all of this. I didn’t feel troubled at all.” She flashed an innocent grin.

“But you felt hungry.” Wooshin sighed and messed his already messy hair, exasperated with himself.

“Oh, it’s alright! There’s that whole bucket of ice cream, remember?” Jinhee giggled. “Sorry, I had to eat it.”

Wooshin side-eyed the shorter, clearly holding back a smile. “Thanks, Jinny.”

“You’re going to call me that too now? Should I let you?” Jinhee leaned closer and smiled teasingly. “Only the closest people call me that, because they know where that name came from.”

“I know where it came from.” Wooshin smirked. “Should I say it?”

Now, Jinhee was curious. “Really? Say it.”

“You mispronounced your own name when you were little. It was something funnier before, then it became Jinny. And now it’s just Jinhee.”

Jinhee’s face lost its color, getting caught off guard. _It’s… It’s true!_ “How did you know? Who told you?”

_It’s either Yeonwoo or Junho, but why would they tell him? Other than those two, only mom and dad know… and Seungwoo oppa. It can’t be them._

“Found out about it myself.” Wooshin winked and turned to walk away.

“Hey, wait! We’re not done talking here!”

Suddenly, Wooshin started to run, and by instinct Jinhee also ran to catch him. They ran to the living room, played cat and mouse around the coffee table, until Wooshin managed to escape and run towards the back of the house. Both of them couldn’t help but giggle like little kids.

As she reached out her hands to catch him, Jinhee’s focus was locked on Wooshin’s back and nowhere else – and so when she managed to grab a hold of his shirt, she beamed and exclaimed in victory without realizing where he was leading her to.

“HA! Got you!”

_SPLASH!_

“Mmmff!” Jinhee flailed her limbs around under the water, unable to gain control out of shock.

But then, a pair of hands grabbed her waist and pushed her up to the surface. She gasped for air and wiped the water off her face.

“You can’t swim?”

Hearing a familiar deep laugh made Jinhee swing her fist and smash it onto the arm holding her.

“Jerk! Of course I can swim, but you almost gave me a heart attack just now!” she placed her feet on Wooshin’s body under the water, and then kicked him for a push to swim away from him.

Wooshin laughed out loud before catching up with the sulking girl.

“Hey, come on. You said you wanted to swim. I filled the pool overnight.” Being the good swimmer he was, Wooshin dived in fast and appeared again in front of Jinhee with his naughty smile.

“Take that shirt off. Looks uncomfortable,” he said.

A hint of pink spread on Jinhee’s cheeks as she covered her chest with her arms. “Not a chance, you pervert.”

Wooshin raised an eyebrow. “If your bra and panties are the same shapes as bikinis, then why can’t you swim in them?” Upon saying that, he took off his shirt and tossed it towards the edge of the pool. “An exclusive view just for you.” He winked before swimming away to the other end of the pool.

“What even goes on in his head?” Jinhee pouted, secretly considering his logic. “Of course I can’t swim with him in my underwear. Right, not a chance.”

Suddenly Wooshin’s head popped out the water, right in front of her, shocking the life out of her. “Didn’t you just—Stop doing that!”

“Let’s have a race,” he suggested. “The one who loses has to take off a piece of their clothes.”

“And what good will it do for me? You taking off your pants is not something I look forward to!” Jinhee splashed the water on Wooshin’s face, making him chuckle. “Sheesh, your head must be full of garbage.”

“Come on, you know I’m innocent. Otherwise I would’ve done things to you last night.” Wooshin pulled on Jinhee’s sleeve.

_Oh, you sure did ‘things’ to me last night._ Jinhee rolled her eyes.

“And besides, it’s just us here. No one will see. Just me.” Wooshin took Jinhee’s hand and pulled her towards the edge of the pool, to get ready for the race he asked for. “Ready?”

“Ugh... Fine, just once.” _Glad I chose to wear my normal black underwear instead of the Minnie Mouse one. Taking off just the shorts should be fine,_ Jinhee thought.

“Okay!” The excited Wooshin pumped his fist in the air. “Get ready, one… Two… Go!”

Jinhee’s competitive self jumped out of nowhere as they launched themselves and scissored through the water with the same speed. The gap was so small, but Jinhee was milliseconds faster to tap the edge of the pool.

“I win! Woohoo!” Jinhee threw her fists in the air and did a funny dance. Smiling brightly, Wooshin pushed his hair back and wiped the water off his face.

_Wow, what a visual._ Jinhee blinked back to her senses and shook her head. _Now hold on, did I really just admire that face? Pfft, like his head isn’t big enough._

“I underestimated you,” Wooshin said as he took off his shorts and threw them away. “One more time.”

Jinhee tried not to look, she really did, but she couldn’t. _Damn, aren’t those thighs slimmer than mine? They look like chopsticks._

“One more time? Do you want to swim naked?” Jinhee pulled a disgusted face. “The second you take off your underwear, that’s when I’ll leave for good.”

Wooshin laughed. “Who says I’m going to lose?”

“But what if you lose again? Hm?” Jinhee asked.

“If I lose again, I’ll go and get a sleeveless shirt for you. More comfortable than that long sleeve. I’ve got swimming trunks too,” Wooshin offered.

“Hmm. Sounds good.” Jinhee crossed her arms and nodded. “Fine, one more round.”

And so, once again they raced to the other end. But this time it was different – Wooshin was twice as fast as before. As he dived in and rocketed past Jinhee under the water, his body glided and waved smoothly like a dolphin. Jinhee goggled at him in surprise before picking up her pace.

But when the gap between them grew smaller, something caught Jinhee’s attention. Something other than the unexpectedly perky butt in front of her face.

There were faint scars on the back of Wooshin’s bare thighs. One of the lines went from his outer thigh, all the way up to the part hidden under his briefs.

_H-How come he has scars there?? Did he get beaten up uncovered or something? Gosh, what in the world did he go through?_

With that distraction, the result of the race was obvious.

“Take them off.” Wooshin flashed a teasing smile and wiggled his eyebrows.

“A-Alright.” Still distracted, Jinhee slid the borrowed shorts off absentmindedly and put them on the edge of the pool. If it weren’t for the jumbled questions in her head, she would’ve turned red like a crab under Wooshin’s mischievous gaze.

“One more time.”

This time, the challenge came from Jinhee’s mouth. It was easy to tell that Wooshin was surprised and delighted at the same time.

_I just want to see those scars once again. It’ll be super awkward if I ask him to show me later._

Jinhee’s aim wasn’t to win anymore. _Screw it,_ she thought, _he’s not wrong saying that bras and panties are the same shapes as bikinis._

Swimming next to Wooshin, she slowed down a little so his legs were right by her head. Despite being underwater, she could see the scars clearer than before. A few lines were thicker than the others. They looked like strikes left by a stick and a whip.

_Poor child…_

All her life, Jinhee had never experienced nor witnessed any child abuse. Her parents had always made sure she and Junho grew up without any memories of violence in their lives. But seeing Wooshin’s scars, her own imagination took the role to show her what it could have looked like – how every strike hit his once flawless skin, the pained look on his face, and his cries for help – all based on what she had witnessed from his nightmare the night before.

She couldn’t keep herself from reaching out her hand and brushing her fingers against those scars.

_I want you to tell me about it… But it will be hard to ask you._

Just after she was sure Wooshin felt her touch, did Jinhee retract her hand and avert her gaze from his thighs. That way she had let him know that she was aware of those scars.

At that moment, Wooshin turned his head back and their eyes met.

He went up to the surface, and Jinhee followed suit. They had reached the edge – another win for Wooshin.

“Using the chance to touch me. Who’s the pervert now?” Wooshin looked away and smirked. “Take that shirt off, you lost.”

Hesitantly, Jinhee pulled the shirt up over her head and put it away. She untied her hair bun and let it fall, to cover as much skin as it could. It didn’t help much anyway.

“Will you… tell me about _it_?” Jinhee asked cautiously, afraid to trigger a button with the sensitive topic.

Wooshin heaved a long sigh. “Why do you want to know so much?” When his dark, intense gaze returned on her, Jinhee’s breath was caught in her throat. Slowly the distance between them grew smaller as he moved closer, until she was trapped between his arms, his body, and the wall of the pool. His warm breath that was blowing against the wet skin of her face made it harder for her to breathe – she wasn’t sure whether because she was scared, or nervous… or something else.

_Is he… mad?_

“You’re lucky, Cha Jinhee.” Wooshin tilted his head, a corner of his lips tugging up into a small, mysterious smile. “You’re lucky that you discovered me late… because the worst version of me has long gone. Even if you believe I’m the bad one, the truth is I’m not the monster in this body. The person you’re looking at now has learned to control himself. Otherwise, just imagine what would’ve happened to you.” He took a few strands of Jinhee’s hair between his fingers and played with it. “But still, it’s not always easy for me. Holding my own leash. So let’s be careful… shall we?”

Jinhee gulped and nodded. “I’m sorry if I crossed the line.”

“Don’t be scared of me. When the time comes, you can hold my leash. But for now…” Wooshin took Jinhee’s hand and placed it on his cheek. “Take a closer look of what you touch.”

Moving Jinhee’s hand, he began to trace the parts of his face with her fingers – above his temple, on his cheekbone, and on his cheek, next to the left corner of his lips.

“What do you see?” He asked.

“S…Scars.” Jinhee blinked back her tears. _He’s… letting me see and touch his wounds._

Wooshin brought her fingers further down, to his collarbone and his chest. He placed them on the back of his own hand and traced them along his knuckles. Then he turned around, showing her the biggest scar he had on his back that she had seen – yet there were also smaller, softer lines that she hadn’t noticed before. Jinhee let her fingers slide down the scarred bare skin, until Wooshin turned back around and caught her hand before she could go over his limit.

“I can’t show you more than that for now,” he said.

Jinhee shook her head. “Thank you. For trusting me that much.”

It came as a relief to her when a small genuine smile found its way to Wooshin’s lips, and became a shock when he pulled her into a hug and held her head on his shoulder.

_This—This doesn’t feel right, I’m not wearing a shirt!_ She gawked in horror. _Is he taking advantages now?_

“Don’t think of weird things. I’ve told you I’m innocent.” Wooshin chuckled and let go of her – hesitantly. He swam away and turned onto his back, floating like a piece of stick.

Jinhee’s face dropped into a pout. _Am I really that easy to read?_

She swam towards the other and began to splash a bunch of water at him.

“There’s no way you’re innocent! Take this!”

“Stop that.” Wooshin laughed, and eventually attacked back with bigger splashes. The girl squealed and shielded herself with her arms.

“Noooo! Stop!”

“I’m not stopping until you answer something!” Wooshin continued to splash although Jinhee was already gasping for air.

“Hurry and ask!” She said.

“Which one do you like more, chocolate or mint choco?”

“Why is that so important to you?? Agh—Alright, alright, I like chocolate!”

Wooshin stopped splashing and smiled cheekily.

“Chocolate and mint choco are just flavors, they don’t represent you and someone else!” Jinhee yelled.

Wooshin continued his splash attack.

“Aaahhhh stooop!!”

* * *

“Okay, so, when you see him, what are you going to do?”

“Um… Apologize?”

“Well… You don’t have to, but at least explain yourself.”

Jinhee and Wooseok were walking side by side towards a particular classroom, early on that Monday morning. They stopped outside the door, and Wooseok tightened his grips on his backpack straps.

“I’m afraid he’s angry at me.” He shifted on his feet nervously.

“Nah, he will understand. You were on good terms with him before, right?” Jinhee asked, answered with a nod.

Hiding her own nervousness, Jinhee poked her head into the classroom, and brightened up when her eyes met with the ones belonging to the person she was looking for.

“Oh, Jinhee!”

“Hi, Yohan!”

Yohan’s laughing fit ended instantly when he saw the girl at the doorway. He left the flock of students surrounding his desk and hurried to the door.

“Hey, is something wrong? It’s the first time you come here,” Yohan asked in concern. His pupils dilated fondly at the girl’s innocent dimpled smile.

“Not really, it’s just about last Friday. I think someone wants to clear things up.” Jinhee stepped aside, revealing the shy nerdy boy hiding behind her.

“H-Hey.” Wooseok lifted his chin and gave a nervous smile. Seeing that Yohan didn’t reciprocate the smile and was observing him meticulously with cautious eyes, Wooseok bowed his head again and stuttered, “I-I’m sorry… for what I did. I wasn’t aware of what was happening… I-I hope you understand w-what I mean.”

Recognizing the familiar nerdy behavior, Yohan let himself relax and smile at the smaller boy, his cold features turning warm and friendly. “I understand what you mean. It’s fine.” He gave Wooseok a quick bro hug with one arm and patted his back. “Honestly, though, I kept thinking about it. No, it’s not like that. What I mean is, I hadn’t spent enough time with you to be aware of that side of you. So, when you have time, should we hang out together? Just you and me.”

Wooseok stole nervous glances at Jinhee, looking terrified by the invitation. He remained silent and hoped Jinhee could read his situation.

“Aww, just the two of you? I thought it’d be great if we all could go out together, like when we went for ice cream. But with Wooseok this time,” Jinhee said. She wasn’t aware of Wooseok’s state, but her answer gave him a bit of relief.

“Oh, sure! That’d be fun.” Yohan perked up at the idea. “Then, we can go out together, and then at a different time I’ll have a guy time with Wooseok. How does that sound?”

Wooseok bowed his head deeper to hide his pained expression. Somehow, he believed the taller boy had another intention for inviting him out.

“Ahh, you want to get to know him more?” Jinhee asked. “Well, some quality time might be good for you two. Don’t you think so, Wooseok?”

_There’s no escape now,_ Wooseok thought.

So he lifted his head and answered with a hesitant nod.

Jinhee clapped and squealed in delight. “Great! If Wooseok doesn’t mind, then I’ll step aside. You guys should arrange your hangout plan, then!”


	6. Chapter 6

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I split chapter 2 & 3 into two chapters each, so the chapters wouldn't be too long. I've written the next 10 chapters for this story, but currently I'm researching further on Dissociative Identity Disorder so I won't portray the disorder incorrectly. I've discovered that there are DID movies that have led to misconception about DID in society, so I'll try not to do that too. Gonna post after revising some parts :>

* * *

“What coffee do you like?”

“Iced Americano.”

“Oh, we have the same favorite! Two large Iced Americano, please.”

Yohan handed his money to the young cashier girl along with a sweet smile, successfully turning her into a shy grinning mess. This boy was a regular at the coffee shop; most female employees knew him and the same drink he always ordered.

“P-Please let me pay mine.” Wooseok clutched his crumpled pocket money in his sweaty hands. He knew he couldn’t spend his uncle’s money carelessly, but letting someone else spend money on him wasn’t a better option to him either.

“I’ve told you, it’s on me. Keep that money, okay? Next time it’ll be on you.” Yohan took the money and shoved it into Wooseok’s pocket.

After picking up their drinks, the two boys went to an empty table for two by the window.

It was strange to Wooseok how Yohan seemed perfectly comfortable with their situation. He himself felt like he could die from the tension and awkwardness, which seemed to be a one-sided feeling, apparently.

“So, Wooseok.” Yohan took a sip of his iced coffee and leaned closer, rested his elbow on the table, and supported his chin up in his hand. His bright puppy eyes reflected the soft morning sunlight coming in through the window; they seemed cheerful and carefree, while in fact, they held so many questions about the boy across the table.

“H-Huh?” Wooseok took a sip as well, but unlike the other boy, he leaned back into his seat to keep a _safe_ distance and flew his gaze out the window. Having an eye-to-eye conversation wasn’t something he was capable of.

“I’m curious about something.” Yohan cocked his head to the side, trying to read the other boy’s expression. “Do you remember exactly how things happened? Or did Jinhee tell you how it happened?”

“She… She told me how it happened.” Wooseok’s voice cracked. He took another sip, cleared his throat, and fixed his big glasses that had slid down a little.

“You don’t have to be that nervous, you know.” Yohan laughed. “I’m not trying to interrogate you. You can ask things about me too.”

_Why are you trying to get close to me? What is your motive?_ Wooseok kept the questions in.

“So,” Yohan clasped his hands, “does that mean you don’t know why you did this and that? Or, you know… Maybe your actions still reflect your true thoughts and feelings.”

Wooseok’s silence gave Yohan the permission to elaborate his statement.

“When Hangyul teased you, you must have been angry inside, right?” Yohan pulled a funny angry face as an example. Wooseok dropped his head and held a small smile that Yohan didn’t fail to catch. “But instead of getting angry at him, you chased him around and begged him to stop. And then, your… other self came out. And you were able to punch him so hard. You saw me catch Jinhee, and you also got angry at me. Now, my point is, even though you don’t remember what you did, I think your other self actually acted based on your emotions. Like two different persons sharing one heart, but not always one mind and memory. Do I understand your situation correctly?”

Wooseok was taken aback by the explanation. Someone else, who wasn’t even close to him, was digging him and presenting the result of his analysis to him. For years he had been trying to study himself, and maybe find a way to cure himself, but he always ended up lost in his own maze. Perhaps, he did need a help from the outside of his head.

_Two different persons sharing one heart, but not always one mind and memory._

The description felt like a puzzle piece that clicked perfectly in his head.

“Mhmm…That’s right.” Wooseok nodded. “But I don’t know why he got mad at you too.”

Yohan let out a soft chuckle. “Maybe in fact you know, but you don’t want to know. Don’t you think you’re in denial?”

Wooseok wasn’t slow-minded. He understood what the other meant, but he chose not to respond.

“Although you’re split up, you’re still a guy. I’m a guy too, so I understand,” Yohan said. “I’ve been there before. Liking someone in silence.”

Wooseok snapped his head up and gaped at the other, having not expected him to open the card. “L-Liking… someone?” He stammered.

The slow blink of Yohan’s twinkling eyes and the soft smile on his lips only expressed one thing; _I genuinely understand, you don’t have to hide it._

“Wooseok, we’re not animals. Just because we’re after the same female, doesn’t mean we have to fight each other. I can say this sincerely because I was once in your position.”

Wooseok’s mouth opened and closed in panic, but no words came out, like a thief caught redhanded.

“S-Same female…? I-I don’t know w-which female you mean.”

Yohan broke into a dolphin laughter. “Don’t you understand what I just said? Stop playing dumb, it doesn’t suit your image! Seriously, I’m not going to fight you. I won’t tell anyone either. You can approach her your own way, but so can I. It’s all on her to choose which one between us. Or maybe someone else we don’t expect. Let’s do it like a man.”

Wooseok chewed on his bottom lip and stared at the other’s hand, hanging over the table, waiting for him to take it and seal the deal.

“…You’ll have to talk again to my other self.”

“Sure thing.”

And he finally took the hand in a firm handshake.

Yohan’s gummy smile spread from ear to ear.

“Kim Wooseok, let’s be friends.”

* * *

Four teenagers were flocking by the window of a snack shop, watching over a particular coffee shop across the street.

“They look like they’re on a date,” Seungyoun commented. “Because they’re sitting by the window, it looks like a scene in a romantic drama.”

“They’re laughing and smiling… I wonder what they’re talking about,” Yeonwoo said. “But it’s good to see that Wooseokie can open up to Yohan too. I thought they would splash coffee at each other.”

“You see that, Jinhee? Nothing to worry about,” Hangyul said while chewing on a piece of spicy rice cake. “But thanks for inviting me too. At least my little cousin can eat something nice while I babysit him.”

Sitting next to him was a fifteen-year-old boy who was even bigger than Hangyul himself, happily stuffing his mouth with various kinds of food on the table. Hangyul ruffled the boy’s soft hair and pinched his hamster-like chubby cheek.

“Are you enjoying it, Nam Dohyon?” Hangyul asked, “Should I buy you some more?”

“Mmm!” The cousin nodded. “Another portion of this, please.”

“But he’s had two portions of each food already!” Seungyoun gawked in awe.

Hangyul glared at him. “Let him be, he’s a growing baby. I won’t mind buying him three portions of each. Because it’s his mom’s money.” He mumbled the last sentence.

Meanwhile, Jinhee was too engrossed in spying the two boys across the street. She lowered her head slightly as they got up and left their table.

“Guys, they’re leaving,” she informed the others, and they all moved closer to the window. The coffee shop’s door was opened and two teenage boys walked out.

Laughing as if he was hanging out with an old friend, Yohan slung his arm around Wooseok’s shoulders and threw jokes that made the smaller boy have to constantly hold back his sheepish smile.

Jinhee couldn’t help but smile proudly at the sight.

“Aww, aren’t they cute?” Seungyoun cooed. “Yohanie looks like he’s taking his little brother out on a walk.”

“Eyy, earlier you said they were on a date, and now you say they’re brothers. Make up your mind,” Hangyul commented.

“They’re… brothers on a date?” Seungyoun laughed.

Jinhee chuckled along quietly while watching Yohan and Wooseok walk away.

But then something caught her off guard; suddenly Wooseok turned his head towards their direction, sensing that he was being watched.

Upon the eye contact, both he and Jinhee were equally surprised. Automatically Jinhee’s mind jump-started and worked hard to find excuses to tell the boy later.

And yet, a warm smile then found its way to Wooseok’s small lips as he secretively gave a thumb up, to let Jinhee know that everything was okay. He continued to walk away with his new friend.

“Ah… How nice to see them get along well.”

Jinhee heaved a contented sigh and smiled to herself, having no idea what kind of deal the boys had made about her.

* * *

_“Dear Wooshin,_

_I went out with Kim Yohan and had coffee together. He bought a large iced Americano for me. Long story short, he’s my friend now and we made a deal. I opened up to him because he could understand me even before I explained myself. He said you and I are like two different persons who share one heart, but not always one mind and memory. Since you got jealous when he touched Jinhee, I guess that means you like her. I’m too afraid to be honest with myself… but I think it’s true that I also feel something for her. But, unlike you, I won’t rush… I have no confidence that she would like me anyway, I’ll definitely lose to Yohan._

_Kim Yohan likes Jinhee too. Don’t be angry about it, please. He said we’re not animals, and just because we like the same girl, doesn’t mean we have to fight each other. Can you please let that sink in? Let’s be more mature and make it a friendly competition. If you really like Jinhee, please make her happy. You can try to make her fall for you, but please don’t stop Yohan from trying too. Because he won’t stop you either. He’s been in my position before. I’m sure he can be a good friend for you if you let him in. But if you play dirty and act rude towards him, I guess you have no confidence in yourself too after all._

_On a side note, thank you for not causing troubles lately. I’ve stopped running into angry people who call me Wooshin and tell me to apologize._

_This is the first time I talk to you like this. Hope you won’t throw away this letter before you finish reading it. You can leave letters like this too, if you want._

_-Kim Wooseok-“_

“Freaking nerd. Writing a long ass letter with that ugly ass handwriting and all.” Wooshin crumpled the paper he had found on his desk and tossed it into his drawer.

Well, at least he didn’t throw it into the trash.

“So, that moron agreed to let someone else steal his crush.” He snorted. “Why did he even agree when he was sure he would lose? Friendly competition my ass. He’s straight up dumb, I really need to get rid of him.”

_But if you play dirty and act rude towards him, I guess you have no confidence in yourself too after all._

“Tch.” Wooshin’s blood boiled recalling that particular mocking line in the letter. He stood in front of his mirror and shot a challenging look at his own reflection. “Fine. I’ll show you, nerd, I’ll win her my own way. But if I win her, she’ll belong to me only. You have no right to touch her, because you’re a loser who doesn’t even have the balls to give it a shot.”

Wooshin grabbed his phone and dialed a particular number, one that he had earned by snatching the owner’s phone and using it to call his own number. It had happened after the sleepover just a week before.

_“Hello? Who is this?”_ A cheerful feminine voice answered.

“Hey. Cha Jinhee. Didn’t I tell you to save my number?” Wooshin pouted.

_“Ahh, so it’s you, Mr. Wooshin. I thought it could be the other Woo’s.”_ Jinhee giggled on the other end of the line.

Wooshin’s pout turned into a smile. He liked that giggle. “I’ll switch to video call in a minute. Get ready.”

_“Huh? Wait, I’m—”_

Wooshin ended the call, hurried to his bathroom, and fixed his messy bed hair in front of the mirror. After Wooseok had returned from his _meeting_ with Yohan that morning, and after writing the letter, he had spent the whole day taking a nap until it was dark outside. It was then Wooshin’s turn to come out, and his face was still on zombie mode.

“Nevermind, I look sexy like this.” He gave up fixing his hair, returned to his bed, and leaned against the pillows, making sure his pose was sexy enough before making a video call.

While waiting for Jinhee to pick it up, he checked himself out on the screen and smirked noticing that the upper half of his chest was showing. His old white shirt was too loose to cover that area without constantly being pulled up.

“Damn, I’m so freaking hot. She’s so lucky to get this sexy view.”

Suddenly a familiar small face popped out on the screen, and Wooshin’s heart skipped a beat. Her hair was tied up into a long, thick ponytail, and some strands of hair were left framing her face naturally. Her round eyes had their usual innocent glint and her lips were moist pink from her lip balm. She was wearing a pastel blue thin sweatshirt, with a hood that had a cartoon penguin’s face on it.

_So damn cute, it’s annoying._ Wooshin thought.

“Next time please tell me at least ten minutes before, not one minute before,” Jinhee complained. The screen showed her moving around in her home, leaving a room and then entering her own bedroom. A sound of the door being locked could be heard before she moved to sit in her bed.

“Show me your room,” Wooshin said.

Jinhee turned her phone 360 degrees slowly to show her room. Most stuff in it were in soft pink, purple, and white. The wood flooring was in light shades of brown, and the white wallpapers had a galaxy theme, with small pictures of planets and stars in pastel colors. She had many light garlands decorating her room.

“So girly,” Wooshin commented.

“Because I’m a girl,” Jinhee said matter-of-factly.

“When can I go there? Should I go there now? I wanna sleep in your bed too.” Wooshin shot a drowsy smile.

“From that voice and that face, I’m pretty sure you’ve just woken up. Also, don’t you need to fix your shirt? It’s kinda showing too much from that angle,” Jinhee said.

“Showing what? Don’t you like what you see?” Instead of pulling his shirt up to cover his chest, he tugged the loose collar further down, making Jinhee yelp at the sight she got.

“Oh gosh, oh no, I saw your chocolate chip.” She looked away and shielded her face with her hand.

Wooshin’s laugh exploded. “Chocolate chip? Hey, it’s not like you haven’t seen my body before.”

“Don’t make it sound so wrong! Have you fixed your shirt?” Jinhee still refused to look at the screen.

Wooshin pulled his shirt up _a little,_ just enough to cover his exposed nipple. “I have.”

“You’re shameless.” Jinhee stuck her tongue out mockingly. “Anyways… Why video call all of a sudden? Did you want to tell something important?”

“Can’t I call for no important reasons?” Wooshin raised an eyebrow.

“That’s not what I’m saying. Just that, well… It’s just kind of… unusual? Anyways.” Jinhee grabbed something laid next to her and brought it up to the screen. “Look, it’s your foxy. How could you separate him from his girlfriend? He’s been sad. You’d better let him see her now!”

Jinhee made an angry face that came out adorable instead in Wooshin’s eyes.

“What girlfriend?” Wooshin slid off his bed lazily and went digging through his old toys. “You mean this fella?” He pulled out a similar stuffed fox that was hidden under a big blue teddy bear. The fox was supposed to be a female, judging from its longer eyelashes and the red bow on its head.

“Yes, her! Aww, the foxy couple finally reunite through a video call. What a modern generation they live in.” Jinhee pressed her fox’s snout on the screen multiple times while making smooching sounds. “Come on! Bring her close and let them kiss.”

Instead of the female fox, a pair of moist lips came and entirely covered the whole screen with a lingering smooching sound. Jinhee squealed and dropped her phone out of surprise and disgust.

“Ugh, ew, ow.” She shuddered, cringed hard, and slapped her own cheeks. “What did I do in my past life to deserve this God-forsaken level of cheesiness?”

Wooshin pouted, upset with the reaction. “My sexy lips don’t deserve that ungrateful behavior.”

“Excuse me? Go ahead and kiss yourself if you’re really that grateful for them.” Jinhee rolled her eyes when Wooshin actually kissed his own wrist, and then pressed his wrist on his cheek. “Wow, right now I’m witnessing narcissism at its ultimate mightiest level. This should be in the Guiness Book of World Records.”

Wooshin chuckled. He chose to ignore her sarcasm and change the topic. “What did you name that thing?”

“Woo.” Jinhee flashed an innocent smile.

“I thought you could be more creative than that,” Wooshin said.

“What’s your fox’s name, though?” Jinhee asked.

Wooshin looked at the stuffed fox in his hand. “It doesn’t have a name.”

“Then, I’d call it Yeo. So if you combine their names together, it will be Yeou.” And yeou means _fox_ in Korean _._

Wooshin smiled, impressed with the other’s wit. “Okay. They’re Yeo and Woo.”

“Yay! Finally the naming task is complete.” Jinhee clapped and giggled.

“Hey.” Wooshin’s tone dropped low and deep when something crossed his mind. “Have you had video calls like this with boys before?”

“Hm? Of course. Why?”

Wooshin wasn’t pleased with the answer. He had expected a no. Trying not to look upset, he asked, “With whom?”

Jinhee tapped her chin while she tried to recall. “Hmm… With Junho a few times, also with a friend in middle school, and recently with Seungyoun. Ah, wait… Why do I have to tell you? How nosy!”

“Seungyoun?” _Not Kim Yohan, but that dumb, loud, giggly, walking giant stereo speaker?_ This time, Wooshin couldn’t hide the irritation on his face. “Why him?”

“Eyy… Are you jealous?” Jinhee teased.

“N-No.” Wooshin snorted and pouted. “Why would I be jealous?”

“Don’t worry, I’m not gonna steal him. Even though you like to hit him and kick him in the crotch, I know you beat him out of love.” Jinhee’s laugh was bright and bubbly.

“Heck no freaking way. Do you really see me that low?” Wooshin muttered, genuinely pissed. “Tell me why him.”

“Aish, you’re no fun.” Jinhee’s laugh stopped and turned into a pout. “It was just a friendly interaction, alright? I’m sure he has video calls with a bunch of other friends too, you know he’s like that. He would even call you too, if only you let him. He has your number from Wooseok but he knows the almighty Wooshin wouldn’t like to get a call from him. Or from anyone in general. So that’s why it’s just weird that I’m having a video call with you. It feels funny, you know?”

Silence fell upon them.

“I would like to get calls from you,” Wooshin said.

“Aish! I’m serious, Kim Wooshin.” Jinhee glared.

“I’m serious too.”

Wooshin brought his phone closer so that only his face filled the screen. That face seemed calm and composed, but below the screen, his hand had moved to the left part of his chest. He felt full there, like there was a balloon inside that was growing bigger and bigger each passing second, pushing against his ribcage and soon going to burst.

It was something he had never felt before. And he hated how it felt.

Jinhee looked away and scratched her nape awkwardly. “A-Alright. If that’s what you want. Maybe I’ll get used to this.”

_I miss you._ Wooshin sucked in a deep breath, and exhaled a long, shaky sigh.

_Bang! Bang! Bang!_

Sudden loud banging sound on his door made Wooshin jerk up to a straight sitting position – the exact same reaction as Jinhee’s. The sound was so loud that she could hear it like it was inside her own house.

“W-What’s that sound? Wooshin?” Jinhee asked in horror.

The boy’s eyes looked petrified.

“I have to go. I’ll see you tomorrow,” he whispered.

“Wait, Wooshin! What—”

“Don’t worry about me.” Wooshin ended the call.

_Bang! Bang! Bang!_

“Wake up, you lazy ungrateful brat!” A man yelled behind the door.

Wooshin hid his phone under the pillow and took a deep breath before opening the door.

“Father, I—Aahhh!”


	7. Chapter 7

* * *

Jinhee had turned into a panda overnight. There were dark circles below her eyes.

“Noona, please stop crying.” Junho sighed. In front of him was a big lump covered in a pink blanket. “Let’s try calling him one more time. If he doesn’t answer again, I’ll take you to his house.”

“But I’ve called him 101 times since last night. If I call him again, it will be 102 times,” Jinhee mumbled and sniffled. “Something bad must’ve happened to him. It must be his uncle. If we go there, won’t we get killed?”

“We can call the police if you want,” Junho said. If he had to be honest, though, he believed it wasn’t necessary. Somehow he had this belief that his devilish senior could save his own ass from whatever situation it was.

“I think we should,” the lump mewled.

Junho scratched his head, feeling uneasy that his sister agreed to his thoughtless suggestion. “Ah, actually… I think I’ll go there and check on him for you, noona.”

“No, you can’t go there alone—”

_Ding! Dong!_

The cover was thrown open right away and Jinhee scrambled off her bed at the sound of the bell. Her feet got tangled with the blanket in the process, causing her to trip and slam hard against the floor.

“Noona!!” Junho shrieked.

“I’m okay!” The older sibling got up and dashed all the way down to the gate.

Upon the sight of her guests, she let out a sharp startled gasp.

It was Seungyoun, who was trying to keep another boy up on his feet. The other boy had his head down hiding his face, and his arm slung around Seungyoun’s neck for support. He was wearing a dirty, loose old white shirt that Jinhee had seen the night before.

“W-Wooshin!”

Jinhee didn’t hold back from throwing herself at the worn out boy and squeezing him in a tight hug. She wobbled back and forth as Wooshin’s weight was transferred from Seungyoun onto her.

“What happened to you??” Jinhee wanted to look at the boy’s face, but was afraid he’d fall right away if she pulled back. His vulnerable state that she wasn’t familiar with pushed her to the verge of tears.

“I found him on the street,” Seungyoun said. The tall teenager looked and sounded like a punished puppy. “I was on the way back from school after the soccer club meeting. I stopped by a convenience store to buy some stuff, and when I came out, by chance I saw him in an alley next to that store. It was dark there and he was sleeping on the ground. I offered to take him home, but he told me to take him here instead.”

“But we had a video call last night… Wooshin, did you run away from home?” Jinhee tightened her arms around Wooshin’s swaying weak body that could barely support itself. “It’s okay, let’s get in. Seungyoun, you wanna come in?”

“Ah, I’d like to, but I need to hurry and bring these to my mom.” He showed the bags in his hand and shot an apologetic look. “Guests are coming today. Ah… I’m really sorry I can’t help much.”

“It’s okay, you’ve helped so much, really! Thank you for taking him here while you’re in a rush.” Jinhee gave a reassuring thankful smile. “You can go now.”

Seungyoun left hesitantly, and Junho came to help his sister carry Wooshin in.

“Oh my God! What happened to the sweetheart??” The mother of the family rushed from the kitchen when she saw a glimpse of the three teenagers.

“We’re not sure yet, but can he stay in the guest room?” Jinhee pleaded through her puppy eyes.

“Of course, of course! He looks dying, hurry and take care of him!” The mother waved her hands telling her kids to move. “Junho, clean him up and lend him your clothes! I will prepare food for him, you kids wait in the room!”

Just after they had laid him down in bed could they see the state Wooshin’s face was in. His left cheekbone and his left eye were bruised, and there was dried blood in the corner of his pale lips. Jinhee could no longer hold back her tears.

“Wait here, noona, I’ll go get some stuff to clean him up.” Junho hurried and left the room.

“What happened? Was it your uncle?” Jinhee leaned down and brushed Wooshin’s bangs up softly to see his whole pale face. His eyes and lips remained shut, but his weak hand took Jinhee’s fingers in a loose grip. “You _must_ tell me everything. You hear me?”

Junho came back barging in with some clean clothes and a first aid box.

“This sunbaenim likes to bully me sometimes, but seeing him like this makes me sad.” Junho began to sniffle as he prepared some cotton to clean the wound. “Ah, we should check if there are wounds on his body too. But… You have to close your eyes, noona.”

“No need, I’ve seen—” Jinhee paused and covered her mouth. “I-I mean, I’ve seen you change clothes, it won’t be much different with him. I-It’s nothing if it’s just the upper body.”

“Ah, okay.” Oblivious to his panicking sister, Junho proceeded to lift Wooshin’s body slightly and take his shirt off. After checking the front part, he turned the body to see the back.

“Oh… N-Noona, he has lots of scars.” Junho looked at his senior with wide eyes. “No fresh wounds, but lots of old scars.”

“R-Really??” Jinhee pretended to be shocked.

“I think… I think it has something to do with his…” Junho whispered the last words, “mental disorder.”

“Yeah, that must be it.” Jinhee nodded. “Later, when he wakes up, I’ll talk to him about this.”

“Don’t rush him, noona. Don’t force him if he can’t talk about it yet,” the brother said. “It must be something traumatizing that’s hard to talk about.”

“…You’re right.” The older agreed.

Junho began to clean Wooshin’s body and face with a clean towel and some water in a plastic wash basin. Done with cleaning, the siblings worked together to treat the wounds in the gentlest way they could.

“Noona, turn around. I’m going to change his dirty pants,” Junho said. The older did as he said, while wondering if Junho would notice the scars on Wooshin’s thighs too.

“Oh my God, he really has a lot of scars,” Junho muttered. “Dad hit my butt once when I broke grandma’s vase, but Wooshin sunbaenim must have had his butt beaten up in a really _bad_ way.”

“Are you looking at his butt?” Jinhee couln’t keep her curiosity. “That’s not necessary, Junho, just hurry and change his pants. You don’t need to touch his underwear too.”

“I-I’m not looking at it! It’s just that he has scars even under his underwear lines, so he must have them on his butt too,” Junho said. “But noona, even though he’s skinny, his butt isn’t flat. It looks nice.”

“Aish, stop talking about it.” Jinhee pinched the bridge of her nose, her ears turning red out of embarrassment. _Yeah, indeed, it looks nice. I’ve seen it up close. I don’t need to recall it, do I?_

When she turned around, Wooshin was already dressed in a clean red T-shirt and grey shorts. The shirt was too big on him, since Junho had broad shoulders – it made him look even smaller and fragile.

“Get well soon, sunbaenim.” Junho pulled the cover up and tucked the older boy in. “I wish we could be closer so I could call you hyung instead.”

Jinhee sighed and looked at Wooshin’s beaten up face. His bruised eye was then covered by a cotton pad like a pirate.

_Thank goodness Seungyoun found you._ _At least you’re safe here for now._

“Kids, is he awake?” Their mother poked her head in. “I’ve made soup and hot tea for him.”

Jinhee turned and gave her mother a sincere thankful smile. “Thank you so much, mom. I’ll take them, maybe he’ll wake up soon.” She took the tray in her mother’s hands and set it down on the nightstand. Even though the bowl was covered by a lid, the soup’s delicious aroma quickly filled the air in the room.

“Ah, I want that soup too.” Junho patted his rumbling belly. “Noona, is there anything else I can do?”

“No, you can go and have lunch.” Jinhee chuckled and caressed the younger’s head. “Thank you, brother.”

Junho answered with an adorable eye smile before leaving the room like a hungry puppy.

As soon as the door closed, Wooshin’s right eye fluttered open and shifted to the other’s concerned face.

“…You were awake the whole time?” Jinhee asked.

The boy shut his eye again, his head nodded weakly, and his chapped lips formed a small smile.

“Argh! You made me worried to death!” Jinhee gave a weak punch on the other’s arm.

“Sshh.” Wooshin placed his index finger on his lips, telling her to be quiet so that no one would come.

Jinhee grabbed the mug of tea in the tray and helped Wooshin drink with a straw. She pouted at him for a good minute in silence.

But when Wooshin held his hand out to her and patted his chest, Jinhee let herself lay her head on his chest, as he asked for.

“I didn’t know I could be worried about you to that extent.” She sniffled.

“I’m sorry.” Wooshin’s voice came out in a raspy whisper. He laid his hand on the other’s head, closed his unwounded eye, and heaved a deep sigh.

In that comfortable silence, he wondered if she could hear his heart beating like crazy.

On the other hand, Jinhee had fallen silent as she listened to the loud thuds against her ear. She was drawing circles with her index finger on the toned chest, absentminded, not really aware of what she was doing.

It was just that new questions had arisen in her mind, and they made her feel kind of lost.

“I’ll wait until you can tell me about it,” she murmured. “I’m not… asking for your leash. It takes a lot of trust, right? You’ve let me take a closer look before. And touch you too. Now, how to say this… I’m… I’m waiting for you to let me _hold_ you. When you’re ready, please come to me.”

“Would you… let me stay?” Wooshin croaked. “Please. I’m not… I’m not the strongest.”

Jinhee lifted her head and found a bead of tear rolling down Wooshin’s cheek. That time, she failed to catch what he meant – a hint that he slipped out of frustration.

She pulled him up and held his body in her embrace, letting him lean his weight on her. That way he didn’t have to be embarrassed for letting her see his tears.

“I’m sure my parents will let you stay. But… Will you let them know your problem?” Jinhee asked. She caressed the boy’s hair and his back in a gentle, soothing way that made him melt into her hug, silently allowing his buried emotions to flow out like a slow, steady stream. “I suppose, the more they understand, the longer they’ll keep you safe.”

Wooshin nodded right away, much to Jinhee’s surprise. “K-Keep me safe. I will tell.”

Jinhee pulled back and held the other’s pale cheeks in her hands. His uncovered eye was blank, glimmering with tears.

“You can take your time.” Jinhee wiped the trails of tears away with her thumbs, offering a soft, sad smile in attempt to ease up. “I don’t… I don’t want to hurt you and push you to let it out.”

Wooshin’s frail fingers crawled up the hand on his cheek, delicately wrapping around the slender wrist. He brought the hand to his lips for a gentle, lingering kiss, and then placed it on his beating heart as he gazed deeply into her eyes – not an intense, confident gaze, but a sad, helpless, affectionate one.

Jinhee’s breath was caught in her throat feeling her own heart jump upon the kiss and the eye contact. Her chocolate brown eyes blinked in pure innocence, and her pinkish lips parted forming a small circle, as her mind tried to fathom what was going on down in her chest.

But then, as if a switch was flicked in her head, her features lit up at once, warm as the sunlight seeping in through the see-through curtain.

“A-Ah, my mom cooked some soup for you. I-It’s really delicious!” Jinhee’s bright, crisp, yet awkward laugh rang in her own ears along with the thumping of her heartbeat. She retracted her hand from Wooshin’s and proceeded to prepare the food for him in a clumsy manner.

“Feed me?”

At last, a smile managed to crawl back across Wooshin’s lips, as he was aware of the state the girl was in. But instead of a teasing smile, it was more of a fond, loving one.

“As far as I can see, your hands are functioning perfectly fine. Are you using this chance to get spoiled?” Jinhee stuck her tongue out mockingly. It made Wooshin’s closed-lip smile stretch even wider into an open one, showing his nice white teeth that were rarely seen.

“It will taste better if you feed me,” said the boy, already back on his cheeky mode.

“Aish… Even at times like this, your corny ass is still acting up.” Despite what she said, though, Jinhee couldn’t hide the smile playing on her lips. She grabbed the bowl and shoved a spoon of soup into Wooshin’s waiting open mouth.

After spending the whole night worrying about him, she couldn’t say that she didn’t feel so relieved to hear his flirty line again.

“This is what I call _food_.” Wooshin’s eyes curved and smiled adorably as he covered his full mouth with the back of his hand. He looked emotional.

_Ah, hasn’t he been eating well?_ Jinhee wondered. _Did he run out of food again?_

Not wanting his mood to go back down, Jinhee worked her mind to come up with a witty line.

“Hmm… Which one that you call _food_?” Cringing inside, Jinhee summoned all the bits of cuteness she had; she cocked her head to the side and showed off her best cheeky smile, put her index finger on her dimple while her other hand held the bowl of soup next to her face. She pointed at herself, and then the bowl, and then back at herself all the while her grin remained plastered on her face.

Wooshin’s eyes grew as big as in Wooseok mode and his mouth fell open exposing the food inside.

And his laugh boomed to the point that he had to clutch his shaking belly.

“What? Do I have to choose between the soup and you?” he wiped the water brimming in his eye out of laughter. Jinhee’s smile faltered slowly into a pout.

“Pfft… My dignity is gone, but at least I made you laugh.” She shoved another spoon of soup into Wooshin’s mouth to shut him up.

The boy continued to cackle mischievously with his full cheeks. Jinhee glared at him and then pulled a funny mocking face mimicking his laugh.

“Stop laughing.” She deadpanned, and yelped when Wooshin’s hand landed on top of her head. The boy smirked.

“You’re the food. You look appetizing, I’d eat you if I could.”

“…D-Don’t say things like that, it’s embarrassing!”

* * *

It was Tuesday, the third day of Wooshin’s stay at Jinhee’s house. It was also the second day he skipped school, both because of his wounded face and not having all his school stuff with him – his uniform, his bag, and his books.

Instead of going to school, to reciprocate the nice treatment from Jinhee’s family, he offered a hand to do the chores and take care of the house. The mother was more than delighted to have him around, even though he couldn’t bring himself to tell them his problem yet.

“Aigoo, I wish we could permanently have this sweetheart around! It makes me happy thinking of having a nice and helpful son-in-law in this house. What do you think, Jinny?” she had sent an obvious code on the second day, while the whole family was having a fun dinner together, which Jinhee had responded to with an embarrassed yell and a coughing fit after choking on her food.

“Don’t say things like that, mom, it’s embarrassing!”

It might be just a good coincidence, or it could be that it was under Wooshin’s control, but he managed to keep Wooseok hidden for three days straight. Or maybe, it was Wooseok who was hiding and refusing to come out after what had happened to him – that was what Wooshin had told Jinhee, calling his original self a coward.

While Wooshin was making moves and acting like a good boy to win the heart of Jinhee’s mother, Jinhee found herself unable to focus on anything at school. The seat next to her was temporarily occupied by Yeonwoo, while Hangyul had moved to sit next to Seungyoun, so that there would be no empty spaces left around her.

But still, the other three teenagers caught her zoning out every so often.

“That little flea really makes things hard, huh?” Hangyul remarked, when school was over and they were leaving their classroom. “He annoys the crap out of everyone when he’s around, and makes people miss him when he’s gone.”

“Yeah, especially for _this_ friend.” Yeonwoo giggled and nudged Jinhee with her elbow.

“I don’t miss him.” Jinhee snorted and pouted. The other three knew it was an obvious lie.

“I think we should do something to get him back to school,” Seungyoun suggested. “He needs to get his stuff from his uncle’s house. Should we sneak in and help him? After he gets everything he needs, he can go back to Jinhee’s place and stay there even longer.”

“Yeah, we can totally sneak in like ninjas. There won’t be CCTVs or neighbors watching at all. The uncle will stay asleep like a baby even when Seungyoun knocks over stuff around that house,” Hangyul said sarcastically.

“Hey, I’m not that clumsy,” Seungyoun complained.

_But, Seungyoun’s got a point. Wooshin needs to get his stuff soon if we don’t want him to be our maid or mom’s pet at home,_ Jinhee thought.

“I’ll ask him about having CCTVs,” Jinhee cut the boys’ bickering. “It’ll be better to sneak in during the day, when his uncle is away. But we’ll have to find a way to break in if the doors are locked. If you ask me, though, I think it’s likely that he doesn’t lock them. Wooshin told me once that he takes care of the house alone. It’s become a habit that his uncle doesn’t care enough to do anything helpful around the house.”

“That old man, my fellas, is the epitome of an old crusty ass,” Hangyul said. “I’m surprised he hasn’t made Wooshin wear a maid outfit. Or has he? Because he’d look pretty in that.”

“Ha, I know where your mind is flying to!” Seungyoun pointed an accusing finger at the other boy. “To the gutter!”

“No, clown, _your_ brain is already floating in the gutter with a red balloon.” Hangyul pointed back. “Just because I said he’d look pretty in a maid outfit, doesn’t mean I automatically think of your favorite Japanese porn.”

“W-What—I don’t even watch them!” Seungyoun panicked.

“Heh, all men do is lie.” Hangyul shrugged.

Seungyoun gawked. “But—But you’re also a guy! Why would you talk bad about your own kind??”

“It’s a humiliation to be put in the same category as you.” Hangyul winked.

Jinhee wiped her face and sighed into her palm. Yeonwoo gave her an understanding pat on the shoulder and shot an apologetic look.

“These dumb guys won’t be any use,” Yeonwoo said, while the boys went further with their absurd, playful arguments. “You should talk to Wooshin first, about this plan. Call me later if you need any help, okay?”

Jinhee thanked her best friend with a helpless smile and a hug.

Later, when Jinhee returned home and entered her room all exhausted, she was greeted by a peculiar scene that made her think she had probably fallen asleep on the bus and was still in her dream.

Junho and Wooshin were in her bed, lying on their sides, in a pose that made it look like Junho was forcing the older boy to stay still in his backhug.

“…What’s happening?”

Upon Jinhee’s question, Wooshin’s pupils dilated at the sight of her and his body froze in Junho’s arms, making the younger look at him in confusion.

“Um.” Jinhee crossed her arms and tapped her foot, waiting for an answer.

Exactly ten seconds later, as if he was just switched back on, the older boy gasped and backed away from the younger until he fell off the bed. He scurried away to the corner of the room and pressed his back flat on the wall, his chest rising and falling aggressively. His face looked as if he had just woken up in a haunted house.

“W-Where am I?” He stammered, eyes wide as saucers. “Why—Why was he hugging me?”

“Ah… Wooseok?” Jinhee came to realization. _Oh no, this isn’t good. I have to explain everything that happened to him._

“Noona—I-I wasn’t hugging him!” Junho looked at his sister with equally wide eyes, his finger pointing at the older boy accussingly. “He barged into my room and stole my phone, so I chased him around and ended up here! He was acting like a naughty little kid, it really wasn’t what it looked like!”

Jinhee shifted her gaze to Wooseok, who still had the look of horror on his small face. He searched his pockets with trembling hands, and in result drew out a phone that clearly didn’t belong to him – his phone had been left back at his uncle’s house.

“That’s my phone!” Junho rushed off the bed and went to retrieve his phone from the other boy.

“I-I-I’m so sorry, I don’t know w-why—" Wooseok curled into a sad ball and blinked multiple times, fighting back the tears in his eyes.

“Oh, no, no.” Jinhee rushed to Wooseok and comforted him with light pats on his back.

“I’m so sorry, I didn’t mean to steal. I’m not that kind of person.” Wooseok hid his face in his palms, afraid the girl would hate him for the little crime he had done.

“It’s okay, Wooseok. We know it wasn’t you. Don’t be scared now, you’re in my room.” In a gentle way, Jinhee tried to break him out of the curling position and make him look at her. His lips were quivering, eyes round and shiny like chocolate balls, shaking frantically as images began to surface and flash in his blurry sight.

“I… I ran away.” His voice came out as a horrified whisper.

The siblings looked at each other, stupefied.

“You remember?” Jinhee gasped as she came to realization. “Wait… Was it _you_ who ran away? Not Wooshin?”

Wooseok pulled his knees back to his chest and tugged on his own hair, squeezing his eyes shut as if there were loud noises in his head.

“I couldn’t… I couldn’t take it. I’m sorry,” he whimpered.

“No, no, don’t apologize.” Jinhee let herself wrap her arms around Wooseok, and Junho followed suit. “You’re safe now, it’s been three days you’re here. Even my parents have come to like you too.”

Wooseok lifted his head, looking startled. “Three… days?”

The siblings ended up telling him how things had happened in an uncoordinated manner, forgetting some parts and jumping back and fast forwarding, puzzling the poor boy even further. But thanks to his high intelligence, he still managed to arrange the pieces into a chronological story in his mind, and the whole picture didn’t look as bad as he had imagined.

But there was one thing he feared the most.

“My uncle… Has he searched for me?” He asked, which the siblings answered with a shake of their heads.

“We haven’t heard anything about a lost person,” Junho said.

“He’s going to kill me if he finds me,” Wooseok murmured to himself.

“Then, he’s not going to find you.” Jinhee’s statement was full of determination. “Look, Wooseok, you’re not legal age yet. If he hurts you, he can get in trouble for that. We just have to report him.”

“No, please.” Wooseok begged, catching Jinhee’s wrists as to stop her just to release them right after, as if there was a spark of electric shock upon the contact. “It can’t happen. H-He’s been my father too, he’s paid for my needs. I can’t make my parents worry like this. I always tell them that I’m happy here, they… they can’t find out that I’ve been lying to them. Please let my uncle be.”

Wooseok’s frustration was then transferred to Jinhee, giving her a strong urge to rip her hair off. “But you can’t continue living like this! How long are you going to put up with him? Shouldn’t you be honest for good?”

“Noona, calm down.” Junho held his sister’s shoulder. “Maybe mom and dad would know what to do. Should we tell them now?”

Wooseok seemed terrified by the idea of spilling his story to _outsiders_. Wooshin might have gotten along with the family, but it was a whole different case for Wooseok – he didn’t even know what Jinhee’s parents looked like.

But Wooshin had made a promise to open up to them, for they had put a shelter over his head when he had had nowhere to go. That promise was then Wooseok’s responsibility too, because just like his alter, he couldn’t bring himself to think of returning “home” soon.

“Do they know about my… disorder?” Wooseok asked. His building anxiety sent a rush of adrenaline through his veins, resounding his palpitating heartbeat in his own ears. It was going to be the very first time he’d let his guard down and open his door that had been locked for years.

Jinhee shook her head. “They don’t know yet. It’s okay if you don’t want them to know about it now, but… just like earlier, if any of your hidden alters shows up when my parents are around, we’ll have to explain to them. It’s just that… I’m concerned about this. If it actually happens, would you… introduce _all_ of your alters to us? So my parents will know what to anticipate, and won’t worry about things that won’t happen.”

Wooseok had begun to pant softly in a mild panic attack, just from imagining all possible reactions he’d receive. He could almost hear vague voices in the back of his head, laughing at him, mocking him for what he was. Like stepping in an old quicksand that once had caught his feet and swallowed him whole, he was petrified; he was struggling and fighting so hard to pull himself out of the memories, but instead he was sucked in deeper and faster. His scream was caught in his throat. He couldn’t let his voice out and beg for help.

_Help me… Please, save me! Please!_

“Wooseok!”

A pair of arms that caught him came as his unexpected savior, pulling him out of that raging, hungry quicksand. Just then he realized that his soft pant had intensified into heavy wheezing and sharp intakes of oxygen that made it seem like he was going into cardiac arrest.

His panic attack relented, his wheezing stopped, and he fell silent as he caught the sound of quiet sobs next to his ear. Jinhee’s head was rested on his shoulder, and her arms were firmly wrapped around his body. Behind her, Junho was squirming restlessly on his knees, worried yet unsure how to help.

“I’m so sorry,” Jinhee said through her sobs. “I shouldn’t have said that. You weren’t ready. I’m so sorry.”

Having his senses back on functioning, it gradually seeped into Wooseok’s mind; _Jinhee is hugging me… Jinhee is hugging me again._

His blood rushed to his face and a bright shade of red bloomed on his ears. In his memory, it was only their second time hugging. The thoughts that had caused his panic attack were quickly forgotten as he chose to focus on the touch and let the rare moment sink in. He could get himself depressed with those horrifying thoughts any other time.

_It feels nice,_ he thought.

But then, an unusual thought occurred to his mind.

_Does she… do this often with Wooshin? Is it a normal thing to them? Whenever I was gone, he… Wooshin must have done things to get closer to her… Hasn’t he?_

This moment became the first time ever – Kim Wooseok was _jealous._ Jealous of his own alter.

_Maybe Jinhee likes Wooshin better… Maybe she wants him to come out now. I’m weak and disappointing. I… No, I want to be brave like him. What would Wooshin do if he was here?_

Heart leaping and drumming erratically, Wooseok forced his stiff, awkward arms to move, enveloping the girl in a timid hug.

Jinhee gasped. “Wooshin?”

Wooseok’s jealousy grew even stronger at the mention of the name, like a balloon that was growing bigger and bigger, edging to its limit.

His doubtful hug then transformed into a firm, somewhat possessive one. As he squeezed his eyes shut, fighting to tame his wilding heart, a bead of tear slid down his cheek and dropped into the fabric of Jinhee’s school blazer.

“Is that you?” Jinhee asked again.

“No... I’m Wooseok.”

The answer got Jinhee’s heart to skip a beat. Indeed, she believed Wooshin and Wooseok were one whole person, but knowing that it was Wooseok who was hugging her so tight just felt… _different._

A good, thrilling kind of different.

“I’m going to tell everything I know,” Wooseok said, lips quivering, “o-only if you can accept everything in me. Only… if you promise not to leave me, like others did.”

A hint of fear arose in Jinhee’s heart. A part of her was afraid of what he could possibly mean, if there was something terrible that she hadn’t discovered. But of all people, she knew it best that if she failed to stay, the boy would be left more shattered than before.

So she held him closer and nodded fervently, ready to take whatever was coming her way.

“I promise. I won’t leave you no matter what… I’m here for you. I promise.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter contains crucial information that will be needed to understand the following chapters, so make sure not to skip it! Happy reading :)

* * *

“I promise.”

It felt like a whole bucket of iced water poured all over Wooseok’s burning body.

“Thank you.” His voice was no louder than a whimper. He wiped his wet cheeks before holding Jinhee’s hands ever so shyly. Feeling utterly nervous, he sucked in a deep breath and held the air in his puffed cheeks.

“It’s okay.” Jinhee smiled and shook Wooseok’s arms to loosen him up. “Let’s do it slowly, starting from anywhere you’re comfortable with. Oh! But before you start...”

Jinhee turned her head towards her brother, who was scooting closer like a little kid about to hear a bedtime story.

“Junho, we have to promise to keep this a secret, and not to tell anyone outside this house. Can we do that?” Jinhee asked.

“Yes, I promise.” Junho shot his friendly eye smile at the older boy.

The three teenagers hooked their little fingers together, and then pressed their thumbs together in a pinky promise.

It was just a small, child-like gesture, yet the siblings had no idea how much it really helped Wooseok to be at ease.

Jinhee took Wooseok’s hands back in hers and waited for him to start.

“So… You’ve seen two of me a lot.” Wooseok bowed his head and heaved another long sigh. He knew it was going to be long and hard. “I think the first time Wooshin apppeared was in elementary school, sixth year. I used to be naughty when I still lived with my parents. I didn’t want to go to school, I always gave them a hard time. It’s not a memory that I can remember. It’s… I’m… I’m unable to recall everything that happened in my childhood. But my parents like to talk about things in the past, when we were still together. I was told that when I turned nine years old, they went bankrupt and couldn’t afford to pay for my study. That time, my dad’s brother and his wife had just lost their unborn baby. His wife was diagnosed with an illness that made her unable to be pregnant again. Because they wanted to have a child so bad, and my parents were having a hard time taking care of me, my uncle offered to be my foster father. So my parents sent me to Seoul, to live with my uncle and my aunt, and go to a nice school. I have no memory of the time when I first moved here… but I think those were happy times. Because the last time I met my aunt by chance, around two years ago, she was still really nice to me. She said I had grown up well and didn’t seem naughty anymore. But maybe… maybe my uncle never liked me in the first place.

The starting point of my memories is when my aunt had left us to live with her parents. I only knew her from the photographs that were still hanging on the walls back then. I was around twelve years old. My uncle would always come home drunk, break things, yell at me… H-He blamed me for everything… but I can’t remember what had happened before my aunt left.”

_Poor child… He doesn’t even have any happy memories,_ Jinhee thought, blinking back her tears. “Why… didn’t you go with your aunt?”

“I think it was just because my uncle was the one blood-related to me, not my aunt.” Wooseok’s expression turned dark and gloomy. “After she had left, my uncle chose to keep me instead of returning me to my parents, because they were still recovering financially. But eventually my uncle became an even angrier person. He would express it by making me study hard all the time, and he would punish me if I didn’t get perfect scores. He… He always threatened me so I wouldn’t tell my parents any of it, saying that he’d stop paying for my needs and let my parents struggle for me again. He realized his threat worked on me… so… h-he started to use that threat for… for o-other _things_.”

Wooseok’s voice subsided into a mewl as fresh tears fell and splashed onto his forearms. His glistening eyes were wide in horror seeing his awful memories flash like snippets of a movie inside his head, many, _many_ series of nightmare-like days and nights in his past painful years.

“Oh my goodness… It can’t be what I’m thinking,” Junho mumbled to himself, clutching onto his head.

Feeling tortured just to see him struggle and talk his pain out, Jinhee reached her hand out and gently wiped Wooseok’s tears away. “Wooseok… Do you want to stop?”

Wooseok shook his head and exhaled a shaky breath. “Let me… Let me get it out. I’m desperate.”

So Jinhee caught him in a firm hug, and everything poured out of his mouth altogether with heavy sobs – how his uncle had started to touch him and punish him in such disgusting and inappropriate ways, how he had made him do things for his own advantage, how he had been treated like an animal when he had been just a young innocent child; everything that had shattered his soul, that had led to the birth of his rebellious alter, Kim Wooshin.

The three teenagers’ cries mixed together, the sound so painful and heart-wrenching in the quiet room.

“Wooseok hyung!” Junho cried, holding the other two in his arms. “You didn’t deserve all of that, facing that monster alone for so long!”

“He… He protected me,” Wooseok said in between his sobs, “Wooshin protected me. I never liked him, but he was… he was there to protect me.”

Those words were muttered repeatedly, like a new realization that had just downed on him. His rushed heavy breath soon subsided and became steady, long and deep, as his gaze turned blank and empty. But still, fresh tears wouldn’t stop slipping out.

“He fought against my uncle,” he quavered, “he fought hard and we got hurt so bad. It really hurt. But he kept doing it again and again. I thought he just wanted me to get killed… s-so I tried to get rid of him.”

_That weakling could never get rid of his mental shield. I am his shield._ Wooshin’s words resounded in the back of Jinhee’s head.

“Wooseok, please accept him,” Jinhee begged, “please make peace with him. He’s just a part of you… He _is_ you. Don’t push him away, please. He even said he wasn’t the strongest, but you can be stronger as one.”

Something in Jinhee’s words struck Wooseok and made him freeze. “He… He said what?”

Jinhee and Junho exchanged a puzzled look. “…Not the strongest?”

Wooseok wiped his eyes and blinked in disbelief. “It was… I guess he was trying to tell you something. Does he… really trust you that much?”

Jinhee worked her mind to recall everything related to that hint. And so randomly, out of the blue, a scene of a different time was fetched from her memory – something different, but sounded quite similar then that she compared them.

“He once said… even though I thought he was the bad one, the truth is he wasn’t the monster in that body, and he had learned to control himself,” Jinhee quoted the exact words Wooshin had said, back when he had let her see and touch his scars in the swimming pool. “He called it ‘holding his own leash’.”

Wooseok found the answer to his own question. His gaze faltered to his hands. “He really trusts you that much.”

“W-What do you mean?” Jinhee felt her skin crawl, sensing that a bomb was about to be dropped.

“If he chose to let you know… then, I will let you know.” Wooseok’s doe eyes that seemed so frightened slowly shifted to the girl’s puzzled face. “T-The Wooshin you know now… he isn’t the same as the old Wooshin. He was mean, and sort of vi-violent. But, then… he was split into two.”

Jinhee and Junho’s mouths fell open in utter shock. “No way! W-Where’s the other one? What is he like?” _Mean and violent._ Jinhee’s bad feeling only grew worse each second that passed with no immediate answer.

Wooseok dropped his gaze once again, starting to feel terrified by the possibility of being pushed away once he told the truth.

“…From the stories people talked about back then, his name was Wooshin too. Or maybe it was Woo Shin… because sometimes he refered to himself as Shin only. He demanded people to respect him like he was an adult. Shin appeared the second, after people said Wooshin had started to behave. He was... like… t-the bad side that refused to be tamed, I’d say. Because, maybe to him, Wooshin without his evil traits was just as defenseless as me… so he chose to separate himself from Wooshin and took all the ill intentions with him. He did— Ah, I-I don’t know if you can hear more about him,” suddenly Wooseok spoke fast, “Please don’t be scared, he did bad things but he only appeared three times and hasn’t come out for years. P-Please don’t avoid me, I’m not dangerous—”

“No, wait, Wooseok… Calm down.” Jinhee held Wooseok’s sweaty hands and stared deep into his eyes, staying still until he could manage his breath again.

“Is he gone for good, hyung?” Junho asked once Wooseok had calmed down.

Wooseok shook his head helplessly. “I can never be sure… but I really hope so.”

“Let me know one thing he did?” Jinhee asked, with a tone that sounded like she was talking extra carefully to a little child. “We’ve promised we wouldn’t leave you.”

“He…” Wooseok’s face contorted in discomfort. “He hit my uncle’s head with a soju bottle… and destroyed his adult video collection.”

The Cha siblings gawked for almost a whole minute like a pair of dead fish.

And Junho hit his palms together in slow claps. “That’s… so brave. He’s got balls—” he slapped his own lips and quickly fixed his words, “he’s got some guts.”

“I’m surprised you’re still alive.” Jinhee said in awe.

Wooseok rubbed his nape awkwardly, having not expected that sort of reaction. “He survived my uncle’s rage by b-beating him up, until he passed out… He was even stronger than Wooshin was.”

“And your uncle still beats you even after that happened?” Jinhee asked in disbelief.

“He still does, but not as much as in the past. He also doesn’t… _touch_ me anymore.” Somehow, a bitter smile managed to find its way to Wooseok’s lips. “He’s doing better at his job. He’s a much busier person now. Most of the time, he only gets angry if I don’t do well at school or if he doesn’t find food when he’s home.”

“Why did he get angry at you this time?” Junho asked, refering to what had caused Wooseok to run away from home.

“I forgot to prepare dinner for him.” Wooseok sighed. “I shouldn’t have gone straight to bed after returning home.”

“Wow, he really blew it out of proportions.” Jinhee rolled her eyes. “Is he not going to eat at all if you don’t feed him? What is he, a baby? Pfft, he must be starving to death right now.”

Jinhee’s exasperation surprisingly drew out a tiny, inaudible chuckle from Wooseok.

“That day I wrote a letter to Wooshin. I wonder if he has read it,” Wooseok said. “Ah, actually… now I hope he threw it away, so my uncle won’t see it.”

“Oh, that sounds fun, though,” Junho said, “I should try writing to myself, since people say it’s creepy to talk to myself.”

Wooseok smiled fondly at the younger boy. He sounded so pure and innocent, Wooseok thought.

“Ah, but what kind of letter, though?” Jinhee asked out of curiosity.

Wooseok’s eyebrows creased while his mind was loading the memory. Once the image began to appear clearer in his mind, his cheeks flushed pink, and he covered them with his hands adorably.

It was about that friendly competition with Yohan, to fight over the very girl who was sitting so close to him at the moment.

“N-Nothing, it was nothing,” Wooseok said in panic.

“Ey… You look embarrassed.” Jinhee shot a cheeky teasing look. “What could it be? Some boy stuff?”

“K-Kind of.” Wooseok fidgeted with his fingers.

Meanwhile, Junho was busy guessing in his head. _Yohan hyung said he was going out with Wooseok hyung that morning to talk about it. Then it means the letter could be about it, no?_

“Just, um… I-I told Wooshin about Yohan.” Wooseok decided to spill just a bit, but it was enough to confirm Junho’s guess. “I told him that Yohan could be a nice friend, if he wants to open up to him.”

“That’s so sweet of you.” Jinhee’s smile was a happy and genuine one. “That’s true, I hope you get along well with him.”

From how Jinhee’s face instantly brightened up as Yohan was brought up into the topic, Wooseok could see now why Wooshin would get jealous of that boy. _Not_ that he felt it too, no, Wooseok thought he wasn’t jealous of Yohan. He couldn’t feel that kind of emotion as strongly as Wooshin could anyway.

“Ah, hyung, there’s something left.” Junho brought them back to their initial topic. “Your other alter… The child-like one that appeared earlier.”

“Oh, right!” Jinhee was extremely curious about the said alter – possibly the one who had hugged her and cried in his sleep. “Are there any other alters we don’t know yet?”

“There are.” Wooseok seemed doubtful. “But just like Shin, some of them were active only in the past. I’m not sure whether they’re dormant or gone for good. Do you want to know about them too?”

Jinhee nodded. “Tell us. It’s best to know all possibilities that may happen, right?”

“Then I’ll introduce them briefly.” Wooseok heaved a deep sigh before starting again. “I had two more alters in middle school. One was active before I became close friends with Doyeon, and another one after she had left. They were kind of emotional. The first one called himself Min Wooyoung. He was a very melancholic twenty-year-old guy who loved to read and write romantic poems. I stopped finding his papers in my room when I started to have my… my first c-crush on Doyeon.” He blushed. It was still beyond awkward for him to bring up any topic related to his love life.

“Aww,” Jinhee cooed, “it sounds like he dissolved into you and gave you the ability to feel love.” And perhaps, the long-gone alter was also the reason why he could feel jealousy towards Wooshin.

Wooseok nodded. “I was pretty much numb to that kind of emotions before. But then we fused together.”

“How about the second one, hyung?” Junho asked.

Wooseok’s gaze turned darker as he recalled a particular old alter of his. “Before I tell you, please remember that this alter hasn’t been active for years… Don’t be surprised.”

Jinhee and Junho grabbed each other’s hands by instinct and held their breath in.

“He appeared in the timespan between Shin and the child alter’s first appearances, several months after Doyeon had left. He was… a twelve-year-old boy. He had my lost memory of my early years living with my uncle. His name was Moon Hyunwoo… I found his name on his suicide notes.”

The siblings gasped in horror.

“Oh my God!” Junho widened his eyes and pulled on his hair. “Noona, we have to get rid of all sharp objects in this house!”

“Oh no, I was really hoping you didn’t have a suicidal character in your system!” the older sibling whined and panicked. “A-Are you sure that alter is gone?? When was the last time he appeared? W-Why are you smiling?! There’s nothing nice about this!”

But the smile gracing Wooseok’s lips was a bittersweet one. It was the irony that had drawn the smile out.

“If Wooyoung disappeared to be my melancholic and romantic side, where did Hyunwoo go?” Wooseok threw the question like a bait to the siblings, encouraging them to figure out the answer themselves. “Wouldn’t it be bad if he had gone the same way as Wooyoung did?”

“No.” Jinhee shook her head feverishly. “He couldn’t have fused with you too! D-Don’t— You’ve never thought of doing _that,_ have you? Don’t you dare, Kim Wooseok.”

“You don’t have to worry.” Wooseok bowed his head and stiffled a chuckle. “I can’t say he didn’t fuse with me…”

“No.” Jinhee refused to believe that the sweet, calm and composed nerd could have self-harming thoughts running through his mind – although it seemed absolutely possible in other people’s eyes.

“…but I also can’t say he did,” Wooseok continued. “I don’t know if it always happens the same way when an alter fuses with me, but… I expect to have their memory if we do fuse together. I don’t have his memory. Afer Wooyoung and I became one part, I came to like poetry. It was clear where he went. But even before Hyunwoo existed, I had already thought of… doing _it,_ several times… w-when things were too hard to bear. I can’t say for sure that those thoughts exist because of him. But if he’s there in me, you don’t need to worry. He was just twelve years old. He didn’t know how to do _it_ properly. That’s why I’m still alive.”

Wooseok’s smile wasn’t enough to put Jinhee at ease.

“…Well, but if he did fuse with _you_ , a whole seventeen-year-old genius, you’d sure know how to do it _properly_!” Suddenly Jinhee grabbed Wooseok’s hands and urged him to look at her in the eyes. “Repeat after me. ‘I.’”

Wooseok parroted obediently. “I.”

“Promise.”

“Promise.”

“NOT to do.”

“Not to do.”

“Anything harmful to myself.”

“Anything harmful to myself.”

“I am NOT suicidal.”

“I am not suicidal.”

“Good. That’s it.”

“Good. That’s it.”

“Okay, stop copying me.” Jinhee put her index finger on Wooseok’s lips to stop him. Junho giggled to himself – he found the other two quite adorable even in the tense atmosphere.

“You’ve promised. Don’t break that promise, alright?” Jinhee retracted her hand only when Wooseok had answered with a nod.

“Didn’t I tell you not to worry?” Wooseok chuckled. “I still have another one. He came and balanced everything.”

“Is it the child alter?” Junho asked.

The older boy answered with a nod and a soft smile. “Since he joined the system, I haven’t thought of harmful things as much as in the past. Especially since I entered high school. So… He appeared around my fifteenth birthday. When I visited my parents, they showed me my old toys that they had found in the storage, and told me to take them with me when I returned here. I played with them whenever I was sad, but after a while, I pitied myself for doing that. So I took them all out of my room and stored them somewhere else. Maybe it was what triggered this alter to come out. Whenever he appeared, he always found those toys and brought them back to my room. I got tired of putting them away. So I ended up letting them be.

Sometimes I like to think that this alter is me in my childhood. Maybe he has the happy memories with my parents too. That’s why he’s mischievous and playful. But I don’t really know much about him, no one has interacted with him before. I don’t even know his name.”

“His name is Woo,” Junho said, surprising the other two. “Earlier while running away with my phone, he said, ‘Hyung, play with Woo!’ I was confused why he called me hyung. I said, ‘No, you’re the hyung!’ and he said, ‘No, you’re old, you’re the hyung!’ So… That’s why I called you hyung instead of sunbaenim earlier. I hope you don’t mind…?”

Wooseok shook his head, his lips forming a small, suppressed smile, seeming to be both happy and somewhat emotional. “It’s the first time I hear someone call me hyung.”

Because no one had been close enough to call him that.

“Wooseok hyung.” Junho repeated with his adorable eye smile. “You’re the hyung. I’ll call you that a lot from now on. Wooseok hyung, Wooseok hyung, Wooseok hyung.”

Wooseok covered his shy smile with the back of his hand, but the siblings could still see his eye smile that they found so dear and precious.

Jinhee went to get a notebook and a pen to note down the summary of Wooseok’s explanation. She put six of her fingers up. “So, there are six of you? Kim Wooseok, Kim Wooshin, Shin, Min Wooyoung, Moon Hyunwoo, and little Woo. How would you describe them in a few words? We’ll use that to explain to Mom and Dad.”

Wooseok rubbed his nape and jutted out his full lips as he thought of the right words to explain. “Um… You know… Wooseok is me. I’m the original personality… and I’m—I’m shy, you know about me.”

“Okay.” Jinhee’s hand began to get busy writing in her book, while her curious brother took a peek over her shoulder to see what she was writing.

Wooseok continued, “Wooshin is my dominant alter and the only one who is as active as me. He used to be harmful… but now I’ll refer to him as my main protector. He’s a mischievous and rebellious teenager who’s the same age as me. You can say… he’s what I would have grown up into if I had lived normally. Shin is probably the oldest and strongest in my system. I guess he existed just to take revenge, because he was so angry and hateful. He was scary. Min Wooyoung was the twenty-year-old melancholic and romantic guy who loved poems, who disappeared when I had my first crush. Moon Hyunwoo was my twelve-year-old self. He was a harmful suicidal alter because he remembered everything my uncle did to me back then... The things that I can’t remember even now. And lastly… It’s Woo. The naughty and playful little one. He’s from my early childhood when I still lived with my parents, so he must be younger than Hyunwoo. But you’ll have to ask him to know his age.”

“Okay, well noted.” Jinhee finished her note and closed the book. Suddenly Wooseok felt like a foreign species being studied by a scientist.

“Y-You’re… going to keep that note a secret, r-right?” Wooseok looked at the book as if it held the whole horrifying story of his life. “Please don’t show it to anyone… e-except your parents.”

“Of course.” Jinhee flashed her sweetest smile, and gave a light pat on the other’s hand. “Thank you so much for opening up. You’re really strong, you have no idea.”

“The strongest!” Junho flexed his own arms, and then gave two thumbs up along with his eye smile.

Wooseok realized he had been worried for nothing; the siblings’ reaction after he was done spilling everything was completely the opposite of what he had expected. No hurtful words and judgmental stares. He found their genuine smiles and encouraging words more rewarding than anything, he couldn’t help but shed tears because of how relieved and happy he was – more relieved than ever.

“Woo hyung, don’t cry.” Junho scooted closer and cuddled the older boy, giggling as he did so. Jinhee cooed at the heart-warming sight.

Wooseok bowed his head hiding his sheepish grin. “Ah... Sometimes my mom calls me that. Woo. Perhaps it’s my childhood nickname.”

Reminded of something, Jinhee went to her bed and came back with her stuffed fox. “Woo and Woo!” She giggled. “Wooshin gave me this fox and I named him Woo. You still have the girl, we agreed to name her Yeo. So, together they’ll be Yeou. Fox.”

Wooseok was taken aback to see the toy in Jinhee’s hands. No, it wasn’t that he didn’t like the fact that Wooshin had given away his belonging to someone without his knowledge. It was something like this that could make Wooseok wonder if Wooyoung was still there, acting up inside him.

Again… it was _jealousy_. Something that he would never admit in his normal state.

It became a new achievement in his life; getting jealous twice in a span of one hour.

Wooseok might have been a shy nerd, but just like what Yohan said, he was still a guy. And that natural instinct of a guy was kicking in at the moment, making him think, _I have to give more and try harder._

And yet, as he stared at Jinhee’s bright smile, images of unwelcomed memories flashed in his mind, coming from all the way back in his dark middle school years. Strong guilt that he had buried for years was then stirring deep inside him, ready to rise back to the surface, killing his very little confidence all at once.

_I… I don’t deserve to fight for you._

“Wooseok, do you have anything else you want to tell?” Jinhee asked, still hugging the fox in her arms.

Wooseok’s gaze involuntarily casted down to her folded legs. Nothing seemed wrong with them.

“I…” _I’m not ready. She will leave me for sure._ “N-Not for now.”

“Okay. You can take your time.” Jinhee offered a warm smile that made Wooseok shrink even more under her kind eyes. “Now, how do I put this… Our friends at school _reeeeally_ miss you. But we know you left your stuff at your uncle’s house, so we talked about sneaking in and getting your stuff. Can we do that?”

They proceeded to arrange their sneaking plan like a group of spies – or more like Jinhee and Junho arranging the plan, and Wooseok providing the needed information, while half of his mind was wandering away.

The further he was gone into his deep thoughts, the more he understood Wooshin’s motive, his reason why he had approached Jinhee since the very first day – why he had insisted to be by her side for the next one school year.

And above it all, now he knew what had given Wooshin the strength to conceal Hyunwoo in his confinement, bury him deep down in his soul.

Wooseok understood now. But he had no audacity and confidence left in him to follow Wooshin’s way.

_Wooshin, you made the mess… you clean it up._

* * *

**A/N: Here's a pic to sum up Wooseok's personalities! It's the pic at the beginning + the names lol hope it's enough to portray them : >**

****


	9. Chapter 9

* * *

“We’ll pay for the therapy.”

Jinhee’s mother’s unilateral declaration that came right after Wooseok’s confession earned various reactions from four other faces in the living room.

“We will?” The father asked, surprised, but not unpleasantly. They were far from lacking financially anyway.

“Please don’t do it, ma’am, I can’t let anyone spend money on me like this.” Wooseok pleaded.

“Eh? Ma’am again? I told you, that sounds too formal. Wooshinie has started calling me mother since yesterday!” The middle-aged lady giggled. She was obviously fond of the said boy.

Jinhee’s parents weren’t _that_ surprised anymore after hearing the whole story, since their children had given them a quick preview beforehand, which had given them the shock of their lives. Instead of kicking him out like Wooseok had expected, they somehow put a special interest in his case – especially Jinhee’s father, who happened to be a doctor.

Doctor Cha Hyunho. He wasn’t exactly a psychiatrist, but a pediatrician, who managed children and teenagers’ health – that including their mental health. He was a kind man who loved children.

And as far as he was concerned, Wooseok still fell into the appropriate age category to be his patient.

“Mom, we have a doctor right here,” Jinhee reminded her mother. “That is… If dad won’t mind?”

The doctor seemed conflicted. “It’s not that I don’t want to,” he said, “but I don’t specialize in this area. While I also do practice psychoterapy for children and teenagers, it’s not my position to prescribe medication. It’s best to get help from a psychiatrist for appropriate medication and further treatments. They may involve lab tests too, that will be important. Well, I guess I won’t mind helping Wooseok get those treatments if he wants it.”

“Thank you, Dad.” Jinhee gave a thankful smile to her father, and then turned to Wooseok. “Let’s go to a psychiatrist then. You just have to open up, my dad will take care of the rest.”

Wooseok fidgeted harder and pushed himself to shake his head. “I-I can’t, I’m sorry. It will be costly. Don’t spend money on me, please.” He added another reason to support his argument, “And besides, I don’t… know if I can open up. It may not work.”

His negative response made Jinhee roll her eyes. _This is so him. He’ll keep telling us not to pay for his treatments no matter how many times we say it’s okay._ Her eyebrows then creased as she worked her mind to find a solution. “Dad, you _do_ practice psychotherapy, right? Can we start from there? Wooseok can try to open up to you first.”

The father looked at the nervous fidgeting boy, and the sight tugged at his heartstrings.

“Well… I guess I can find some free time for our sessions between my schedules.” He sighed and smiled in sympathy.

Wooseok snapped his head up in surprise and disbelief, having not expected the doctor to agree at that instant. “B-But—I don’t want to trouble you, sir. Y-You’re also a doctor, I can’t get your help for free.”

“Son, it’s not a problem I’m concerned of.” Jinhee’s father moved closer to sit next to Wooseok, and once again heaved a long sigh as he weighed any possible options that he could think of to help the boy.

“If I may know, what do your parents do now? In your hometown?” he asked.

Jinhee and Junho looked at each other, and then at Wooseok. They hadn’t thought of asking him about it.

“They started a new business two years ago,” Wooseok said, “a merchandise production. Last time I called them, about three weeks ago, they said it was improving fast. They got a deal with an entertainment company to produce lightsticks for their new group.”

“Seems like they’re doing well now. It’s good to hear.” The doctor gave a warm fatherly smile. Wooseok could see why his job was suitable for him. “Oh, you called three weeks ago? Do you want to call them again soon, son?”

Wooseok dropped his head and played with his fingers, his mind flying back to his parents. Suddenly he felt strong longing stir inside him. The doctor’s soft voice wasn’t helping it; it only pushed him closer to the verge of tears.

“I want,” he said. _I really want._

“Ahh, me too. Now that I think of it, I haven’t called my parents for a month now!” Jinhee’s father chuckled, his deep voice sending warmth to Wooseok’s chest. “I got too busy that I forgot to call them! How about you, son? Did you get busy too?”

Jinhee and Junho felt the proudest of their father; instead of interrogating Wooseok in an intimidating manner, he made it a warm conversation for Wooseok to open up comfortably. The boy had said that he didn’t want to trouble the doctor, but at that moment, their first session was already starting without him realizing.

“I’ve been busy with school, but… it’s not why I haven’t called them,” Wooseok said, now talking with a pout. “I’m afraid I would say too much if I call them when I’m sad.”

“Ah, I get it. You don’t want them to worry about you, right?” Doctor Cha asked, and Wooseok nodded dejectedly. “You’re really a good son. Say, how about we do something fun? And then when you feel much better, we can call your parents and say hi to them.”

“S-Something fun?” Wooseok asked.

The elder answered with an excited nod and a big smile. “Now that I think of it, it’s been a while we haven’t had a family trip! Jinny and Junho would sure love to have you go with us, right?” The siblings supported with fervent nods and their broad grins. “I have great suggestions of places we can go to. But you can tell me your ideas first, if you have any! Do you want to go and have fun somewhere? You can pick anywhere you want, as long as it’s not the North Pole!” The father laughed.

Wooseok’s gloomy features eventually lit up as his mind was then filled with fun thoughts. His round eyes were almost sparkling with excitement.

“I’ve… I’ve lived in Seoul for eight years, but I’ve never been to any amusement parks here. I also like swimming… and… and I want to eat some food I haven’t had in years.”

Jinhee grew emotional witnessing her reserved chairmate now opening up to her father, telling him things he liked, with that pure innocence of a little child. When her father agreed to do everything he mentioned and settled the plan, she realized it was all just the first step to prepare him for the start of the healing process – the doctor wanted him to be in the best mental state as possible before he had to let him touch and treat his wounds. And Jinhee just knew that healing Wooseok wasn’t entirely impossible after all.

For a moment there, Jinhee had forgotten the fact that Wooseok was smart. She realized it only when he asked, “Doctor, if this works and I can heal, does that mean… Wooshin will be gone?”

For sure, he could see where things were heading to. He was aware that the doctor had initiated the first step even though his kind offer of giving free treatments had been rejected earlier.

Jinhee was worried. _Wooseok, I hope you’re not just playing along… I want you to heal._

“He doesn’t have to be gone.” Doctor Cha smiled. He decided to be less subtle towards the smart boy and opted to be a little more straightforward. “You’ve come to accept him, right? It would be ideal if you and your _friends_ can be fully integrated into one, but some people with your case are not after the same goal. Some are happy enough with staying multiple, they get along well with all of their alters and work together to run the body. Like a team, or even a family. It’s also a big achievement because full integration is not easy to achieve. Would you like to be close friends with Wooshin too?”

The idea of having such relationship with his alter made Wooseok feel giddy inside. They had always hated each other, but if that possibility existed, he would embrace it with no doubt. Would Wooshin ever see him as a friend?

“I would… like us to stop hating each other’s existence,” Wooseok confessed. “If I look back, I can see that he did things to protect _us_. I’m sure he believes I’m too weak to protect myself. B-because it’s true. But he also got hurt a lot… whenever he fronted to shield me. I want… I want to protect him too. I hope he will stay until I’m strong enough to protect him and myself, so he can… leave in peace someday if he has to. A-And I wish I could communicate more with him.”

“That is already a big step you’ve taken.” Doctor Cha gave two thumbs up. “Before anything, you do have to accept your alters! Just like family members, you shouldn’t lock any of them out. They might hate you too if you hate them. Now, Wooshin needs to know what you think about him, and tell what he thinks about you. When you and he reach mutual understanding, you can start building a healthier relationship with him. For now, he is called your primary protector. It’s a really important role in your system. Later, when things get better, he may be the one managing the other boys in there if he keeps that role. So you must learn to trust him, okay?”

Wooseok nodded slowly. Something caught his attention. “’ _If_ he keeps that role’…? Will that change?”

The rest of the family shifted their attention to the doctor, who seemed to be thinking of the right words to explain.

“Well it may, it may not,” he began, “nobody can be sure of it. Ahh, if you grow attached to him, some changes may be quite hard for you. There are many things that can happen to him. He may stay the same, or he may grow better as a protector and a trauma holder. He may even change if another alter integrates with him, or he may disintegrate into new alters. He can fuse with you too, or… just like your three old alters, he can go dormant. He may be replaced by a new primary protector if it happens.”

The last possibility mentioned saddened not only Wooseok, but also the Cha siblings. What would it be like if their cheeky Wooshin wasn’t there anymore to protect Woooseok and annoy everybody else?

“But!” Doctor Cha pointed his index finger up, pulling the teenagers’ attention back to him. “Even if he integrates into you and disappear as an active alter, he will still be there deep inside you. You don’t have to be sad! His strengths will be yours too, and yours will be his. You will be like him, he will be like you… you and he will be combined into one. Transform!” He raised both of his hands, and then clasped them together. His child-like smile was transferred to Wooseok’s lips.

“Wooshin plus Wooseok,” Junho whispered, “Wooshock.”

“I’ll be brave like Wooshin,” Wooseok smiled bashfully.

“Oh, we’ll be sure to test that tomorrow.” Jinhee shot a creepy smile, addressing their plan to sneak into his uncle’s house the following day.

“That’s… a bit too soon.” Wooseok grimaced. “I hope Wooshin will come out and do it for me.”

“If Wooshin can do it, Wooseok can do it too.” Jinhee balled her hands and mouthed, “Fighting!”

_I can do it too._

Wooseok let those words sink in, repeated them in his head the whole night, and the day after.

He spent the next day helping Jinhee’s mother take care of the house while waiting for the siblings to come home from school. The mother found his jittery mumbling self quite adorable and eventually developed a liking in teasing him – like mother, like daughter.

Meanwhile, at school, Jinhee had to explain to the dumb and dumber why they couldn’t come along.

“You know I’m good at taekwondo, I can knock his uncle out in case he suddenly comes back,” Hangyul said.

“I may seem dumb, but I can be helpful too in situations like this,” Seungyoun added his argument.

“Nope. You guys will catch the neighbours’ attention instead. The more people who go, the riskier it will be.” Jinhee heaved a tired sigh. “It’s fine, Junho can give a hand if we need some help. We’ll just grab some stuff and leave.”

Hangyul and Seungyoun looked at each other and shrugged. “Okay.”

Later, as Jinhee was about to go home, she ran into none other than Kim Yohan. Her secret crush. Actually, it was Yohan who ran after her and hopped into her track, just like a bunny with his bright toothy smile.

“Hello!” He greeted cheerfully.

“Oh, Yohan! You surprised me.” Jinhee giggled. It was, for sure, a pleasant surprise to her. “I-I didn’t see you around today. Heading home now?”

“Yup! I was busy with the taekwondo club committee today, but it’s not important now.” Soft wrinkles formed by the tails of his puppy eyes as he smiled, complementing his warm aura. “Do you have any plans? I’m kinda free tonight, just not feeling like going straight home.”

“Me?” Wooseok’s face immediately popped out in Jinhee’s head. She let out an awkward laugh. “Ah… That’s too bad. I do have something important to do. Should we go next time?”

_No, wait. Why am I asking him to go next time? Do you think he wants to go with YOU only, Cha Jinhee?? He’s just looking for someone to hang out with!_

Jinhee gave herself a big mental slap and went on with her embarrassed rambling in her head, until Yohan broke it with his bright chirp, “Sure! How about tomorrow? It’s Friday night tomorrow, we can spend more time. That’d be even better!”

Jinhee felt like passing out at that instant. _Yohan wants to spend time with me… Is this even real? I must be high after all of Hangyul and Seungyoun’s absurd nonsense this whole day._

Jinhee shook her head and jumped back into her senses. “S-Sounds nice! Who else are going?”

“No one.” Yohan chuckled. “Do you mind spending time alone with me?”

_Do I mind?? OF COURSE, SIR, OF COURSE I DON’T!_

“No—Not at all!” Jinhee shook her head feverishly and cracked a laugh that sounded both awkward and somewhat too excited. “W-Where are we going anyway?”

“There’s this nice rooftop restaurant at my cousin’s apartment. I think you might like the night city view from up there.”

Jinhee could already visualize the romantic scene in her imagination; a nice dinner on the rooftop, just with Yohan, with the beautiful twinkling lights of Seoul in the background.

And it wasn’t just her delusional fantasy; it was about to come true in around twenty four hours.

It took every string of her self control not to snap and release an embarrassing squeal right in front of Yohan.

“Since the waiting list is always long there, I’ll reserve a table for us if you’d like to go. How’s that?” Yohan asked with a fond smile.

Jinhee nodded and gave her best smile showing off her dimples to the taller. “S-Sounds great! I’ll look forward to it.”

“Me too.”

Their smiling eyes were locked on each other as they walked side by side, with a gap between them that was slowly diminishing until their fingers brushed against each other. Upon the contact, both teens looked down and grinned bashfully to themselves.

“Jinhee.” Yohan kicked a tiny gravel away with the tip of his shoe. “It’s not that I want to be nosy, but, what are you going to do tonight?”

_Should I tell him?_ Jinhee contemplated. “Well… It’s neighbour stuff.” She chuckled. “You know, Wooseok has been absent since Monday. So he has this little problem that makes him unable to come to school. Since he lives in my neighbourhood, I’m going to help him out.”

“Ah… Right. You’re neighbours,” Yohan muttered.

It seemed a little off to Jinhee, how he sounded like he had already known the fact that they were neighbours, because she didn’t feel like she had told him before.

_Maybe someone told him. Or maybe it was Wooseok himself._ She chose to shrug it off.

“Is he okay?” Yohan asked. “I’ve been trying to contact him too, but he never answers my texts and calls.”

_Wow, they’ve exchanged phone numbers already._ Jinhee was impressed.

“Don’t worry! He’s fine. It’s just that he doesn’t have his phone with him these days. Do you want to say something to him?” Jinhee asked.

Yohan thought for a moment. “Umm… Just tell him to hurry and go back to school soon because I miss him.” He giggled.

_Gosh, how cute._ Jinhee couldn’t help but smile from ear to ear. “I’ll make sure to tell him that!”

_Later, that evening…_

Jinhee and Wooseok were hiding behind a bush, spying on a particular house like a pair of sneaky foxes.

“His car isn’t there,” Wooseok said, “he’s not home yet. If things go as usual, he’ll be back in around half an hour.”

“Then we have to hurry. Let’s go!” Jinhee grabbed Wooseok’s hand and led him sprinting towards the big, empty house across the street.

The sky had turned a dark shade of blue. Under the moonlight and the warm white lights illuminating the block, the swift movements of the two teenagers looked like a flash of black shadows. So far, there were no signs of uninvited eyes watching them. Lights could be seen coming from the windows of the houses around them, yet most had curtains blocking the view, as if refusing to care about the outside world in their resting time.

“Oh no, the gate is locked.” Wooseok forced his smart brain to work faster and find an alternative plan. Then, he snapped his fingers as an invisible light bulb lit up above his head. “There’s a hidden spare key.” He pointed at one of the round rocks that formed a pathway to the side door. “I hid it under the eleventh rock from the door.”

“Wow, you’re really well-prepared for this kind of scenarios, huh?” Jinhee asked, impressed.

“J-Just in case.” Despite feeling shy out of his mind, Wooseok crouched down in front of the other with his back facing her. “Can you… get on my shoulders? I-It’s the only way to climb in.”

Jinhee shifted her gaze back and forth between the gate and the crouching boy, who literally looked like a tiny ball in that position.

_No time to think, Jinhee, just move!_ She commanded herself. Gulping down her hidden fear of height, she threw each of her legs over Wooseok’s shoulders. A shriek jumped out and her hands grasped the poor boy’s hair so hard as soon as he stood up.

“Ah, ow—A-Are you okay? You don’t have to do this if you don’t want to, Jinhee,” Wooseok said, holding Jinhee’s ankles to keep her balance.

“No, no, we’re here already. Let’s do this.” Carefully, Jinhee grabbed the upper horizontal bar of the metal gate, and moved one leg after the other from Wooseok’s shoulders onto the gate until she was seated on it.

The gate wasn’t that tall, but looking down made Jinhee’s fear beat her common sense.

“Now, Jinhee, relax your legs. They can’t be too stiff when you land,” Wooseok said, trying to guide the other like a cat’s owner convincing his pet to get down from a tree. The guilt he was feeling inside was getting unbearable.

_I’m the most horrible person for doing this to her again,_ he thought. _If she gets hurt again, it’ll be my fault this time, not Wooshin’s._

“Okay, I’m going to jump. I’m going to jump now before your uncle comes.” Sucking in a deep breath, Jinhee prepared her legs and slowly slid her butt off the gate. Wooseok looked away and blocked the sight with his arm. He was too afraid to witness the little action.

“Oh, oh, oh my gosh, I’m still in one piece! Woohoo!”

When Jinhee’s celebratory yell came from the other side, Wooseok snapped his head to her and a big smile instantly bloomed on his face. It wasn’t a smooth landing, she had collapsed forward after falling into an ungraceful squatting position, but the way she was wiggling around doing a funny dance in the front yard was more than enough to assure Wooseok that she was perfectly fine.

He blew out a sigh in relief, and his happy smile turned into a lovestruck one.

Jinhee counted the rock pathway and stopped at the eleventh rock, as Wooseok had told her. She lifted that rock and found a dirt-covered silver key beneath it.

“Ha! Found it!” She ran back to the gate with the key and easily unlocked it, giving a way for Wooseok to come in.

“Welcome!” Jinhee greeted with a giggle before snatching Wooseok’s wrist and dragging him fast into the house. “Let’s go, hurry!”

Their hearts drummed aggressively against their chests as they ran up the stairs and towards Wooseok’s room. The place was definitely familiar to the boy, but he didn’t feel like he belonged there anymore. To him it was just like committing a crime, breaking into a stranger’s house.

The first thing that stole their attention was the shattered framed photographs on the floor – the old pictures of little Wooseok and his parents. The sight was more than enough to stop all his movements and put him on the verge of tears.

“Wooseok, we gotta move.” Jinhee touched the other’s arm and gave an apologetic look. “Let’s get your stuff quickly and leave this place.”

Wooseok took out a big black duffle bag and proceeded to stuff it with his clothes and school uniforms, as many as he could put in there. The panicking boy then threw his books, his glasses, and other school stuff into his backpack. He had anticipated the worst, but as luck would have it, he found his dead phone still there under his pillow – his uncle hadn’t touched anything but the photographs. After checking his drawers, he found a crumpled paper that was his own letter to Wooshin. He tossed it along with other stuff into his bag, just in case his uncle would find it and read it.

“Don’t forget these.”

Wooseok turned around and found his old photographs in Jinhee’s hand, already clean from the pieces of glass. They were no longer in frames anymore. Aware of how valuable they were, Jinhee slipped them neatly into a notebook that she then put into Wooseok’s bag.

Lastly, she went to the pile of toys and picked up a very familiar stuffed fox – Yeo, the female one.

“Woo will miss her if we don’t bring her along,” she said as she stuffed the fox into the duffle bag and then zipped it up. “Now, should we get your bike too?”

Jinhee’s smug confident smile didn’t give a chance for Wooseok to get all melancholic about the photographs that his uncle had smashed.

In less than five minutes later, they were already back outside, complete with a duffle bag, a backpack, and a bike. Jinhee locked the gate quickly, hopped onto the back seat of the bike, and off they dashed to the new place Wooseok would call his new home.

“We’d make a great team of burglars!” Jinhee’s victorious laugh broke in the night air. She slipped an arm beneath Wooseok’s, reaching her hand forward with her palm facing up. “High five!”

Wooseok hit the other’s palm with his own for a shy high-five. The warm fuzzy feeling in his chest forced his lips to stretch into a big, wholesome, genuine smile. He had never been that happy in a long while – all this time he had always submitted to his uncle’s rules and force, but now that he was breaking that cage together with the girl he liked, he didn’t feel like returning to that darkness anymore.

“Kim Wooseok, you’re a brave guy now! I’m proud of you!!”

* * *

“Kim Wooseok!”

The moment Wooseok stepped a foot into his classroom after four days of being absent, a particular giggly giant sunshine ran to him and knocked the air out of his lungs with a fierce bear hug.

“Wooseokie! I missed youuuuu!”

“S-Seungyoun, I-I can’t breathe.” Wooseok’s voice was muffled by Seungyoun’s chest. The bigger boy rubbed his face all over the smaller’s head, successfully messing his neat hair.

When Seungyoun pulled back, his face crumpled like he was about to burst into tears. “Did you know?? While you were gone, Yeonwoo sat next to Jinhee and Hangyul moved next to me, and we always argued every day! I’ve lost so many braincells sitting with him!”

“Hey, I’ve lost more because of you!” Hangyul threw a playful remark from the back of the class.

Panting softly, Wooseok fixed his hair and smoothed his uniform in a calm and composed manner. “I m-missed you too, Seungyoun.” He bowed his head and smiled to himself.

Seungyoun gasped and his face lit up so bright like the morning sun. “Did you all hear that? Wooseokie says he missed _me_! This is one of the happiest moments of my life, someone punch me!”

“With pleasure.” Hangyul came and prepared his fists. He and the giggly Seungyoun ended up playing cat and mouse around Wooseok.

_It feels good to be welcomed like this,_ Wooseok thought. It wasn’t anything he had experienced in his previous school years.

Then that he was back to school, Wooseok was busier than ever catching up with the projects and assignments. Some homeworks had been done before, thanks to Jinhee, who had been his teacher at home and let him do homeworks together with her. Even so, some other projects forced him to stay in the classroom or in the library during the break, even stay back at school after the school hours ended.

During the break, Jinhee, Yeonwoo, Seungyoun, and Hangyul took turns to accompany him in the classroom and bring him some food they could bring from the cafeteria. But when it was time to go home, sadly, they all had their Friday night plans settled already – except for Seungyoun, who had intentionally emptied his schedule to accompany Wooseok.

“Wooseok… I’m so sorry I can’t stay with you,” Jinhee said once they stopped outside the library. Yohan and Seungyoun were there with them.

Seeing how genuinely guilty and sad Jinhee was, Wooseok shook his head and offered an understanding smile. “I’ll be fine with Seungyoun here. Have fun, Jinhee. You too, Yohan.”

It was surprising to Yohan, how his eye contact with Wooseok could last more than three seconds this time – the smaller boy wasn’t so fast to break it anymore. Both smiled at each other, the kind of smile that seemed perfectly normal to others, but in fact held a deep meaning.

“Thanks. Sorry I have to borrow her for a while.” Yohan chuckled.

“You’re not borrowing her from me, she’s not my belonging.” This time, noticeably Wooseok’s smile turned into a sad one as he shifted his gaze to the girl, whose bottom lip was jutted out slightly into a small pout. Her eyes were round and sad on him like those of a puppy’s. “See you guys later.”

Seungyoun, who was fully aware of the situation, cracked a high-pitched laugh to break the melancholic atmosphere.

“You guys, spending Friday night together alone in the library won’t be less romantic than a rooftop dinner! In fact, more things can happen because nobody would see us. Except maybe the CCTVs.” He pulled a creepy smiley face, making Wooseok’s skin crawl for real even though he meant it as a joke.

“More _things_? Hey, don’t do stupid things or bother him too much, he has to finish his project.” Jinhee warned the big boy with a playful smile.

“Don’t worry, momma!” Seungyoun made an ‘OK’ sign with his fingers. “Wooseok, let’s go!”

Without sparing another glance at the other two, Wooseok turned his back to them and followed Seungyoun into the library.

It was a whole new kind of sadness to him. But sadness is sadness; was he ever unfamiliar with it?


	10. Chapter 10

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I took a while to post this chapter because I was rewriting the first chapter, I didn't like how I introduced the characters (especially Seungwoo) so you can check it out if you'd like, it's a little different but the flow and the content are still the same :) happy reading!

* * *

Wooseok had his secret crush out on a _date_ with another boy, there was nothing he could do nothing about it. He was _devastated_.

Even so, spending Friday night working on a project at the library with the happy virus didn’t sound too bad to him – at least not as bad as doing it alone.

As expected, that place was just as quiet as a deserted island, even while it wasn’t completely empty. There were the librarian lady, half asleep behind the counter, and about five students working on their own projects, with big distance separating them from one another. Seungyoun led Wooseok far to the back of the library, near the _Arts and Culture_ section, where he could find his materials easily. There was no one in sight around their spot.

Seungyoun grabbed a seat and placed his laptop on the table, a gummy smile plastered on his face. “You know, it’s good that I chose to stay here with you. I haven’t even started working on that project.” He giggled, low enough not to bother the peaceful silence.

After grabbing a book, Wooseok sat across the square wooden table, head kept low to hide his smile. Seungyoun was a happy virus indeed; his presence alone was enough to cheer him up.

“Thank you, Seungyoun.” Wooseok began to flip through the pages of the big book before him, not even looking at the other boy as he spoke. He stopped on a page and his doe eyes took a quick scan of the long paragraphs. It was a good thing that Wooshin hadn’t come out. Otherwise, he would have gotten bored the moment he flipped the first page open.

Seungyoun flicked his gaze up from his laptop screen to the small face in front of him. Something was bubbling inside him, perhaps his growing curiosity, making him squirm a little in his seat from the discomfort of staying still and quiet. That was so _not_ him to be calm and composed.

“Wooseok.” Seungyoun began.

“Hm?” Wooseok hummed, pushing up his big glasses, preparing to jot down some important points from the textbook into his notes.

“Can I be nosy on you?” The bigger boy asked, his question halting the tip of Wooseok’s pen from touching the paper. “Ah, but that is if you can talk while working on that. Jinhee will choke me if you can’t finish it because of me,” he giggled again.

Showing a tiny smile, Wooseok began to scribble his _artistic_ handwriting, still refusing to meet Seungyoun’s intrigued eyes.

“It depends on what you ask,” he answered.

Seungyoun decided to just spit out the question. “Do you have a crush on Jinhee?”

Caught off guard, Wooseok choked on his own saliva and the silence was broken by his coughing fit.

“O-Oh, are you okay?? I’m so sorry! Did that come out too blunt?” Seungyoun got up and rushed to the other, just to rub his back and soothe him down before returning back to his seat.

Wooseok covered the lower half of his face with the back of his hand to hide his flushed cheeks. “I’ll… I’ll tell you, if you also tell me something.”

Seungyoun’s eyebrows went up high, having not seen that coming. “Oh? You want to know something about _me_?”

Wooseok nodded.

“W-Well… Sure! You can ask anything.” Seungyoun flashed an innocent smile, slumping down a little in his seat, his long legs brushing against Wooseok’s.

“Are you… perhaps… in a relationship?” Wooseok cocked his head to the side, observing the other’s expression through his round glasses.

Seungyoun’s small eyes rounded and his lips formed a small gaping circle as he jolted up into a straight sitting position. He really wasn’t the best at controlling his reactions – the answer was obvious.

He didn’t even bother trying to deny it. “How… How did you know?”

“So, it’s true?” Wooseok returned his gaze to the book and fixed his glasses, smiling to himself. “It’s hard not to notice when you both sit behind me. I think Jinhee knows too. Congratulations, Seungyoun.”

“It-It’s not that we didn’t want to tell you guys!” Seungyoun waved his hands frantically. Wooseok put his index finger on his own lips, and the other boy lowered his volume that had raised out of panic. He leaned closer and whispered, “It happened just yesterday, and we thought we should make it a surprise on Monday. But, ahh, now you already know! It won’t be fun anymore.”

“I’ll pretend I didn’t know.” Wooseok pursed his lips to hold back his giggle.

Seungyoun leaned back into his seat, a lovestruck smile spread on his face as he let out a happy sigh. “Han Yeonwoo… she fits me like a piece of matching puzzle. Wooseokie, my friend, let me tell you. Girls are complicated creatures, _muuuuch_ more than guys! No, no, it’s not always bad. Sometimes it makes things fun. I mean, they can be something entirely different when you’re alone with them! It’s mindblowing.”

“Did you do something with her?” Wooseok chuckled. He didn’t have to look at the other’s face to know that he was blushing.

“Y-You haven’t answered me, though!” Seungyoun dodged the question.

“I’ll answer two questions honestly if you answer that one,” Wooseok offered a new deal.

Seungyoun looked at the smaller boy in disbelief. “Ah, you make me wonder if I’m sitting with Wooshin right now,” he said, “you… just seem a little more confident than usual. And you’re tricky like him!”

Wooseok couldn’t help but smile bashfully; hearing someone say he was like Wooshin somehow felt like a compliment to him. Breaking into his uncle’s house with Jinhee really had flicked one of the many switches inside his head.

“I’m still Wooseok,” he said, “so… are you going to answer?”

Seungyoun was conflicted. He also had another question he wanted to ask the other boy.

“Ahhh, fine then.” Seungyoun gave in, rubbing his face, grinning bashfully into his palm. “It’s… nothing bad, really. We just shared our first kiss. But…” He slid down in his seat and covered his face out of embarrassment. “She was so good at it.”

“Okay, I get it.” Wooseok cut Seungyoun’s explanation before it could go too far into the details. He felt his own ears and face getting warmer; a glimpse of the scene had flashed in his imagination.

“Your turn to answer!” Seungyoun leaned forward and supported his head in his hands, pushing his cheeks up, making his lips stretch into a wide Joker smile.

Wooseok retracted his body until his back was pressed flat against his chair, lowered his head, and rubbed his nape sheepishly. “I think you know the answer... Right, I like her.”

Seungyoun let out a huge gasp, his jaw fell into a huge smile as he threw his fists in the air, then clutched on his hair as if he couldn’t believe what he had just heard. If only they hadn’t been in the library, he would have let out an ecstatic scream.

“Whoa, I thought you would deny it.” Seungyoun’s eyes were wide and amazed on the shy, squirming boy. “Does anyone else know?”

Wooseok shook his head. “Don’t let anyone know, please.”

The dumbstruck look on Seungyoun’s face was eventually replaced by a touched, emotional one. “Ah, I’m the first to know… I thought I would never be able to enter your bubble, but you trust me this much. I’m so thankful.” And then another gasp left his mouth as a thought downed on him. “Wait, she’s going out with Yohanie! A-Are you sad right now??”

Pouting, Wooseok sighed and played with his pen. “J-Just a little, I guess.”

“Ey… It can’t be just a little.” Seungyoun decided to move to the seat next to Wooseok. He rested his arm on the top rail of the other’s chair and rubbed his narrow shoulder comfortingly. In a low voice, he said, “It’s okay, though, you still have a chance. It’s not over just because they’re having a romantic dinner. It’s nothing compared to living together with her, right? Although it’s just temporary, it’s still a big win that you’re already welcomed in her family, sleeping and eating under the same roof!”

_That’s true… I’m so lucky,_ Wooseok thought, already feeling much better.

“Actually, my second question is related to that.” Seungyoun cleared his throat and furrowed his eyebrows, putting on a serious expression, which still looked funny to Wooseok somehow. “Can I ask now?”

Wooseok blinked at the other and nodded, half nervous, half curious.

“Well, you see…” Seungyoun rubbed his chin, thinking of the right words to say. “You’ve spent so much time alone with her. Starting from the night visits, and then her sleepover at your place, and now you staying at hers. Jinhee let us know about that, but never specified what kind of stuff happened in details. Then, Yeonwoo told me she was worried about how fast you two grew close. So, I’ve just been wondering… How close are you two, actually? Did… nothing happen? At all?”

“What’s supposed to happen?” Wooseok asked back, with an intrigued smile. He found it amusing how Seungyoun was trying to hit around the bush for once, while he was accustomed to being blunt.

“Ah, I don’t know.” Seungyoun scratched the back of his ear clumsily. “Maybe something that Wooshin would do?”

“You should ask Wooshin then, not me.” Wooseok chuckled, secretly enjoying how frustrated Seungyoun looked.

“You said you’d answer honestly.” Seungyoun put on an adorable sad baby face. It managed to melt Wooseok _a little._

“Honestly… I also wonder what happened.” Wooseok sighed. “I think it’s not fair how Wooshin always takes control… at times like… _that_. If you manage to get answers from him, would you tell me?”

Seungyoun blinked dumbly at the other while his mind was trying to process his request. “Ah… This feels a bit funny, no? You want me to ask you, get answers from you, and then tell you the answers. It’s funny.” He began to giggle. “Okay, okay, I can do that. But there’s no way you know absolutely nothing.”

“I only know what I experienced. Which is not much. Except… for yesterday. And the day before that.” Wooseok looked away to hide his smile, recalling the time when he and Jinhee had run away with his bike. How it had felt just to have her hand clutching on the side of his shirt. And when she had hugged him for nearly half an hour while he had poured his heart out.

Seungyoun tilted his head, meticulously observing Wooseok’s bashful expression. “Your ears are so red right now,” he pointed out. Wooseok covered his ears immediately. “Okay, let’s be blunt. Has it gone beyond a friendly hug?”

“O-Of course not,” Wooseok stammered. “What’s beyond a friendly hug?”

“A friendly kiss?” A goofy smile popped out on Seungyoun’s face.

“N-No!” Wooseok covered his face immediately upon realizing that his voice had come out a little too loud.

The mischievous side of Seungyoun pushed him to tease the embarrassed boy even further.

“Are you sure? Maybe Wooshin did, but you just don’t know.” His giggling fit began, along with Wooseok’s panic mode. “You know, Jinhee can’t possibly say, ‘You kissed me!’ because it would be embarrassing! And besides, don’t be embarrassed to admit this, I’m also a guy. Have you never thought of kissing? That thought just comes when you’re alone with your crush, doesn’t it? Don’t you want to have your first kiss with her? Eyy, you’re blushing!” Seungyoun suppressed his laugh and clapped his hands inaudibly. “Wooseok and Jinhee sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S-I—”

“Please stop,” Wooseok whined. His round eyes were already brimming with tears from too much embarrassment.

“Aww, oh my gosh, I didn’t mean to bully you!” Seungyoun laughed and caught Wooseok in his arms, rocking him back and forth. “Jinhee is going to kill me for sure. I’ll let you work in peace now!”

At last, Seungyoun returned to his seat and let Wooseok be. But unfortunately, too late. The poison had been spilled. Wooseok’s mind was far from clear to focus back on his project. All he could think of was that possibility of Wooshin having kissed Jinhee without his knowledge – not to mention the fact that Wooshin’s lips were _his_ lips too – and maybe what it would look like, or what it would _feel_ like, to have that kiss.

For once, the nerdy boy had his mind full of something _unholy_. He felt hot and ashamed.

While he was busy internally struggling, somewhere in the heart of Seoul, his crush was gazing at the city’s enchanting sea of lights. Astonished and mesmerized by the view from high above. She was no longer in her school uniform, but instead an adorable cream chiffon dress with a bowtie on the collar, and a pair of beige flat shoes. She got them all from the boy sitting in front of her, across the table – presents from his female cousin, he said. He himself had changed into a cardigan in the same color as her dress over a white button-up shirt, paired with his white jeans that well defined his toned legs. On the table was a small candle, its warm yellow flame dancing together with the soft wind that toyed with the long strands of the girl’s hair. The boy had his chin propped up in his hand, his gaze on the girl was just the same as hers on the night city view – full of admiration.

Yohan had kept it in for quite a long while, ever since they had been classmates in their freshman year. At one point, it had been said that there had been something going on between Cha Jinhee and Han Seungwoo, their senior, because of how much he had loved to shower her with affection. Back then, Yohan hadn’t been close enough to either of them to know that their relationship had been more like a sister and an older brother.

Han Seungwoo was a friendly big boy, Yohan knew that. But some were afraid of him, and Yohan also knew that. Even then as a sophomore, he’d rather not be in a competition against the senior boy. But, fortunately, now he knew the truth that the girl of his interest wasn’t in Seungwoo’s territory.

His rival then was only a little deer, and thus he was finally making moves. It didn’t necessarily mean he was confident he would win, though – that deer could transform into something entirely different after all.

Meanwhile, unexpectedly, Jinhee had found herself thinking of the boy back at the library. While it seemed like she was lost in the charm of the city lights, she was sinking into her own internal monologue.

_What could he be doing right now? He must be pushing himself too hard again. And Seungyoun must be making it harder for him! Ah, I shouldn’t have left them alone… It’s too bad that he’s not here. The view is so beautiful... Should I take a picture for him?_

Jinhee grabbed her phone, snapped a beautiful picture of the city view, and beamed at the result.

_It’s perfect! I’ll show him later at home. He’ll be distracted if I send this to him now,_ she thought.

A shutter sound coming from another phone stole Jinhee’s attention. She snapped her head towards the boy across the table and found him grinning at his phone screen.

“I took a nice one with you in it.” Yohan showed the screen to the other. In the picture, Jinhee had a distant look as she gazed down at the view, but with a smile gracing her lips – one that she hadn’t been aware of while Wooseok had crossed her mind.

Giggling, Yohan sent the image to Jinhee right away, unaware of how uneasy the other had become after realizing she had been spacing out.

“You’re… You’re really pretty tonight.” Yohan cleared his throat and grinned to himself. “Sorry, that sounds corny.”

Jinhee let out a bashful giggle. “Thanks, though! It’s because of the dress. Ah, I still feel bad for wearing this before I can even meet your cousin.” She fiddled with the pretty bow on her dress. “She really didn’t have to give me anything.”

“We can meet her if she comes back sooner from her boyfriend’s place.” Yohan flashed a fond smile, but then his adorable sheepish side came to the surface. Jinhee couldn’t help but admire his little giggles so much. “Ah, I got really embarrassed when she told me to give you that! She made it seem like I was going out with my girlfriend or something. I asked, wouldn’t it be too much to give a dress on our first hangout? But she was _reeeally_ excited and expecting something to happen.”

“Ah, what could that _something_ be?” Jinhee played dumb and suppressed her smile.

Feeling somewhat nervous, Yohan grinned and toyed with his ear. “It’s… Ah… It’s been years since the last time I took a girl out on a date. She misunderstood, didn’t she? W-Would you even call this a date?” He cracked a nervous laugh.

The information that he thought wasn’t special turned out to be a surprising fact to Jinhee, though. Instead of answering him, she asked in disbelief, “You haven’t had any dates for years? W-Well, I mean, it can’t be that _many_ years since you’re only seventeen, right? But I thought… since you have many female friends…”

“No, they’re all just friends! Really.” Yohan cleared up the misperception right away, looking so baffled to find out what kind of image he had in her eyes. “I-I don’t like any of them. Should I… Should I keep some distance from them?”

“Huh? No! That’s not what I mean!” Jinhee shook her head fervently. “You can be friends with anyone you want to. Just… I just had that thought. You have many pretty friends. Why don’t you… like any of them?”

Yohan fidgeted with his hands and gave a restrained smile. Again, Jinhee couldn’t prevent her mind from flying back to Wooseok – that jittery behavior was so like him.

“M-Maybe… Because I’ve had my eyes on someone for a while.” He gave a hint through his deep gaze.

Jinhee wasn’t dense, but she wasn’t confident either. _What am I thinking? Psh, that can’t be me,_ she thought. Having no courage to ask, she only waited for the other to continue his words with a curious smile.

“Excuse me. Two grilled rib eye steak?” A waiter came breaking the tension. Both teenagers discreetly released their breath that they hadn’t realized they had been holding in.

“Yes, thank you.” Yohan thanked the waiter after their food had been served. Jinhee looked at the exquisite dish with mixed feelings; it sure looked good, _so_ good that she almost didn’t have the heart to eat it. She never understood this whole concept of elite food; the more expensive it was, the smaller portion they got. She could definitely buy a nice outfit with the same amount of money for one serving of that dish. Clothes could be used multiple times, but food wouldn’t stay forever in the body – it’d end up in the toilet.

“Just for tonight,” Yohan said, not the first time for that night. He had said it so many times to assure the other while they had been browsing through the menu. “I don’t usually spend a lot on food like this either. Let’s just take this as a reward for ourselves! You’ve worked hard at school.”

Jinhee chuckled. “I’ll have to pay this back. Thank you, Yohan.”

“Don’t give anything in return, please,” Yohan said, “I-I’m glad I can spend time with you.”

The shy teenagers proceeded to stuff their mouths with their food to mask their smiles. After Yohan brought their conversation all the way back to their first year in high school, recalling funny moments in their old class together, eventually they grew more comfortable in each other’s presence and the slight awkwardness was replaced by fits of laughter. More mouthwatering dishes were served on their table, leaving them full and happy at the end of their meal.

“We should wait for your cousin,” Jinhee said, beaming at the other.

Yohan had a big grin plastered on his face as he patted his full stomach. “Are you sure? It may take a while. No, wait, I’ll ask her.”

Yohan dialed his older female cousin’s number and waited for her to pick up. After the second try with no answers, he opted to text her quickly so he wouldn’t make Jinhee wait.

After paying with a credit card, which probably belonged to his parents, Yohan led his _date_ close to the railing of the viewing deck, where they could get the best view. Some people were taking pictures there, so the pair followed suit – taking pictures of the view, of each other, and a selfie together, courtesy of Yohan’s timid suggestion. The boy tried his best not to display too much excitement as he shoved his phone into his pocket, after a quick scroll through the new pictures in his gallery. They both rested their arms on the railings and beamed at the bright roads down below.

“Thanks for tonight,” Jinhee said, “it’s really nice up here.”

“No, thanks for agreeing to come.” Yohan looked sideways at the other. “Can I… ask a question?”

“Hm?” Jinhee’s attention completely shifted to the boy next to her. “Sure! You’ve treated me to a nice dinner, of course you can ask me as many questions as you want. But I can’t promise I’ll answer all of them.” She flashed a mischievous grin that made the boy giggle.

Yohan cleared his throat and fidgeted with his fingers once again. “Well… I guess this will sound wrong no matter how I ask it. A-Are you close to anyone at the moment? A guy?”

Jinhee felt her heart skip a beat at the unexpected question, yet she managed to mask it with a witty answer. “I’m close to you right now! We’re standing next to each other.” She laughed.

“Ahh,” Yohan whined and laughed along, “I’m sure you know what I mean!”

“Nope, I don’t know what you mean,” Jinhee teased. She tapped her chin pretending to think. “Well, you know I’m close to Seungyoun, since we always hang out together. I’m also close to Hangyul because we’ve been classmates since last year. I’m very close to Junho because he’s my brother, and also Hyeongjun and Eunsang, you know, because they’re always around us.”

Yohan was a shy giggling mess despite having a manly outer look. He twisted around awkwardly and waved his hands in attempt to cut off the other’s teasing.

“Don’t be so mean.” He jutted out his bottom lip adorably once his laugh had subsided. The girl looked so pleased. “There’s another one you haven’t mentioned… Wooseok?”

Jinhee felt her heart jump a little, and she wondered why. “A-Ah, him?” She cracked an awkward laugh. “We’re chairmates, of course we’re close.”

Out of nowhere, an image of Wooshin’s smirk popped out in her head. That face then became pissed as another image followed, where Wooseok was sitting alone in the library.

Jinhee knew he wasn’t alone; Seungyoun was there with him. And besides, they were going to see each other again later at home anyway. So why did she still feel so guilty? And why was she secretly looking forward to going home soon while she was spending time with her crush? She couldn’t understand herself.

Yohan didn’t fail to notice the change in the other’s expression, somewhat gloomier than before. “Is something wrong?” he asked.

“H-Huh?” Jinhee blinked herself back to her senses. Suddenly she felt the need to tell the truth. “A-Ah, you see… I haven’t told you this. Remember when I said I had to help him two days ago?”

Yohan nodded and waited for the other to continue. He seemed perfectly calm, there were neither signs of being clueless nor puzzled.

“Well.” Jinhee cleared her throat realizing her voice had come out dry. “He’s been… kind of staying at my place for five days now. So I helped him get his stuff from his home. He has a problem with his… family, but my family is taking good care of him.”

Yohan nodded once again and flew his gaze to the night sky. Again, like when Jinhee had told him that she and Wooseok had been neighbors, his reaction was nothing much; it just seemed like he had heard of the information before. “I see. Hope his family problem can be fixed soon.”

“I hope so.” Jinhee winced. _It may take a miracle to fix it soon,_ she thought.

“But he’s lucky, isn’t he?” Yohan’s small smile earned Jinhee’s curiosity as she found the statement a rather peculiar and sort of inappropriate description of Wooseok’s situation. In fact, instead of _lucky,_ she thought _unfortunate_ was the right word for it.

“Lucky… How is he lucky?” Jinhee asked.

“He gets to stay with your family, even though it may be temporary.” The boy chuckled. “He’s not the only one in this world who has that problem, you know? He’s lucky that he has another family to take him in, while other people may have to face everything alone. He has you as his savior.”

Jinhee was dumbfounded as if the new, positive point of view had just flicked her eyes open and showed her a peek of sunray through the dark clouds.

“Oh… I never thought of it that way.” A genuine happy smile found its way to her lips, happy to realize she had been quite a help. “You know, I’m not his savior. It was all because my family accepted him with open arms. Ah, I just feel so grateful to have caring and warm-hearted people as my family.” She giggled. “They really treat him like a part of us! My mom has been feeding him everything, if this continues, we’ll see chubby Wooseokie soon!”

Imagining the adorable, chubby version of Wooseok drew out a hearty laugh from Jinhee that Yohan couldn’t help but admire. Yet, as a guy, he couldn’t ignore that sense of defeat creeping around the corner.

It was getting too hard for him to keep his thought to himself. “He’s also lucky to be around you all the time.”

Jinhee’s grin faded as she blinked at the other. “Eh?” _Did I hear him wrong?_

“Well… After spending hours sitting together at school, you go back together and keep seeing each other at home. Even before you sleep and after you wake up.” A bittersweet look surfaced on Yohan’s face. “He’s really the luckiest guy. I envy him.”

Jinhee wasn’t sure what she was feeling about his statement, but it surely didn’t feel like the best feeling. Why? She didn’t know. Perhaps, the fact that Yohan could have such thoughts – and the somewhat possessive tone in his voice – caught her a little off guard. Did he _want_ to be in Wooseok’s position? To be _that_ close to her? If so, why didn’t she feel good about her _crush_ having such thought? About the possibility of him feeling _jealous_?

Somehow she couldn’t bring herself to picture having another boy in her home. Perhaps, having Wooseok around had quickly started to feel normal and natural to her.

“Well,” she shrugged and smiled, “he’s not with me right now.”

“Yeah.” Yohan shrugged as well.

“I may be wrong about this,” Jinhee said again, “but I don’t think he sees it that way. Feeling lucky to be around _me._ I mean, he’s staying with me _not_ for that reason, you know? And besides… I’m sure he’d feel luckier to live with his own _happy_ family, if only he had that choice.”

Yohan became uneasy, on one hand finding it amusing how Jinhee was completely oblivious to Wooseok’s crush on her, but on the other hand feeling like he had made a mistake by making his own feelings _a little_ too obvious so soon. Had he just blown his chance?

“I must’ve sounded so shallow just now.” He let out a bitter chuckle. “I’m sorry.”

Jinhee gasped, and then laughed. “Why are you apologizing? No, that’s not shallow. It’s good to learn each other’s way of thinking, isn’t it?”

_Phew, that was close,_ she thought. If Yohan really was about to go _that_ way, starting things by letting his jealousy slip out, she wasn’t ready to follow his pace.

Yohan’s phone buzzed in his pocket and he drew it out immediately. There was a new short message from his cousin.

_“Wait in my room, I’ll be there in 10 mins.”_

“Oh, she’s on her way! She’ll be here soon,” Yohan piped up. “But... she told us to wait in her room. Are you okay with that?”

Jinhee was nervous all of a sudden. She had been curious about Yohan’s cousin, though, so she answered with an excited nod. “S-Sure! Should we get going now?”

It was obviously the first time she entered an apartment room alone with a boy – she couldn’t stop being fidgety even though she believed nothing much would happen. Yohan wasn’t any better. There were messy traces of scattered items that apparently had been left while his cousin had been rushing; it made him somewhat uncomfortable to bring the girl further in past the door, but he couldn’t focus on that because he was too worried that the other might hear his heartbeat in that dead silence. She couldn’t, of course.

“Wow, this place is so comfy.” Jinhee flew her gaze around the cozy sitting area, and the open kitchen on the other side of the room. It wasn’t the biggest space, but the way things were arranged gave off a spacious and roomy feel. She especially liked the colorful and feminine decorations, they made it obvious that the place belonged to a bright and cheerful girl. And perhaps a sloppy one, judging by all the mess.

“This place isn’t in the best condition.” Yohan laughed as he kicked some dumped clothes off their way, sneakily snatching an empty beer can that he spotted by the TV and tossing it into the trash. “Aish, sorry for the mess! My cousin is— Let’s just sit… over there.”

Instead of following Yohan to the couches, naturally Jinhee began to gather all the clothes off the floor and neatly fold them up.

“J-Jinhee, what are you doing?? Just let them be!” Yohan looked at the scene in horror and rushed back to the other, trying to stop her. “You’re our guest! Why are you cleaning up??”

Jinhee laughed. “No, it’s fine, I like cleaning up! Since I can’t give your cousin anything in return for the dress and shoes, I’ll just help her with this mess.” She piled the folded shirts up into a neat stack and placed them on the nightstand, and then proceeded to put all the beer cans and takeout food containers into the trash. Knowing that he couldn’t stop her, Yohan opted to help her instead, so she wouldn’t do so much and could finish quickly. Once they were done, the place felt much more comfortable and decent to live in.

The pure happy grin on Jinhee’s beaming face sent Yohan’s heart fluttering; he realized how smitten he was, he thought he was screwed. He couldn’t even hide it from showing in his eyes.

Feeling the intense gaze on the side of her face, still grinning, Jinhee’s eyes slowly shifted to the nervous boy.

Their eye contact gave them the most awkward sensation they had ever felt in the short seventeen years of their lives.

_BANG!_

“Holy cow!” Yohan shrieked and Jinhee jumped in surprise as the door was kicked open with a loud sound.

“HELL-LOWWWW, NEWLYWED COUPLE!”

A short-haired pretty girl in her early twenties barged in with a cowboy hat on her head. Jinhee blinked in confusion and Yohan pinched the bridge of his nose as the awaited cousin slipped between them and threw her arms around their shoulders. Her breath reeked of alcohol.

“How’s it going? Were you getting on _it_? Whoa, I must have interrupted something hot!” She burst into husky laughter.

“I should’ve seen this coming.” Yohan mumbled, rubbing his whole cringing face before putting on a very forced smile. “Jinhee, this is my cousin, Kim Yena. Noona, this is Cha Jinhee.”

“Oh!” Snapping back to her senses, Jinhee gave a polite bow and a bright smile. “Hello, nice to meet you! Thank you so much for this dress and these shoes, you really didn’t have to give me anything!”

Yena laughed and clapped her hands. “A cutie goody two shoes! Yohan, your taste is still the same, huh? Good choice, I like her.”

Yohan winced in utter embarrassment. “I’m sorry,” he apologized to Jinhee, “she’s not like this when she’s sober.”

“Oh, what are you saying? I am sober right now!” Yena slurred and giggled as she ushered the younger teens to the sitting area. “Why am I not stepping on my clothes? Did you kids clean up for me? Oh my, I’m sure it wasn’t Yohanie’s idea. Was it you? Cho Jinhee?”

“Cha Jinhee,” Yohan corrected.

“Cha, yeah, Chacha, was it you? Gosh, once again my dear cousin has found the perfect wife material! Is he going to let her go _again_? We’ll find out on the next episode, ladies and gentlemen!” Yena snickered as she plopped down into her yellow beanbag. “Ahh, you know, as a good cousin, I just wanted to support Yohanie. So I got you all that stuff for your first date tonight. Since he screwed up the last one two years ago, he needs extra push for a new one! Last time he was just fifteen, though, cute and dumb and all!”

“Noona!” Yohan whispered loudly and shot his guffawing cousin a horrified look. From the looks of it, he was going to get the embarrassment of his life for sure. He turned to their somewhat uncomfortable guest and gave an apologetic look. “Jinhee, do you want to leave now? We can leave now, let’s go.”

Despite feeling curious about Yohan’s past, Jinhee never really liked being around a drunk person, especially the loud ones. She didn’t think the cousin was too much to handle, though. At least not _yet._ But poor Yohan seemed so scared that all his embarrassing secrets might be spilled all at once.

“Hey, why rushing? Don’t be so rude! We haven’t even started talking about the real stuff!” Yena’s complaint got Jinhee to shake her head at Yohan, making him drop his butt back in his seat. He sighed in defeat.

So, the teens had no choice but to put up with the drunk older girl for the next one and a half hours. Some small secrets were spilled, but Yohan managed to stop his cousin whenever she was about to go too far. He was constantly alert and on edge all the time – Jinhee found that kind of adorable.

But no matter how hard she tried to keep herself present in the moment, Jinhee couldn’t deny that her mind had long wandered off to the place she called home – where a particular boy was probably showering after his long day at school, or maybe he was done showering, rubbing off his fresh and manly scent on the bed in her guest room. Maybe he was there alone, or maybe her brother was bugging him again. Had he finished his project? Had he not? Had he gone all the way home alone or had Seungyoun accompanied him? She couldn’t stop wondering about all of that.

When she started to grow tired of being stuck there, she could only think of one thing; _I should’ve stayed with Wooseok. I wish I were home with him right now._

It was getting pretty late, but Yohan was kind enough to walk her all the way home that night. He wouldn’t risk letting his drunk cousin drive them in that state. In fact, he felt like walking her home wasn’t enough to make up for the _torture_ they had gone through. The boy wouldn’t stop apologizing until the moment they arrived outside Jinhee’s house.

“I guess you won’t even think of going out with me again.” Yohan pouted sadly.

“Oh, Yohan… Aren’t you going to stop beating yourself up?” Jinhee chuckled, patting the boy’s arm. “It was a nice dinner, though. I had a good time with you. Just… It’s that…” Jinhee struggled to find the right words to say. “Ah, I’d love to spend time with you again, of course, but… I-I can’t promise you anything. I mean, I don’t know if things will happen as what your cousin expects. Aish… No matter how I say it, I still sound like a horrible person. I’m saying all this while wearing nice stuff she gave me, after you’ve treated me to a nice dinner.”

Jinhee’s voice faded into annoyed mumbles as her guilt grew stronger, until Yohan put his index finger on his own lips.

“Sshh. It’s okay.” He offered a sad smile. “That dinner, that dress, those shoes aren’t for making you promise me anything. I really don’t ask for anything in return, you know that, right? I just… wanted to spend time with you.”

Yohan’s sad puppy gaze tugged at Jinhee’s heartstrings. “You’re really a good guy, Yohan.” She opened her arms and took him into a hug – not anything that felt more than a friendly gesture. She pulled back and shot her best smile, failing to notice how Yohan’s hands had reached out a little at the loss of contact. “Thank you for tonight. Be safe on your way home, okay? I’ll see you on Monday.”

Yohan nodded, yet his feet refused to move. Jinhee was puzzled for a brief moment until a suggestion came into her mind. “Ah, do you… want to come in?” _He’s come all the way here, I can’t just send him home, can I? Should I let him meet Mom and Dad?_ She thought. _They might be asleep, though._

Yohan shook his head fervently. “N-No, it’s late. I don’t want to bother your family.” He shifted his eyes to the house. “Just… please tell them I’m sorry for returning you this late. And… please say hi to Junho and Wooseok for me.”

_Right… Wooseok._ A grin instantly bloomed on Jinhee’s face as soon as she remembered there was Wooseok inside.

“Sure will!” Jinhee gave two thumbs up and giggled. Yohan decided not to hold her back any longer; he gave an affectionate smile and a small wave before walking away into the night.

“Take care!” Jinhee yelled, and Yohan made an ‘OK’ sign with his fingers without turning his head. She was starting to worry when by chance a taxi came and stopped in front of her neighbor’s house. A middle-aged lady came out and beamed at the sight of her.

“Oh, Cha Jinhee! You look so pretty tonight!” the neighbor grinned and waved at the polite bowing girl before entering her house across the street. Jinhee ran to the taxi immediately and asked the driver to go after Yohan.

When the taxi stopped next to the lone boy, he flew his gaze back to the girl who was still outside the gate, and thanked her with a genuine smile. Jinhee didn’t leave her spot until he was gone from her sight.

Before that night, she had believed that the night spent with Kim Yohan would be the best night in her life. He had been her secret crush for almost a year after all. But then that she had earned what she had dreamed of, somehow she found her heart _almost_ indifferent in his presence. Had her feelings changed?

_I’m sorry, Yohan… I don’t understand my own heart._

* * *

Wooseok tossed and turned in bed, alone in the dark guest room. It was fifteen minutes to ten at night, but the girl he was anxiously waiting for was yet to come home. He could vaguely hear her parents fussing about it in the living room.

Wooseok pulled the cover up to his chin and curled into a ball, hugging his toy fox. No, he wasn’t on Woo mode; it was just that the fox was the closest thing that could represent her at the moment.

_What could they be doing right now?_ He pouted. _If it was just a dinner, she’s supposed to be back by now… Should I really trust Yohan?_

Eventually the adults’ voices subsided, and everything became silent. The old, familiar sense of loneliness was creeping at the door.

Except that the door then swung open, causing the boy to jolt up and turn in anticipation – just to find that it was the youngest of the family. He hid his disappointment behind a small smile.

“Hyung, not asleep yet?” Junho asked, standing at the door until Wooseok motioned him to come in.

Junho sat by the edge of the bed, seeming pretty anxious. “You look so tired. Are you okay?”

Wooseok nodded and smiled. “Don’t worry.”

“Hyung…” Junho bit his index finger, contemplating. “I want to tell you something. But before that, can I ask?”

Now, Wooseok had a bad feeling. “S-Sure. What is it about?”

After spending the next few seconds fidgeting and mumbling to himself, the younger spat it out, “Do you like my sister?”

Wooseok felt like he had just been shot the second time. He was asked the exact same question twice in a day; it made him start to wonder if everyone actually knew about it.

“Ah, it doesn’t sound right.” Junho tapped his own lips and shook his head. “It’s not what you think, hyung. Just… I just need to make sure whether I should tell you this or not. If you don’t have any feelings, then it’s none of your concern.”

Wooseok turned his head away and gulped down his embarrassment. “T-Tell me, please.”

Junho gawked for what seemed like forever, until Wooseok cleared his throat and made him snap back to reality.

“Ah… So, you _do_ like her too.” The younger nodded. “Then it’s good that I decided to ask. Um, how to say this…? I-I don’t want to be siding with anyone. If I help one person and not the other too, I’ll feel bad about it. As Jinhee noona’s brother, I’ll try what I can do to help guys who want to approach her, as long as I’m sure they’re good guys who deserve to be helped.”

Wooseok returned his gaze back to the younger boy, observing his jittery movements while he tried to comprehend the hidden meaning behind those words.

“Have you been… helping someone?” Wooseok asked, his tone soft and careful.

Junho nodded fervently. “It’s Yohan hyung.”

Wooseok’s heart skipped a beat at the sudden reveal of the name. He totally hadn’t seen it coming – apparently his _friendly_ rival had taken big steps forward while he hadn’t been aware of it.

Wooseok was just glad that the surprise wasn’t enough to trigger Wooshin out. Perhaps, even Wooshin thought it was nothing Wooseok couldn’t handle.

Without being asked to, Junho proceeded to spill the secret. “I’ve been telling him what my noona is up to, where she is, what she’s doing, and whom she’s with. I also told him some basic information, like her favorite food and hobbies, all that stuff. He knows some things that happened between noona and you too. I-I let him know all of this, because… because as far as I know… Jinhee noona has had a crush on him too since they were classmates last year.”

Junho’s voice was barely audible at the end of his sentence, noticing how Wooseok’s face visibly changed, reflecting the new broken part of his heart.

“B-But!” Junho added quickly, “After you’ve moved here, I can see that she likes to be around you too. She might have liked Yohan hyung so much last year, but I can’t say that it’s still the same right now! Wooseok hyung, don’t be sad. I’m telling you this because I want to help you too.”

He leaned closer and threw his arms around the older boy. “I’m really sorry, hyung. Sometimes I feel like I’ve committed a crime after telling Yohan hyung everything. Now if I only help him, that means I choose him over you for my sister, while that’s not what I want to do. She can choose, not me.”

Doubtfully, Wooseok encircled his arms around the younger, answering to his hug. “Won’t he get mad at you for telling me this?”

“Don’t worry, I’ve asked for his permission. Ah, actually… He’s the one who told me that you also like my sister. But I had to hear it directly from you. I was surprised when he told me, and I asked, ‘Shouldn’t I help Wooseok hyung too?’ and he told me I should, if you want to be helped… He said it was because he had made a deal with you to make things fair.”

Wooseok was relieved. After all, it wasn’t a wrong decision to open up to Yohan; he was a guy of his word. It was just unfortunate that their hearts aimed at the same target.

“Thank you, Junho. I’ll also thank Yohan later.” Wooseok patted the younger’s back.

Junho pulled away and flashed an innocent smile. “Be a little more confident, hyung. That should be the first thing to do. If you look at the mirror closely, you’ll see that you’re not less than Yohan hyung.”

_Be confident._ Wooseok took the advice into mind.

“I’ll let you rest now. Tomorrow you can ask me anything, okay, hyung? Have a nice sleep.”

The door was opened and closed, and once again Wooseok was left alone curling under the cover, but this time with more mess jumbled up in his head.

_Jinhee noona has had a crush on him too._

Wooseok was quickly losing the last drips of his confidence.

_Be a little more confident._

_You’re not less than Yohan hyung._

The more he thought about it, the harder it was for him to believe that. Feeling helpless, Wooseok heaved a deep sigh and let his heavy eyelids give in to his drowsiness.

Less than five minutes later, though, the door was opened once again, yet no other sounds followed after.

“What is it, Junho?” Wooseok mumbled, not even bothering to open his eyes and turn around. He heard the sound of the door being closed, followed by approaching light footsteps. The mattress shifted and bounced a little as an extra weight was added onto the edge.

Just when a hand came and brushed through his hair, did Wooseok crack his eyes open and sit up straight to see who it was.

“You’re still awake even after that project?”

Wooseok was so close to crying. Even with minimum illumination of the faint moonlight seeping through the window, he could discern the silhouette of the feminine figure, looking so pretty in a dress. When he switched the bedside lamp on, he found his favorite smile and dimples plastered on his favorite girl’s face, greeting him so brightly like the morning sun.

He couldn’t stop his own eyes from gazing at her lips. Seungyoun’s teasing at the library resounded in the back of his head.

“J-Jinhee…”

In a blink of an eye, he captured the girl in his embrace and held her close in a possessive manner. His heart was leaping like crazy, but he fought hard to ignore it.

_Be confident, be confident… If Wooshin can hug her, so can I._

Jinhee was frozen, her arms remaining on her sides, creating all sorts of negative thoughts in Wooseok’s mind.

_I… I must have crossed the line. I must be making her uncomfortable._

And yet, when he was about to retreat, those arms held him from moving away and pulled him back into the hug. Their chests bumped against each other and Wooseok found himself unable to breathe – he felt like bursting into tiny pieces.

“Ah… I thought it would be really fun out there, but a Friday night like this is much more comfortable.” Jinhee rested her cheek on the stunned boy’s shoulder, her hand sliding up his back to his bony shoulderblade. She closed her eyes feeling her own heart beat against the boy’s chest.

“How was your evening with Seungyoun? Did you miss me?” She threw a mischievous, teasing question, which sounded like a challenge to Wooseok’s confidence. Of course she wasn’t expecting a serious answer.

But a serious answer was what she got.

Wooseok placed his shaky hand on her head and exhaled an equally shaky sigh.

“I… I m-missed you.”

Taken aback, Jinhee lifted her head off Wooseok’s shoulder slowly and looked into his doe eyes. But those eyes were not looking back into hers.

“…Are you staring at my lips?” Jinhee stretched her lips into a playful smile, causing Wooseok to snap back to his senses.

“I-I-I’m sorry.” Wooseok looked down and fidgeted aggressively with his fingers.

Jinhee couldn’t help but chuckle at the adorable little gestures. “You want a kiss?” She teased just a little further. The reaction she got made her burst into satisfied laughter.

Wooseok’s eyes were wide as saucers and his mouth opened and closed in panic. “N-No, that’s not it! I-I-I-I—”

“Sshh.” Jinhee put her index finger on the other’s lips. “My parents are asleep already.”

Just after getting a nod, Jinhee pressed her thumb on her own lips, and then moved the finger to Wooseok’s cheek for an indirect kiss.

A round of his heavy breathing began.

“I-I-I—”

“Gosh, looks like we’ll need some oxygen tanks around here.” Jinhee giggled and made her way out of the room, leaving Wooseok alone to stare at the ceiling and grin like a fool.

_My heart…_ _It’s going crazy._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It went much longer than I planned lol tbh I got stuck on Yohan's parts... I wanted to give him more moments but somehow I just screwed their night out because I'm team #JinWoo lmao but!!! expect some twists ahead ;))) if you've been following this story, thank you so much, especially you guys who left kudos I'm glad if y'all enjoy this stuff. Wait for the next chapter, some fluff coming your way!


	11. Chapter 11

* * *

Despite being a busy person, Doctor Cha didn’t forget his promise to his new patient; that Saturday, he took Wooseok along with the whole family to a famous amusement park.

Going with Jinhee and Junho alone would’ve been enough for Wooseok, but the father had a different intention – if they all went together, the boy would know what it felt like to go to a theme park with family, and the happiness it would bring was surely going to be different from going out with friends.

“Mom, Dad, can we buy these?” Junho pointed at a rack of headbands with animal ears once they entered a gift shop. When he turned to his parents, the couple already had one on each of their heads – the father with yellow tiger ears, and the mother with a red polka-dot bow.

“ _Aigoo_ , look how pretty my wife is. I feel like a teenager all over again!” Their father laughed and kissed his giggling wife on the cheek.

“Oh, you and your sweeth mouth.” The mother gave him a playful slap on the chest.

Upon witnessing the middle-aged couple’s cheesiness, Jinhee and Wooseok’s eyes met in an unintentional eye contact. Both teens got startled and quickly looked away pretending to be busy looking at stuff.

“Hyung, noona, look!” Junho came with two identical headbands with orange and white pointy ears, which looked like a fox’s. He himself had white tiger ears on his head. “Since you both are already wearing matching shirts, you should wear matching headbands too.”

Jinhee and Wooseok looked down, and just then did they realize that they were both wearing light blue t-shirts and light blue jeans, except that Jinhee’s pants were short. Without waiting for their approval, Junho put the headbands on their heads for them, then fished out his phone and snapped a picture of them.

“Perfect!” He laughed and walked away, busy tapping on his phone screen.

“Junho, kiddo, you’d better not do anything with that picture. I haven’t even seen it!” Jinhee chased her younger brother and fought the giggling boy for his phone. Wooseok couldn’t help but giggle seeing the siblings play cat and mouse around the gift shop that was quite crowded. “Wooseok, give me a hand!”

“Too late, it’s posted already!” Junho raised his phone high in the air and laughed at his sister’s horrified face.

Jinhee gasped. “Posted WHERE?”

“On my Insta story.” Junho flashed an innocent smile. He checked his phone to see if anyone had seen the post. “Oh, Yohan hyung has seen it! So fast.”

Hearing Yohan’s name made Wooseok scrurry to the siblings to see it himself. Eleven views in the first minute, and Yohan was on top of the viewers list above some girls from their school. The picture showed Jinhee and Wooseok stand facing each other in front of the headband shelf, but with their wide eyes glancing at the camera, looking adorably dumbfounded and absolutely unprepared. Junho had added a text on it, _“At Lotte World with my cute noona @jinny.chacha, cutie Woooseokie hyung, mom, and dad! Family time~ ♡♡♡♡”_

“Oh my God, I can’t believe you.” Jinhee flicked her brother’s forehead while Wooseok silently went on panic mode.

“Ow!” Junho laughed and rubbed his forehead. His phone then chimed, catching their full attention. “Oh, Yohan hyung replied to my story!”

“He did??” Jinhee and Wooseok asked in unison.

Junho opened his direct message, and then showed it to the other two.

_“Have fun, you guys! Take lots of pics and post them later ^^”_

“He’s not mad. Hehe.” Junho grinned. Jinhee and Wooseok exhaled in relief.

“Kids, hurry and bring what you want to buy! We have so much to explore today,” the mother’s cheerful voice called from the cashier.

As they walked around the indoor amusement park, Wooseok had that innocent twinkle in his round eyes, looking at even the little things in wonder. They began to try one ride, two rides, and a pure, child-like happy smile gradually grew bigger and bigger on his face. Some rides made him break loose and release the kind of screams and shrieks that he himself had never heard before, making the whole Cha family laugh so much and love him more for that – he was a funny kid after all.

“Hyung, are you afraid of ghosts?” Junho asked the older boy.

Wooseok thought he had seen much scarier things than ghosts. Like his uncle, for example. “Nope.”

Jinhee was afraid of such things, though, and as a good brother, Junho knew that really well. Since they were still quite far away from the haunted house anyway, with a naughty smile that he couldn’t hide, Junho looked around scanning for an attraction that he could use to test the other boy.

“Ah, there!” He pointed at one with a sign that said _‘Jungle Adventure’._ The family had been there more than once anyway, so they knew what it was like, and thus they also knew what Junho was trying to do when he pulled an exaggerated face and whispered to Wooseok, “I heard recently they’ve put hidden ghosts in there, and they’re really scary!” Suddenly he gripped Wooseok’s arm for a jumpscare effect that successfully made him yelp in surprise. The Cha family cackled as he whined and held his chest.

“I-I don’t usually get scared of ghosts, really! I just get surprised,” he tried to defend himself, waving his hands around adorably.

So, they entered a dark tunnel and immediately found human statues inside, realistic ones that looked like they were sitting and talking to each other in an old room. Wooseok thought they weren’t scary, not at all, but it seemed like Junho’s little jumpscare somehow had managed to get him paranoid and always on alert in case a ghost would suddenly jump out. They were guided by the staff to get on a round boat that consisted of six seats – one of them was left empty.

The boat began to move along with the water stream.

“W-Whoa, it’s moving fast.” Wooseok gripped the edge of the seat as the boat wobbled and bumped the side walls of the river, mumbling to himself, “It’s so dark… Is something going to come out?” There were more statues and decorations in form of huge plants and many other shapes, illuminated by neon lights along the way.

Junho’s evil self jumped out. “Something is going to come out soon. Watch above, hyung, a ghost might catch your head.” The family suppressed their giggles as Wooseok ducked his head down and his round alert eyes went up making him look like a scared kitten.

Suddenly Junho gripped Wooseok’s shoulder to shock him and exclaimed, “Ghost! Behind you, hyung!”

“Aahhh!” Wooseok’s normally deep voice cracked into a high-pitched shriek, causing the other four’s laugh to boom in the dark tunnel.

However, Jinhee’s laugh was more of a restrained one as a hand had caught her smaller one and clutched it in a tight grip – Wooseok was unconsciously holding her hand as if his life depended on it. It didn’t last long, though, because he retracted his hand back and used it to cover his mad blushing face as soon as the realization hit him.

The poor embarrassed boy refused to reveal his face to the giggling family until the ride came to an end. There were no ghosts at all.

“Are you okay?” Jinhee chuckled at Wooseok’s pouty face when they walked to the next ride.

“I’m really not afraid of ghosts.” He still insisted.

Jinhee’s little chuckle turned into a full laugh. “Yeah, of course you’re not. I totally believe that.”

The family decided it would be best not to go to the haunted house at all.

Since Jinhee was afraid of heights, she couldn’t get on some rides and therefore had to stay back with her mother while Junho and their father dragged Wooseok along with them.

“Today is the only chance you can scream all you want, son!” The middle-aged man laughed heartily as they made their way to a very tall ride, with a big round platform with many seats around it that was slowly going up to the top. Wooseok winced and whimpered as that platform dropped all of a sudden at high speed, causing everyone on it to scream at the top of their lungs. Suddenly he felt his guts twist.

_Wooshin, please come out, please come out,_ Wooseok chanted in his head, _I’ll let you take over for a week, please come out now!_

Wooshin didn’t come out.

“Don’t be scared, hyung! It’s a short ride, one drop and it’s done!” Junho giggled excitedly as they took a seat on the ride.

At the peak, they could see not just the view of the theme park, but also the view of the city that spread far towards the horizon.

_Right, Jinhee would pass out if she sees this,_ Wooseok thought. He didn’t have the chance to admire the view for too long before they were dropped from that extreme height all of a sudden. He squeezed his eyes shut feeling his insides move against the gravity.

Right, as Junho said, it ended so fast. Wooseok didn’t even scream. The moment he returned back to Jinhee and her mother, though, his breakfast from earlier that morning poured out all at once.

“Holy cow.” Jinhee gawked, and then proceeded to dig her backpack for her water bottle along with some tissue. Her mother snatched them from her hands and helped the boy out so lovingly like his own mother.

“ _Aigoo_ , _aigoo_ , my poor boy! That’s enough rides for you, let’s just find a place to sit, okay?” The lady wet some sheets of tissue and dabbed them on Wooseok’s lips, then held the bottle for him to drink from. She kept on caressing his hair and his back in a soothing, motherly manner, making the boy all shy and smiley from all the display of affection. He was just like a kitten, Jinhee thought.

They spent the rest of the day walking around, buying snacks, playing arcades, and buying some more snacks. At one point, Junho became upset with some Pokemon claw machines that constantly failed him. “I knew it, my friends said these machines were rigged!” He huffed.

Then, Wooseok sheepishly asked, “Can I try once?”

In one try on the same machine, he won an adorable Squirtle plushie. The parents joined Jinhee clapping and cheering for him.

“Whoa, Kim Wooseok is awesome!” Jinhee gave two thumbs up, laughing as she noticed Junho’s pout.

“It must be just luck. I wanna try once again!” The youngest said.

The father let both boys try once again – Junho won nothing, and Wooseok won an Eevee plushie. They cackled at Junho’s miserable blank face.

“This is for you.” Wooseok offered his blue turtle Pokemon plushie to the younger boy, and then the fox Pokemon to the sister. “And this is for Jinhee.”

The Cha family looked at him adoringly. “Son, you won them. You can have them,” the father said, giving the boy a proud pat on the shoulder.

Wooseok chuckled and shook his head. “Woo already has too many. I want to give these to Junho and Jinhee.”

So, the siblings took their free prizes and gave Wooseok their cutest smiles in return. To him, those were far more rewarding than the plushies.

Their last ride that day was a classic one – the carousel. Junho was not kidding when he said he would help Wooseok too, like he had helped Yohan – just in a different way this time. While his parents had been seated on a pair of white horses, and he himself next to them, he managed to make Jinhee and Wooseok sit next to each other on the horses behind them while he became their sudden photographer as if it was a prewedding photoshoot.

Junho turned facing backward on his horse and aimed his phone camera at the two older teens. “Hyung, noona, look at the camera! Say cheese! Smile bigger, hyung, you’re not taking a picture for your ID card!” He snapped a perfect picture right when Jinhee burst into laughter and Wooseok cracked a bashful grin. “Perfect, now look at each other! That’s right, hold it like that! Wow, I have to take this from different angles. Whoa, awesome, what did I do to deserve these pretty people in my life? I should be your personal photographer. Please hire me when you’re going to get married.”

Jinhee rolled her eyes and chuckled at her brother’s comments, while Wooseok pressed his small lips together, trying his best not to show a big toothy smile. As Junho bent his body side to side, taking similar pictures with different angles, the shy pair found themselves drawn to each other’s gaze, stuck in a prolonged eye contact even as their horses took turns slowly going up and down. It wasn’t easy on Wooseok’s side – his heart rate was escalating behind his calm demeanor. The cheerful music of the carousel eventually faded in his ears as he sank further into the pair of bright brown eyes, glazed and shiny like chocolate balls, reflecting the warm yellow lights of the ride.

He thought he was the only one feeling the thrill of it.

“Ah, the chemistry is starting to show in these pictures!” Junho threw another comment. “Hyung, noona, try a more obvious interaction! Can you hold hands?”

“Oh my God.” Jinhee broke the eye contact and looked away as she laughed nervously and puffed her cheeks, secretly trying to cool herself down. Wooseok was not in any better state. “What are you going to do with such photos, Junho? Are you going to start a new rumor at school?”

“Maybe.” Junho flashed his innocent grin and eye smile. “And besides, Wooseok hyung looks really happy in these pictures. It’s an extra rare chance to get photos of hyung smiling like this! We’ve gotta get an even bigger smile! Mom, dad, it’s fine if they just hold hands, right?”

The parents, who had been busy being flirty with each other like a young couple, turned their heads and smiled adoringly at the shy kids.

“Of course,” the father said, “it’s not like your noona would get pregnant just from holding hands.”

“Dad!” Jinhee yelled in embarrassment while her parents laughed. A tinge of red spread to the tips of Wooseok’s ears – his imagination might have flown a little too far.

“Come on, hold hands before this ride ends,” Junho whined, pouting and wiggling like a sulking kid on his horse.

“A-Ah, o-okay—Is it okay?” Wooseok asked for Jinhee’s approval. Ever so shyly, he offered his hand to the girl next to him.

Jinhee didn’t let the hand wait for too long. Ignoring her unusual erratic heartbeat that she couldn’t understand, she let their fingers intertwine together and shot him a bright, sincere happy grin. Wooseok was stunned.

It was enough for them; they didn’t have to understand what they were feeling. The innocent moment that not only brought out the child-like selves in them, yet also wrapped them in the comfort and the fuzzy warmth of the not-so-child-like feelings that they were both still trying to learn.

“It’s true. It’s so rare.” Jinhee smiled, squeezing and swinging the other’s bigger hand back and forth. “This kind of smile… You’re the prettiest when you smile.”

_I should be the one to say that,_ Wooseok thought, yet he was too shy to say it out loud.

“Let’s only smile and be happy from now on, okay, Kim Wooseok?”

At that moment, Wooseok only wished he could do what the parents did after – giving each other a small peck on the lips. Would he ever be able to get the kiss he had been secretly thinking of a bit too much lately?

Later, they found outdoor photo spots and took many cute pictures together. Junho posted them on his social media right away, while Jinhee chose to send them to Wooseok first, so when he saw those pictures, they would remain as a new page of the family album in his memory.

On the way home, and later that night in bed, Wooseok couldn’t stop thinking of a particular photo that they had taken. It was the picture that he was anticipating the most, but hadn’t been sent by Jinhee yet.

_She’s done sending the pictures, though… Maybe she missed that one. Or was it deleted? Should I… ask her about it?_

Wooseok grabbed his phone and contemplated for a good minute before opening his chat room with Jinhee. He hadn’t even typed anything, but his ears were already turning red.

_“Jinhee… Um, I think there’s another pic left. ^^;”_

He sent his message and immediately put his phone away like it was burning hot. He held his thumping heart and gaped at the ceiling. Then, his eyes shifted to the clock on the wall.

_11:11 PM._

“Ah… Why did I ask for it at this hour? She’ll know that I keep thinking about it. She must be asleep, though…”

_Ding!_ His phone chimed and it was right away back in his hands. A new message from Jinhee made him start to quiver in nervousness and excitement – he didn’t want to open the message right after it came in, but his clumsy hand opened it by accident anyway.

_“Really? Which pic?”_

Wooseok chewed on his bottom lip, feeling like he wouldn’t be able to answer that one. It was too embarrassing to him.

For a moment there, he thought Jinhee had actually forgotten about it, but the mischievous sticker that followed her message confirmed that she was just teasing him again. Wooseok smiled shyly and covered his face with the blanket.

_“At the photo spot with that big pink heart… The selfie.”_

He added a shy peach sticker. Jinhee answered with a laughing one.

_“Thought you’d never ask for it!”_

After the reply, the image Wooseok had been waiting for finally came, making him gasp and cup his warm cheeks. He opened and saved it immediately.

That picture was his very first selfie with Jinhee, or with anyone in general, could be seen from how awkward his smile was. Jinhee had made him part his legs a little and lower down so she could wrap her arm around his neck comfortably, but of course the picture showed just their upper parts, with a huge pink and white heart in the background. In the picture, Jinhee had her head tilted towards him, winking and showing off her pretty smile along with her dimples. Her long wavy hair that had been tied into low pigtails made her look adorable. Anyone who saw that picture might think they were a couple, because of their same-colored shirts and the matching fox ears on their heads. The warm yellow sunlight that brightened up their radiant, happy smiley faces completed everything in that picture.

The lovestruck boy breathed out a contented sigh and smiled at the ceiling, holding his phone to his chest. He felt like the happiest fool.

Another message from Jinhee came.

_“Let’s take more pictures together~ Tomorrow we can have lots of them :)_ _”_

And they really did. Sunday came, and they had their second round of family trip to places Wooseok wanted to visit; a water park and a chinese hotpot restaurant. The moment they came back home, Jinhee had sent a little over a hundred new pictures to him. Wooseok saved them all because he thought Jinhee was exceptionally pretty and radiant that day. Especially at the water park. He liked her in that light blue bikini.

Not in a pervy way, he swore.

“It’s too bad that you can’t remember,” Jinhee said that night. After the others had gone to bed, she sneaked into Wooseok’s room and caught him staring at their pictures together, and after a whole ten minutes of teasing the life out of him about it, she was then lying on her belly, chin propped up in her hand, a mischievous smile on her lips. The only light left on in the room was the nightstand lamps.

Wooseok was puzzled. “Remember what?”

“The first time we went swimming together.” Jinhee laughed when a funny shocked expression took over Wooseok’s face.

“W-Was today not the first time??” Wooseok gawked in horror.

“Nope.” Jinhee shook her head and grinned. “The first time was at your uncle’s house. Just us alone.” She looked away and pouted, pretending to be upset. “I didn’t even have my swimwear with me. But _you_ made me swim in my underwear.”

Jinhee made sure to emphasize the _‘you’_ , even though it had been Wooshin instead of Wooseok. She was secretly enjoying the boy’s pure, funny reactions so much.

“E-Ehh?? I did? W-Why did I do that? Ah, oh no, I’m… I’m so sorry.” Wooseok buried his flushed face into his palms as the other’s laugh intensified. “I had a bad feeling when I found the pool filled with water, but I thought Wooshin must have swum alone… I don’t even have any memory of it.”

Giggling, Jinhee pulled the other’s hands down to see his sad pout.

“Sometimes I wish I could remember Wooshin’s memory too,” he said, “it’s… unfair.”

A thought occurred to Jinhee’s mind. “Actually, you know what? I’ve been wondering,” she said, “are your memories completely detached from each other? Like, can’t you remember at least _one_ thing that happened to Wooshin, and vice versa?”

Wooseok shook his head dejectedly. “I can’t… It’s really frustrating sometimes.”

Jinhee gave a comforting pat on the other’s hand. “Ah, but I thought Wooshin could remember what happened to you? The first time we met, when Seungyoun gave you his bread in class. On the way home that day, I ran into Wooshin and tested him by asking about that bread. I wanted to know if he and you were really the same person. But surprisingly, he knew not only about the bread, but also the water that I gave you! Doesn’t that mean he had your memory?”

Wooseok’s eyebrows creased as he drew out that particular memory from the storage in the back of his head. After a short moment, his face relaxed as he let out a small chuckle. “That was because I left him a short note on my book about what had happened. I asked him to be nice to you and the other friends.”

“Aish…” Jinhee threw a hand over her forehead. “No wonder.” Seeing the bittersweet look return to Wooseok’s face, Jinhee took his hand into a gentle, comforting squeeze. “Well, maybe someday you can remember things that happened to him. I’m sure Wooshin would like to have your memories too. You’ve been happy, right?”

Wooseok was stunned by the realization. It was a simple logic that his alter would surely feel the same, that it was also unfair to him. But it had never crossed Wooseok’s mind.

In fact, now he felt much luckier than Wooshin, so much that he wondered if Wooshin would be infuriated about it.

“I… I will find a way to share my memories with him,” he finally said.

“Maybe I can help,” Jinhee offered. “If you want, I can make it a habit to tell and show you everything that happens to Wooshin after he switches to you, and the other way around. Actually… I should’ve done that, but there are things I keep to myself.”

“I’d like that, please.” Wooseok gulped down his nervousness and mustered up his courage to ask. “So… Did something happen? While we were swimming, maybe…”

He really didn’t want his mind to go _there_ , but he knew what kind of things Wooshin would do. And to make it even worse, Seungyoun’s uninvited voice echoed in his head.

_“Has it gone beyond a friendly hug? A friendly kiss? Maybe Wooshin did, but you just don’t know.”_

Aware of Wooseok’s concern, the mischievous side of Jinhee jumped back out and refused not to tease him. “Yeah, something happened. You used my hand to touch yourself.”

The sharp high-pitched gasp that jumped out of Wooseok’s agape mouth sent Jinhee guffawing and rolling around in bed, clutching on her stomach. She was absolutely pleased with the reaction.

“I-Is that true? Did that really happen?” An unholy scene played in Wooseok’s mind. He felt like crying.

Wooseok really wished it wasn’t what it sounded like, but if it was really like _that_ … he was devastated that he had no memory of it.

He was a sexually normal teenage boy after all. Sometimes those hormones just had to do their job.

That aside, just the fact that _he_ could let someone touch his body was startling enough to him.

Once her laugh had subsided, Jinhee took Wooseok’s hand and wrapped it around hers. “It went like this.”

Wooseok’s heart palpitated in anticipation while the hand in his loose grip moved to his face, touching the parts where his scars were. Instead of the full version that he was expecting, though, it turned out to be just a short preview, as Jinhee retracted her hand and ended it with a grin.

“You showed me your scars and let me touch them. Except for those below your waist. You didn’t make me touch them, I touched them myself. So, you came up with this swimming race game with a stupid punishment where we had to take off a piece of clothing if we lost. Ah, right, we were wearing full clothes when we fell into the pool because I was chasing you. So, while you were swimming in your underwear, I saw the scars on your thighs and touched them out of curiosity. That’s what made you show me the other scars. And then, after showing me those, you hugged me in the pool.”

Wooseok took his time to develop the shortly-described story into a moving scene in his imagination. His face and ears were turning bright red. The way Jinhee used ‘ _you’_ instead of Wooshin’s name made him feel much more involved in it; he found it somehow thrilling.

“I… I thought you would say something about my scars earlier, when we were swimming. So that’s why you didn’t say anything.” Wooseok bowed his head hiding his flushed face. “It’s embarrassing.”

“Don’t be embarrassed, you still look great anyway.” Jinhee giggled. “Oh, I saw a girl staring at you earlier! She wasn’t far from us. I heard her say, ‘Wow, that face is magic.’ I almost told her to back off,” she said jokingly.

Wooseok couldn’t help but smile, already moving on from his embarrassment.

Maybe it was Wooshin stirring inside him, but he chose to dunk himself into another embarrassment right after.

“Was that girl… not _you_?”

Jinhee gawked in disbelief while the boy tossed himself down and buried himself under the blanket.

“Aahhh! Why did I say that?!” his voice went high like that of a young boy – something that always happened whenever he was embarrassed out of his mind. It never failed to make Jinhee burst into laughter.

“Hey! Was that Wooshin coming out just now?” Jinhee tried to pull the cover off, but Wooseok held it firm over his head.

“Fine, you got me. I kept looking at you too. It was annoying, but you looked really good.”

Under the blanket, a big, genuine happy smile bloomed on Wooseok’s face. He thought, if it always felt that nice to get a compliment just with a confident question, maybe he should be confident more often.

Apparently that particular characteristic of Wooshin had started to rub off on him.

Or was it Wooshin slowly fusing into him, like what he had secretly been worrying about?

_“Doctor, if this works and I can heal, does that mean… Wooshin will be gone?”_

_“…Even if he integrates into you and disappear as an active alter, he will still be there deep inside you… His strengths will be yours too, and yours will be his. You will be like him, he will be like you… you and he will be combined into one.”_

Recalling the answer from Jinhee’s father, ironically Wooseok’s happy smile became a sad one. The doctor could read him well, and he knew how to put things in less hurtful ways. Wooseok knew that there was nothing that could guarantee Wooshin’s existence – especially through the changes that might occur in the process. He knew it might sound funny, but in all honesty, he didn’t want to get rid of Wooshin anymore. He didn’t really mind sharing his body with him anymore. In fact, he wasn’t ready to be left alone. What if one day he had to face his uncle again and Wooshin wasn’t there to shield him? Or, maybe, because Wooshin was much more confident and much better at being flirty, perhaps his existence could help him win Jinhee’s heart? If Wooshin and his qualities weren’t there anymore, what else could he offer to make her look at him instead of Yohan? Would Wooseok be able to go through all of that alone?

Those endless thoughts only pointed to one thing; he’d rather have Wooshin stay as his alter than fuse with him. Yet he had no choice but to try to heal, because there was another hidden monster in him that had to be cured.

At least his heart and Wooshin’s were alike, which would play a big role in the process of them understanding and accepting each other, but Shin; he was a ruthless complete stranger whom he couldn’t understand.

Hence, Wooseok decided to let his healing process go on, with a hope that Wooshin wouldn’t rebel against him for that. He no longer had anything against his dear protector after all.

“Hey. Are you asleep? Really, Kim Wooseok? I said you looked good and you left me to sleep just like that.”

Wooseok pressed his lips together into a thin line to keep his giggle in. But then, Jinhee, thinking that he was actually asleep, lay down on her side and leaned her head on top of the lump that was Wooseok’s body under the blanket. Feeling the added weight on his side, Wooseok froze and held his breath in.

“How could you do that? It takes courage even just to say it.” Jinhee’s voice sounded like an adorable sulking little kid. It sent a loving smile to Wooseok’s lips. “You know, it can get _reeeeally_ annoying when Wooshin boasts about himself. But when it’s about his face, I always think, ‘Yeah, he’s not wrong about that.’ It’s annoying that he knows he’s handsome and talks about it a lot. But you? It’s also annoying that you think you’re nothing. It’s ridiculous. You keep looking down and hiding your face. The _same_ face that he brags about. I mean, you gotta share that nice view more often, you know. You have a nice smile, why do you always cover it? From what I see, you’re not even less handsome than Hangyul or Yohan.”

Wooseok cupped his flushed cheeks. Those compliments were getting too much for him to handle. If it had been Wooshin who had received those compliments, his head would have surely grown so big about it. He would have even said he was more handsome than those two mentioned boys.

After minutes had passed with no more words said, Jinhee began to speak again, so drowsy that she almost sounded drunk.

“You’re… _handsome_. Yup.” She murmured. “Sometimes… I get a _liiiittle_ nervous. When you’re serious, or when you focus on something… Your eyes are something else. Honestly, the first thing that helped me tell you from Wooshin was your gaze. But now… sometimes I can see you with his gaze too. Those eyes are yours after all, _riiight_? If you ask me, which one I like better… I can’t choose.”

Jinhee’s heavy eyelids opened and closed in a weak attempt to stay awake. She slurred her last words before drifting off to a deep slumber.

“I like both… Wooseok and Wooshin.”

Wooseok squeezed his eyes shut and held his chest, panting silently through his parted lips, fighting to calm his ecstatic heart. It took what felt like forever for him to finally push the cover off his head and peek at the sleeping girl. She was all curled up like a baby in her pastel yellow pajamas, mouth slightly open, hands balled into small fists. Wooseok couldn’t help but smile at the adorable sight.

“Jinhee…” He sat up carefully, lifting her head off his body just to rest it back down in his lap. “Your parents won’t like it if they find you sleeping here with me.”

Unsure how to wake her up, he tried tapping her shoulder, shaking her hand, and poking her cheek while repeatedly calling her name. It didn’t work.

“Should I… Should I carry you?” He blushed. “I-I think I’m strong enough. I have these muscles… although I didn’t build them. Wooshin did. D-Don’t worry, I won’t drop you.”

And so, with minor difficulties, Wooseok managed to scoop the girl into his arms and carry her out the room. He made sure to be extra careful while he climbed up the stairs, taking gentle yet firm steps, being extra quiet like a burglar in the middle of the night. Once he had finally entered Jinhee’s room and tucked her in bed, he inhaled as much oxygen as he could and blew out his biggest relieved sigh. A proud grin spread from ear to ear.

_I like both… Wooseok and Wooshin._

Something was missing; it felt incomplete. As Wooseok gazed at the other’s peaceful sleeping face, something stirred in his chest. He didn’t want to go back to his room just yet.

He sat on the edge of the bed, his hand on his beating heart.

“Can I…?”

A pure teenage boy, who had barely experienced love before. He had gone through impure things because of what life had forced upon him. But in his heart, he was just an innocent child who was finally growing up.

He stared at his right hand, held his thumb up, folding the other four fingers. In a clumsy, timid manner, while thinking over and over if he was doing something forbidden, he puckered his lips and pressed them onto his thumb. His hand trembled a little as he brought the finger to the girl’s face.

With that, he left an indirect kiss on the corner of her lips.

The teen boy froze for a second, and suddenly dashed all the way back to his room so he could scream and grunt into his pillow releasing his utter embarrassment.

“I did _that…_ I did _that!_ Why did I do it? _Whyyy_? Am I an immoral person?” His slender body squirmed and bounced around in bed like a worm on fire. He stopped and choked out a fake sob into his pillow. “How am I going to face her tomorrow?”

Nevertheless, the smile that eventually grew on his lips became the proof that a part of him didn’t really regret that _kiss_ after all _–_ if it could even be called a kiss.

He was joyful inside.

_I like both Wooseok and Wooshin._

Those words were going to stick forever in his head.

“I like… too… I like you too, Cha Jinhee… I’m a happy person because of you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter originally had a sad tearful part, but since it went too long, I moved that part to the next chapter. It was all fluffy here, but the next chapter's mood is going to be very different! A character who seems insignificant before will play a big role, and then there will be a big revelation about an important part of Wooseok's past in another next one following that. Ok that's the spoiler. lol thank you so much for reading this story!


	12. Chapter 12

* * *

“Hello, Mom, Dad. How are you?”

Wooseok’s nervous sweaty hand was holding his phone to his ear, his doe eyes shifting side to side, asking for encouragement from two people sitting before him in his bed – Jinhee and her father, Doctor Cha. They were there to be his trusted mental support while he tried to take a baby step forward. Giving him a little boost of courage, they shot him their brightest grins and raised their fists, mouthing a, “Fighting!” that managed to earn a small nervous smile from him.

_“Oh, Wooseokie! We’re doing really well, you don’t need to worry about anything. How are you, baby? We missed you so much,”_ a soft motherly voice answered. The father and daughter could hear it through the loud speaker. Wooseok had initiated it himself, so they could help him come up with answers when he couldn’t.

“I’m okay, Mom.” Wooseok looked down and smiled. He could visualize his mother’s pretty smile just by hearing her cheerful voice that he had missed so much. “I’ve been happy lately. I’m sorry I didn’t call you earlier.”

_“How is your health?”_ His father asked. _“We called your uncle last week and asked about you, but he said you were sick and couldn’t talk.”_

Wooseok’s smile faded away and his face lost its color at the mention of the man he feared the most. His uncle had lied to his parents, they had no idea that he had run away. Knowing his uncle, though, Wooseok knew exactly that the man didn’t like to be put in that kind of situation. He must have thrown a tantrum after the phone call with his parents.

Right, Wooseok thought he’d be dead meat if his uncle managed to find him.

“I’m… I’m fine now, Dad. Don’t worry.” Wooseok forced a smile out, although his parents couldn’t see it anyway. “But, can I… ask for something?”

_“Do you need something, honey? Does your uncle feed you well?”_ His mother began to sound restless on the other end.

“U-Umm.” Wooseok answered with a hum that clearly wasn’t a _yes._ “It’s… Could you keep this call a secret? P-Please don’t tell uncle about this.”

The silence that came after reflected his parents’ perplexity. _“Why, son?”_ His father asked.

Wooseok had a miserable look on his face that caused Jinhee to tug on her hair, frustrated that she couldn’t be of any help. Her father gave the boy a reassuring nod and motioned his hands telling him to calm down and proceed slowly.

“I…” Wooseok breathed out and bit his lower lip. “I don’t… want him to worry about me. R-Right now I’m… I’m not with him, but with a nice doctor… who’s taking good care of me.”

_“A doctor?? Are you still si—”_

“Mom, please don’t worry.” Wooseok cut before his mother could start crying on the phone. “I’m in good hands now. This doctor is my f-friend’s father. He and his family are helping me a lot, they treat me like I’m a part of them. I can’t tell you about this illness now… but I’m… I’m healing.” Wooseok tried his best to sound convincing, even though he wasn’t at all sure of his own words. “Can you promise not to tell uncle anything? I-I’ll come back to him when I get better.”

No matter how hard he tried to put it in a nice way, still he couldn’t prevent his mother from bursting into tears. The moment he heard her sniffles, that was when he began to cry along.

_“My son… My only son is sick now and I can’t take care of him. I can’t do anything for him,”_ the woman cried. _“Sometimes I think I’ve done a big mistake by giving away the responsibility of a parent because of the past hardship. Maybe if we had struggled harder, we could have lived together, no matter how hard it would have been! As long as my son could grow up well with our love… But we always thought it was best for you to get the best education and chase your dream. We didn’t want to see you go through hard times with us… Even when your uncle and aunt divorced, we didn’t come to take you home! Because we believed it when your uncle said he could still raise you well and we should take time to recover, but has he really raised you well? Why… Why is my son sick now if he really has..? Have we… Have we made a terrible mistake, my son?”_

Tears flowing uncontrollably, Wooseok covered his mouth to muffle any sounds threatening to pour out so his parents wouldn’t have to hear his pain. He couldn’t. It was too difficult to hide a wound so big that had long been rotten. He had just let his parents take a peek of it, but they were already so shattered; what would it be like if he exposed the whole thing?

Also in tears, Jinhee moved to his side and took him into a hug, trying her best to calm him down with gentle rubs up and down his back – the same way as how Wooseok’s father was comforting his mother, miles away in their hometown.

“It… It wasn’t completely your fault.” Wooseok’s hoarse voice cracked. “But if we could turn back time, I… I would never want to leave home.”

The mother’s cries were agonizing, filled with pure regret for that her son then had confirmed their biggest mistake as his parents – sending him away from the safety and comfort of his true home against his will. The boy too was tortured by his guilt, for finally sounding out his true feeling for once. But a part of him couldn’t be more relieved.

_“I’m so sorry, my baby, I’m so sorry…”_ The mother repeated over and over. _“We love you with all our hearts, do you know that? W-We will come and take you home, okay?”_

Jinhee pulled back slowly and gazed at Wooseok’s tear-stained, dumbfounded face with her glimmering round eyes. Instinctively his hand caught her wrist, preventing her from moving any further away as if he was afraid she would leave his side.

“M-Mom… I will come home, w-when the time is right.” His lips quivered. “Give me time to heal, a-and settle everything… I will come home when everything has been fixed.”

_“Don’t struggle alone, baby, please always remember that you have us who love you so much. We’ll always be waiting for our Wooseokie at home. Call us when you’re ready to come back, okay?”_

For the rest of the phone call, Wooseok didn’t let go of Jinhee’s wrist and his eyes remained glued on her sad puppy face. He probably wasn’t aware, but his grip was firm and possessive, causing Jinhee to think, it was so Wooshin-like. Always grabbing for her wirst and holding it like someone would snatch her from him any second. As the boy continued to talk to his parents about going back home, Jinhee couldn’t help but pout sadly and think of how much she was going to miss that grip. And that handsome face. And those beautiful doe eyes. And the random switching between his troublesome yet loveable alters. Especially Wooshin’s excessive confidence and annoying narcissism, his endless teasing and lame corny lines.

Just, his presence as a whole.

_What would Wooshin say about this?_ Jinhee wondered. Since Wooseok had been happy lately, Wooshin hadn’t come out in quite a long while – she wasn’t really sure if that was the reason why. It was just Woo who had come out twice to annoy Junho and play with their parents. _Woo._ Jinhee would surely miss that naughty big baby too.

Once the call had ended and the phone had been put away, the first thing Wooseok did was leaning in for a hug, yet the sudden awareness of the doctor’s presence snapped him out of it and stopped him midway. He turned to the older male like a deer caught in the headlights.

“Go ahead, go ahead.” The doctor chuckled, giving an eye smile that reminded Wooseok of Junho so much.

Doubtful and embarrassed, Wooseok enveloped the shy girl in an embrace that didn’t even last longer than two seconds. He couldn’t possibly squeeze her like he wanted to right in front of her father. Could he?

“Are you going to leave?” Jinhee mewled. She looked down and poked on the sheets like a sad little child. “What about school? Are you going to transfer to a new school before this year ends?”

“It–It’s not going to be _that_ soon.” Wooseok fidgeted, finding the situation quite awry – he hadn’t expected to talk about returning to his hometown. “I shouldn’t… leave so soon, should I? A-At least I should finish this school year before I move.”

Jinhee shook her gloomy thoughts off and forced out a smile. “Don’t let anything hold you back. This might be your only chance to be free, right? You won’t have to deal with your uncle anymore. It… It would be better if you can tell your parents about your condition, so you can get treatments in your hometown. They have the right to know, don’t they?”

_But I don’t want to get treatments in my hometown. I want it here, with Doctor Cha… With you. Is it possible to heal far away from you?_

Wooseok wanted to say all of it, yet on the contrary, he couldn’t bring himself to get even just a word out. On the other hand, he wasn’t that thick-skinned either; he was fully aware the longer he stayed with them, the more they had to spend on him. Just because they didn’t mind taking care of him, doesn’t mean he felt no guilt at all when they provided things for free. The last thing he wanted was being a leech to the nice family.

Wooseok’s thoughts were easily read by the doctor through his lost doe eyes.

“Wooseok, your happiness and mental peace should be the first priority right now. Even though I’ve been trying to help you, as a doctor, I can’t tell you when you will heal, or _if_ you will heal by staying here. Because I’m just a doctor, an ordinary human. I’m not God. Now, I think you’ve found what can bring you happiness, and what can ruin that happiness. Don’t rush, son. Take your time to think about this with a cool mind and a calm heart. But one thing to keep in mind… besides your parents, you also have this family here to turn to. It was our own decision to take you in, wasn’t it?”

The elder man gave a comforting pat on the boy’s arm and a warm smile. Seeing that those were not enough to reassure the boy, he came closer and gave him a firm fatherly hug that he had never received before – or at least had no memory of.

“You can even call me ‘father’, if you want.” The doctor’s chest vibrated against Wooseok’s cheek as he let out a deep, soothing chuckle.

Caught off guard by the warm display of affection, Wooseok crumbled once again and broke into tears.

_Father…_ He’d rather give that title to this kind-hearted man than to his own uncle.

“Cha Jinny, you won’t mind sharing your father with another child, right?” The father laughed, threading his fingers through Wooseok’s hair, patting his back as he rocked the boy back and forth to stop his crying.

“Not at all.” The teary-eyed daughter shook her head and giggled. “I’ve shared you with many children at the hospital anyway, it’s nothing new.”

Giving in to the older man’s comforting hug, Wooseok looked up timidly like a kitten to meet his loving gaze, and gave him a sweet eye smile in return.

“F-Father,” he called shyly.

“Wow, I feel like my wife has just given birth to our third child.” Doctor Cha laughed. “I could cry happy tears right now, really! I wanted three kids, but my wife never agreed. She said she’d rather let me adopt a naughty dog than be pregnant again!”

“Wait, I never knew that,” Jinhee complained, “I wanted another sibling too! A baby sister!”

“I know, right??” The father and daughter high-fived each other. “Let’s talk about this with your mom later.”

“Huh? Dad… I don’t think she can get pregnant again, though.” Jinhee chuckled.

“Dad knows, but there’s nothing wrong with giving it a _shot_ , right? If it doesn’t work, we can always adopt one cute baby girl.”

The eldest’s wink made the teenagers look away from each other and smile bashfully to themselves. The man still acted and talked like a young adult sometimes.

“But you kids, it’s not your time yet. Even though you already live under the same roof, there’s still a _loooong_ way to give it a _shot._ Pew, pew! If you need appropriate sex education, or some clean and healthy relationship tips, I will happily teach you both. You need parental guidance, don’t experiment on reproduction activities on your own, okay—?"

“D-Dad, stop! It’s embarrassing!”

* * *

Jinhee was close to running down the corridors. Break time was about to end, her empty stomach was growling like some ferocious wild animal – she hadn’t had the chance to eat because of getting stuck in the student council room earlier, being held captive for a cuddling session by a certain clingy senior boy.

Now, after having escaped his presence, she was rushing to the cafeteria to fill her poor belly.

When she marched down the stairs and made a turn around the corner, though, a naughty foot came into her track and tripped her, successfully putting her rapid steps to a halt. She let out a loud gasp and widened her eyes comically as she lost balance and stumbled forward – yet before her body could slam against the floor, an arm easily caught her and pushed her back to a straight standing position.

“The hell was that for?? You freaking tripped me!” Jinhee swung her hand across the culprit’s chest – the boy who not only had made her trip, but also had caught her, oddly. A villain and a hero in one.

A mischievous smile grew on the boy’s small, plump lips. Jinhee sighed and rolled her eyes, trying not to let that contagious smile have its effect on her.

“Now is not the right time, Kim Wooshin. I need to eat while I still can.” Jinhee walked past the taller teen and continued her way, not minding him as he caught up and then walked by her side.

“I can smell someone else’s scent on you,” Wooshin said.

“Wow, that’s an amazing ability. Have you switched into a dog? You should apply to be the police’s pet.” Jinhee whined feeling her stomach rumble once again. She couldn’t help but get a little snarky when she was starving.

Ignoring the girl’s sarcasm, Wooshin looked sideways at her and shoved his hands into his pockets. “You still owe me explanations. It feels like I extincted and came back to life in an alternate universe. That nerd really did a good job trying to get rid of me, huh? _Tch_. No way in hell.”

“Stop that. He likes you now,” Jinhee said.

“Too bad, it’s one-sided.” Wooshin looked away and murmured, “I like someone else.”

“That’s not even what I mean.” Jinhee proceeded to get herself a tray of food and picked a table of two that had just been left by a pair of junior girls. Wooshin followed along with his own food, allowing himself to sit together with the other. Jinhee didn’t wait a second longer to dig in and stuff her cheeks with food.

“Slow down.” Wooshin chuckled, watching the girl with high amusement.

“No, _you_ hurry up. The bell is going off soon,” Jinhee said with a full mouth. “Why didn’t you eat earlier anyway?”

“I was waiting for you.” Wooshin stuffed his mouth with food to mask his smile. “Aren’t you gonna thank me for that? If you’re late to class, you won’t be late alone.”

Jinhee cocked an eyebrow. “Fine. Thank you, Wooshin, that’s very kind of you. But please don’t get yourself in unnecessary troubles.”

“Doesn’t matter if we get in trouble together.” Wooshin bit the tip of his chopsticks and flashed a wink, catching the other off guard. Jinhee laughed bashfully and coughed a little after choking on her food.

“I see that my charm has started to work on you,” Wooshin said.

Jinhee rolled her eyes. “Shut up and eat.”

“Why don’t you try and _shut_ me up?” Puckering his lips, Wooshin pulled a seductive face and smooched the empty air. The girl across the table shuddered and cringed in disgust.

“Good gracious, I’m gonna puke.” She retorted.

Leaning to the side, Wooshin rested his arm on the table and supported his head up in his hand. He continued to feed himself and munch on his food, with his smiling sharp eyes trained on Jinhee, who then unusually became shy and fidgety under his gaze.

“Clumsy.” He grabbed a napkin and casually wiped the stain left on the other’s lips. Jinhee flinched and blinked in surprise.

“What?” Wooshin smirked and raised an eyebrow. “Hurry and finish your food. I’m done.”

Jinhee was even more taken aback finding Wooshin’s tray empty. “W-When did you—”

“The bell is going to ring in…” Wooshin looked at his watch, “…three minutes.”

Upon the notification, Jinhee shoved everything she could into her mouth quickly like a starving hamster. “ _Hwelp_ me _winish_ _dis_!”

Wooshin cackled and clapped his hands elatedly before helping the other finish her food. Jinhee was amazed by how much food could actually fit in his small mouth. Just a second after they had dropped their chopsticks in the empty tray, the bell screamed throughout the school building.

“Let’s go!” Wooshin put their trays away quickly, grabbed Jinhee’s wrist, and pulled her running back to their class. It wasn’t that he was afraid of getting in trouble for being late; he didn’t want _her_ to be in trouble.

Instead of panicking like she’d normally do, Jinhee found herself laughing in the situation. It was fun; just running together with Wooshin, through corridors and up the stairs, with his firm grip on her wrist.

“Why are you laughing?” Wooshin himself laughed hearing the other’s light, bubbly laughter. “Are you turning into a trouble maker? I won’t mind having a partner in crime.”

They passed by a particular classroom, where a familiar boy was about to close the door. Jinhee spotted him and greeted with a cheerful, “Hi, Yohan!” without even stopping or turning her head back to see him a second longer. She went on running with Wooshin and left the other boy flabbergasted.

Wooshin smirked in victory.

Luck was on their side; their teacher came just after they had tossed themselves into their seats. Cackling inaudibly, the chairmates shared a fist bump beneath their desks.

“Where have you guys been? We were getting worried,” Yeonwoo said.

“You guys look like you’ve just run a marathon,” Seungyoun added.

Jinhee and Wooshin turned their heads back and gave nothing but innocent grins to the couple.

Throughout the class, Wooshin became silent, seeming to be engrossed in taking notes in his notebook. Jinhee was starting to wonder if he had quietly switched into Wooseok.

The closer she paid attention, though, the more she noticed his hand movements, and then the colored pencils he used after; he was not writing, but drawing and coloring something. Jinhee leaned closer for a peek.

_Gosh. I should’ve seen this coming._

She rolled her eyes and smiled shyly. Ever since the class had begun, Wooshin had been busy drawing a graffiti on an empty page of his book. A light blue and orange _“ChaJinny”,_ with the side profile of a beautiful long-haired girl next to the letter ‘C’, facing left with her eye closed. There was a little yellow fish kissing her smiling lips. He made the long wavy hair extend and flow artistically around the letters, intertwining with green seaweeds, and curling around some pink, red, and purple corals. He had added some tiny starfish and seashells to decorate the hair, as well as some air bubbles and rays of light in the ocean blue background.

Jinhee had never pointed it out, but his artistic side never failed to amaze her.

“The theme is ‘under the sea’,” Wooshin said in a low voice, focusing on outlining the graffiti with a black marker, which made it more cartoon-like. The teacher was yapping endlessly but nothing passed through his ears. He looked sideways at his curious chairmate, a smug smile playing on his lips. “You like it?”

Jinhee answered with a genuine nod. “It’s pretty,” she whispered. “Why the sea theme?”

“It brings memory of when we were swimming together.” He completed his work with an extra touch of a tiny _‘kws’_ signature on the bottom right corner – something both he and Wooseok always did after finishing their pieces of art. After months of being friends with him, Jinhee could tell some differences between Wooseok’s arts and Wooshin’s – apart from the darker and bolder style Wooshin had compared to Wooseok’s softer one, both their signatures were in form of a small _‘kws’,_ but Wooseok’s was written in cursive letters and was always placed diagonally on the top left corner; while Wooshin’s had a bold graffiti-like font, always on the bottom right.

“Look, the key point is here. It’s small but important.” He pointed at the fish kissing the girl. “It has the brightest color to catch your attention.”

“Why is it the key point?” Jinhee asked innocently.

Wooshin’s answer was straightforward. “This girl is you, and this fish is me.”

Jinhee blushed. “W-We didn’t even kiss. You must be delusional.”

“We got a little _intimate_.” Wooshin winked. He ripped the paper out of his book neatly and placed it on Jinhee’s desk. “Here, for you.”

Jinhee gasped. “It should’ve stayed in your book!” She whispered loudly.

“Don’t you like it? Don’t make me regret ripping it out,” Wooshin said. “I’ll take it back if you don’t want it.”

“I-I want, I want. Sheesh.” Jinhee took the drawing and stored it carefully in her file folder, like it was a precious paper made of gold. She looked at her chairmate and decided to thank him with an adorable smile. “Thank you.”

Feeling his heart leap at the sight of her sweet dimples, Wooshin pressed his lips together into a thin line and looked away, awkwardly clearing his throat and fidgeting with his fingers on his desk.

When the teacher wasn’t looking, he stole the chance to give a pat on Jinhee’s head. It was so fast and sudden that she became dazed like a lost puppy.

The teacher didn’t see it, but of course people sitting behind them witnessed it – Jinhee turned to the couple sitting behind her and found them covering their face-splitting grins with their hands.

“Have you guys become official?” Seungyoun whispered.

“Soon,” Wooshin said nonchalantly. His answer made Jinhee’s eyes grow as big as saucers, while Seungyoun and Yeonwoo responded with an inaudible ecstatic scream and a silent excited applause.

Slowly Jinhee dropped her gaze down to her book and chose to pretend she hadn’t heard anything but her own heartbeat.

_Pull yourself together, Cha Jinhee. This is like the thousandth time you hear his lame flirty jokes! Why are you reacting like this?_ She scolded herself.

When the next break time came, something unfortunate happened.

“Wooshin? Wake up, it’s break time.” Jinhee poked her chairmate in the forehead. The boy didn’t budge. She tapped his cheek and shook his shoulder; didn’t work either.

“Sheesh, are you a dead log? Whoever is going to be your future wife is the unluckiest.” Her naughty side jumping out, she pinched Wooshin’s nose and shut his parted lips to block the air from getting in. It took eleven seconds, she counted, until the boy jolted up from his slumber gasping for air. His doe eyes were wide and his chest rose and fell violently as he flicked his wild gaze side to side, until it ultimately stopped on Jinhee.

The boy gawked at her, and she shuddered feeling her skin crawl catching a terribly bad feeling.

“…Noona. Woo had a nightmare!”

Jinhee nearly fainted.

“Woo?” Seungyoun and Yeonwoo said in unison, causing the boy to turn to them wearing an adorable confused face; round innocent eyes blinking and plump lips jutted out into a small pout.

“Oh, look at him, he’s so cute,” Seungyoun cooed, clutching on his chest. “So, this is the child alter? His voice even sounds like a baby!”

Ignoring him, Woo flew his gaze around the classroom. A frown gradually surfaced on his face. “Is this school? Woo doesn’t want to go to school. Woo wants to play!”

Without any warning, the boy got up from his seat and fled the classroom with all his child-like noises, leaving his classmates flabbergasted.

“…Catch him!” Jinhee snapped out of her trance and ran after the boy, followed by Seungyoun and Yeonwoo. The curious Hangyul also joined in.

“Dda! Dda!” Woo shot a mocking aegyo pose at the four running teenagers and giggled his way around the school building.

“What the hell is _dda_ _dda_?” Hangyul asked, “Did something snap in his head?”

“ _Aish_ , I shouldn’t have waken him up.” Jinhee winced at the sight of her chairmate running and bouncing around like a hyperactive giant ball. Even in his child mode, he was much faster than Seungyoun, who was well renowned as a top player in their soccer club. It _did_ make Seungyoun question that status a little bit.

As he turned around the corner, suddenly Woo crashed into a boy and fell onto his butt. Sitting on the floor, with his skinny legs apart like a baby, he raised his head until his eyes met with a pair of horrified ones.

“A-Are you alright? You fell so hard!” It was Yohan. He offered a hand to help the other boy up. Instead of taking it, though, Woo wrapped himself around Yohan’s leg like a giant koala.

Yohan got the shock of his life – his friendly rival was then clinging on him, sticking his pretty face to his muscular thigh. Was it Wooseok? No, he was way too shy for that bold action. Wooshin? No, his pride was too big to lower down on him that much. Yohan’s mind had crashed and stopped working.

“Hyung, some crazy hyungs and noonas are chasing Woo!” The smaller boy pointed at the group of four, who then stopped in front of them and bent over their knees, panting violently. Woo stood up and hid behind Yohan’s bigger body.

Still in shock, Yohan remained frozen with his dorky gawking bunny face.

“I’m so sorry, his other alter came out,” Jinhee explained in between her heavy breath.

Suddenly Yohan flinched and let out a high-pitched yelp that immediately turned into a dolphin laugh. He squirmed around and reached his hands back to stop what the other boy was doing.

“S-Stop touching me!”

Woo was roaming his hands around Yohan’s bottom, and then to the sides, slipping them into the pockets of his pants. A victorious smile bloomed on his face as his hand came in contact with something in the left pocket. He fished it out and lifted it in the air; it was Yohan’s phone.

“Hyung, play with Woo!”

All the color drained from Jinhee’s face upon recognizing the familiar scene. He was doing that _thing_ again, what he had done to Junho and his phone.

Before she could give a warning, Woo had turned on his heels and dashed away with the phone.

Therefore, she came into one conclusion; Woo was the child alter with a pickpocketing tendency. It was pretty much safe to say that this innocent-looking alter was, in a way, more _dangerous_ than Wooshin.

The group of chasers then became five, with Yohan as the new addition.

Yohan was running faster than the others. It looked as if he had a top secret on his phone and his life was going to end the moment it got spilled. With invisible flames in his eyes, he put all his power in his feet and pounced forward – the other students around them stopped and looked up in awe as he flew so high in the corridor, a graceful slow motion, and landed meters away, in the spot-on timing to catch Woo’s waist in his arms. The smaller boy broke into ecstatic laughter and wriggled in a helpless attempt to break free.

Yohan’s firm arms squeezed the delicate figure and pressed him against his own body until he stopped moving around. Even though was quite pissed, the other’s contagious laugh managed to make him giggle along.

Refusing to give in, Woo plunged the phone into his shirt through the collar and let it slide down to his waistband, where his shirt was tucked in. Once again the kid let out a victorious laugh.

Yohan couldn’t help but chuckle. He rested his hands on his hips and sighed. “I won’t hesitate taking that shirt off, you know. Are you going to give it back nicely or should I get it myself?”

“Get it.” Woo stuck his tongue out mockingly. Yohan raised an eyebrow, his lips curving into an amused smirk.

“Okay.” the taller boy shrugged.

“Wait, we gotta hold him.” Hangyul came forward and held Woo’s arm as if the kid was a dangerous criminal. Seungyoun decided to join in and hold the other arm, just in case.

Curious eyes fell on them as Yohan squatted down and unbuttoned just the button above Woo’s waistband, where his phone was, and slipped his hand in.

Out of the blue, Woo lost his balance and swayed back and forth on his feet. Luckily he had two big boys holding him so he didn’t fall. He blinked a few times to clear his blurry sight and shook his head.

“…What are you doing?”

Yohan’s hand stopped midway, half of his phone still in the other’s shirt. He looked up and found a pair of dark, half-lidded eyes staring him down. Yohan could recognize him at this point. He took his phone back quickly, stood up straight and cleared his throat.

“Taking back my belonging that you stole,” Yohan answered.

Wooshin shook his arms off Hangyul and Seungyoun’s hands, and fixed his unbuttoned shirt.

“Sorry about it.” He cleared his throat as well, clearly hesitant and insincere with the apology. He shifted his eyes to the dazed girl behind Yohan. “But next time, don’t get your hands past my clothes. Only one person can do it.”

With that said, he walked past the taller boy, grabbed Jinhee’s wrist, and left the scene like nothing had happened.

“What the hell?” Jinhee asked, “What was that supposed to mean? You’re going to make people think of bad things about us!”

“Won’t you be jealous if someone sticks their hand into my shirt?” Wooshin asked nonchalantly.

“…I can’t believe you.” Jinhee huffed. “I should’ve known. It’s pointless to talk some sense into your head.”

Chuckling, Wooshin messed the shorter’s hair and pinched her cheek playfully. His cold demeanor easily melted just like that when others were no longer around. Jinhee, however, didn’t think it was nice of him to be rude instead of offering a sincere apology after causing trouble and creating a scene. She swatted his hand away and glared at him. The mischievous boy pretended to be terrified of her in a mocking way, pulling a hilarious scared face while covering his head with his arms.

The two teenagers then passed by the student council room right when the president walked out the door. Oddly, Wooshin took a sudden step back and averted his head away.

“Oh, Jinny!” Seungwoo chirped, beaming at his beloved little ‘sister’. His big brother instinct took over as he caught the girl into a bone-cracking hug.

“Oh my God.” Jinhee wheezed. “Seungwoo oppa. We’ve done this earlier, remember? Are you going to turn me into a soft bone soup and eat me for dinner?”

Seungwoo hollered in high-pitched laughter that boomed throughout the whole floor. Wooshin flinched and took another step away.

“I’m going to eat you as a dessert.” Seungwoo rubbed his cheek on top of Jinhee’s head and cuddled the life out of her.

But then, his smile faltered a little as he finally noticed Wooshin’s presence. “Ah, you’re with him again. Of course.” He released Jinhee and let her breathe, at last.

There was something in the senior’s unreadable gaze and Joker-like smile that Wooshin loathed so much. He couldn’t bring himself to even glance at his face.

“What do you mean, oppa?” Jinhee asked. She could sense the building tension between the two males.

“Oh, it’s just that I’ve seen you spend so much time with him lately. I’ve even heard of some rumors about you two. They’re just rumors, though, right?” Seungwoo shot an eye smile at Jinhee. “Does he treat you well?”

Jinhee nodded, bewildered. “Do you know each other?”

“Oh, we do.” The eldest chuckled. And yet, the way Wooshin kept him out of his field of sight made it clear to Jinhee that they weren’t at all on good terms.

“Kim Wooseok.” The name rolled out slow and cold despite the smile gracing the senior’s lips. “Have you learned your lesson well?”

Wooshin remained silent. Jinhee started to find the tense atmosphere and her lack of understanding quite irking.

“Why are you both acting like this?” She frowned. “Seungwoo oppa, tell me what happened between you two.”

The student council president took a glance at his silver wristwatch and sighed. “There won’t be enough time. Let’s meet after school, shall we? You can find me in the gymnasium.”

Wooshin was _scared_. He couldn’t hide it well this time, but still, Jinhee wasn’t aware of the situation. She had no idea what was going on behind his silence; the bad memories that were rushing back into his head like a flash flood. She wanted to know the truth and Wooshin knew he had no right to prevent that from happening – to prevent her from discovering his deepest regret that had been buried for years.

_This will be the last day I can be close to her._

“Wooshin, what’s wrong?”

Jinhee had asked the same questions five times, she counted, until the last class was dismissed. She always got a nervous smile and nothing more as the answer each time.

But this time, after the fifth time she asked, Wooshin held her wrist to stop her from leaving her seat. He waited until all of their classmates had left the room.

“Are you guys okay?” Seungyoun asked, making an ‘OK’ sign with his fingers. There were only him and Yeonwoo who hadn’t left besides the two, while Hangyul had left for a practice session with Yohan. “You sure you don’t need us?”

Jinhee nodded and smiled. “We’re good. Go ahead, guys. We’re just going to talk to Seungwoo oppa for a bit, and then go straight home.”

“Tell me if he does something stupid,” Yeonwoo said, “I’ll scold him when he gets home. Somehow I don’t feel so good about this.”

Jinhee chuckled. “Don’t worry, I know how to deal with him.”

After the couple had left them alone and shut the door, giving them the privacy they needed, Wooshin got up from his seat and pulled Jinhee along. He was at a loss of words – it was so unlike him.

“It looks like I’m not going to like what I’m about to hear from him. Is that why you’re nervous?” Jinhee started, asking with a soft, cautious tone.

Wooshin nodded.

“Do you… want to tell me first then?” Jinhee cocked her head, peering at the other’s cold look. “I’ll see it from your point of view too.”

At last, Wooshin had enough courage to raise his chin and look straight into the other’s eyes, although his tongue was still fighting against his will to talk. “C-Can I… hug you?”

_Wooseok?_ Jinhee thought the other might have switched because of how anxious he was. But his fearful gaze convinced her that it was in fact still Wooshin, and he was actually _scared_ , not just nervous about asking for a hug.

“S-Sure.” Jinhee shrugged.

She hadn’t expected it to be the gentlest one she could receive from him, as if he was afraid of breaking her, or as if he was afraid he wouldn’t get that chance again. He pulled her close and engulfed her in his arms, placed his hand on the back of her head, gently making her lean on his shoulder. Breathing out a quavery sigh, he let his eyes flutter closed as he tilted his head and nuzzled the other’s cheek with his nose – just so he could hold back from involving his lips.

Jinhee could barely breathe. As a ticklish person, she was struggling hard not to push the boy’s face away and squeal and slap herself out of it. The warm breath blowing against the delicate skin of her neck got her to involuntarily squeeze the back of Wooshin’s blazer in her fists and bury her face flat onto his shoulder. She was unknowingly giving the boy a hard time to keep himself under control.

Wooshin bit his bottom lip hard to snap himself back to his common sense.

“It was… It was an accident,” he began, “I didn’t mean it. It was supposed to be someone else. I hurt the wrong person. I messed up. I’m… I’m sorry.”

Bad scenarios ran through Jinhee’s mind. “You didn’t… kill anyone… did you?” She squeaked.

Wooshin shook his head feverishly and held Jinhee closer. “No! Never. I’m not—I’m not that kind of person. Believe me.”

It was enough to draw out a relieved sigh from Jinhee.

“That person is fine now,” Wooshin continued, “but they’d hate me for what I did.”

“If it was an accident, then why would they hate you?” Jinhee pulled away, sending a great sense of loss that washed over the other. She looked into his eyes in utter confusion. “There are no reasons to hate you if that person is perfectly fine now. Aren’t you beating yourself up too hard about it? Come, Seungwoo oppa must be waiting.”

Jinhee grabbed Wooshin’s backpack and handed it over to the owner. It was then her turn to hold the other’s wrist and lead the way. Wooshin had heard her loud and clear, yet his doubt hadn’t receded one bit; would it still be okay after she heard the story from the other side?

The gymnasium was empty. Some of the lights were off, leaving only the middle part illuminated. Intimidating loud sounds of a basketball aggressively slamming against the floor echoed throughout the huge room; not much of a warm welcome compared to the smile they got from the person who had been waiting for them alone. He shot the ball from the middle of the court, sending it flying gracefully through the hoop – a perfect three-point shot.

“Oh, you’re finally here. I was wondering if you had forgotten to come.” Seungwoo fetched the ball, held it on his hip, and motioned his hand for his juniors to come. They sat down in the middle of the indoor court; Jinhee and Wooshin side by side, and Seungwoo facing them, leaning back with an arm supporting his weight. His other hand rolled the ball back and forth over the glossy floor, its continuous movements somehow pushing the other boy to the edge; he fidgeted and squirmed in discomfort, feeling like kicking the ball away.

“So, Jinny wanted to know something… right?” Seungwoo asked with a smile. “What do you want to know?”

Jinhee chose to go forthright. “How did you know each other? What did he do? What did you do?”

Seungwoo chuckled. “Are you in a hurry? Fine, I’ll try to be quick and answer them. So… How did we know each other?” He turned to the younger boy, who had his head down low as if he was about to be punished. “Well, we met in middle school. He went to that one school near ours. The one that was always competing against our school, remember? His school would hold competitions and invite us, and vice versa.”

“Oh, I remember!” Jinhee perked up and turned to Wooshin. “You went to that school? I had no idea! I visited your school several times and had some friends there. Whoa, we could’ve met!”

“You _did_ meet, though.” Seungwoo’s smile became a mysterious, bitter one, as he watched the changes of Jinhee’s pure expressions.

“We did _?_ ” Jinhee gawked. Wooshin had no bits of courage to lift his head or even make any sounds; his guilt was eating him up inside.

“Actually, I had seen him once before that day. But that day was what made us know each other.” Seungwoo averted his gaze away from Wooshin. “I witnessed him do something that could’ve killed someone important to me. Someone who is also important to _him_ now, I believe.”

A bead of tear fell and splashed onto the back of Wooshin’s quivering hand.

“Who… Who is it?” Jinhee asked. The first person that came into her mind was Yeonwoo, Seungwoo’s little sister and their beloved friend.

But the next thing that came out of Seungwoo’s mouth wiped all the color off her face.

“Oh, Jinny... Do you remember those months you had to spend in a wheelchair?”


	13. Chapter 13

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a double update, make sure to read the previous chapter first so you won't get confused :) Happy reading!
> 
> !TRIGGER WARNING!: description of bullying and physical abuse

* * *

_Four years ago…_

“Two-faced little crap! Take your mask off and fight us!”

Thirteen-year-old Wooseok was thrown into a bush with a single hard blow to his jaw. He grimaced in pain as he felt sharp twigs scrape his skin, not deep enough to leave open wounds, but the lines left on his scrawny arms eventually turned bright red. Three bigger boys towered over him, kicking and stepping on his small body every time he tried to get back up.

“Playing weak? Did you forget what you did yesterday?!” One of the boys pointed at the dark bruise on his own cheekbone.

“I-I’m sorry…” Little Wooseok began to cry. “I’m sorry.”

“Your ‘sorry’ won’t erase this bruise and get me out of trouble!!”

Wooseok cried louder in pain as the boys wreaked their anger upon him, blow by blow, kick by kick, until his senses became numb and what he could feel was only the dull pain in his chest, feeling full and suffocated there. They stopped only when they no longer had the energy to beat him up any further. He was left alone and unable to move.

“Why…” The petite boy sobbed. “Why, Wooshin?”

Out of nowhere, a pair of soft hands grabbed his arms and pulled him out of the bush. A pretty face of a girl came into his blurry field of sight.

“Are you okay??”

Young Wooseok was quick to get lost in the unfamiliar teary brown eyes that were blinking behind a big pair of round glasses. She was definitely a nerd, just like Wooseok himself. Apart from those glasses, her uniform was perfectly neat, and her hair was also neatly braided into low pigtails that rested on her narrow shoulders. She had rosy baby cheeks and plump lips that reminded Wooseok of cute little chicks.

“I-I’m so sorry I didn’t stop them! I was scared, I-I... I’m bullied too. What’s… your name?”

Wooseok blinked and gulped. His tears had completely stopped. “K-Kim… Kim Wooseok.”

“Kim Wooseok? I’m Son Doyeon. Let’s go, you’re bleeding!”

That was how Wooseok met his first love.

They were both freshmen, just in different classes. Since that day, though, they spent time together whenever they could; having lunch together, studying together, hiding in the library together, getting bullied together. The first time Wooseok told Doyeon about Wooshin, she immediately announced, “I’ll study hard to be a psychiatrist, so I can help you heal!”

Wooseok was young and clueless about love, but he knew for sure that this girl was his soulmate, whom he couldn’t afford to lose. That was not the case for Wooshin, though. The girl might be Wooseok’s first love, but after getting to know her too, his alter would rather consider her as his one and only friend whom he had to protect. Perhaps it just wasn’t Wooshin’s time yet to experience such romantic feeling for the first time.

And that day came. A neighboring school was holding a Sports Week event, something they always did to build relations with other schools and their students, calling it a _friendly competition._ The funny thing was, their own school did the exact same thing, and an invitation would always be sent by the one that lost the previous competition. The students of both schools were completely aware of the childishness going on. From the word getting around, it was said that the principals of those two schools were relatives.

Nonetheless, over time, the kids had come to enjoy making friends with and visiting each other.

“It’s the final today! I hope our school wins the most categories!” Doyeon was walking around the neighboring school excitedly, moving from one competition field to another, slipping through the sea of students in various uniforms from different schools.

Being small and shy, eventually Wooseok just had to lose his bubbly friend in the crowd. His anxiety kicked in.

“D-Doyeon? Son Doyeon, w-where are you?”

Everything in his sight began to spin. He clutched his temple as his feet brought him wandering around aimlessly, trying to find any quieter spots, because the noises of the crowd made his head pound like crazy.

Unsurprisingly, there were no quiet spots nearby.

“Stop! Let go of me!”

Wooseok froze in his track as soon as his ears caught the familiar voice. He flicked his head around to find the source of the voice.

And he found her. Getting bullied again, even by students from a different school – two girls wearing the hosting school’s uniforms.

“Why did you show up here and call me unnie? Didn’t you think of my image? You want people to know that I have a loser as my cousin?! Go back to your school and never step a foot here!”

The seemingly older girl, who was supposedly Doyeon’s cousin, yanked the younger girl’s hair back and forth before tossing her down to the ground. As if she hadn’t had enough, the older cousin sent a hard slap across Doyeon’s face when she got up, causing her glasses to fall and crack against the concrete.

Wooseok lost himself. As the girls walked away from Doyeon, his fists clenched hard on his sides, his dark eyes boring holes into their backs – Wooshin, his _evil_ alter, he’d say, had come to take revenge.

The thirteen-year-old boy forced himself and his throbbing head to stay alert and tail the two girls, dragging his feet like a starving zombie, pushing people out of his way. He painted the image of the cousin’s back in his head, because that was the only view he could see – not her face, not the other girl next to her.

_Black blazer. Long wavy black hair._

He followed the girls around, up the long stairs, and through packed corridors. When he turned around the corner, though, he crashed into a big boy and wobbled a few steps back.

“Hey, watch your way!”

Young Wooshin ignored the pissed boy and looked around to find Doyeon’s cousin.

_There she is, that witch._ Black blazer, long wavy black hair.

He continued to walk behind the girl, completely missing the fact that this girl was walking together with an entirely different girl, who looked nothing like the friend of Doyeon’s cousin.

“Sheesh, I hate Sports Week. It’s like our school turns into a shelter for natural disaster victims from all over the country.”

Wooshin’s next mistake was failing to notice the girl’s different voice – this one was softer and velvety, unlike the cousin’s loud, high-pitched one.

“Oh, at least there are snack vendors here during the week! I’ll buy you something for free today, since you bought me bubble tea yesterday,” the other girl said.

“No need, Yeonwoo, you can keep your pocket money.”

“And you’re not my mother, Jinny, stop spending money on me. Come, let’s get back to class so I can grab my wallet.”

_Jinny. So that’s the witch’s name._ Wooshin took a mental note.

He hid behind the wall and watched as the girls entered a classroom. His evil instinct took over, urging him to move fast and find something to attack them with. His frantic eyes then fell on a janitor room, and then moved to the long, high staircases that led to the floors below and above.

_They’re going to go back down for the snacks._

Quickly Wooshin entered the small janitor room and filled an empty bucket he found there with water. As if the devil was giving him a hand, he spotted a big plastic container full of liquid hand soap in the corner. He snatched that container instead and left the bucket, ran all the way to the floor above, and stood by the railing, his eyes set on the stairs below. He opened the lid of the container and tossed it away.

“Hurry, Yeonwoo! I’m hungry.” The girl’s voice could be heard from below. Wooshin tightened his grip on the container and held it in a slightly tilted position.

As soon as the girls went down and came into his sight, Wooshin poured all the liquid soap down onto the stairs all at once until there was nothing left in the container.

“Jinny, watch out!!”

Yeonwoo was quick to stop her feet from taking another step as soon as she caught a glimpse of the falling pink liquid, but her hands weren’t fast enough to catch her friend, who was just two steps ahead of her. A high-pitched shriek broke in the air as Jinhee slipped and fell down the high stairs, until she landed on her back, laid in a pool of pink hand soap, with her legs contorted and her eyes closed.

“CHA JINHEEEEE!” Yeonwoo’s horrified scream echoed throughout the school building.

“What the hell have you done?!”

Ever so calmly, with a satisfied smile Wooshin turned around to see a fuming mad, taller teenage boy who had witnessed his crime, yet hadn’t been fast enough to stop him. On his nametag was printed his name, _Han Seungwoo._

“What have you done to my sister?!” He yanked Wooshin by the collar and screamed in his stoic face. The tall boy began to shower him with punches and kicks, on his face and all over his body, blinded by his rage. Everything was blurry in Wooshin’s sight, but he could still see it; there were tears running down the big boy’s face.

Crying, he tossed Wooshin to the floor and ran to the stairs on the other side of the corridor. It didn’t take long until he showed up on the floor below and took the unconscious girl away from the scene.

_She deserves it._ _That’s what she gets for hurting Doyeonie._

Wooshin got back up on his feet and wiped the blood off his lips with the back of his hand. As if nothing had happened, he left the building and went around the competition fields outside to look for his dear friend.

He found her sitting alone with a cup of bubble tea in her hands. She seemed contented with the drink, despite not being able to see anything in a distance more than three meters away.

“Doyeonie, there you are.” Wooshin sat next to her and offered an innocent smile.

The young girl stopped sucking on the black tapioca balls and gawked at the boy’s face.

“Your lips! Did you get bullied again??” She asked. “I got bullied too earlier! Ah… I ran into Nayoung unnie and her friend. They were embarrassed of me, so Nayoung unnie beat me up and told me to go back to our school. But I think she can’t do that. She doesn’t even own this school.”

Wooshin’s face turned pale. “N-Nayoung unnie…? W-Who is that?”

“Huh? She’s my older cousin. She’s a sophomore in this school.”

That was when the realization hit him; he had taken revenge on the _wrong_ person.

_Cha Jinhee._

From that moment on, the voice screaming that name was permanently stuck in the deepest of his memory.

* * *

Jinhee was in tears.

“Because of what you did, Jinny’s legs were broken, and she had to give up dancing. She had just joined our school’s dance club after a tough audition back then, and she was so happy about it. Can you imagine how disappointed she was after that incident?” Seungwoo asked, his tone calm yet his words sharp as a blade. “And, you know, that’s where her fear of heights came from. What are you going to say about it?”

“I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry.”

Wooshin was then kneeling in front of the girl, his forehead sticking on the floor, crying into his palms.

It would be a big fat lie to say that Jinhee wasn’t hurt to find out that this boy was the reason behind the saddest moments in her life. The boy whom she had _feelings_ for.

“…The first time you sat next to me, you even had the nerve to say that I wouldn’t get hurt… if I had a guy like you around me.” Her voice quavered as she recalled Wooshin’s rude scoffing towards Seungyoun on their first day.

“It was… It was meant as a promise.” Wooshin’s breath was caught in his throat. “I don’t want to hurt you, please believe me… I’m so sorry.”

Jinhee’s face contorted as she tried to comprehend what she was actually feeling. She _wanted_ to be angry about it, yet something kept stirring in her heart, reminding her of her own words.

_“There are no reasons to hate you if that person is perfectly fine now.”_

It was true, she was perfectly fine. Her legs were functioning well. Yes, she had been upset about not being able to be a dancer back then, but she could dance all she wanted now. She could even jump off the gate at Wooshin’s uncle’s house and dance around right after. She didn’t study performing arts like she had wanted to as a young teen, but she had found a new passion in drawing while she had been in the process of healing. It was what had led her to where she was then, studying the same field as her best friend Yeonwoo, and even being chairmates and friends with the boy who had hurt her. She had discovered what a complex, intriguing, irking yet endearing person he actually was, and she knew now that he had never meant it all – she truly believed he had no ill intentions because at this point, she knew him well enough to say that he was much more than the shallow jerk who had pissed her off so much in their first month. Jinhee had come to realize, her saddest moments had led to these _perfect_ moments in her life.

“Please don’t do this... Wooshin.” Jinhee held the boy’s wrists gently and pulled him off the floor, enveloping him in a warm embrace. Taken aback by the gentle response, Wooshin’s shoulders trembled as he sobbed like a little child, pressing his fists onto his eyes in a helpless attempt to stop his own tears. All he could see behind his closed eyelids then was the image of the younger Jinhee, laid unconscious with her broken legs. He felt disgusted by his own stoic reaction – his younger self had even smiled, that small, psychopath-like smile that had showed absolutely no regrets even after Seungwoo had beaten him up.

“I’m sorry… I’m really sorry,” he wailed.

Jinhee couldn’t even stop her own tears. She ran her fingers through the boy’s hair and began to rock him back and forth. “Stop crying. I said stop crying. I’m not going to forgive you if you don’t stop.”

Seungwoo looked away and wiped his eyes hastily. “…It won’t be fair if the story stops there,” he muttered. “It wasn’t an easy decision to tell you about this. If I expose him, I have to expose myself too.”

“What do you mean now?” Jinhee asked, looking exhausted. She wouldn’t let go of the boy weeping in her arms.

Seungwoo rubbed his whole face and exhaled a big sigh into his palms, suddenly nervous and conflicted.

“I… After that accident, he always came to our school. But… my friends and I… we started to bully him.”

* * *

Little Wooshin came home feeling like his head was going to burst. There were trails of tears left on his small, petrified face, and his fear was consuming him, filling his head with the worst scenarios he could think of.

_What if that girl died? What have I done?_

He stumbled into his room and searched for a paper and a pen, knocking things over in his panic state. He clutched on his temple and grimaced as he scribbled down a messy note with his trembling hand.

_2016.04.16. Cha Jinhee. Gyuwon Middle School. Fell on stairs. Liquid soap. Wrong person. Not Doyeon’s cousin. Cousin is a bully. Apologize._

He left the note on his desk and wobbled to his bed. But before he could reach it, he gave up on his consciousness and let his small body collapse to the floor.

Wooshin regained his consciousness only when his skinny arm was yanked by a powerful hand that effortlessly lifted him off the floor.

“WHAT DID YOU DO THIS TIME, YOU LITTLE BRAT?!” His uncle screamed in his pale face. “I’ve spent my money to send you to school, but what do you give me in return?? A phone call from your school telling me you broke a girl’s legs?! AT ANOTHER SCHOOL?!”

Wooshin burst into tears as his uncle tossed him onto his bed. There was a whip ready in his hand.

“Take those pants off and bend over!!”

That night, his screams and cries were louder than usual. He wanted to fight the man and stop him, so, _so_ bad, but he knew he deserved all the harsh punishment he could get.

He was left alone with burning, stinging red skin that was painted by fresh bleeding streaks. Biting onto his lip to hold the pain, while clutching on his fox plushie, the young boy spent the lonely night cleaning and treating his own wounds.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry.” He mewled the same words over and over again between his pained cries.

He couldn’t stop worrying about the girl. When Monday came, he decided to spill everything to Doyeon.

“Y-You shouldn’t have done that!” The young girl was upset. “Even if it was actually my cousin, and even though I wouldn’t mind her getting a lesson for once, you’d still get in a big trouble! You’re lucky that your uncle talked to the school and they changed the suspension into another punishment. W-What are you going to do now?”

“I’m… I’m going to apologize to her,” Wooshin said, “I’ll go there after school.”

“Is she even there? If her legs are broken, wouldn’t she stay at the hospital for at least several days?” Doyeon asked.

“I’ll still go and make sure. Maybe I’ll find out when she’ll come back to school.”

“Do you want me to go with you?”

“No, just go home and keep this a secret.”

And so, that afternoon, Wooshin stood outside the gate of the girl’s school, hoping for a miracle to happen so she would show up. He couldn’t exactly remember her face, but he thought, he’d easily recognize her with her broken legs. He had brought his note with him, in case he’d switch into Wooseok, so he’d still know what had happened and what he had to do there.

Wooshin had waited for an hour when he spotted three older boys walking towards his direction. He immediately recognized the tallest one in the middle. Han Seungwoo, the fourteen-year-old boy who had beaten him up. Wooshin remembered him addressing the girl as his sister.

_But they have different surnames,_ Wooshin thought. _Maybe cousins?_

“What are you doing here??” Seungwoo sent Wooshin a few steps back with a hard push on his chest. “Who else are you going to hurt now?!”

Wooshin bowed his head and averted his gaze away. “I’m here to apologize to Cha Jinhee.”

“She’s not here.” Seungwoo shot a cold glare. “She has to stay at the hospital because of _you_.”

_Doyeon was right,_ Wooshin thought. He mustered up his courage to ask, “When is she coming back?”

“Why should I tell you? So you can do another psychopathic thing to her?” Seungwoo looked away and muttered to his friends, “This kid needs a lesson.”

Apparently it was some type of secret code among them, because suddenly the other two boys grabbed Wooshin by his arms and brought him towards the school building. It was all too familiar to him; he didn’t have to question what was about to happen.

He was brought to the back of the building, an area where no one would see them. Seungwoo stood and watched in silence as his friends beat the small boy up into a pulp. He thought it would satisfy him and his anger. And yet, even the sight of Wooshin’s dirty, blood-stained face, and his weak body laid boneless on the ground, couldn’t reduce his anger one bit.

“Never come again, or this will happen more than you’d like.” Seungwoo warned before leaving the boy alone.

They thought that it would be the last time they saw him. He’d be gone for good. But no, he came again right the day after.

“Has Cha Jinhee come back?”

“Do you want to die?!”

He went home with new bruises from the boys, and came back to that school the following day with more wounds from his uncle, who believed he had gotten into a fight.

The third time he came, Wooseok came out just after the boys had left him alone behind the school building.

“W-Where am I?” He peeled his sore body off the ground and wobbled on his shaky legs.

Hurting and disoriented, Wooseok let his feet bring him wherever they pleased. He went into the school building, found the toilet, and proceeded to clean himself from the dirt and blood.

“Wooshin… What did you do this time? Don’t you know it’s exhausting to live like this?” He dried his face, wiped his teary eyes, and put his glasses back on. There was a small crack on the right glass. At this point, he believed his alter just wanted him dead.

Something caught his eyes. It was a crumpled paper sticking out the pocket of his blue blazer. He pulled it out and screwed up his eyes, trying to discern what letters were scribbled there. It was definitely a familiar handwriting, one that was quite similar yet not the same as his own, but this one was uglier than anything he had ever written.

_2016.04.16. Cha Jinhee. Gyuwon Middle School. Fell on stairs. Liquid soap. Wrong person. Not Doyeon’s cousin. Cousin is a bully. Apologize._

It didn’t take long for Wooseok to understand what it meant. “It was on Saturday… What day is it today?” He held his head as he came to a realization. “Th-That’s why this place is familiar… I went here with Doyeonie during Sports Week. It… It happened on the final day? Apologize… I have to find this person and apologize. B-But... I don’t know what she looks like. Should I… go home and wait until Wooshin comes out? H-He can come back tomorrow.”

Wooseok left the building hurriedly, fast-walking with his shoulders hunched forward and his head down low, feeling like a burglar sneaking into a stranger’s house. He was the only one wearing a blue uniform among students in black everywhere.

“Cha Jinhee!”

Wooseok’s feet came to an abrupt halt and his head snapped towards the gate, where a girl had shouted the name in his note. His doe eyes shifted to another girl who was coming her way from the outside, wearing a light blue dress instead of a uniform, and white casts covering both of her legs. She came in a wheelchair that was being pushed by a young boy in an elementary school uniform, most likely her little brother.

“Han Yeonwoo! I missed you!” The girl laughed as her brother pushed her wheelchair side to side in a zig-zag pattern until they stopped in front of the other girl, Han Yeonwoo, who immediately threw her arms around her.

“I missed you more! Gosh, I could barely survive in class without you! Why didn’t you tell me you were leaving hospital today?? You should be resting at home instead of coming here!”

“I couldn’t wait to see you.” Dimples curved on Jinhee’s cheeks as she flashed a bright grin at her friend.

Wooseok might have been near-sighted, but from the distance that actually wasn’t too far away, he could see that the girl’s eyes were swollen despite the big smile. She had obviously been crying.

“Ah, Jinny… Let’s just be happy, okay? I’m glad I can still see you today.”

Wooseok had no confidence to begin with. He averted his gaze from the girl, and off he ran away with his raging guilt.

_Cha Jinhee._ Wooseok found himself unable to focus on studying that night. _That other girl also called her Jinny. Sounds similar, but not exactly the same… Is it her nickname? Does Wooshin know?_

He shook his thoughts off.

_I should at least let Wooshin know that I’ve seen her._

Wooseok closed his Maths book and pushed it aside, replacing it with a piece of blank paper. He grabbed his pencil and began to sketch, transferring the image of the pretty smiling face stored in his memory onto the paper. He drew her smiling in her wheelchair, the little boy laughing behind her, and the other girl waving at them. Then he wrote _“Cha Jinhee/Jinny”_ under the wheelchair, and _“Han Yeonwoo”_ above the friend’s head. The drawing perfectly depicted the exact scene that he had witnessed.

Wooseok completed his work by adding a note below, _“I haven’t apologized”,_ and a small, cursive _‘kws’_ signature on the top left corner.

The drawing was discovered by Wooshin the next morning. His reaction was close to that of finding a hidden treasure chest.

“She has come back.”

Wooshin came to Jinhee’s school again that day with a new determination, bringing the drawing along with him so he could also find her friend, Han Yeonwoo.

“Hey! Do you really want to die??”

He didn’t run into Seungwoo this time, but his two friends were there to block his way.

“Seungwoo told us not to let you see Cha Jinhee. Now turn around and leave before we kick your ass,” one of them said.

Little Wooshin rolled his eyes. “What are you, his guard dogs?”

He regretted it right away. The boys went berserk on him and spared him no mercy.

“I need to find another way,” he thought out loud that night. “If I can’t see her in person, I need to find a way to send my apology to her.”

He wrote a new note. _“Send apology through someone.”_

Wooseok found the note the next day. “Through who?” He asked himself.

Nonetheless, he wrote a short letter for Jinhee and brought it to her school, not even sure if he could give it to anyone.

_“Dear Cha Jinhee,_

_I’m sorry for what I did. Please get well soon.”_

Wooseok felt like he was about to give a love letter to a girl. On the way to Jinhee’s school, as he passed by a small park, he spotted some wild white flowers.

_Pretty,_ he thought. They were small, bright, and pretty, just like the girl in the wheelchair. He plucked some of them, bound them logether with a long, thin leaf, and slipped the stems into his folded letter.

“I hope she likes these flowers.” He smiled.

As if he had been awaited, when he arrived, Seungwoo and his friends were already on standby at the gate.

It was the first time Wooseok encountered them while Wooshin was gone. But he was quick to read the situation when the boys stopped him in his track with irritated faces.

_Han Seungwoo._ Wooseok read the nametag of the boy staring him down. _Could he be related to Han Yeonwoo? Her brother? If that’s the case… he must be very angry at me._

“How many times do I have to tell you not to come back?” Seungwoo said through his clenched teeth. “Are you giving yourself a lesson? Should I beat you up until Jinny can walk again?”

He was very angry indeed.

“I j-just… Can I give this… to her?” Wooseok showed the letter in his hand.

Seungwoo took it and read the short message inside.

“Take care of him,” he said to his friends before turning around and walking away with the letter between his fingers.

“W-Wait, please!” Wooseok wriggled and kicked against the ground as the other two boys dragged him away for their _ritual._ “Please give it to her! Please!”

The letter and the flowers were thrown into the trash.

Wooseok thought he couldn’t take it anymore.

“I didn’t do it!! It wasn’t me!! Why do I have to clean your mess up?!” He screamed at the top of his lungs when the older boys had left him with new bruises. “I hate you, Wooshin!!”

The young boy hyperventilated between his sobs. Everything turned blurry in his sight. And suddenly he passed out.

“…Hey.”

Wooseok’s cheek was tapped gently by a hand.

“Hey, are you dead?”

The taps became harder and faster. Wooseok’s eyebrows creased and his head shook side to side as his doe eyes fluttered open, blinking slowly, taking time to discern the unfamiliar face of a boy who was looking at him in concern.

“Whoa, thank goodness. I thought you were possessed! You were screaming alone like crazy. My neighbor is an exorcist, I was about to call him over.”

The lanky boy had a pair of bright twinkling eyes and a broad toothy smile. His deep changing voice would crack into high-pitched wheezing-like sounds every so often as he spoke, a clear sign of the early stage of his puberty. Wooseok himself still had his child voice even though his puberty had begun.

“Hi, I’m Lee Jinhyuk. You must be crazy.” The other boy grabbed his hand and pulled him up onto his feet. “I’ve seen you come here every day just to get your ass beaten up. It’s not that I’m sticking my nose into your business or anywhere else, but I think you should stop.”

“I just need to apologize.” Wooseok’s hoarse voice cracked.

“I’ve heard about it. It’s big news here, you know? Finally everyone realizes that the staircases here are too long. Imagine coming late and having a class on the top floor. Guess that’s why my legs are growing fast.”

The boy was indeed _tall_ , about twenty centimeters taller than Wooseok.

“Are you also a freshman?” Jinhyuk asked. Wooseok nodded. “What’s your name?”

“K-Kim Wooseok.”

“Okay, Kim Crazy. Tell you what, I’ll help you send your apology to Cha Jinhee, and you’ll continue living in peace out there like a bird, soaring beautifully through the sky. How about that? Her classroom is right below mine.”

Wooseok’s gloomy features brightened up. “Y-You’d do that?”

“Sure. You’re cute, but you’d be cuter without those cuts and bruises. I’ll help you.” The taller grinned and winked.

And so, Wooseok wrote a new apology message and left it to Jinhyuk. “I brought flowers, but they were thrown away.” He pouted sadly.

“No worries, my mom has some flowers at home. I’ll pick a nice one and give it along with your letter tomorrow. Now go home and don’t come back, you cutie.” Jinhyuk smacked the smaller boy in the bottom playfully, but the pained yelp that jumped out of Wooseok’s mouth caught him off guard.

“…Something in your butt?”

“N-No!”

At last, Wooseok could go home with a calmer heart. He felt like a heavy weight had just been lifted off his chest. The young talented boy then spent the night working on a new drawing; Lee Jinhyuk, the lanky boy and his somewhat pervy broad grin.

_“Apology sent through Lee Jinhyuk,”_ he wrote.

The next day, Wooshin found himself frowning at the grinning boy on the paper.

“He looks like a moron. I don’t trust him.”

So his regular visit – which was supposed to have ended – went on. He brought a piece of note saying, _“I’m sorry, get well soon”,_ this time with a chocolate bar he found in the kitchen. He met Seungwoo and his friends again, got beaten up again, and earned himself some new wounds again.

By chance, Jinhyuk passed by while eating a bag of chips. He dropped everything to the ground as soon as he saw Wooshin.

“Hey, Kim Crazy! Didn’t I tell you not to come back??” He helped the smaller boy up while violently chomping the rest of the chips in his mouth. “I’ve given that message to Cha Jinhee already! Alright? I even replaced your flowers with a white rose! My mom hit my head with a frying pan when she found out I plucked her flower! And why are you here now? Do you want to die??”

_This moron is a good moron,_ Wooshin thought.

“What did she say?” he asked, ignoring the other’s nagging.

“She said, ‘Who is this from? There’s no name here. This isn’t from you, right?’ and I said, ‘Haha, no way! Letters and flowers aren’t my thing. I get down on my knee and serenade my woman,’ and she said, ‘Okay, clearly not from you. Then who?’ and I said, ‘From this small cutie boy, I forgot his name but I called him Kim Crazy.’ And she asked, ‘Why did you call him that?’”

Wooshin looked at the taller with an unamused face whenever he mimicked Jinhee’s voice in an annoyingly high tone.

“And I said, ‘Because he fears nothing and challenges death as if it was a mighty wild black stallion that he would conquer and ride towards the sunset! He is… a true warrior inside a little princess’ body. Crazy, right?’” Jinhyuk flew his hand towards the sky and wore that deep, melancholic expression of a poet on his face. “And she was like, ‘Wow. Okay.’”

Wooshin sighed. “Can you give these to her? Don’t say anything, please. Just keep my identity a secret.”

Jinhyuk shifted his eyes back and forth between the other’s face, the letter, and the chocolate bar. “Why? She’s got your message. Are you going to… manually, traditionally, conventionally _spam_ her?”

Wooshin didn’t feel like responding to Jinhyuk’s nonsense. “Yeah. So, can you?”

“Why?”

“…Just because.” Wooshin looked away. “I think one apology note isn’t enough. I may come and apologize again.”

Jinhyuk cocked an eyebrow. “And how long is it gonna go on?”

“Until she heals.”

“…Dude. I didn’t choose the wrong name for you.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I was supposed to wait and not post this chapter right after the previous one, but I just couldn't wait to share it lol I don't know if this story is getting more emotional and deep enough to you, but I feel like it's not as deep as I wanted it to be. I remember crying a river over my own stories years ago, some EXO fanfics, but that just doesn't happen anymore. It's either that I've lost some of my writing skills after a long hiatus or just that I'm not that emotional anymore, but either way, I hope you're getting the message and the feels from this story.
> 
> I'm not gonna ask for too much after a long break from writing lol it feels great enough to know that someone is actually reading my story, even until this far, if you're still reading. I used to depend on comments and subscribers a lot back then, but now I'm content with writing for myself and sharing it with you people. I'm still and always open for feedback, though.
> 
> I guess it got boring at some points. If you did reach this far, thanks a lot, I'd be glad to know what you think. Get ready for a roller coaster of emotions ahead ;)


	14. Chapter 14

* * *

“You really gave me those letters until I could walk again.”

Wooshin bowed his head and played with his fingers, pouting out of embarrassment. He had Wooseok’s traits too after all.

“Jinhyuk and I were teased a lot, because he always gave me letters and nice things every day.” Jinhee chuckled and wiped the tears off her eyes, feeling nostalgic. “Everyone called us JinJin couple.”

“I should’ve treated him better,” Wooshin murmured, just loud enough for only himself to hear.

“Seungwoo oppa.” Jinhee turned to the eldest in the room, who had his head low like a punished puppy. How fast the tables had turned. “Have you apologized to Wooshin? You know, he just wanted to apologize to me back then.”

Seungwoo raised his chin and looked sideways at Wooshin, who didn’t dare to look back at him. The older boy was fully aware of that mental wound he had left in him. Guilt arose in spite of his cold gaze.

“Kim Wooseok.” Seungwoo began. Wooshin flinched.

“It… It’s Wooshin.” The younger boy corrected hesitantly.

“Whatever it is.” Seungwoo sighed. “I hope you know this doesn’t justify what you did. It could even be counted as a murder attempt. I’m sure you know all of that now, and I hope you’re not that psychopathic little monster anymore. Well… On the other hand,” he sighed again, “I know I was wrong too. Just… know that I’m not a bully anymore. I apologize for hurting you too much. For…” he winced as if in pain, “…those scars on your face.”

Jinhee snapped her head towards Wooshin and her eyes rounded in surprise. “Scars? Those on your face aren’t from your uncle??”

“…No.” Wooshin averted his face away. “Scars are just scars, doesn’t matter who left them.”

Jinhee couldn’t hide her disappointment.

“I did what I did to protect you, Jinny. Seeing you get hurt once is more than enough,” Seungwoo said.

A deafening silence filled the room as Jinhee took her time to accept the excuse, which didn’t really do much to kill the flame inside her. She sucked in a deep breath before pushing out a smile that looked anything but sincere.

“…I understand. Thank you for that… but I hope you won’t say that to me and me only. What’s the use of protecting me with all your might, while at the same time you also hurt others out there? Whatever your reason is, if you use your power that way, would that make you any better than the bad guy you hurt?” she took Wooshin’s hand and stood up, staring down at the older student. “Please be true to your words. I believe you’re not the same old _monster_ too, like what you called Wooshin just now. See you tomorrow, Seungwoo oppa.”

Seungwoo’s head dropped and a bitter smile creeped across his lips, masking his tear. Jinhee didn’t look back once as she led Wooshin out the huge yet silent room, out their school building, down the lonely night road, back to _their_ home.

“So, that was why you chose to sit next to me on the first day?” Jinhee asked that night, again sneaking into Wooshin’s room when the rest of the family were asleep.

“Mhmm.” Wooshin snuggled comfortably under the cover. “Since I couldn’t approach you in our freshman year, I thought I should make use of this year to the fullest and pay for what I did. But… I kind of didn’t know how to be close to you. So I teased you and pissed you off.”

“I don’t get your logic.” Jinhee shook her head as she let out a small laugh. “So… What happened to that _girl_?”

“Who? Doyeon?” Wooshin pulled the cover up to hide his smile. “Why do you want to know?”

“Just curious.” Jinhee rolled onto her belly and shrugged, swinging her legs back and forth behind her – a small gesture that made Wooshin feel so relieved. At least he hadn’t broken those slender legs permanently.

“She moved to another city,” Wooshin gave a brief answer. “She left after the sophomore year and we lost contact after entering high school.”

“Oh, that’s too bad. Your first love didn’t stay around for long.”

Wooshin’s swollen eyes curved up into happy crescents noticing the other’s adorable little pout.

“Did I say she was _my_ first love?” he asked fondly. “She was Wooseok’s first love, not mine.”

“You could have different first loves?” the girl’s eyebrows went up, finding it quite amusing. “Who… is yours then?”

“Myself.” Wooshin’s smug smirk earned himself a pillow smack from the other. He laughed.

“Your narcissism is out of control.” Jinhee rolled her eyes and suppressed a smile from spreading across her face.

“Who’s yours?” Wooshin asked, before the other could repeat her question for a better answer.

Jinhee thought for a moment. “Hmm… It’s Lee Jinhyuk.”

Wooshin sat up straight. “NO WAY.”

“Why no way?” Jinhee cackled at the boy’s dumbstruck face. “We actually became close because he came every day and made me laugh with his lame jokes.” She could almost hear his funny voice in the back of her memory. It made her grin from ear to ear. “After a while, he kind of became my assistant, pushing my wheelchair around, then helped me with my crutches when I started to walk again.”

Wooshin was irked. “I should’ve known. He agreed to help me without asking for anything in return. So he was taking advantages all along.”

“Taking advantages?” Jinhee laughed in disbelief. “Hey, you had your own crush, he could have his! Well, yeah, she was Wooseok’s crush, but I’m sure you were very close to her too. And besides…” Her gaze trailed down to her finger that was poking on the sheets, and her lips stretched into a mischievous smile. “No, I’m just kidding. I liked him, but I don’t think it was love. Honestly… I don’t know what first love would feel like. Maybe I’ve had it, but couldn’t recognize that feeling. Who knows?”

“Hmm. First love, huh. Probably feels like nothing you’ve ever felt before,” Wooshin said nonchalantly, “because it’s the _first._ ”

“That’s a little abstract,” Jinhee said.

“Let’s test it.”

Wooshin flipped half of the cover open and patted the pillow next to him, signaling the other to slide in and lie down by his side. Jinhee’s eyebrows shot up in surprise and a hint of pink spread across her cheeks.

“T-Test what? W-What do you mean?” She scolded herself mentally for stammering like a fool.

“Some _feelings_.” Wooshin flashed a sneaky wink and immediately masked it with a stoic face.

Jinhee let her curiosity beat her common sense this time, and Wooshin hadn’t seen it coming. She lay down next to him and pulled the cover up shielding her flushed face. The boy felt his heart jump in his chest at the sudden closeness. He was really all bark, no bite, sometimes. It was him who had challenged her to enter his bubble, but now that she was _that_ close, he was the more nervous one – just that he didn’t let it show.

“J-Jinny.” Wooshin cleared his throat. “Before anything... Have you forgiven me? C-Can I… Can I hear you say it?”

Jinhee pushed the cover down slightly _,_ just enough for her to peek at the other.

_She looks like a baby,_ Wooshin thought.

_He sounds like Wooseok_ , Jinhee thought.

“Why are you still worried about it? I wouldn’t be here next to you in the same bed if I hadn’t forgiven you.” Jinhee pouted and cupped her warm cheeks in her palms. Describing their position in words was embarrassing. “Okay, I’ll say it… to assure you once and for all. Kim Wooshin, I forgive you.”

To Wooshin, those simple words were more than enough to make him feel like he had finally been freed from a prison that had locked him up for so long. His field of sight became blurry, and his teeth dug onto his bottom lip as he fought back the hot fresh tears stinging in his eyes, thinking, _I’ve cried too much today, it’s embarrassing._

“Anyways.” Jinhee offered a warm, soothing smile as she opted to change the topic, aware of the other’s state. “Do you still keep those old drawings? Of me, Yeonwoo, and Junho, and also that picture of Jinhyuk.”

Wooshin heaved a sigh to cool himself down, and came up with a teasing to fix the mood. “Are you asking that because you want Jinhyuk’s picture?”

Jinhee gaped at the question, and ended up giggling once she could read the other’s expression. “You’re so quick to get jealous.” She stuck out her tongue mockingly, teasing back.

“I’ll tell you if you answer honestly,” Wooshin offered.

“Answer what?” Jinhee asked.

“You told me once that you had had video calls with boys before,” Wooshin began, referring to their first video call. “Junho, Seungyoun, and a friend in middle school. Was that friend Jinhyuk? Are you still in touch with him?”

A big grin bloomed on the girl’s face as she once again shook her head in disbelief. “Hey, are you not going to drop it? You’re acting like a possessive pregnant housewife, you know. Yes, it was him, and no, I’m no longer in touch with him. We had nothing more than a young crush, it didn’t have to continue past middle school.”

Wooshin rolled onto his back and pouted at the ceiling. “He once told me, you told him about where your nickname came from. He said you used to call yourself Nini when you were little. Ha Nini. When you could speak better, you called yourself Jinny. He was all smiley when he talked about it. He thought it was cute. I wondered, ‘Why is he telling me this?’ So it turns out that he liked you.”

Jinhee was reminded of the time when Wooshin had told her that he had found out the origin of her nickname, that day when she had stayed over at his place. “So that’s how you knew where my nickname came from… How could he tell you that?” Jinhee pouted as well. “It wasn’t a public information.”

“…I also think it’s cute.” Wooshin turned back facing the other. “Nini.”

“ _Aish_ , don’t call me that!” Jinhee pulled the cover over her head, feeling like dying out of embarrassment. She didn’t see how an affectionate smile found its way to the other’s lips.

“I still have those drawings,” Wooshin said, “if my uncle hasn’t burnt my stuff now. Do you want them?”

“It’s not necessary to go back there just for those drawings, is it?” Jinhee mumbled under the blanket.

Wooshin couldn’t agree more. “I can draw better pictures for you. Just…”

Instinctively, Jinhee held her breath in when the mattress shifted and bounced a little, as Wooshin pulled himself closer to her. He uncovered her head, and his tender smile came into her sight.

“Just don’t cover your face.” His voice was as soft as a whisper. “I need to see it in order to draw it.”

“You’re not drawing my face right now,” Jinhee said.

“I am.” Wooshin’s gentle, delicate fingers brushed her long strands of hair aside and tucked it behind her ear. “I’m painting it in my memory.”

Jinhee would usually fake a gag in response to his cheesiness. Even so, the sincerity in his voice convinced her to let her guard down, and for once indulge in his sweetness – the addictive dark sweetness like _chocolate_ that she liked the most.

“Don’t we need to test something?” the corner of Wooshin’s lips curved into a smirk, his half-lidded eyes blinking lazily, slow and affectionate.

“Some _feelings_?” the girl squeaked, somewhat intimidated by the strong, dominant aura that the boy exuded – something she hadn’t felt before deciding to play his game.

Wooshin’s hand snaked under the blanket, wrapping his fingers around the other’s wrist as he eliminated more distance between them.

“Don’t be scared. You must be thinking this isn’t right because we’re underaged, right?” The boy chuckled. “I’m not like my uncle. I know where the line is.”

He was always able to read her mind, Jinhee found it unfair. _Not like his uncle…_ She couldn’t help but wonder if that man had done more than what Wooseok had told her.

“Close your eyes if you’re afraid,” Wooshin whispered. He pulled himself up and rested his forearm on the pillow, above the other’s head, supporting his weight as he slowly leaned down engulfing the girl in his shadow. Jinhee’s chocolate brown eyes rounded at the sight of the flawed handsome face that was inching closer – she could hear her own heart doing somersaults in her chest as his head tilted into the perfect angle for a kiss.

_Don’t close your eyes, don’t close your eyes!_ Chanted a voice in her head.

_Why?? This is way too scary, I can’t watch this! It’s already a good thing that I haven’t slapped his face away!_ She mentally whined.

_Look at those sexy lips, stupid girl, this could be only once in a lifetime!_

Jinhee was done arguing with herself. She chose to squeeze her eyes shut and let out a whimper as Wooshin’s lips touched her so tenderly – on her _cheek_.

A disappointed whine slipped out involuntarily and Jinhee pinched herself under the sheets.

“Do you want more?” Wooshin smirked noticing the sound. It gave him a much needed boost of confidence – enough to calm his racing heart. “Wasn’t it enough for just a test?”

Jinhee was too afraid that something embarrassing would be blurted out of her mouth if she spoke. Be that as it may, the glint in her eyes didn’t betray her true feeling. Wooshin had come to know those eyes; if she disliked something, those eyes would scream that loud and clear. But at that moment, those eyes were open and inviting, waiting in anticipation, _luring_ him in with their innocent charm.

“This was supposed to be just a test.” Wooshin held her rosy cheek in his hand, and nuzzled the other cheek with his nose, before giving another shy kiss on that spot. “But… Can we make this a step forward?” His lips brushed over the smooth surface of her skin and stopped next to the corner of her lips, leaving a kiss that oddly reflected his sudden loss of confidence.

“Soon, you can hold my leash. But for now… I’m… I’m still afraid. Would you… hold me? For now, I will give you this much trust.”

His vulnerable voice sent Jinhee’s walls crumbling down, bringing her to the realization that she wasn’t the only one who felt _scared_ to put her guard down. Just like a traumatized little puppy that had grown harsh and tough to protect itself; behind Wooshin’s bold outer, he was fighting so hard to open up again and let someone take him out of his cage, while a monster had once taken him just to leave so many wounds all over him. Even a single touch could leave him shaken, but it was different with her; he had let her stick her hand into his cage and touch him, and now he was giving her the permission to take him out and hold him. He wanted her to _own_ him, but there were still stinging wounds. He was too afraid that her touch would remind him that he had those wounds and put him in pain again. As long as he was untouched, he thought he could bear it – but keeping distance from her wasn’t what he wanted.

For that, Jinhee was as gentle as she could be – caressing his hair softly, and holding his face in her hands, leaving soothing strokes on his cheek with her thumb. A warm smile was gracing her lips, and her soft gaze was holding the boy’s doe eyes captive in a prolonged, hypnotizing eye contact that slowly set his guard down, putting him at ease. Slowly but sure, he was ready.

Tilting his head, he closed his eyes and gingerly planted his lips onto those smiling ones, which then readily nudged back into the kiss. A seal had finally been broken between them. As the girl’s arms snaked around his neck, and her fingers threaded through his hair so lovingly, Wooshin began to feel so full in his chest like it was going to burst. Their heartbeats were thumping equally hard in their chests, but the thrill rushing through the boy’s veins was different. Tears seeped out the corners of his closed eyes and slid down his cheeks, dripping off his chin, splashing onto Jinhee’s neck, and an alarm went off in her head – yet he lowered his body and pinned her down, in a way telling her to ignore his tears.

For a quick second, Wooshin pulled back to control his heavy breath, panting hard against the other’s lips before capturing them back in a more desperate, tearful kiss. Lips gliding and nudging against each other, deep and slow; tears mixed together, giving a salty flavor to their kiss.

Running out of breath, Wooshin broke the kiss and cried on Jinhee’s shoulder.

“It’s… It’s my first kiss. I’m going to forget all disgusting kisses before this one. _You’re_ my first kiss, _not_ that ugly monster.”

Jinhee covered the boy’s head with her arms as if she was trying to protect him, while she herself couldn’t control her own sobs. Everything about his past teenage years was horrendous. The wounds left were so bad and rotten, it hurt her just to see a part of them unveiled.

“Forget them all,” she whispered in his ear, “you’ll be okay from now on.”

Slow but sure, Wooshin’s cries subsided and his breath became steady, along with the constant comforting strokes on his back.

“J-Jinhee…”

The boy’s heavy head raised, and a pair of lost doe eyes rounded in shock.

“W-What’s happening??”

A fond smile grew on Jinhee’s lips as she let out a sigh. “Wooseok… You wanna see it yourself?”

Wooseok, who had come out at the unexpected timing, was about to get up and scurry away like a scared kitten, yet Jinhee held him still in her arms. He squeezed his eyes shut and held his breath in, trying hard to ignore the fact that their bodies were literally sticking on each other.

“Oh, come on. You were so into the kiss earlier, now you want to run away?” Jinhee chuckled. She could almost see Wooseok’s soul leave his body due to how shocked he was.

“K…Kiss?” He blinked, and his eyes became watery. “Wooshin did it first.” He threw his hand over his mouth immediately after realizing what he had just said.

“Were you going to do it first?” the girl giggled.

“N-No, that’s not what I mean! I just—I mean, I’m the original and he’s just an alter b-but he got a kiss firs—Mmff!”

Jinhee covered Wooseok’s mouth with her hand to stop his rapid rambling. Once he had calmed down, she took her hand back, and softly replaced it with her own lips shutting him up.

Wooseok was like a deer caught in the headlights. His body was stiff and his eyes were big and unblinking, that typical reaction of a young girl getting a kiss for the first time.

_What do I do??_ He panicked internally. _I-I don’t know how to kiss!_

Unsure with what he was doing, Wooseok tilted his head slightly, and darted his tongue out licking the girl’s lips timidly – or more like poking her lips with the tip of his tongue.

Jinhee smiled into the kiss and ended up bursting into laughter. He let Wooseok roll off of her and curl next to her like a shrimp. “Gosh, you’re so cute. It feels like kissing a kitten.”

Wooseok pouted sadly. “Wooshin must be better at it… He must be a good kisser.”

Jinhee bit her lip to stop laughing, realizing that the boy was genuinely sad. “I don’t know what a good kiss is like. It was my first too… We were sad, and it just happened.”

“Should I be sad too?” Wooseok asked innocently.

“Well… Do you feel sad?” Jinhee asked back. The difference between Wooshin and Wooseok’s reactions intrigued her. “He cried because of the kiss.”

Wooseok fell silent and thought for a moment. “I’d be sad if I let myself remember bad things, but I try to block them. Maybe Wooshin feels the bad feelings I don’t want to feel. He… He always shields me after all. O-Or maybe it’s not that… I-I was too surprised to be sad. M-Maybe I’ll be sad next time.”

“Next time? Should we kiss again next time?” Jinhee shot a playful, cheeky look.

Wooseok’s eyes rounded in panic. “N-No, t-that’s not it!”

“You don’t want to kiss anymore?”

“Ah—That’s not it too, p-please understand…”

Jinhee laughed in pure satisfaction seeing the embarrassed and frustrated boy on the verge of tears. She always had too much fun teasing him.

“Wooseok.” Jinhee’s lower tone caught Wooseok’s full attention. “Wooshin and Seungwoo oppa have told everything that happened in middle school.”

Wooseok’s face lost its color.

“Don’t worry, though!” Jinhee cut before he could start rambling again. “Everything is good now. I’ve forgiven you.”

The boy cried all over again.

“Oh, there, there.” Jinhee hugged him and patted his head, finding it funny somehow to repeat the process.

“Th…Thank you for forgiving me, Jinhee,” Wooseok said, “Even though it was Wooshin… I’m responsible for what my alters do. They’re me.”

Jinhee couldn’t help but shed proud tears – Wooseok had finally understood and accepted the fact that he and his alters were one.

The constant soft brush through his hair eventually lured Wooseok to give in to his drowsiness and sent him to his slumber. Jinhee didn’t feel like going back to her room yet. She found herself unable to stop staring and smiling at his peaceful sleeping face.

_Aren’t I the luckiest?_

She heaved a contented sigh and a lovestruck smile grew on her lips.

But then those lips parted and formed a small circle as the boy’s eyes fluttered open once again. Under the blanket, he found her hand and intertwined their fingers together, and his tired, half-lidded eyes blinked slowly at the other’s puzzled face.

“How… did the test turn out?” he smiled. “Did it feel like nothing you’ve ever felt before?”

Dimples appeared on Jinhee’s cheeks, complementing her bashful smile. She gave a shy nod as she copied the other’s words, “Because… it’s the _first._ ”

Wooshin pulled her into his arms and held her close to his chest.

“I’ve won in life.”

* * *

“You guys, stop it. I’m going to puke.”

Hangyul’s comment was supported by nods from the rest of the heads at their lunch table. At one end of the table, Jinhee and Wooshin were sitting face to face, their chins propped up in their hands, staring and smiling at each other like two lovebirds drunk in love. Flirty lines didn’t stop slipping out of Wooshin’s mouth even though Jinhee had long turned into a blushing, giggling mess.

At the other end, Yohan was too busy pretending to be deaf. He focused on teasing Hyeongjun instead, finding the younger boy’s shy demeanor quite adorable. It wasn’t the best solution to the raging jealousy he was suppressing, but at least it was a good distraction. The puppy-like younger boy brought out the naughty big brother side of him.

On their way back to class, walking side by side, intentionally Wooshin brushed his hand against Jinhee’s, and their fingers were automatically intertwined together. Hangyul sighed and rolled his eyes behind them.

“Yohan, let’s hold hands.” He nudged the boy next to him. “We’re the only ones who don’t have anything to hold.”

“These three also don’t hold hands!” Yohan avoided Hangyul’s hand and pointed at the three juniors behind them; Junho, Hyeongjun, and Eunsang.

“They’re babies, they suck thumbs and don’t hold hands. We’re _not_ babies.” Hangyul sulked like how a manly guy would sulk, glancing at the two pairs walking ahead every so often. Seungyoun and Yeonwoo were that carefree couple who had their own language, cackling madly at jokes nobody else understood, being each other’s happy virus; while Wooshin and Jinhee were the calmer ones, keeping their voices low just for themselves to hear, smiling to their shy little touches and sweet talks.

However, there was another difference that the group found quite interesting – Seungyoun and Yeonwoo had been quick to openly declare their relationship, and even treated the group to a nice dessert night, being so proud to call themselves a couple. But it was a different case with Wooshin and Jinhee; while acting like an obvious couple, they told their friends that they weren’t in a relationship _yet._

“Hey, hey, stop right there,” Hangyul pointed at Wooshin and Jinhee, who were standing outside the male restroom. “Hey, Cha Jinhee, are you going to go in there and hold his hose while he’s peeing? Let him go alone.”

The other boys guffawed as a hint of pink spread across Jinhee’s face. “I-I wasn’t going to go inside! Am I nuts??”

“You’re not nuts, but he may nut if you go in,” the big boy mumbled, and immediately got a kick in the calf from the horrified Yohan.

“Watch your stupid joke, there are babies here!” Yohan waved his hands telling the puzzled younger boys to hurry and go back to their classrooms.

“What does ‘he may nut’ mean?” Junho asked Hyeongjun and Eungsang as they walked away. The other two answered with a clueless shrug. “I’ll google it later then.”

Jinhee and Yeonwoo disappeared into the female restroom, while Seungyoun tailed Wooshin into the empty male restroom, opting to use the urinal right next to the smaller boy.

“Don’t you understand the concept of personal space?” Wooshin asked flatly, looking straight at the wall wearing an unamused face. Seungyoun gave a giggle and nothing more as the answer.

“I’m curious. Why haven’t you guys made it official?” the taller boy asked. “You both are clearly in love.”

“We don’t have to put a label on it, do we? It’ll only make things sadder if it has to end someday,” Wooshin said matter-of-factly.

“Well… As for me, I’ll try my best to ensure it won’t end.” Seungyoun flashed a cheeky smile.

“You can’t see what will happen in the future.” Wooshin caught the other boy leaning closer out of the corner of his eye, and snapped his head to see Seungyoun peeking down into his urinal. “What the hell are you looking at, you buffoon? You want me to pluck your eyes out?”

“Nothing.” Grinning, Seungyoun looked away and mumbled, “So, _not_ everything on you is small.”

“I heard that, you giant moron.” Wooshin zipped up his pants and threw a high kick to the other’s butt, making him laugh out loud.

“Why did you kick me? It was a compliment!” Seungyoun went on cackling as he followed Wooshin to the sinks to wash his hands.

Wooshin side-eyed the other with his murderous gaze. “How dare you look at my property. I was keeping that view for someone else.”

Seungyoun’s high-pitched laugh boomed in the restroom, so loud that everyone outside could hear it.

“Are you going to go _that_ far? You’re gonna show it to her?” the bigger boy cracked a mischievous cackle. He cupped his hands around his mouth and shouted, “CHA JINHEEEEE! WOOSHIN HAS SOMETHING TO SH—”

“SHUT UP!”

Irritated, Wooshin gathered some tap water in his cupped hands and splashed it at the other boy. Seungyoun yelped and jumped backward, successfully dodging the attack, yet the other boy gathered more water and the two ended up playing cat and mouse in the restroom.

“Stop! I’m sorry!” Seungyoun laughed and stretched his arms out to stop the other. He swatted the water off Wooshin’s hands and quickly caught his smaller body from behind, before he could go back to the sink.

“Let go of me, dumbass.” Wooshin wriggled in the other’s arms.

“Aww. Are you mad? Wooshinie is my favorite friend, so don’t be mad at me, _okaaay_?” Seungyoun drew out his weapon of excessive cuteness.

“Let go and I’ll tolerate you just this once.” Wooshin didn’t have to wait until he was released from Seungyoun’s hold; the tall smiley boy stepped back immediately.

“You’re not that comfortable with skinship, hm? I get it, only Jinhee can touch you.” Seungyoun giggled. “Come, let’s go back to class.”

When they went out, the girls seemed to be engrossed in a serious whispered conversation, which went on even as they continued their way back to class. Seungyoun and Wooshin were left walking side by side behind them.

For the first time, Wooshin felt uneasy towards Seungyoun.

_“Wooshinie is my favorite friend.”_

Had he been too cold towards that cuddly big boy? Seungyoun had been nothing but caring and sweet, he put up with his rudeness so well.

Seungyoun was walking with his hands in his pockets, a smile permanently plastered on his face, oblivious to the other boy’s state of mind.

Wooshin cleared his throat and straightened up his back to keep his composure as he slowly shifted closer to Seungyoun, until their elbows bumped each other. The taller flicked his head towards him right away, his smile growing slightly wider.

“You don’t mind being this close to me?” Seungyoun chuckled, noticing how much distance between them that had been eliminated by the other boy. “That’s new. You always keep distance, I was starting to worry if I smell bad or something.”

“Your perfume smells nice.” The compliment came out as a mumble, but clear enough for Seungyoun to hear, and enough to make him gleeful. “Don’t get me wrong. I just think it’s bad to be rude after you said I’m your f-favorite friend. I don’t have any other intentions—”

“I get it.” Seungyoun cut the other’s rambling and laughed. He wrapped an arm around Wooshin’s shoulders and prepared himself to be pushed away – except that the smaller boy didn’t push him away, even though there was a hint of discomfort on his face.

In all honesty, to Wooshin, opening up to a male was much harder than to a female. He used to think that there was a higher chance of getting hurt by being too close to a male, because they’d have more force and tendency to hurt him. But this mindset had slowly changed since he had met Jinhee’s father, the very kind and loving doctor who had put a roof over his head. Meanwhile, the way he saw Seungyoun had started to change when he had saved him from the street and brought him to Jinhee’s home. That was how he was assured that the boy didn’t have any ill intentions towards him. It was just that Wooshin needed more time to be physically comfortable with him – or anyone in general – just like with Jinhee.

“You know, this almost feels like winning a lottery.” Seungyoun snickered. “Don’t worry, I’ll still be careful. You can trust me.”

Wooshin looked away to hide the faint smile on his lips. “Thanks.”

“No need to thank me! Let’s be close friends.”

Friendship and love; he was finally getting his life together.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you think of this as a roller coaster ride, this is the part where we go all the way up and reach the peak. And what happens after that? We'll see :)) thank you for reading this story!


	15. Chapter 15

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is almost twice as long as the other chapters before, there's a major turn of events and a lot of things that happen here. If you have plenty of time staying at home because of the coronavirus, I hope this chapter can entertain you. lmao enjoy!
> 
> !TRIGGER WARNING!: brief mention/description of child molestation; physical abuse + some curse words.

* * *

Wooseok and his two active alters had been spending time with Doctor Cha. In the past two weeks, the doctor had managed to conduct a few sessions with Wooseok, and a couple more with Wooshin, which hadn’t gone further than getting to know the big picture of his system, parts of their trauma, and a little about their background. The doctor never tried too hard to keep the session going on; whenever the boy got too overwhelmed with being pried and having to talk about his life, Doctor Cha would kindly give him a break and continue later on. During the breaks, he’d get his children, Jinhee and Junho, to be around his patient until he could smile and laugh again. Both Wooseok and Wooshin were content with that method.

However, things were quite different with Woo. Jinhee had started to believe that the naughty little boy existed just to have fun, literally. It was so tricky to get him engaged in a serious talk.

That one sunny Saturday, while the doctor and his kids had plenty of time to make use of, they sat together in the bright, sun-lit living room, with a set of drawing kit sitting on the coffee table. Wooseok, looking adorable in a white Bambi shirt and a pair of light blue shorts – another new clothes from the mother of the family – was sitting on the fluffy grey rug, between the siblings. He slipped a finger behind his round glasses and rubbed his eye, then shook his head a little, feeling the presence of another person inside him trying to push out. The father and his kids waited in anticipation.

“Ah…” He squeezed his eyes shut and quickly got rid of his glasses, nearly tossing them away if it weren’t for Jinhee who snatched them by reflex. He rubbed his eyes with his balled hands and blinked a few times.

“Dizzy.” The high-pitched, child-like voice sent huge smiles to the other three’s faces. The very awaited little alter had come.

“Woo!” Junho exclaimed, and the other boy flicked his head towards him, beaming at the sight of him.

“Junho hyung!” Woo pounced at Junho and knocked him down onto his back. Jinhee and her father laughed as the giggly boys rolled around on the floor tickling each other. There was a pure, genuine happy smile plastered on Woo’s face when Junho ruffled his hair, the kind of smile that could be seen only when the child alter was in action.

_What a pretty smile,_ Jinhee thought, completely lovestruck.

“Junho is really Woo’s favorite person, huh?” The doctor chuckled.

The boys stopped rolling around with Woo sitting on Junho’s belly, beaming down at him. “Hyung, let’s play outside!” He bounced a little, knocking the air out of the younger teen.

“Oof—Ah, I-I was thinking that we should play here instead!” Junho cracked a somewhat awkward laugh, afraid that he might upset the other boy. He pointed at the drawing kit on the table. “Look, we have lots of crayons!”

Woo gasped loudly and his doe eyes sparkled seeing the colorful box of crayons and a big Pororo drawing book next to it.

“Let’s draw Bambi,” Junho pointed at the cartoon deer on Woo’s shirt. Apparently the latter hadn’t noticed what he was wearing, because a delighted squeal then jumped out of him as soon as he looked down.

“Bambi! So cute!”

The other three didn’t have to try hard to get him into the position that they had planned; he willingly plopped back down on his butt and proceeded to get busy with the drawing book on the table. Doctor Cha, also sitting on the floor, across the glass table, rested his folded arms on the surface and lowered his head to meet the boy’s eye level. A fatherly smile found its way to the man’s lips as he watched Woo stick his tongue out and wear an adorable, serious face, while gliding a piece of brown crayon over the blank paper, drawing a funny face of a deer. It looked just like a normal, messy drawing of a little kid, not a realistic masterpiece that Wooseok or Wooshin could easily draw.

“Hi, Woo,” Doctor Cha greeted, “that’s a very cute deer you’re drawing there.”

“Thank you, uncle Chacha!” Woo paused just to flash a happy grin at the man. The doctor burst into laughter hearing the nickname that Woo had given him.

“Great, we’re all called Chacha now.” Jinhee chuckled. She scooted closer to Woo and softly ran a hand through his fluffy black hair – a gesture that was taken as a motherly affection by the boy. After a few series of little events that had occurred while she had been trying to get close to him, Jinhee had acknowledged Woo’s need of such affection – especially after he had accidentally called her _mommy_ a couple of times.

Now, there was the tricky part; they had to get him to stay still and talk about himself as Wooseok’s alter. They hadn’t been so successful at it before, since he found it way too boring and would rather run around the house like a hyperactive little puppy. But, at least, he was sitting still at the moment. The drawing kit turned out to be very helpful.

So, they began from the most basic questions they could ask, which they had asked before but had been ignored by the kid.

“Wow, you’re really talented! How old are you, Woo?” Doctor Cha pulled a funny amazed face. “Let me guess. If you can draw this well, I guess you must be ten years old?”

Woo giggled, seeming so delighted by the compliment. “No! Woo is younger than that. Does that mean Woo is as talented as a ten-year-old?”

_He likes compliments that much, huh?_ Jinhee smiled to herself. _Well, that’s a familiar trait._

“Younger?” Doctor Cha raised his eyebrows high. “Wow, I can’t believe it! You’re really smart, to be younger than ten years old! Then, you must be nine?” He tested. Nine was Wooseok’s age when his parents had sent him away.

Woo’s giggle turned into a full laugh, proud of himself. He dropped his crayon and showed eight of his fingers. “Eight years old! Woo is turning nine this year, but now Woo is still eight years old!”

_Then perhaps it’s true that he has Wooseok’s childhood memory, from the time period before he moved in with his uncle,_ Jinhee thought.

They also caught an important information; Woo also aged as an alter. He wasn’t one that was stuck in time, being a child of the same age permanently. If this alter persisted until years ahead, he could grow up into a teenager.

“Wow, your mommy and daddy must be so proud of you.” Doctor Cha smiled, smoothly throwing a bait.

Woo took his crayon back in his hand and continued his drawing. His eyebrows creased slightly.

“Daddy hasn’t been talking to Woo. Maybe daddy is upset.” He pouted.

The other three were alarmed. They had just discovered something new – a hint that could lead to something bigger.

“What is your daddy like, Woo?” the doctor asked, “Is he handsome like you?”

“Mhmm!” Woo nodded and laughed once again. Jinhee was starting to believe that perhaps, Wooshin’s narcissism was just a built-in characteristic that had existed ever since his childhood.

“Daddy is handsome, he is tall and strong too! He always wears black clothes and his hair is deep, deep black. It used to be dark red when he was younger! Daddy is really cool, but he never smiles.” Woo shrugged.

_Sounds like an emo to me,_ Jinhee thought.

Woo flipped a new blank page open and changed his crayon to the light blue one, drawing a square with it. “This is the glass room where daddy sleeps in. There is a bed in it,” he added a bed inside.

“So, they do have an inner world after all,” the doctor mumbled to himself.

Woo continued to explain and draw more elements that he was describing, “There is a ‘do not disturb’ sign on the outside. The door has daddy’s name.” He drew a rectangular sign on the glass door, and on the sign he wrote, _‘Shin’._

Jinhee and Junho gaped at the name.

“Shin is your daddy?” Junho asked. _So, these alters could be related to each other?_

Woo nodded eagerly as he drew himself, a small stickman, outside the blue square. “Woo always plays outside this glass box, and daddy watches from the inside. In the past, he was always angry at us, even Woo was scared of him! He tried to hurt us when he was mad… He wanted to punish us because he thought we were bad at protecting ourselves. But don’t worry, now he is quiet and calm. He doesn’t get angry because Woo always tries to cheer him up. Sometimes daddy lets Woo play in his room, but he never wants to get out. He won’t get out as long as Woo doesn’t get hurt playing outside.”

The way Woo smiled in adoration as he described his mental father made Jinhee think, _We might have misunderstood Shin’s motives._

The kid alter continued with a concerned look, “Ah, Woo is afraid that daddy would get mad and hurt Wooshin hyung if he comes out. So, Woo always tells daddy that everything is okay.”

Doctor Cha piped up as he figured out, “Then, I suppose we can say that Woo is the gatekeeper in the system.”

“What does that mean?” Junho asked.

“He can control the access to Shin, the persecutor alter who may intentionally hurt Wooseok’s body or the alter system. Shin may do it to control or teach them to behave, in order to prevent worse abuse in the future. So, it’s probably why Shin hasn’t come out for a long time,” the doctor explained. “Our little gatekeeper has been keeping him in.”

Woo furrowed his eyebrows, not really grasping what the doctor meant. “Should Woo get him out, uncle?”

“No!” Jinhee and Junho yelled in unison, reacting a little too fast. Seeing that Woo was taken aback, they masked their worry with an awkward laugh.

Jinhee rambled, “I mean, your daddy might like it better in that room. It must be peaceful in there, we don’t have to force him out if he doesn’t want to. There are many annoying things out here, he might get a headache and then get angry if he comes out… right?” She forced out a grin.

Much to their relief, Woo giggled and nodded in agreement. “Woo also thinks it’s better for daddy to stay inside.” But then, he lay his head on the table and pouted as he drew another stickman outside the box, using a pink crayon this time, with the addition of long hair – a female. “Daddy misses this auntie, though. She was nice and kind to Woo, but she is gone now.”

“W-Who is she?” Jinhee asked, “Son Doyeon?”

“That was not her name.” Woo shook his head. “Min… Min Sooyoung. She was the same age as daddy… If she was still here, she would be twenty nine years old now. This auntie had a younger brother. Four years younger. His name was similar… Min Wooyoung.”

The Cha siblings were left in shock, barely able to process the information about the past, undiscovered female alter, while the father took all of it calmly.

Jinhee couldn’t help but feel concerned about what could have possibly happened – Wooseok, still just a junior high school student, having a woman in her mid-twenties inside his body. An image of young skinny Wooseok applying a bright red lipstick played in her mind. She shuddered.

_Anyways… That means Shin is twenty nine now. He’s an adult,_ Jinhee thought. _We really need to be careful if he ever comes out again._

“Min Wooyoung, the melancholic guy who liked poems, right?” Junho said. “If I remember correctly, from what Wooseok hyung said, his first alter was Wooshin, and then he had Wooyoung and Hyunwoo… and then Shin and Woo came later, after Wooseok hyung had a crush and Wooyoung was gone. But... How could Woo know about Wooyoung? Wow, phew, so many Woo’s.”

Woo lifted his head off the table and gave Junho a look that made him feel like he had said something really stupid. “That is not true, hyung. Woo and uncle Wooyoung were close! He was the only one who talked to Woo, because back then Woo didn’t have daddy… Hyunwoo hyung was always crying and didn’t want to talk to anyone, and Wooshin hyung hated us. Ah, Wooshin hyung has always wanted to own the body, so he pretends we don’t exist.” He drew another stickman on the bottom right corner of the paper. “Our room is big, but it’s blank white… there’s nothing in it other than daddy’s glass box and three of us. But Wooshin hyung sits here, so far away. He never turns facing us. He doesn’t know what Woo and daddy do. Woo knows he can hear Woo’s voice, but he sees nothing.”

At this moment, they realized that even though Woo was the youngest alter, he was actually the key – the gatekeeper who really knew the most about the system. Wooseok had been late to find out about the presence of this child alter; he had existed since much earlier than he knew.

“That is the problem,” Doctor Cha said, “You see, this blank white room, their inner world, it’s supposed to be a place where all alters can see and interact with each other. That is how Woo knows what Shin looks like as an alter – they don’t look like Wooseok in there, since they have their own appearance. But Wooseok is not in this inner space. Now, Wooshin is the primary protector, and the only alter who has ever communicated with Wooseok, even though just by using written notes. With that role, he could be a bridge between Wooseok and this inner world, but he hasn’t opened up to the other alters yet. In order to have this system work together, they should be able to communicate with each other, including with Wooseok. And it starts with accepting and understanding each other.”

“Then, we need Wooshin to make peace with Woo and his daddy first, so they can accept each other,” Jinhee figured out. “Right, Woo?”

Woo nodded and smiled innocently. “Woo would love to play with Wooshin hyung too! Sometimes playing with daddy is boring because he doesn’t talk. But Wooshin hyung seems cool! He is very handsome and confident. Not as cool as daddy, though, he’s smaller than daddy, but his clothes are cool and sporty. He nags at Wooseok hyung sometimes! His grumbling is so funny. Does Wooseok hyung even listen to him?” He giggled.

Jinhee caressed the boy’s hair and gazed at him lovingly. He was a lovely talkative kid when he wasn’t running around and snatching people’s belongings to get some attention. From the outside, he looked just like a giggly teenager who oddly spoke of himself in third person, a more cheerful and carefree version of Kim Wooseok, but now Jinhee could almost see little Wooseok sitting in front of her. The little boy from the photographs in his room. But this little Wooseok wasn’t the same, unharmed child anymore; even though he was bright and bubbly, there were wounds left inside him.

Eventually, the crayons and the drawing book were abandoned, and Woo’s smile faded as the doctor tried to lead him back to the darker side of his past, slowly and carefully. They had no choice but to bring him there, in order to find out what had happened.

“Woo, would you tell us about your nightmares?” Doctor Cha asked in a fatherly tone.

Just the mention of it was enough to make the child alter curl in fear. Like a lost little chick looking for its mother, he turned his head side to side, and ended up snuggling into Jinhee’s arms in desperate need for some sort of maternal protection. The urgency in his gestures pushed Jinhee to put herself in the position as his mother.

In a normal situation, Junho would burst into laughter seeing how the older boy, with his whole teen body, curled in Jinhee’s lap like a giant baby. Well, he found the scene quite funny still, but when he saw a trail of tears on Woo’s face, Junho could only panic and join his sister hugging the child alter.

It managed to give Woo a sense of safety. He felt like being hugged by his own parents.

“The dreams won’t go away.” Woo sniffled and hiccuped while Jinhee wiped away his tears that wouldn’t stop coming out. The tip of his nose was turning red. “They’re always the same… W-When mommy and daddy went away, and then, uncle and auntie brought Woo in… but uncle… uncle always hurt Woo, many times! Mommy and daddy didn’t know it, uncle lied!"

After a pause, Woo tugged on his hair and let out a long, pained, agonizing squeal that made the siblings burst into tears. He choked out a sob that gradually intensified into a full wailing fit. It tortured all of them, but they couldn’t stop there, it’d always end up like this and they wouldn’t get anywhere if they stopped.

So Jinhee hugged him tight and held his head to her chest, whispering repeatedly in his ear, “Mommy is here, Woo, it’s okay… It’s okay, mommy is here.”

Woo fisted on Jinhee’s shirt, bawling and squirming as if he was in great pain. “It hurts, mommy… Stop him! Please stop him!”

“What did he do? What did he do to you?” Jinhee cried, starting to quiver as she watched where Woo’s other hand was; it was trapped between his tightly squeezed thighs, reaching down to his bottom. The idea that crossed Jinhee’s mind was too terrifying to imagine.

“It hurts… It hurts here… He put something inside… U-Uncle did it when auntie wasn’t home, he—he put a candy in Woo’s mouth and told Woo not to say anything when mommy and daddy came back! He always did it, he always hurt Woo every time he played with Woo! Mommy and daddy always left Woo with him every day, but—but Woo was too scared to tell them!”

That was when Jinhee lost it; not only that her horrifying thought was confirmed to be true, but to make it even worse, now they found out the that the uncle’s filthy _crime_ had possibly begun even before Wooseok had moved in with him.

If that was really the case, his disorder might have developed much earlier than he knew.

“We’ve got to report that disgusting rapist to the police!” Jinhee growled. “What kind of monster would have the heart to molest a little kid?!”

“No, noona, wait, don’t shout,” Junho tried to calm his sister, while Woo’s bawling intensified. Their father quickly went away and came back with a white pill and a glass of water. He made the crying boy take the medicine and pulled him away from Jinhee, so he could cradle the boy himself, giving soft comforting pats on his bottom – the part that seemed to be hurting for real at the moment. After a while, Woo calmed down from his crying fit and became perfectly still, looking peaceful in the doctor’s arms.

“Whoa, that pill works like magic,” Junho mumbled in awe, “I may need one for my mental breakdown at school.”

Jinhee groaned and sank her face into her palms. “I can’t believe his uncle really went that far. We need to do something about it, Dad. Come on.”

Doctor Cha looked down at the tear-stained sleepy face in his arms, feeling stinging hot tears in his own eyes.

“Hyunwoo…” Woo murmured, “Hyunwoo hyung… he knew more. It hurt… he wanted to _free_ us… but… Woo didn’t let him.”

The twelve-year-old suicidal alter. The last thing they wanted was to have him back.

Exhausted, eventually Woo gave in to his drowsiness. Doctor Cha carried him back to his room and tucked him into bed.

“Dad—”

“The police, right?” Doctor Cha cut his daughter’s words and sighed into his hand. “Once we take a step that way, it’s going to be a long complicated way that may end up in the court, involving his parents too. We need to explain the situation to Wooseok and Wooshin first. We’ve just discovered a critical information from their childhood, which I’m sure they’re not aware of. It’s not going to be easy for them to accept it.”

They could only hope that those two would come out soon so they could get things over with – and that Shin would not be triggered deep inside his glass box, after all the chaos and trauma recollection that his mental child had to go through.

* * *

“Now, Wooshin, it’s time to tell about your perspective.”

“Well, to put it simply, I’m the most capable in the system and the others are way too flawed. So, I deserve to stay in the body.”

Wooshin crossed his arms and looked away, looking unhappy. It was rather an endearing sight, how he tried to keep a tough image while his body was snuggled comfortably under a weighted blanket in his bed. Since he had been having trouble with sleeping lately, Doctor Cha had bought him that blanket to provide the sense of comfort and safety at night. That added weight pressing down on his body could help him feel calm and protected – which was also why it could come in handy during the talk therapy.

Jinhee rolled her eyes. “Why are you promoting yourself? This is not an elimination program, you know.”

“It works the same way,” Wooshin shrugged, getting defensive. “If you try to heal us, that means you’re gonna try to eliminate our presence, no? Is that what you want? I thought you liked me.”

“I _do_ like you. But you’re getting my intention wrong.” Jinhee huffed and crossed her arms.

“Then you probably don’t like me as much as I like you.” Wooshin pouted and crossed his arms as well.

Doctor Cha chuckled at the teenagers’ banter. They didn’t even realize they had just confessed their feelings for each other in the presence of the father.

“Well,” the doctor cleared his throat, “back to the topic. Do you have any comments on Woo’s story?”

Suddenly feeling uneasy, Wooshin shifted under the blanket and rubbed his nape. “I don’t know. He makes me sound kind of power hungry. Yeah, I mean, sure, I’d like to own the body. But don’t the others also want the same?” He turned to Jinhee. “Hasn’t the nerd been trying to get rid of me?”

“No, he just wants to get better.” Jinhee shrugged. “I’ve told you, he’d keep you if possible. He realized that your presence has helped him a lot.”

“Of course. What can he do without me?” Wooshin’s smug smirk earned yet another eyeroll from the girl.

“But since being dissociated is frustrating to him and gives him anxiety, not to mention that Shin is still in there, he has no choice but to try to heal. Can you please understand where he’s coming from?” Jinhee sighed and placed her hand on Wooshin’s as her voice softened, “I don’t have to list down all the terrible things he feels, because you know them better, don’t you? He wants you to get better too.”

“I don’t think he cares that much.” Wooshin looked away. “I don’t care about him too.”

“Oh, don’t you?” Jinhee raised an eyebrow.

Remaining silent, Doctor Cha let the conversation go on and secretly observed the changes of Wooshin’s expression. He thought, perhaps it was a good idea to involve his daughter in the session; the boy clearly had feelings for her, it helped them get to his softer side. At least he hadn’t blurted out anything overly rude so far.

“…I don’t care _that_ much.” Wooshin snorted, giving in. “No, look, I exist for a reason. You all call me his protector or whatever, and yeah I did come out when that weakling couldn’t handle stuff, so I’ll just accept that label. But just because I had to take the beating for him, doesn’t mean I did it because I cared. It just happened. It’s my job. And about the other two in here,” he tapped his own head, “I genuinely don’t care about them. I don’t care about the inner world that kid told you. They’re like a useless extra weight on the ride, makes things harder for me. For the nerd too. Not that I care, but you care about him.”

Realizing how headstrong he really was, suddenly Jinhee felt helpless. She was already emotionally worn out after positioning herself as Woo’s mother. Unable to say a word, she just looked at Wooshin with her glistening round eyes, her pouty lips quivering.

Noticing that she was on the verge of tears, Wooshin sat up straight in panic and instinctively reached out for a hug. “Oh, no, no.” Then he remembered that her father was watching – he froze and turned to the older male like a stunned deer.

“Go ahead, go ahead.” Doctor Cha motioned his hand giving him the permission. The scene was strangely familiar.

Right, Wooseok had also done it once, waiting for his permission before hugging his daughter.

“I’m sorry.” Wooshin took Jinhee into a firm embrace. Unlike Wooseok, though, his hug lasted much longer even under the father’s watch. “Was I too harsh? Did I say something rude? I’m sorry, I didn’t mean it. Wait, no, I _did_ mean it when I said I didn’t care about them, but I didn’t mean to make you sad.”

“Woo cares about you.” Jinhee’s tired voice was muffled by the other’s shoulder. “He thinks you’re cool and handsome. He listens to you nagging at Wooseok and he finds it funny. He said he’d like to play with you too, because his daddy never talks and it’s boring. If only you’d turn around and see him…”

Wooshin let out a heavy sigh. “Fine, if that’s what you want. I’ll listen to him once in a while. Just Woo. Not the devil too.”

_Funny, I thought you were the devil when we first met._ Jinhee kept her thought to herself. It was already a miracle that Wooshin was willing to cooperate, finally.

It was then the doctor’s turn to take the lead, for the hardest part – the trauma processing. It wasn’t Wooshin’s first session, and thus not the first time he intentionally tried to retrieve bad memories. The first time had been quite explosive, but the second one had come out better, as he had had a calmer reaction to the therapy that Doctor Cha had practiced. But this time, it would be the first time he heard of the memory he didn’t possess.

“Are you sure you’re ready to hear it?” Doctor Cha asked for the boy’s confirmation a few times before he proceeded.

“It can’t be anything worse than what I’ve gone through,” Wooshin said nonchalantly, pulling his blanket up to his chin. “Even if that kid and I were created at the same time, he went missing until his devil of a dad appeared. So I suffered more than he did.”

Despite him trying to act tough, Jinhee decided that it might be a good precaution to stay close and hold him, knowing from experience that he wasn’t emotionally as strong as he looked.

And it was indeed a good precaution; the moment Doctor Cha told him about Woo’s dark memories, and also the child alter’s heart-wrenching reaction upon the trauma recollection, Wooshin found himself sobbing quietly in Jinhee’s hug.

For the first time ever, he felt that he wasn’t alone. There were other parts who weren’t just mere useless extra weight, as what he had called them; they bore their own weight that he didn’t bear. Even though he felt like he was the only one who had to take all the pain, the truth was that he didn’t carry the whole thing on his shoulders, it was all a _shared_ pain. Not the kind of individual pain that had nothing to do with each other, but the _same_ pain from the _same_ past. Like a whole shared giant pan of pizza with some strange, bitter topping, same topping for everyone, of course, but each of them might get a slice of different size. He didn’t have to swallow everything down by himself until he threw up.

Suddenly, Wooshin felt bad for the child alter. He felt bad for himself. For Wooseok. He found them so pitiful.

Caressing the boy’s head lovingly, Jinhee said, “Woo told us, Shin used to get mad and want to punish you all because he believed you were bad at protecting yourselves. He wanted to give you a lesson. He is a father after all. But now that he knows Woo is okay, he is fine with staying confined in there. Don’t you think… he has the same intention? To protect? Just that... he has _different_ ways of expressing that. Would you… maybe hear him out, if you could?”

It wasn’t that Wooshin wanted to give in. Being stubborn was his inherent characteristic. He still believed he would do just fine without establishing some sort of connection with the other parts, just like the previous years that he had spent that way. Detached and independent. But as much as he liked the idea of keeping things as they were, now he couldn’t just ignore the fact that the other alters were, in a way, _helping_ him bear some parts of his wounds. Shouldn’t he at least show a little appreciation for that?

So, he answered with a nod.

“About your uncle… Should we report him to the police?”

“…I’d like to know what Wooseok thinks about it.”

* * *

“P-Please don’t do that. Don’t involve the police.”

Wooseok’s answer did not come as a surprise.

“Why not? Because ‘he is your parent too and he’s paid for your needs’?” Jinhee quoted the reason that Wooseok always used.

Blinking his glassy, teary eyes, with a lot of struggle, Wooseok forced himself to speak his feelings out. “I… I’m not ready… t-to be found out. This disorder, I-I’m ashamed of it… I don’t want my parents to find out. I don’t want—I won’t be able to talk about it… to them, to the police… to anyone out there. If you take it to the police, they will ask me. They will ask me questions, and I won’t be able to answer. If it gets to the court, I can’t testify. Please… P-Please don’t make me go through all of it. I’m okay right now, I’ll be okay like this, please let me be. I… I promise I’ll be good to my alters. We’ll be okay… Please.”

After Wooseok got down on his knees and begged, they reluctantly gave in to his wish, even though it meant they also had to live biting their tongues and keeping his uncle’s crime under wraps. They were out against their own conscience.

Though, it absolutely did not mean that they would stop helping Wooseok and his alters get better.

One day, Doctor Cha went to Wooseok and gave him a brand new, thick black journal along with a luxury pen, which took him by surprise.

“Wooseokie, from now on, you can write anything and everything you want in this journal. Please take this as a diary that you will share with your alters. I’ve added tab dividers to mark which section is for you, for Wooshin, for Woo, and even for Shin, plus a number of empty tabs, just in case. You can even write in your alters’ sections if you have something to tell them. We will not open and read it if you don’t let us, I promise. It’s you and your alters’ privacy. Let’s learn to build a nice and friendly communication in your system, shall we?”

The diary then became one of Wooseok’s most treasured belonging. The first time he wrote in Woo and Wooshin’s sections, the sensation he felt was close to that of leaving a message for a girl he liked. He couldn’t sleep wondering if Wooshin and Woo would write back. The first time he found two different, messy handwritings that was not his own in his section, it felt like his crush had just said yes to his proposal.

_“Hello, Wooseok hyung! Thank you for the message and the Bambi drawing, it’s so cute! :D This book looks like a grandpa’s book, but Woo loves it, because Woo can finally talk to you and Wooshin hyung too! It makes Woo very happy ^^ Please write more messages, hyung! ♡_

_-Woooooo-“_

_“Hi, nerd. This is stupid, but whatever, I’ll give it a try. Not gonna be more childish than the kid up there ^._

_-Wooshin-“_

Those messages gave Wooseok a strange, tingling sensation, a kind of happiness that he had never felt before. His alters, too, felt the same, even though Wooshin would never show giddiness over finding some new messages left for him. They carried that book around most of the time, keeping it in safe places, being extra careful not to lose it. In a short span of time, they managed to fill several pages with messages written in three different kinds of handwriting. Only one marked section was left empty – Shin’s.

Woo was the first to write on Shin’s page.

_“Daddy, it’s not so bad out here. Wooseok hyung and Wooshin hyung are really nice. If daddy wants to come out, please be nice to them~ Okay, daddy?_

_-Woo^^-“_

It was a little disappointing to Woo, and not surprising to others, that their oldest alter gave no response. It was okay, they thought, three of them were doing well so far even without his participation.

One morning, after several days of the diary routine, Wooseok went to Doctor Cha, eyes as wide as saucers.

“Father… I can hear Wooshin talk to me!”

* * *

The sky had turned dark. Jinhee and Wooshin had stayed until late at school to complete a project that was due the next day. Then that they had gotten it done, the pair were walking together along the sidewalk towards the bus stop.

“You’ve been more diligent lately,” Jinhee said, smiling at the ground.

“Maybe it’s the nerd behavior rubbed off on me.” Wooshin chuckled. “Doesn’t mean I’m turning into a nerd, though. I’ll always be a cool guy.”

Wooshin’s smug face drew out a giggle from the other. “A nerd can be cool too,” Jinhee said.

Out of nowhere, a hand came yanking Wooshin back by the shoulder and sent a hard blow to his face, causing him to stumble and crash onto the ground. Jinhee gasped in utter shock.

“What the hell?!” She rushed to help Wooshin get back on his feet. His lip was bleeding. Jinhee hugged his waist protectively and glared at the stranger who had just attacked him. “Who the hell are you? What do you want??”

Standing before them was a big boy around their age, wearing a grey uniform that clearly wasn’t from their school. His fists were clenched and his face was full of rage.

“What do I want?? I want my freaking bike back!!” The boy charged forward, but before he could touch Wooshin again, Jinhee pushed the tall boy back by his chest with all her might.

“Are you a mad dog?? Put your fists down and talk like a man! Do you see us trying to run away?!” she yelled. Wooshin placed his hand on her shoulder to calm her down.

The unfamiliar boy was slightly shaking with outrage. “You want me to talk? Then let me talk. Your boyfriend is a freaking THIEF! He stole my bike AND I HAVE TO SPEND ALL MY POCKET MONEY ON TRANSPORT!! Give that bike back to me right now or I’ll break your neck, asshole.”

Jinhee looked at Wooshin in anticipation, hoping to hear that this stranger had mistaken him for someone else. But Wooshin’s long sigh confirmed her bad feeling.

“Why haven’t you let that slide? It’s been two months already. Fine, I’ll give it back. But not now,” Wooshin said nonchalantly.

“WHY NOT?!” The other irritated boy yelled.

“Because that bike is not here, dumbass. You think I carry it around in my pocket?” Wooshin rolled his eyes. “I’ll have to fetch it at home.”

“You want me to let you go and disappear again? Not a chance. Tell me where you live,” the other boy said.

Wooshin sighed. “Look. I’ll get that bike tonight and bring it to you, just pick a place to meet. Not anywhere too far away. If I don’t show up, come find me at school and beat me up all you want. You know where my school is now.”

The other boy narrowed his eyes in suspicion. “I don’t trust you. Give me your phone number.”

Feeling guilty to have Jinhee involved in the situation, Wooshin tried his best to settle things quickly with the boy so they could leave as soon as possible. After agreeing to meet outside a 24-hour fast food restaurant in half an hour, the big boy finally let them go.

“That bike was never yours all along?” Jinhee asked in disbelief as they continued their way to the bus stop. “Why… Why did you steal it, Wooshin?”

“Thought I could use it to get to your house faster and take you with me.” Wooshin rubbed his nape and pouted, sad and guilty.

“I can’t believe this.” Jinhee sighed. “How did he recognize you anyway?”

“His parents own a small restaurant and he always left his bike outside. I used to buy take-out food there often, so he knew me.” Wooshin looked sideways at the other cautiously. “…I’m sorry.”

Jinhee looked up at the other’s face, trying to read his expression. She reached out her hand, pausing for a second before gently wiping the blood stain off his lips with her thumb.

“It’s okay, at least you’re willing to give it back right away. I’m just glad we took that bike along when we sneaked into your uncle’s house.” She smiled. A great sense of relief washed over the boy.

They arrived at the bus stop and waited for their ride to come.

But then, something stole Wooshin’s whole attention altogether.

A very familiar metallic grey sedan was parked across the street, with a license plate number that he immediately recognized at first glance. The car’s headlights were blinding white, shooting through the dimly-lit street, flashing on just to catch the boy’s attention before they died down right away.

The man of his nightmares was sitting inside, watching him like a lurking lion aiming for its prey.

Wooshin felt his heart drop and suddenly jump into palpitations. He averted his face away and instinctively held Jinhee closer. The oblivious girl neither saw nor recognized the car.

“Hm? What’s wrong? You look nervous.” Jinhee looked up at the taller’s face, and found beads of sweat starting to seep out the pores of his skin.

Coming like a savior, their bus arrived and blocked the view. Wooshin took Jinhee’s hand and jumped into the bus. He let her take the only empty seat left, grabbed a handrail, and stood facing her. Through the windows, he could see the car start moving and tailing their bus.

“Wooshin.”

Wooshin tore his gaze off the windows and shot a nervous smile to Jinhee, who had taken his free hand into hers for a comforting squeeze.

“Is it about that boy?” She asked in concern.

“Don’t worry,” Wooshin said, “it’s nothing.”

All the way, Wooshin struggled to hide his anxiety and ignore the presence of the car that wouldn’t stop following them, even until the moment they arrived at home. It was parked three houses away across the street.

Without a word, Wooshin went in and took the bike that was parked near the front door.

Jinhee stopped him by the shoulder. “I’ll go with you.”

“No.” Wooshin objected immediately. “Go inside and rest, Jinny. We still have school tomorrow.”

Jinhee had a terrible feeling stirring in her guts. For some unknown reasons, she didn’t want him to go back outside.

“Can’t you ask that boy to meet tomorrow instead?” she asked.

“I’ve made a promise. If I break it, next time you won’t trust my promises too.” Wooshin forced a smile out.

“…Please be safe,” Jinhee said helplessly. “I don’t know why, but I have a bad feeling. Make sure you’ll be safe, I ask for nothing else.”

Looking around to make sure they were out of anyone’s sight, Wooshin stepped closer and encircled his arms around the girl, squeezing her in a firm hug. Jinhee’s delicate hand that was caressing his back lovingly tempted him to just get inside with her and never go back out there.

But he knew, soon or later, he’d face what he had to face.

“Whatever happens, remember that I always think about you.” He left a lingering kiss on Jinhee’s forehead, giving a soft pat on the top of her head before pulling away. “I’ll get going now.”

As Wooshin hopped onto the bike and pedaled into the night, Jinhee’s hand reached out just to grab the empty air. She remained standing outside even when the boy was out of sight.

“Wooshin…” She exhaled an anxious sigh. “Hurry and come back.”

Out of the corner of her eye, she saw a particular metallic grey sedan leave its parking spot across the street, in front of her neighbor’s house, and head to the same direction as where Wooshin had gone. She had noticed the car earlier, when it had just arrived at the same time as them, and now it was leaving again. She hadn’t seen that car before; all she knew was that her neighbor had a big white SUV car for the family of many kids. 

Jinhee felt her skin crawl. When she went inside her home, her family welcomed her with puzzled faces.

“Jinny, why are you alone? Where’s Wooshinie?” her mother asked.

“He’s… returning his bike to the owner,” Jinhee answered, somewhat absent-minded.

“He’s not the owner?” Junho asked.

“No.” Jinhee’s eyebrows creased as she sank in deep thoughts about the car.

“Ah… Poor boy, it’s already dark outside. Your dad could’ve taken him and the bike by his car,” said the worried mother. “Does he still have enough money? He can take a cab home if he wants. Where is he meeting the bike’s owner?”

Jinhee’s bad feeling only grew worse. As soon as she was back in her room, she fished out her phone and sent a message to Wooshin.

_“Have you met him? Please hurry up and go home, take whatever ride you find. Be careful on your way.”_

Meanwhile, Wooshin had just arrived at the meeting spot, outside a fast food restaurant. The bike’s owner had been waiting for him.

“I’ll let you off this time. But if I find you coming to steal again, I won’t hesitate to beat you up even in front of my parents’ customers,” the other boy warned before leaving with his bike.

Feeling the buzzing in his pocket, Wooshin took his phone out and read the new message from Jinhee.

However, before he could even reply, a rough big hand grabbed his shoulder from behind and made him flinch out of surprise.

“Get in the car and keep quiet if you don’t want your girlfriend in trouble.”

The unpleasingly familiar voice sent goosebumps all over Wooshin’s body. The grim reaper had come to take his soul. He closed his eyes and exhaled a helpless sigh before he was dragged by the collar, and then thrown into the front seat of a metallic grey sedan.

It was the only chance he had to reply Jinhee’s message.

_“I can’t come home tonight. I’m sorry. Don’t worry about me… I love you…”_

The phone was snatched from his hands right after the message had been sent.

“Father—”

“Quiet!”

The enraged man behind the steering wheel shoved the phone into his own pocket. He could barely drive straight due to how infuriated he was. He smashed his hand onto the steering wheel.

“You little bastard! You think you could run away after I’ve raised your ungrateful ass?! You’ve messed up my life, I’ll make you pay for that!!”

_I’ve never asked for this._

Tears streamed down Wooshin’s face.

_I’m sorry, Jinny…_

Horror filled the teenage boy’s head as he was dragged into the house that he used to call home; familiar, yet cold and unwelcoming all at once. He stumbled multiple times on the stairs until his uncle tossed him into his room. His messy, untouched room.

Sprawled on the floor, Wooshin dragged himself backward in panic as his uncle slammed the door and stepped closer to him, his hands unbuckling his own belt, sliding it out the loops of his waistband. The bad memories that came rushing in all over again killed every bit of strength and courage left in the terrified boy.

“F-Father, please, don’t…”

The uncle held his belt in his clenched fist.

“From now on, you’re going to be silent about this and STAY AWAY from that girl. If anyone knows, not only will I finish you, but that girl and her family will also face the consequences. DO YOU UNDERSTAND?!”

Wooshin flinched and burst into tears. He answered with a feverish nod.

“NOW TAKE THOSE PANTS OFF AND BEND OVER!!”

* * *

“Dad, please… Can’t we check his uncle’s house first?”

Jinhee was sitting in the back seat of her father’s car, grasping the back of the driver seat. She and her brother in the front seat begged their father through their swollen puppy eyes. It was still early in the morning, both were dressed neatly in their uniforms, yet their wearied faces clearly indicated that they hadn’t slept a wink.

The father rubbed his tired face and sighed. He wasn’t less anxious than the kids. “We’ve discussed about this last night… Like I said, we can’t come and barge in even if we want to. Believe me, I want to. But his uncle is technically his legal, blood-related guardian while we are not his true family. As outsiders, we don’t have rights either to claim him back or interfere with his family matter, not to mention make a report to the police if we have no proofs on hand. Currently we are still not sure what has happened to him, we can’t tell if his uncle has actually done something to him. So, what can we do now? Well, you can go to school and see if he comes today, and we’ll know what to do after that.”

The siblings gave no more objections and remained silent throughout the ride to school.

They arrived quite early; when Jinhee entered the class, she found it half empty. Yeonwoo and Hangyul hadn’t arrived, but Seungyoun had. After dropping his stuff in his class, Junho decided to join his sister waiting in her classroom.

“I’ve tried calling and texting him too, like, maybe hundreds of times.” Seungyoun sat on his desk with his head hung low, swinging his long legs back and forth. He could barely look at the emotional mess on Jinhee’s face without feeling like breaking down. “I really hope he will come.”

And his wish was granted right away.

They turned their heads slowly to the boy who had just walked through the door; his chin was almost sticking to his chest, hiding his face behind his round glasses. His knuckles were turning white from how hard he was clutching his backpack straps, and his teeth were digging into his lower lip as he walked in a slow, peculiar manner, flinching in pain every few steps. When he arrived at his desk, he pulled the back of his pants up carefully to make extra room for his lower area, gripped the sides of his seat, and slowly bent his knees to place his weight onto the wooden chair. His swollen eyes closed and his pale face crumpled in pain upon the contact with the hard surface.

“Wooseok?” Jinhee squeaked.

“…W-Wooshin.”

Jinhee burst into tears. She took the wounded boy into a tender hug, and threaded her fingers through his disheveled hair, holding his head close to her chest. The wound on his lip from the angry bike owner was still there, but Jinhee didn’t remember seeing the other bruises on his face last night.

“He did it again, didn’t he? I shouldn’t have let you go alone. I’m—I’m so sorry.” She stood up all of a sudden and looked at her brother. “Let’s call Dad. We have a strong proof now, we can make a report to the police.”

“No.” Wooshin caught Jinhee’s wrist in a firm grip, just to hesitantly let it go right away. He dropped his heavy head. “Don’t.”

“Why??” Sobbing, the frustrated girl sat back down and squeezed the other’s hands, urging him to look at her in her teary eyes. “Why are you letting this happen? Why did you give in so easily?? What did he say to you??”

Wooshin snatched his hands back and shot a cold glare.

“…I have some stuff left at your place. I’d like to get them back.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's going to hurt from now on. We're going down! :> the next chapters will be kind of depressing, but some interesting stuff will happen. Expect to see Seungyoun more often in the coming chapters! Gotta give Seungseok their moments even in a straight story lmao anyways thank you for reading!
> 
> P.S.: I'm writing a chaotic Seungseok story, may post it here soon or later. ;D


	16. Chapter 16

* * *

It was the tenth night Jinhee slept in the guest room. The bittersweet memories held in that place felt like a bad stinging wound to her, yet she couldn’t help but wallow in her longing.

Lying alone in the dark, she curled and hugged a pillow close to her chest, burying her face into it. It agonized her how the familiar, soothing scent left on it had faded so fast, slapping the hard fact to her face that he had really left with all his traces – except for those that he couldn’t snatch back from her. The two fox plushies, Woo and Eevee. They were the only ones who had been her company at night.

Jinhee’s gaze was blank on the plushies.

“Why… Why did you say you loved me, and pushed me away the next day?”

She put the pillow aside and replaced it with Woo the fox, wondering if he could be holding his own fox too – Yeo, the female one – at the moment. For the umpteenth time, she unlocked her phone, opened her gallery, and scrolled through the bunch of pictures she had taken together with him. There were also many pictures of him that she had taken in secret. Initially, she had taken them for report purposes, to show the boy what his alters had been up to. But the latest pictures had been taken solely because she just _loved_ to.

Jinhee had realized that she had become that lovestruck teenage girl who couldn’t stop staring at her crush’s photos – except that she was now a broken-hearted, lovestruck teenage girl.

Jinhee couldn’t keep it in. She opened a particular chat room that was full of her own messages. The number had probably exceeded five hundred from the past ten days. None of them had been read by the receiver.

Sighing and brimming with tears, she added two more messages into the pile.

_“I miss you, I’m dying right now… No kidding.”_

_“I wish that first ‘I love you’ wouldn’t be the last too.”_

Jinhee let out another sigh, somewhat disgusted by how sappy she she sounded. She was about to delete that last message, and yet she thought, _He won’t read it anyway._

She sent another one instead.

_“Whenever you’re sad or in pain, just hug your little fox. I also do that. Maybe that way we can share a hug.”_

Jinhee put her phone away on the nightstand, planted a kiss on Woo’s head, and eventually fell asleep cuddling the fox.

Totally the opposite to what she expected, her new messages had been read – through the notifications. Just five-minute walk away from her place, in a house that had fallen awfully silent and dark, Wooseok was holding his phone in his frail, trembling hands. Earlier, his dear alter Wooshin had gone into a sudden uncontrollable outburst of rage that had knocked his uncle out, which had helped him steal his phone back. He knew he was going to be in a terribly big, _big_ trouble the next day, but it was all definitely worth it to him.

Wooseok curled under his blanket and hugged his fox. His lower body was aching. Soft mewls were slipping out between his quiet sobs. Quivering, he wiped his teary eyes with the back of his weak hand and held his phone to his chest.

“I miss you… I _miss_ you…”

He was too afraid to open those messages. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to; he was holding onto every string of his self control in order not to open the chat and pour everything out.

No, Wooseok didn’t want the girl he loved to get hurt by his evil uncle too.

His puffy eyes fluttered closed and his ears flushed red as he summoned a particular scene from his memory; when Jinhee had kissed him on the lips. It had lasted way too short for his liking, compared to Wooshin’s kiss that he did not even have memory of. He wanted, _needed_ more.

Desperate and ashamed, the blushing teen planted a deep, lingering kiss on his fox’s mouth. A fresh tear slipped down his pale cheek.

“I love you…”

* * *

Summer break was just one month away. There had been whispers among the sophomores about the school’s much awaited annual school trip, and that day, it was finally confirmed by the homeroom teachers.

“We are going on a four-day, three-night island trip to get closer to nature,” the male teacher announced. “This trip is not just for refreshing purposes, but we will also use this as a chance to let nature inspire you, to stimulate your creativity and artistic side. Therefore, after returning, each you will have to create a piece of art based on the inspiration you find on this trip, and submit it once summer break ends.”

Some faint groans could be heard here and there.

“It’s not a _break_ if we have homework to do,” Hangyul muttered at the back.

“But this time, you are free to create any form of art you want. It can be a painting, a song, a piece of literature like a poetry or a story, a dance performance, or even a drama script, performances either solo or group. Whatever you can imagine, it doesn’t have to match your field of art. Since it’s a homework for your break, we won’t limit you in expressing your creativity. The teachers will collectively check all submitted pieces. If your works really impress us, we will include them in our annual art exhibition in December. As you know, many people, including some well-known artists, always come to our exhibition.”

The previously dejected sounds turned into excited whispers among the students.

“I’ve got to make a masterpiece!” Seungyoun whispered loudly. “Should I write a song instead? About the woods maybe? From the previous exhibitions, if it’s performing art, we may get a chance to perform at the exhibition!”

“Oh, you should! You’re so good at writing songs,” Yeonwoo said, “people are missing out so much because they haven’t heard your songs. You’re good at drawing, but you can try something different this time!”

“Then, a song it is!” Seungyoun beamed, happy and giddy to get his girlfriend’s approval and compliments. “Oh, you can sing well, though! Should we perform together?”

“We can?” Yeonwoo gasped. “I’d love to! Gosh, it’s going to be so fun!”

Having stayed in mute mode throughout the class, Jinhee side-eyed her chairmate. He was zoning out, seeming to be so deep in his thoughts. If he was thinking about what kind of art he would create, Jinhee knew there was already a mesmerizing art exhibition of his own inside his head, beautiful colors of nature splashed in his imagination. He might make it into the annual exhibition.

_Wooseok… What do you have in mind?_

Jinhee sighed. She wished she could ask that and share ideas with Wooseok, like Seungyoun and Yeonwoo did, but he always, _always_ refused to talk.

Jinhee used her break time to get away from people and find some peace, and maybe some inspiration too while she was at it. She opted to go to the old art room, where collections of their alumni’s old works were stored. Actually, there was a bigger art room that kept the newer works, and most students chose to go there if they needed to be inspired. However, Jinhee just didn’t feel like admiring some art together with others at the moment.

Unfortunately, she found the room locked when she got there. And yet, by chance, a female janitor passed by.

“Excuse me, Ma’am, do you have the key to this room? May I get in?” Jinhee asked.

The lady looked at her in surprise. “You want to go in there? Of course you can. People haven’t visited this room since the ghost rumor started last week, so this room is locked now, since no one comes anymore.”

“G-Ghost rumor?” Jinhee hadn’t heard of it; she had probably been too busy in her own emotional wreck to pay attention to such thing.

“Yes! A ghost was spotted in there. Two students and a teacher saw it when they opened the door, but they got scared and left immediately,” the janitor said, with an exaggerated expression that Jinhee found quite funny.

In a normal condition, she would get scared and choose to leave. It wasn’t really a normal condition to her, though, and she was in need of alone time, so she thought, _Screw it. If the ghost wants to admire some art alone, maybe we can relate to each other._

So, she ended up enjoying her peaceful time in that room all by herself. No ghosts were seen until she left.

Meanwhile, on the other side of the school building, Seungyoun and Yohan had stopped Wooseok in his track.

“Hi, Wooseokie! Can we talk for a moment?” Seungyoun asked in a bright, super friendly tone that sounded like he was approaching a little child. Yeonwoo was away digging some information about the trip and the exhibition from her brother, the student council president, so Seungyoun made use of the free time to try his luck with Wooseok again. He had run into Yohan on his way, who had wished to come along.

Wooseok bowed his head and fidgeted with his fingers. He gave no answers and attempted to walk past the two taller boys, yet Yohan blocked his way easily with his body.

“Wooseok, we haven’t talked for a while,” Yohan said, looking somewhat frustrated with the smaller boy. “Why are you avoiding me too? I thought we had become close friends.”

“I-I’m sorry.” Wooseok took a step back. “Please… leave me alone.”

Seungyoun’s face crumpled as he struggled not to break down. “Wooseokie, please don’t do this. I miss you.”

“ _We_ all miss you,” Yohan corrected, “especially Jinhee. You know, I was already trying to accept the fact that she had chosen you over me. We don’t know what really happened to you, but… shouldn’t you at least open up to her?”

Being trapped, Wooseok could feel Wooshin’s existence push to the surface, trying to take over. Ever since he and his alters had started to open up to each other, their internal communication had slowly been established, but it was his return to the stressful traumatic environment that had forced his system to work together and survive. His ability to share co-consciousness with Wooshin had also been developed – at times, he could faintly hear Wooshin in his head as they both were present and conscious at the same time.

“…That’s right, you don’t know what happened, so don’t tell me what to do.”

Wooseok’s eyes rounded in shock and his hand flew to his mouth as soon as he realized what he had just blurted out under Wooshin’s influence. Yohan and Seungyoun were equally taken aback.

“I-I-I’m sorry, I don’t know w-why I said that—”

Wooseok turned on his heels and ran away.

“Wooseok, wait!” Seungyoun ran after Wooseok as his first instinctive response. The latter hadn’t gone farther than several big steps away before Seungyoun managed to capture him in his arms.

Wooseok’s reaction was far beyond their expectation.

“NO!! Let go of me!! Don’t touch me!!” He screamed his head off and writhed violently in Seungyoun’s firm embrace. The sight of his tears made Seungyoun burst out crying along, and Yohan was left dumbfounded in the heat of the moment.

“Wooseok, please, I’m your friend! I’m not _him!_ I’m not your uncle!” Seungyoun cried.

Wooseok’s fear made way for Wooshin to take a brief control over his body; he stepped hard on Seungyoun’s foot, turned around in a swift move, and jabbed his knee to the bigger boy’s crotch, sending him down to the floor. Seungyoun curled and cried out in pain as Wooseok ran away as fast as he could.

“Seungyoun! Are you okay??” Yohan tried to help by patting and rubbing the other’s lower back, which didn’t really help much. “Look… I think we need to give him more time.”

Seungyoun sat up and they helplessly watched Wooseok leave their sight.

“I just… want to help.” Seungyoun dropped his head and cried.

* * *

Wooseok was missing. His seat had been empty since break time that day. Jinhee, Seungyoun, Yeonwoo, and Hangyul sent anxious and puzzled looks to each other throughout the classes.

Jinhee’s phone screen lit up under her desk. She made sure the teacher wasn’t looking before sneakily checking the new notification. It was a message from Junho.

_“Noona, why is Wooseok hyung wandering around outside? I went to the toilet earlier and ran into him, but he looked at me like he didn’t know me and walked away. Did something happen?”_

The message sent chills down Jinhee’s spine. _Why do I have a bad feeling about this?_ She thought.

_“Where was he heading to?”_ she replied.

Junho’s reply came in a minute. _“I’m not sure, but from his direction, I think it was either the music room or the old art room.”_

Jinhee thought, _It could be the old art room. The door may be still unlocked, since I went there earlier._

She took a screenshot of her chat with her brother and sent it to her group chat with her sophomore friends; Seungyoun, Yeonwoo, Hangyul, and Yohan. They were quick to open the chat. None of them were focusing on the class, apparently.

_Seungyoun: “Like he didn’t know Junho? Could it be??”_

_Hangyul: “Isn’t that how he’s been acting lately? Sounds normal to me.”_

_Yohan: “But he doesn’t usually skip classes, does he?”_

_Seungyoun: “He doesn’t! Even Wooshin doesn’t do that anymore. There must be something wrong… It must be my fault. :(”_

_Yohan: “Stop beating yourself up, it really was unexpected.”_

_Yeonwoo: “What did you guys do this time?”_

_Jinhee: “Why is it your fault?”_

_Seungyoun: “I just tried to talk to him… and maybe stepped into his personal space and made him angry and cry and run away. I’M SORRY :’(“_

_Hangyul: “I left you out of my watch for a second and you made a child cry.”_

_Seungyoun: “I really didn’t mean it!! :’’’(“_

_Hangyul: “You’re a meanie.”_

_Yeonwoo: “Stop it, Gyul, Seungyounie is crying for real. He’ll apologize later. Right, babe?”_

_Seungyoun: “I will apologize with all my heart!_ _ㅠㅠ”_

_Jinhee: “We should go and find him right after this last class ends. There are still fifteen minutes left, we gotta hurry before he leaves.”_

_Yohan: “Guys, my class have just returned from the auditorium. I checked the music room on my way. He was there, playing the piano alone.”_

_Jinhee: “Piano? He can? But how… I thought he didn’t play any musical instruments.”_

_Yohan: “He’s really good, though. I was shocked.”_

_Hangyul: “Aw, Jinhee is sad because her booboo didn’t tell her he could play the piano.”_

_Yeonwoo: “^ You’re digging your own grave, man.”_

_Jinhee: “I’m not sad! >:( Just surprised.”_

The bell soon rang, and five of them were quick to leave once their classes were dismissed. Jinhee packed Wooseok’s stuff up and brought his backpack with her. Luckily, the group arrived at the music room right when Wooseok was walking out the door.

“Wooseok, I’m sorry!” Seungyoun dropped to his knees and grabbed Wooseok’s skinny ankles. “I’m really sorry!”

A sharp gasp jumped out of Wooseok’s mouth and his eyes rounded at the other boy. “Oh my God. Why is this handsome boy apologizing to me?”

Jaws slacked, the group of sophomores looked at each other in horror. The voice they heard was _different_ ; it was softer and the pitch was higher than usual. It definitely wasn’t Woo’s voice – instead of a child, it sounded more like a _girl,_ with a hint of cheekiness in it _._ His coy body language further supported the horrible thought in their heads.

Yeonwoo tore her gaze off the girly boy and slowly turned to Jinhee, whispering, “New personality…?”

Jinhee looked like her soul had just flown out her body.

Still kneeling on the floor, Seungyoun flicked his head up and gaped at the adorable confused face looking back at him. “Did you just… call me handsome? Ah nevermind, I’m sorry, I think something got into my ear.” He stuck his little finger into his ear.

Wooseok tapped his puckered lips with his index finger and blinked at Seungyoun, seeming to be thinking of what to do with the boy.

Catching everyone off guard, he giggled. “It’s true, you’re quite handsome. What’s your name?” He flashed a fond smile.

Seungyoun stood up slowly and looked at the shorter boy in disbelief. It didn’t take long until his eyes were brimming with tears. “You… don’t remember me?”

“Oh?” Wooseok’s eyebrows arched in surprise. “Why are there tears in your eyes? I don’t know who you are. Are you… supposed to be my boyfriend?”

Hangyul’s laugh exploded, causing the rest of the group to flinch out of shock.

“Hey!! He’s MY boyfriend!” Yeonwoo barked. “Back off, girlie! You don’t wanna catch these fists!”

Jinhee caught her best friend and pushed her back to her previous position. “Yeonwoo, wait! We don’t know who we’re facing right now,” she whispered loudly, “we’ve got to be careful!”

Seungyoun panicked and turned his head back and forth between his fuming girlfriend and the other unknown _girl_ inside Wooseok’s body. The poor big boy was acting like he had just gotten caught cheating.

“My, my.” Wooseok shook his head and clicked his tongue. “ _That_ is your girlfriend? She’s quite the wild type, isn’t she?”

“I DON’T like you.” Yeonwoo growled. “Bad first impression, girlie. _Bad._ ”

“She’s the good kind of wild—” Seungyoun stopped his mouth with his hand. “I mean, yes, she’s my girlfriend.”

“Hey.” Jinhee called. Wooseok’s attention was shifted to her – it made a part of her jump with joy, because in the past three weeks, for once he finally showed a response to her. “Who… are you?”

Wooseok’s face brightened up altogether. “Ah, I’m Kim Doyeon. I’m seventeen years old. Nice to meet you!” He bowed enthusiastically.

Jinhee’s heart slumped to her stomach. _His new personality… Is it the memory of his first love? Son Doyeon?_

A fragment of his memory had grown into its own character. Kim Wooseok was then a person of five dissociated personalities.

“This is a bit awkward, isn’t it? It looks like you guys know me, but I don’t know you. I don’t know what you want from me… I’ll just say this. If you’re nice to me, I’ll be nice to you. If you’re mean to me, I’ll cry, and then I’ll also be mean to you.” In a defensive manner, Wooseok – or Doyeon – shot a sweet smile at the group, who were starting to come closer ever so cautiously.

“I’ll be nice to you!” Seungyoun raised his hand. “This is my only chance to be close friends with you, so I’ll be the nicest!”

“Cho Seungyoun.” The girly Wooseok read the nametag on Seungyoun’s blazer, and let out a giggle once again. “I like you already.”

Since the new alter didn’t show any signs of being dangerous or overly emotional, apart from being a little defensive and self-protective in her first social interaction, the group loosened up and decided to introduce themselves to her. She seemed delighted to be surrounded by people who wanted to get to know her. From the things Jinhee had learned about DID, she supposed Kim Doyeon was the kind of alter that they called _Apparently Normal Part_ or ANP, not an _Emotional Part_ that held onto the past trauma, like Shin and Woo.

“Hi, Doyeon.” Jinhee forced out a smile. “I’m Cha Jinhee. Let’s… spend a lot of time together!”

The soft smiling eyes that were looking back at her seemed both familiar and foreign at the same time. They held a playful glint, but something in them gave off a blue feeling. Jinhee wasn’t sure if it was just her feeling.

“I’m so glad to finally have friends,” Doyeon said. “You guys aren’t going to bully me, right? Those are some manly big bodies you have.” She pointed at Seungyoun, Hangyul, and Yohan.

“No, no, of course not!” the group shook their heads and waved their hands frantically.

“Except if you steal my boyfriend,” Yeonwoo mumbled.

“Tsk. Okay, he’s yours.” Doyeon rolled her eyes. “How about… the other boys?”

The group turned their heads around and found their juniors – Junho, Hyeongjun, and Eunsang – coming and stopping behind Yohan and Hangyul.

“Oh, you guys have found him!” Junho perked up.

“He’s cute. Who is he?” Doyeon whispered to Jinhee. “Oh wait, his smile kinda looks like yours.”

“He’s my brother,” Jinhee chuckled. “Please don’t try to hit on him. He’s a baby.” Being naturally mischievous at heart, she pointed at Yohan and Hangyul, whose eyes then widened like a pair of deer caught in the headlights. “How about those two?”

“N-No!” Yohan shook his head. “Jinhee, don’t do that.”

Doyeon tapped her chin and cocked her head. “Hangyul looks like a yaoi boy in those adult Japanese comics. Too big and muscular. I don’t like. Kim Yohan… Hmm. He’s not bad.”

Jinhee burst into laughter. She wasn’t even aware that it was the first time she could laugh again in the past three weeks.

“Hey, you’re also not my type,” Hangyul pointed at the girl inside Wooseok’s body, irritated and offended. “Geez, you must be a pervert. Calling me a yaoi boy. You read that _stuff_? Gross mind, ew. Maybe a little sexy. But gross.” He trailed off into incoherent mumbles.

“What are you waiting for? Go get him!” Jinhee pushed Doyeon towards Yohan. The group guffawed as Yohan let out a loud broken shriek when their bodies collided.

“Ow, oh my gosh, this is so embarrassing.” Doyeon pulled back and covered her flat chest with her arms. She turned back and pretended to be mad at Jinhee. “I wasn’t ready yet! Hmph!” She stomped her foot. When she turned back to Yohan, though, a sheepish smile was already on her lips. “Hi there.”

Yohan answered in fear, raising his stiff hand just a little. “H-Hi.”

Needless to say, their first encounter with Wooseok’s new alter was chaotic and full of shrieks.

Once the others had gone home, Jinhee asked Doyeon to go with her to the dessert shop and talk over some ice cream.

“Doyeon, what flavor do you like?” Jinhee asked.

“I like chocolate.” Doyeon smiled. She had Wooseok’s smile at times; a little held back, but genuine. “Do you like chocolate too?”

A sad smile found its way to Jinhee’s lips. “I like chocolate the most.”

“Oh! You can be my bestie!” Doyeon laughed.

_How I missed that laugh._ Jinhee exhaled a quiet sigh.

They picked a table for two, and proceeded to eat in silence. The longer Jinhee stared at her chocolate ice cream that she barely touched, the harder it was for her to suppress her emotions. Earlier that day, she wouldn’t have imagined sitting face to face with the boy she had missed terrribly, eating some ice cream together. The person in front of her looked just like the normal Wooseok when that mouth was busy eating and no words were said.

Jinhee couldn’t stop herself from reaching out for the other’s hand and holding it in hers.

“Hm?” Doyeon stuck her light blue spoon in her mouth and raised an eyebrow, waiting for what the other had to say.

“D-Doyeon.” Jinhee bowed her head and bit her lip. Too many words were pushing each other in her mouth, fighting for their turn to jump out first.

Doyeon pulled her spoon out with a popping sound of her lips. “What’s wrong? Your ice cream will melt if you don’t eat it.”

“It’s…” Jinhee sighed, giving up. She decided it was best to just swallow all those words back down. “Nevermind. How does it feel? To be... alive?”

Doyeon seemed puzzled by the question. Not too long, though, as she was quick to figure out. “Ah, you mean to be fronting? You must think this is my first time coming out. It is _not_ my first time.”

Jinhee gasped. “You’re not… new?”

“I’m new, and I’m _so_ confused. Especially because of these boys trying to talk to me in here.” Doyeon tapped her head and shrugged. She showed three of her fingers. “I’ve come out three times before, all at the same place that is supposed to be my home, where I live with an angry man. The boys call him uncle. I’ve only seen him once, though. That time, it was night and he had just come home. I heard doors being slammed downstairs, and I thought, ‘What are all those noises about?’ so I creeped out the room and peeked from the stairs. That man was so angry, when he got a phone call, he screamed on the phone like there was no tomorrow. Because I was scared and confused, I decided to go back and just sleep.

Second time, the house was empty. I just spent time staring at the empty pool there. Things were really confusing… I just tried to listen to the voice in my head. Wooshin. That guy told me some weird complicated things that didn’t really make sense to me, but I guess he was serious about all that he said. He also warned me not to cause troubles. What troubles, though? I didn’t even know what to do. I just felt like playing the piano but couldn’t find one around. I was too scared to get out of the house too. Third time, I woke up on my desk with a paper sticking on my face.”

Suddenly Doyeon gasped and looked at Jinhee with wide eyes as the realization dawned on her. Jinhee couldn’t help but feel nervous, being stared at intently by those beautiful doe eyes.

Doyeon clicked her fingers and pointed at Jinhee. “I knew it. That’s why you seem familiar. You’re the girl in that drawing!”

Jinhee quivered a little, feeling the hair on the back of her neck bristle. “W-What drawing?”

“The drawing that was sticking on my face when I woke up!” A beautiful, full bloom smile spread on Doyeon’s face. “That drawing was so cool, but it got wet. How sad. I thought it could be my drool, but it was stuck near my eye and I thought maybe it was… tears? I don’t know why there would be tears there. Anyways, were you already a close friend?”

Jinhee ducked her head to hide her watery eyes. “Yeah… Y-You can say so.” _He drew me and cried… I thought… I thought he had stopped caring about me._ Jinhee blinked back her tears. “When did that happen?”

Doyeon tapped her lips with her spoon. “Hmm… It feels like just recently. Don’t believe me, though, I don’t even know what day, month, year it is today. But it really doesn’t feel like it happened _looong_ ago.”

In the deepest of Jinhee’s memory, Wooshin’s voice whispered the words he had said that night, when he had hugged her for the last time before leaving her.

_“Whatever happens, remember that I always think about you.”_

A bead of tear escaped the tail of Jinhee’s eye. She wiped it away angrily, upset with herself for failing to keep it in.

“…Why are you crying?” Doyeon asked in concern. “Did I say something wrong?”

“No.” Jinhee shook her head and smiled. “It’s nothing.”

“It can’t be nothing. But it looks like you don’t wanna talk about it. What can I do?” Doyeon shrugged again. “Let’s change topic then. You know what, I can’t believe I don’t have a phone. Even babies have their own phones these days! Look over there, that baby is playing a poop game on the phone.”

Jinhee was surprised. “You don’t?”

“I don’t! I’ve searched the whole house before, there were no mobile phones.” Doyeon let out an exasperated sigh. “How am I going to read comics online on my way home?”

It was very late, but it finally clicked in Jinhee’s head. _So that’s probably why he’s never opened my texts since that night… Because he doesn’t even have his phone with him! His uncle must’ve confiscated his phone. That means… his uncle might know what was going on between him and me. Gosh, why didn’t I think of this much sooner?? He must’ve been punished for it! Otherwise… he wouldn’t have pushed me away._

“You look really troubled, you know. Seems like you have a lot to bear in life.” Doyeon sighed. “Come, let me give you a hug.”

Done with her ice cream, Doyeon moved her seat next to Jinhee and pulled her by the waist into a nice snuggly hug. Jinhee’s breath was caught in her throat as the other gave some light pats on her back.

“Does this make you feel better?”

Jinhee’s tensed body eventually relaxed as she wrapped her arms around the other’s waist, and buried her face on the shoulder, deeply inhaling the soft, baby-like scent that she missed so much. Even though it wasn’t _him_ who was hugging her, even though it was just his body, she found a bit of relief in that short moment.

_Please make this last forever…_ “Doyeon, please stay… Can you?”

Doyeon bit her lip, contemplating. “I can’t do whatever I want. You know, because I’m not alone in here… I guess? There are others, and this Wooshin guy who sounds like a control freak. But if I could, I definitely would. You’re a nice friend.”

Doyeon pulled away, and Jinhee whimpered at the loss of contact. “I don’t understand this feeling,” Doyeon said, “it feels like something is telling me not to be too close to you. I’m sure it’s one of these boys here.” She pointed at her head. “Although I’ve _heard_ Wooshin talk to me a few times, I don’t know him and the other voices well enough to recognize them. So! For now, I’m going to ignore them and have fun with you! Do you have a phone?”

“H-huh? Y-Yes, I have.” Jinhee didn’t have time to worry about Wooseok or Wooshin not allowing Doyeon to be close to her, because the female alter then snatched her phone and proceeded to take a bunch of selfies of them together. She even slung her arm around Jinhee’s shoulders and leaned her head on hers, making various cheeky faces with winks and duck lips. Jinhee’s smile in the photos gradually grew bigger and bigger until she was laughing at the other’s funny expressions in those selfies.

“Now, I’m going to imitate Kim Yohan. AHAHAHEEHEEHEE!” Doyeon took a video of herself laughing Yohan’s high-pitched dolphin laugh, with Jinhee guffawing and clapping her hands so happily in the background. They managed to earn attention from the whole shop.

Wooseok’s calm and composed image had successfully been ruined by his one and only precious female alter.

Meanwhile, at the counter, the owner’s son was watching them with great curiosity.

“Hmm.” Minhee rubbed his chin. “So, the stalker is now the boyfriend? Interesting. I thought Yohan hyung would be the boyfriend. But he laughed like Yohan hyung just now. Hmm. Interesting.”

“Doyeon, where are you going tonight?” Jinhee asked. Her mood was much brighter then, thanks to Kim Doyeon.

_She’s really fun,_ Jinhee thought. _She didn’t come across as a funny person, her first impression wasn’t this good. But if the real Doyeon was like this too, I can see why she was Wooseok’s first love._

“I’m not sure,” Doyeon thought out loud, “I feel like going to the bookstore and buying some comics. But I also feel like I should go somewhere important.”

“Home?” Jinhee suggested carefully. “Should we go home together? Do you… want to have a sleepover?”

“That sounds good.” Doyeon grinned. “A voice in my head is shouting a big ‘NO’ right now, but I’ll ignore it. What do these boys know anyway? Let’s go!”

Doyeon grabbed Jinhee’s wrist, and memories instantly flooded Jinhee’s mind, reminding her of how Wooshin had always held her wrist as if she had been his possession. She let the feeling sink in and cherished it as a moment that might not happen again soon or later.

“I know, you must be lonely.” Doyeon swung Jinhee’s hand back and forth as they walked together down the sidewalk. “I feel it too. All the time. It’s uncomfortable, you know? Whenever I want to be happy, I’m always reminded of that feeling. It’s like… I’m craving for something. It’s embarrassing to say it out loud, but I think it could be love. Or affection. I’ve started to think that maybe I exist just to feel that craving.”

The helpless tone in that frail voice tugged at Jinhee’s heartstrings, sending a suffocating feeling to her chest. She stopped walking and turned facing the other.

Under the warm yellow light of the lamppost above their heads, the complexion of the boy’s handsome face was way too enchanting in her sight. His alluring doe eyes held such deep curiosity, yet there was a familiar glint in them that gradually changed the longer they gazed at her, reflecting those that Jinhee could recognize well; from Wooseok’s innocence, to Wooshin’s passion and thirst.

“Don’t leave me.” Jinhee hugged the other’s body that had stiffened up. “Please. I miss you so much. Please let me in.”

A pair of hands held her shoulders and slowly peeled her off, breaking the hug. Fresh tears rolled down her cheeks upon the sight of the cold face that she had grown sick of seeing every day.

“Please pretend this day never happened.”

The deep voice cut through Jinhee’s heart like a sharp piece of ice. She collapsed onto her knees and burst into tears, as the boy turned his back to her and ran away into the night.

“Come back!!!”

She was drowning too deep in her own despair that she failed to notice a particular car across the street, silently leaving into the dark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Girly Wooseokie has joined the chat lmao his system was getting more screwed up because he had to go back to his abusive uncle, and just like Kim Doyeon, there may be more new alters broken off in order to help Wooseok's system survive. What kind of alters? Just keep reading :D
> 
> Self-promotion: I've just posted a new Seungseok story called "Who's a Good Boy?" in which Seungyoun turns into a Shiba Inu and becomes Wooseok's pet haha pls check it out if you'd like, thank you!


	17. Chapter 17

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If anyone waited for this update, I'm sorry for taking forever to update, it's because of some changes in rl but mainly because I have a pet now and I kinda got myself stuck on Animal Crossing lmao anyways, I promised myself that I would update today, because this day, this important day, is KIM WOOSEOK'S SOLO DEBUT DAY WOOHOO he's so RUDE in the Red Moon MV I'm WHIPPED D': I uploaded this 40 mins before his debut broadcast lol let's give Wooseokie lots of love and support! And enjoy this story!

* * *

The very much awaited summer trip for the sophomores had finally come. Everyone couldn’t be more excited to leave the sickening routine of spending long days being caged inside their school building; it was time to have some fun in the sun.

“Wow, you guys look like much happier people when you’re not in school uniforms,” Hangyul commented as he made his way through the aisle of their bus, followed by the smiley and giggly Yohan. Everyone was dressed in uniform trip t-shirts, paired with casual jeans. Their shirts had three versions with three different colors according to their buses and their groups – there were light blue, pastel yellow, and soft pink. This particular bus of two groups got the pink ones.

“But I gotta say this shirt gives a minus point to my dignity as a man. Who came up with the idea to use this color?” Hangyul was clearly unsatisfied with his pretty shirt.

“Pink is a manly color!” Seungyoun yelled as soon as he popped into the bus. The three boys went straight to the back and claimed the very last row, which consisted of five seats, leaving only two of them unoccupied.

“Cha Jinhee and Han Yeonwoo, please come to the back and fill the empty seats!” Hangyul said as soon as the girls came in.

“Oh man, we won’t be able to sleep if we sit there.” Jinhee sighed.

“Why would you sleep and miss all the fun? Sleep is for the weak!” Yeonwoo cracked an evil laugh as she dragged her sleep-deprived friend towards her smiley boyfriend, who was beaming and waving his whole arms as if they hadn’t met since forever.

Jinhee blamed her nightmare. She had woken up in the middle of the night due to yet another dream of a particular boy, and hadn’t been able to sleep a wink until just an hour before her alarm had gone off. Letting out another sigh, she dropped all her weight into the seat by the window, and flew her empty gaze all the way to the front row. She rolled her eyes. Of course, the nerd was sitting with the teacher like a nice little pet Chihuahua.

It hadn’t even been ten minutes into the road trip when the bus was already full of cheerful and vibrant noises, with Seungyoun’s loud singing voice and Yohan’s dolphin laugh dominating everybody else. And it hadn’t even been fifteen minutes when Hangyul spilled a whole bag of chips onto the bus floor. Yeonwoo was laughing heartily and enjoying the time of her life, while Jinhee had long flown away into the dreamland, thanks to the help from the earphones stuffed in her ears. She had a mask covering her sleeping face – apparently she had learned well from past experiences of sleeping in a bus full of naughty kids.

The atmosphere was less vibrant once they moved onto the ferry that took them to the island of their destination. The motion sickness had managed to shut a good amount of mouths up, including Hangyul’s and Yohan’s. But of course it had to take more than that to beat Seungyoun and his endless noises.

“You ask me, why am I giggling on the sea? It’s because of the sea- _weed_!” Seungyoun chortled while chomping on some roasted seaweed snack. His girlfriend was doing just the same, eating and laughing all the way.

“Stop that before I barf on your face and feed you to the sharks,” Hangyul said with his eyes closed, his back straight and flat against his seat. Yohan, who had appeared to be asleep next to him, burst into a fit of giggles.

“The only shark here is me! I’m _sharxy_ and I know it.” Seungyoun laughed. He leaned comfortably facing the girl beside him and flashed a cheeky grin, showing off the pieces of seaweed stuck between his teeth. “Babe, your turn!” He put a piece of his snack into her open mouth.

Yeonwoo took the snack in and thought of another joke. “Hmm… What does a mermaid wear to the Maths class?”

“An algae-BRA!” Seungyoun exclaimed victoriously. Some stiffled laughter could be heard here and there.

“That’s not fair! How did you know the answer?” Yeonwoo laughed and gave a playful smack on her boyfriend’s arm.

“Because! _I’m the one at the sail, I’m the master of my sea, ooh~_!” Seungyoun sang a line from Imagine Dragon’s song, _Believer,_ and the couple ended up singing together in soft falsetto. Their harmonized vocals sounded so perfect together, it brought a smile to Jinhee’s lips, thus exposing herself to the pair.

“Ha! I knew she’s been awake the whole time.” Yeonwoo pointed at Jinhee’s face. “Come on, grandma, you’ve slept longer than Captain America.”

Jinhee snickered and her eyelids finally fluttered open. “Gosh… Let me live. I barely slept a wink last night.”

Naturally, her gaze flew all the way to the front, just like what had happened all the way whenever she opened her eyes. Having a seat by the aisle gave her the perfect angle to see that particular nerdy boy. From what it looked like, a teacher was trying to help him out with his seasickness. Jinhee couldn’t help but worry.

_It’s probably his first time on a ferry… I hope he’s okay._

Just shortly after, Wooseok dumped all the content of his stomach into a vomit bag. Jinhee gasped and sat up straight in her seat.

_Oh, poor you…_ She mentally whined.

Jinhee digged into the pocket of her jeans and fished out some of her sour lemon candies. _These should help,_ she thought.

She poked her male classmate sitting across the aisle. “Hey, could you please pass these to the front? The very front row, for Kim Wooseok.”

“Sure.” The boy shrugged, took the candies, and proceeded to pass them to the person in front of him until they reached their destination – Wooseok’s hand.

“W-Who are these from?” Wooseok asked the boy behind him, his round eyes blinking in surprise behind his glasses.

“No idea. They’re from the back. Can I have one? I’m about to die,” the boy said.

Wooseok kindly gave one of the four candies in his hand, and then craned his neck to see the back rows. Quickly Jinhee went back on pretending to be asleep. The next time she opened an eye for a peek, she found the teacher telling Wooseok to suck on the candy. So he did as he was told to – he popped the candy into his mouth and sucked on it.

A huge victorious smile bloomed on Jinhee’s face.

“Hey, Kim Wooseok! Those candies are from Cha Jinhee!” Yeonwoo yelled out of the blue, and Jinhee was so close to giving her a good smack on the back of her head, yet she muffled her big mouth instead. “ _Mmpfhmmmff_!”

Wooseok nearly choked on the candy. He couldn’t possibly spit it out, could he? Not under the teachers’ watch. His face and ears turned just as red as Jinhee’s, feeling all curious eyes fall on them.

“I’m so gonna feed you to the sharks,” Jinhee growled through her clenched teeth while her best friend cracked a satisfied laugh together with Seungyoun. The couple hit their palms together in a loud high five. Truly partners in crime.

Meanwhile, Wooseok had sunk into his seat, trying his best not to be seen by anyone at the back. His eyes grew hot at the sight of the two candies left in his hand. As he leaned his head back and closed his eyes, he rolled his tongue around the candy inside his mouth and sucked on it with all his heart, savoring the sour flavor like it was the best treat he had ever had in his life. His bony hand gripped the rest of the candies and discreetly slipped them into the pocket of his jeans.

He could finally _feel_ his heart beat again like it used to.

As soon as they arrived, they were divided into their predetermined groups, which each consisted of twenty eight students. There were two main destinations on the island, thus two places to stay at; a villa near the beach and a camping ground in the woods, three teams at each place that would exchange spots the next day. For the first night, the two pink groups got to stay at the villa together with one blue group. They gathered in the main hall for a short briefing before dropping their stuff in their rooms.

“Remember that there will be teachers watching over you, so try your best to stick to these rules,” a female teacher said. She held up a paper that was identical to those in the students’ hands. “You can see a number of rules in capital letters and bold font here, pay extra attention to them as you should. I can’t emphasize this point enough, you are NOT allowed to sneak into the rooms of your opposite gender! This is a school trip, NOT a honeymoon. You are here to blend with nature, NOT with your lovers.”

“Aww.” Seungyoun and Yeonwoo cooed dejectedly.

“She says that because she’s a spinster,” Hangyul mumbled, “expired virgin.”

While the teacher went on rambling about the rules, Jinhee found herself unable to stop stealing glances at Wooseok. For the first time in the past few hours, he was at the back instead of the front, standing all alone.

The next time she turned her head, their eyes met by accident – they flinched as if they had just gotten electrocuted by the eye contact. Both teenagers averted their gazes away from each other and fidgeted in their spots.

_Gosh, let me just die. Can’t I just… stop??_ Jinhee squeezed her eyes shut and mentally scolded herself.

Perhaps it was a good thing that she wasn’t in the same group as him, she thought. Wooseok was in Pink-A with Yeonwoo, Hangyul, and other twenty five students, while Jinhee was in Pink-B, the same team as Seungyoun and Yohan. That assignment was effective on the second day; when they moved to the woods, these groups were taking different routes even though they were at the same place. For the first day, though, the students were all split up according to the beach activities they had signed up for prior to the trip. Jinhee had picked the jet boat and banana boat – she had felt the need to scream her head off when she had marked those two fast-pace water sports in the trip form – while Wooseok’s choices were totally the opposite, the peaceful and relaxing ones, snorkeling and fishing. Why would he pick something boring like fishing? Jinhee had no idea, but she was happy that they didn’t have to be around each other all the time – except for the beach games prepared by the teachers, which they were about to do together first before anything else. It was better that way, Jinhee thought, so she wouldn’t have to be distracted throughout the trip.

“Don’t worry, princess. I’ll take care of your prince,” Hangyul said as soon as they were dismissed to go to their rooms.

“He’s not my prince.” Jinhee huffed. “But… yes, please keep an eye on him. It’d be bad if he switches into Woo or Doyeon out here.”

“Oh, man, I forgot he had a girl inside him.” Hangyul rubbed his face and sighed. “Look, I can’t promise I can do anything if she shows up in our room and breaks loose.”

“Guys, we’re in the same room! Woohoo!” Seungyoun came running from the board where the lists of the room assignments were displayed.

“We who? Is Jinhee in our room?” Hangyul asked, getting a weak punch on the arm from the said girl.

“We’ve got the room of six! You, me, Yohanie, two of my friends from another class, and… guess another one!” Seungyoun balled his hands and bounced on his heels in peak excitement.

They all thought of the same name, and shifted their eyes to the same boy, who was tiptoeing behind everybody else and squinting at the lists that he obviously couldn’t read from that distance.

“Whoa, aren’t we lucky? Our roommates are all our friends!” Yohan said, also coming from the crowd surrounding the board.

“We’re the _luckiest_!” Seungyoun beamed and clapped his hands before running towards the crowd. He came back dragging a very bewildered boy behind him. “Kim Wooseok is our roommate too! Yeah!!”

“Jinny, we’re in the same room! Woohoo!” Yeonwoo came running with a bright smile, in the exact same manner as her boyfriend.

“Kids, hurry up and put your bags in your rooms! You can change into comfortable pants, but you have to be back here in ten minutes, we have many things to do. Go, go!” A male teacher ushered the students out of the main hall.

Wooseok walked like a lamb that was about to be sacrificed. He wasn’t sure what would be better; to stay in a room together with strangers who had no idea about his mental _family_ , or with these very loud boys who knew him pretty well, yet also whom he had been trying to avoid. Somehow he thought the former was slightly better. Well, either way, his anxiety would still get worse as soon as he entered the room. It _was_ getting worse as the trip progressed. He hated it so much, feeling so anxious and scared of losing control and switching in front of a bunch of people. Wooseok felt that way on a daily basis at school, yes, but on this trip, he felt much more _exposed._ At school, he could stay in the classroom as much as he could to minimize the chance of embarrassing himself in a bigger crowd, but he couldn’t do that here.

Wooseok was the last to enter their room. Despite having a cozy feel, the room didn’t appear to be that spacious, since a portion of it was taken for the bathroom and the closet. There were three beds on each left and right side of the room, sticking to each other with no barriers. Wooseok could already imagine the worst scenarios that might possibly happen that night. He stood and fidgeted so hard by the door.

“Wooseokie, sleep next to me!” Seungyoun excitedly pointed at the bed on his left, the one in the corner, sticking to the wall.

“He has no idea what he’s getting himself into,” Hangyul whispered to Yohan as he dropped his bag on the bed to Seungyoun’s right. Yohan picked the bed in the corner of the opposite side, facing the one Seungyoun was pointing at. The other two boys from another class claimed the two beds left on Yohan’s side.

“Hi, guys! Welcome!” Seungyoun greeted the two with a bright friendly smile. Of course, the social butterfly were already friends with their new roommates.

“Hey! Cho Seungyoun, Kim Yohan, Lee Hangyul! Whoa, it’s gonna be fun and loud if you guys are here.” The two boys laughed. So, apparently it was not just Seungyoun, but everyone in that room knew each other – except for Wooseok.

All the social interaction made Wooseok feel out of place. Seeing that there were no beds left, he had no choice but to quietly put his bag on the bed of Seungyoun’s suggestion.

“Wooseokie, meet our friends, Kim Joon and Lee Juho! They’re in the soccer club with me,” Seungyoun said.

“We were classmates last year,” Hangyul said, pointing at himself, Yohan, Joon, and Juho.

“Yeah, four of us, also Jinhee and Yeonwoo too,” Yohan added.

_They look good,_ Wooseok thought, feeling so low and little. He was the smallest in the room.

After a brief and rather awkward introduction between Wooseok and the two new roommates, they quickly slipped into shorts and then left the room as soon as a loud sound of a sirene broke in the air – a signal for everyone to gather up.

Soon, their fun beach activities began. Six game spots has been set up along the beach. On the first and biggest spot, all eighty four students in total played together, with a mission to find out their smaller groups for the next five spots.

“If you look over there,” a young male teacher pointed at a wide round area marked by wooden poles, “there are eighty four small colorful pieces of sticky notes buried in the sand. Those papers have your names and your group numbers. You must find and complete your group in ten minutes! If you fail to do so, there will be a punishment, not only for you, but all of your teammates too. So, do help each other! Is everything clear? Okay, you can start searching in three… two… one!”

All eighty four ambitious teenagers rushed to the same spot as if they were chased by a tsunami.

“Move out of my way!” Some boys pushed against each other. Poor little Wooseok got squished between bigger bodies, time and time again until he finally tumbled down flat on the ground. A pair of big hands pulled him up immediately by his sides.

“Geez, feels like Hunger Games, doesn’t it?”

Wooseok easily recognized Hangyul’s distinct husky voice. His classmate gave him a quick pat on the back and a playful, “Don’t die!” before running away and joining the others digging in the sand.

Being saved and pulled up from the ground gave Wooseok a sudden flashback moment, snippets from his dark past that flashed before his eyes. A terrible, _terrible_ timing for that. Fighting hard to push them aside, Wooseok got down on his knees and started scanning for any bright color standing out in the pale sand. He had left his glasses back in the room and his bad eyesight wasn’t helping him at all.

Two minutes into the game, he found a bright orange rolled paper and read the writing on it. An unfamiliar name. He dropped it and continued to search again.

“Yes!! I’ve found mine, I’m in Team 9!” Seungyoun’s high-pitched voice could be heard in the distance. Wooseok panicked, time was ticking and he hadn’t found his.

The fourth sticky note he found was a pink one. His heart skipped a beat.

_Cha Jinhee. Team 3._

Wooseok looked around and found Jinhee poking on the sand together with Yeonwoo. He did _not_ want to go there and give that paper to her. But if he dropped it, she and her whole team might get a punishment.

He ended up going to Yohan instead, since he was the nearest one to him.

“H-Hi, Yohan, would you give this to Jinhee?” Wooseok slipped the paper into Yohan’s hand.

Yohan gawked. “Huh? Why—”

“T-Thank you!” before Yohan could even finish his question, Wooseok had turned on his heels and run away.

“—don’t you give it yourself?” Yohan mumbled the rest of his question to the empty air. He looked at the small pink paper in his hand.

“Five minutes left!” the instructor announced, snapping Yohan back into the game. He sprinted to his crush with no second thoughts.

“Jinhee, here’s yours!”

“Oh?” Jinhee blinked in surprise as Yohan took her hand and put the pink paper in her grip. “Thank you, Yohan—”

“Thank Wooseok!” Smiling, Yohan pointed at the said boy and ran off to continue searching.

Jinhee looked at Wooseok; he was crawling around on four, absolutely looking like a nerd who had dropped his glasses somewhere on the ground. Then, she looked at the paper in her other hand; a light blue one.

_Kim Wooseok. Team 4._

She had found his just a minute ago.

“Babe, I’ve found yours!” Seungyoun came running to Yeonwoo, tripping on his own foot in the process. The couple jumped and giggled together finding out that they were on the same team.

Seungyoun turned to Jinhee and asked, “Have you found yours, Jinny?”

Jinhee answered with a happy nod and a smile. “I’ve also found someone else’s.” She passed the blue paper to Seungyoun. “Could you please give this to him?”

Upon reading the name, Seungyoun’s expression was close to that of winning a lottery. “Of course!” So he ran excitedly until he tripped again on the uneven sand and fell right in front of Wooseok, startling the poor panicking boy.

“Wooseokie, here’s yours, from your _secret_ admirer!” Seungyoun laughed and pointed at Jinhee, who immediately averted her face away and pretended to talk to Yeonwoo.

Seeing which team he was in, Wooseok had mixed feelings, none of which were positive. His mind forced his heart to believe it was a good thing that they weren’t going to have any sort of interaction that day, other than this finding-each-other’s-paper coincidence. Maybe they just weren’t destined to be together.

Or maybe they were, just not in a way they would expect.

“Now that there are ten teams, each of the five posts will have two teams play against each other at a time,” the game instructor explained. “It’s simple, Team 1 versus Team 2, Team 3 versus Team 4, and so on! When you’re done, you can move immediately to the next spot.”

Instead of playing together, they were to play _against_ each other. They both realized that, and both tried their best to ignore each other’s presence as they moved to the next game spot. A huge distance that had been separating them was now gone.

“Hi, Wooseok!”

Wooseok turned his head to find Yohan jog towards him, so they could walk together. They were on the same team, while on the opposing team, there were Hangyul and Jinhee. As always on normal days, Wooseok wondered why at least _one_ of these friends always had to be around him.

“H…Hi.” Wooseok’s answer came out too soft that Yohan didn’t even hear it.

Yohan leaned a little closer and lowered his voice, “I let her know that you found her paper earlier.”

Wooseok’s straight face didn’t give away that he was caught off guard and embarrassed. “Y-You didn’t have to.”

“I don’t play dirty.” Yohan offered a friendly smile and a pat on the back. “Except maybe for these games. Let’s win them all!” He giggled.

If only it had been Wooshin, his ambitious and competitive side would have jumped out, but since it was Wooseok, he would try hard just because he would hate to be a burden to the team.

The next game was a classic one. They were told to stand in line with a spoon in each of their mouths, and what they had to do was passing small pearls to each other one by one using the spoons until the last person dropped it into a bottle. Wooseok got the privilege to be the first person in the line and thus just had to go through half of the awkwardness by facing one person only; Kim Yohan. Other than Yohan’s inability to control his constant giggles – he just couldn’t believe that he could be physically close to Wooseok again – everthing else went well. Their team won by one pearl only.

“You guys did great!” Yohan grinned and gave two thumbs up to Jinhee and Hangyul, while Wooseok walked away suppressing a smile.

_These games are not that bad_ , he thought, starting to get the fun.

The next games were wilder, though. There was the Tug of War game, which was more like a competition between Hangyul and Yohan to see who was stronger – the former and his team managed to pull their opponents tumbling down like domino on the sand. As Wooseok picked himself up from the ground, he saw how Jinhee high-fived Hangyul and laughed so heartily. Her long black waves had been tied up into an adorable bun on top of her head, yet some soft strands were left hanging loose on her nape, and her baby hair was sticking on the sides of her forehead as a thin layer of sweat had seeped out under the hot summer sun.

In Wooseok’s sight, she was glowing, just like the beautiful shimmering blue ocean right behind her.

“She’s pretty, isn’t she?” Yohan’s voice snapped Wooseok back to his senses. He could feel his warm blood rush to his face heating up his flushed cheeks and ears – at least they were already pink due to the hot weather.

“Your face matches your shirt.” Yohan chuckled and brushed off the sand sticking on Wooseok’s pink shirt.

Next post was the Korean chicken fight, where they had to stand and jump around on one foot while trying to knock their opponent down. It did injustice to Wooseok, everyone could see, because none of the boys in Jinhee’s team were his size; he could be easily knocked down unless he was paired with a girl. Nonetheless, still, no adjustment was made and he ended up falling on his butt like a dry tree.

“Oh, no, Wooseokie fell! Will Jinhee run and save him?” Hangyul teased the girl with a hilarious shocked face and a high-pitched voice.

Jinhee masked her worry with a chuckle and pushed Hangyul’s face away. She flicked her fingers and fidgeted – her nervous habit – as she watched Wooseok get up and move to the side. Then, she noticed something.

Wooseok was laughing. A shy, held-back laugh that he hid with his hand.

Jinhee was relieved. The sight of that little laugh was so refreshing, just like the fresh blue ocean right behind him.

His smile was growing. When they raced in the next game, filling two fish tanks with the seawater using holed buckets, his smile grew bigger finding it funny how both teams always lost most of their water before they could even reach their tanks. He covered his mouth and discreetly laughed to himself when the others began to bicker and get frustrated over the game. Jinhee watched him, amused by his unusual reaction, and she couldn’t help but laugh along – although they were standing as far as they could from each other.

Last game, they broke loose. It was a water bomb war, wherein they had to build sandcastles, then knock each other’s castles down with water-filled balloons while protecting their own. They were knocked out of the game if they got hit on the leg, so instead of throwing the balloons at the castles, both teams were jumping about and attacking each other’s legs, guffawing their hearts out. It was a mess; a water bomb was accidentally thrown too high and nearly exploded in Jinhee’s face, Hangyul dodged it with his hand and launched a bomb back as a counterattack, Yohan was a little slow and got hit on the chest. Wooseok was hesitant, but since he was having fun already, he threw a blue balloon and it surprisingly hit Hangyul on the leg. The big muscle boy was out, and Yohan let out a victorious yell as he yanked Wooseok into a fierce bro hug. Avenging Hangyul, Jinhee sent another water bomb, accidentally using too much power because she was laughing with her whole being. A yellow balloon flew high and splashed square in Wooseok’s face.

Jinhee gasped, then collapsed clutching on her shaking belly upon seeing Wooseok barely react like a stunned deer caught in the headlights. His face and bangs were wet.

“Whoa! Jinhee attacked you in the face!” Yohan pulled a dorky shocked face and laughed his dolphin laugh as he shook Wooseok by the shoulder. “Let’s take her down!”

Wooseok blinked multiple times and wiped his face. He pressed his lips together and bowed his head to hold back a smile that was threatening to split up his face. In the midst of it all, he felt another presence in his head, coming to the front, having mistaken the false alarm from the attack.

_I’m fine, Wooshin. We’re having fun!_

He shook his head fighting back the dissociating. After feeling his triggered protector retract back in, at last, Wooseok released his laugh and clapped his hands.

Jinhee turned her back to him, to face Hangyul, and beamed at the big boy like a proud little girl smiling at her father. Chuckling, Hangyul wiped her flushed cheek with his thumb.

“I know, that’s a happy tear.” Hangyul flew his gaze to Wooseok, a soft smile playing on his lips. “I’m happy too.”

Later, during lunch, the students gathered in the dining hall. The whole atmosphere was vibrant after the fun games, and everyone couldn’t be more eager for the main activities following the break time. However, there was one person who suddenly went missing.

Even after having played and laughed together, still, Wooseok chose to distance himself from the others. He was out there, sitting under a palm tree, enjoying his food together with two little birds. The beautiful shades of blue that met on the horizon, the soothing music of nature, the rushing waves in the sea and the chirping birds on the trees, and the soft wind that was caressing his cheeks and toying with his damp hair; those were all good company to Wooseok. He loved the sea, he loved the sky, he loved the water. The blue hue blended so well with him, a person who was blue at heart. He wished he could have been stuck in that moment forever, in this tiny light he had found in his raging storm.

Wooseok had always loved swimming. He had been a good swimmer even as a young child. It was sad that he had no memory of swimming in the sea, hence why he had picked snorkeling as one of the two activities that day. It would have been nice if he could’ve enjoyed it alone – of course, there had to be at least one of those friends around him. Hangyul was going snorkeling too.

“I’ve done other activities a lot before, but not this one. I’ve only tried it once,” Hangyul reasoned. “You must be as good as a mermaid, so guide me.”

Wooseok didn’t think Hangyul needed any guidance. They glided alongside each other under the clear shallow water, over a stunning coral reef and many gorgeous colorful tiny fish of different kinds that were swimming about, scattering away when the boys came close and tried to touch them.

Hangyul didn’t forget his promise to Jinhee to keep an eye on Wooseok. In order to keep him by his side, Hangyul held the other’s wrist every so often and pointed at every fascinating little fish he saw, showing it to him with an excitement of a little kid – could be seen from his wide eyes behind his mask. Just an act to grasp Wooseok’s attention, of course, because Hangyul was overly anxious about the other boy suddenly switching under water while none of their friends were around. He was the only one who knew Wooseok’s condition there.

It started awkward, yet somewhere in the wordless, silent attempt to be friendly, under the clear water and above the coral reef, they managed to find the unfamiliar comfort of finally starting to get along with someone they hadn’t expected.

“Thanks,” Hangyul said later, after they had returned and were getting ready for the next activity.

“Hm?” Wooseok hummed, busy arranging his stuff in his backpack. He thought he might have heard it wrong.

Hangyul stopped what Wooseok was doing. “Thank you.” He gave a light squeeze on the other’s frail shoulder and offered a sincere smile. “Well, for not avoiding me for once. It was nice snorkeling with you. I know, we’re so different, but it’s nice to hang with you.”

Hangyul was fast to retract his hand from Wooseok’s shoulder and turn away to continue rummaging through his own bag, knowing well about the personal space limit. Wooseok was thankful for that.

“…It would’ve been nicer with the others,” Wooseok murmured, but Hangyul heard him.

“I’ve had enough of ‘the others’, but not you.” Hangyul smiled to himself. “I don’t deal with your nonsense every day. No, not directly.”

Hangyul’s simple playful remark lingered in Wooseok’s mind. Even when he was away fishing in the sea, together with several other students on a fishing boat, he thought of those words. Holding a fishing rod, gazing far into the horizon as he patiently waited for just a little tug, he wondered if he had bothered everyone way too much with his _nonsense,_ if his closer friends, like those three sitting around him in class every day, had had enough of his unstability. Or maybe they were used to it, like how Hangyul was used to their _nonsense_ too, so he didn’t really mind after all. He could even joke about it. But their nonsense was a different kind of nonsense, wasn’t it? Wooseok wasn’t the same. He shook his head and sighed. He was overthinking again.

“Yaaaahahahaaaa!”

Wooseok squinted at the bright yellow, flying fish-shaped rubber boat in the distance, being pulled so fast by a speedboat that it was literally flying in the air. From what he had overheard, Seungyoun and Yeonwoo had chosen the Flying Fish watersport as one of their activities, and even though he couldn’t discern the faces on the boat, Wooseok could’ve sworn it was Seungyoun’s scream he had heard just now. That distinct voice just couldn’t be missed even in the open sea.

A small, held-back smile found its way to Wooseok’s lips, as he visualized the Yeon couple scream and laugh together as they always did.

_I miss them._

He sighed.

_Smack!_ Something wet and slimy came flying and slapped him square on his cheek. Wooseok jumped in surprise, touched his wet cheek, and hurriedly wiped it with the sleeve of his shirt as soon as he saw what had hit him – a fish that was then flopping like crazy on the boat’s floor.

“Oh my gosh, I’m so sorry!” A short girl with glasses next to him bowed and gave him an apologetic look while trying to catch her fish in her grip. “It jumped off my hands!”

“It-It’s okay, it’s okay.” While the others got bust trying to help her with the fish, quietly Wooseok moved away to the other side of the boat. He looked down at the water and frowned. It had been nearly half an hour, others had caught two, three, or four fish, but nothing had touched his bait.

His focus was fast to flutter away as a particular person returned to his mind. Earlier, he had also overheard Hangyul and Seungyoun talk about how they would never try parasailing because they were big scaredy cats, and while at it, they had mentioned something about both Yohan and Jinhee going for the banana boat together. Wooseok couldn’t help but wonder, would Yohan make use of that chance to the fullest? Well, why wouldn’t he? Wooseok pouted, unwittingly.

Only when he was gone too deep in his jealousy did he feel a hard tug on his line. Snapping back to his senses, excitedly he pulled his rod back and spun the reel, like the guide fisherman had taught them beforehand. Whatever kind of fish it was, Wooseok just knew it wasn’t small, because of how hard it was fighting. His expectant eyes were round and sparkly when he could finally see his first ever fish come to the surface.

“I-I’ve got something!” a fisherman rushed to him with a net and he dunked his fish into it before he could get another fish slap.

“Wow, it’s a big red snapper! This will make a really good meal!” the middle-aged fisherman laughed and gave Wooseok a proud pat on the back. The boy’s chest swelled with pride.

_I can catch a fish! I’ve caught a big fish…_ He looked around with a smile plastered on his face. Other students still remained on their spots, some turning their heads to see the fish out of curiosity, just to focus back on fishing so they could catch something bigger. Wooseok’s smile faltered. A hint of blue arose and spread in his heart, like a drop of blue watercolor seeping and spreading on a piece of white paper.

On normal days, he wondered why at least one of that group of friends – Jinhee and her friends – always had to be around him. Now that none of them was around to see what he had just achieved, he felt _incomplete_.

Meanwhile, not far away, Jinhee was squealing and laughing on a yellow banana-shaped boat, being pulled by a speedboat that was picking up its pace. Behind her was Yohan, cackling as he held onto the boat with one hand and teased Jinhee with the other one, shaking her by the lifejacket with minimum force.

“They’re going to drop us! They’re going to drop us!” Jinhee gasped and yelped as the speedboat took a sharp turn and intentionally flipped the banana boat upside down, tossing everyone on it into the water. Jinhee let out a hearty laugh and wiped her face as she tried to regain her balance in the water.

Only when she was swimming back to the boat did she realize; Yohan had been holding the back of her lifejacket and supporting her from behind ever since they had plunged into the water.

“Yohan, it’s fine, I can swim well.” Jinhee chuckled.

Beaming bashfully, Yohan pushed her up and helped her get back onto the boat. “I know, just wanted to make sure everything’s safe.”

“Thank you.” Jinhee rewarded him with a bright grin. It wasn’t that she didn’t notice the bulging muscles when Yohan pulled himself up with his strong arms, but what stole her attention were his reddening ears instead.

If only this scene had happened in their freshman year, Jinhee thought she would have mentally exploded into thousands of tiny squealing pieces because of how adorable and manly he was. But some things had changed.

As soon as they returned to the shore for their free time to play around the beach, Jinhee flew her gaze around to scan for a certain skinny boy. She and Yohan met Seungyoun and Yeonwoo instead, who were still mindblown after their thrilling flying-fish ride. The couple couldn’t stop blabbering about it while they walked barefoot along the shore, saying that Jinhee should have tried it with them too because it could have been _life-changing_ for her and her fear of height.

Jinhee stopped abruptly in her track and her heart skipped a beat as soon as she spotted someone in the distance; Wooseok was crouching down by the shore, letting the water come closer washing his feet just to retreat back after, repeatedly, while he was poking into the sand for some tiny shells.

Out of the blue, an unfamiliar boy came and pushed Wooseok hard from behind, causing him to collapse forward face first into the water. He gasped, and so did Jinhee, Yohan, Seungyoun, and Yeonwoo.

“What the heck??” Yeonwoo snarled, ready to launch herself towards the crime scene. Seungyoun held her back.

“Let me handle this,” Seungyoun said. “Jinhee, do you want to come?”

Jinhee chewed on her bottom lip, conflicted. She answered with a helpless sigh, “He probably doesn’t want to have me around, not to mention in that situation.” She gave Seungyoun a pleading puppy face. “Please help him out.”

“Alright, you guys go ahead, I’ll catch up.” Seungyoun didn’t wait a second longer before running towards Wooseok, who was then wet and dirty.

“Hey! That’s not cool, man, are you in the kindergarten or what?” Seungyoun grabbed the bully by the shoulder and moved him away from Wooseok. He stepped in as a shield covering Wooseok with his body and fiercely stared down at the unknown boy.

Facing someone bigger and taller, the bully slowly took steps back. “Tsk, you’re no fun. Bye, sucker!” Just like that, he turned on his heels and ran away.

Seungyoun turned around and proceeded to wipe off the sand sticking on Wooseok’s wet shirt. “Who is he?”

“My classmate last year.” Wooseok stopped the other’s hands and bowed his head. “…Thank you. I’ll take care of myself.”

“You want me to leave you alone?” Seungyoun asked, genuinely wanting to know the answer.

Wooseok’s lips remained shut and his gaze was fixated on the ground. Seungyoun chose not to push further.

“So, how was fishing? Did you catch any?” the taller boy asked again, this time with a friendlier tone.

Wooseok nodded, bowing his head deeper to hide his small, suppressed smile. “A big red snapper. Just one.”

“Oh, that’s awesome!” Seungyoun perked up, surprised and happy to finally get a proper answer from he other boy. “I wouldn’t have caught any. Fishing must be your hidden talent! Just need more practice… Trust me, a pilot doesn’t fly an airplane as soon as he pops out of his mom’s womb.”

Wooseok didn’t agree about him having a hidden talent for fishing, yet he opted to keep it in. Seungyoun’s eagerness to assure him made him feel warm inside. How could he still be so nice after Wooseok had constantly shut him and the others out? Wooseok thought he didn’t deserve friends like them.

Their free time was meant as a chance for them to find some inspiration by exploring on their own, or recall their activities that day and decide how to transform their experience into a whole piece of art for their homework. Seungyoun didn’t take Wooseok to see the other friends; like a paper boat that was carried away by the steady stream of a calm river, they both walked along the shore, not exactly side by side, but not too far from each other either. It was Seungyoun who had initiated to follow Wooseok like a persistent, orphaned puppy, just so the smaller boy wouldn’t feel so lonely. The sun was on its way back to its slumber, and the sky was painted with beautiful shades of pink and orange, the colors reflected on the glimmering surface of the ocean. Both boys had their phones in their hands, snapping several pictures of the breathtaking scenery. Peace and comfort enveloped them despite no words said between them. They were so engrossed in it that they didn’t notice the presence of two girls just meters away, hiding behind a palm tree, secretly taking pictures of them like some paparazzi catching an idol couple on a date.

“Woah, handsome silhouette.” Yeonwoo gaped at the photo of her boyfriend that she had just taken. “I’ll definitely print this and put this up on my bedroom’s wall! Can this be printed in a billboard size?”

Jinhee gave no answers, because she was busy staring at her own phone screen. There was only Wooseok in the photo, standing on a big rock by the shore, his sandals carried in his hand. She had only managed to capture his side profile from her spot, yet when she zoomed in on his face, she knew the picture was enough. The corner of his lips pulled up into a small smile, and his eyes were smiling too, behind his round glasses, as he admired the twilight sky. A photo of smiling Wooseok was enough for her.

_I’ll treasure this photo forever._

She shoved her phone back into her pocket and beamed at the sky.

Seungyoun didn’t leave Wooseok’s side until they were all sent back to their rooms. They were given less than an hour to wash up before dinner time. As soon as they met up with their roommates, they were quick to decide that showering together was inevitable – two would go at once to save time. Joon and Juho rushed into the small bathroom first.

Wooseok fidgeted at the door while the other three boys were busy with their bags and clothes. From the looks of it, he wouldn’t have enough time to shower for sure.

“Guys, hurry up, we only have thirty minutes!” Yohan exclaimed while rummaging through his bag, taking out some clean clothes and his toiletries.

“It’s a bit awkward in here!” Came an answer echoing in the bathroom.

“I’m not going in with that guy.” Hangyul pointed at Seungyoun. “Yohan, let me go with you.”

“Shouldn’t the three of us shower together?” Yohan asked. “Wooseok might want to shower alone. He looks uncomfortable.”

Wooseok supported the idea immediately with a fervent nod, but Seungyoun had a different thought.

“It’s a tight space in there and there’s only one shower head, it’s gonna take longer than necessary if three of us take turns to use it!” Seungyoun ditched his bag and went to Wooseok with a puppy face. “Seokie, shower with me? I-I can face the wall if you’re uncomfortable!”

Wooseok hugged himself and shied away from Seungyoun, avoiding to look at his sad pouty face at all cost. “I-I’ll just shower later… before going to bed.”

“Why? You’re all wet and sticky! And you smell like the seawater. Are you going to stay like that when everyone else is fresh and clean?” Seungyoun whined. “Ahh, fine then! You go before me. I’ll shower last.”

“N-No,” Wooseok shook his head, “you first.”

The first two boys finished and came out of the bathroom. Yohan rushed Hangyul into it right away while Seungyoun and Wooseok went on with their little negotiation.

“No, you first. What if you don’t have enough time? There will be no food left for you if you come late! I won’t shower if you don’t shower.” Seungyoun went to Wooseok’s bed and allowed himself to open the other’s bag.

“W-What are you doing?” Wooseok tried to snatch his bag, but it was too easy for Seungyoun to block him with his bigger build.

When Seungyoun turned around, there were already a clean white shirt and a pair of black training pants in his hands, along with an underwear and some toiletries.

“I’ve prepared these for you, now you gotta wash up.” Seungyoun flashed a smile that made Wooseok feel uneasy.

“Have you never showered with anyone before?” Joon asked Wooseok while drying his hair with his towel. Wooseok shook his head. “Well. It was my first time too,” Joon shrugged. “No worries, it’s not _that_ awkward.” He turned his head to Juho and they both burst into snickers.

“Right, just focus on washing up and don’t look anywhere below.” Juho laughed.

Wooseok’s gaze met with Seungyoun’s in a split-second eye contact. He could barely process what was going on when Seungyoun grabbed his wrist and pulled him into the bathroom as soon as their two friends came out.

“Let’s hurry! Only ten minutes left!” Seungyoun shut the bathroom door and threw his shirt off, causing Wooseok to gasp and press his back flat against the wall defensively. The smaller boy squeezed his eyes shut and whimpered when the rest of Seungyoun’s clothes were slid off and thrown to the corner. He began to hyperventilate.

“S-Seungyoun, let me get out—”

“I won’t look at you! Really, I won’t! Open your eyes if you don’t believe me, I’m facing the wall.” Seungyoun turned his back to the other and proceeded to wet his hair under the shower.

Wooseok opened an eye and regretted it right away; he was greeted by a pair of perky buns. Seungyoun didn’t lie, though, he was really facing the wall.

Wooseok could hear another voice in his head.

_“Move, nerd. Don’t you want to have dinner?”_

Deep down, Wooseok had more trust for Seungyoun than he had for any other boys, although it wasn’t the biggest trust someone could have. He _did_ want to have dinner, though, and honestly he couldn’t wait to rid himself from all the saltwater smell and stickiness. So, turning around, he took his clothes off hesitantly and walked backwards to stand under the shower head at Seungyoun’s cue. So they showered like that; backs facing each other, taking turns to stand under the shower head.

Just by being that close to Wooseok in a small space and not saying anything put Seungyoun on edge; he wanted to talk because staying quiet wasn’t his style. Still, he thought it was already a wonderful miracle that Wooseok was willing to join in, so he wasn’t going to push it further. He might end up saying something stupid.

Even so, Wooseok, being able to sense the other’s discomfort, surprisingly opted to fill that silence in.

“W-Wooshin is close by,” he said.

Seungyoun’s eyebrows shot up in surprise, thinking, _Wow, he’s talking to me first._ He smiled happily at the wall while his hands roamed all over his own body, soaping himself. “A-Ah, you can feel him coming?” he asked, “Is he going to come out now?”

“I’m not sure,” Wooseok said, “but he’s talking in my head.”

“He must be calling me a giant idiot.” Seungyoun chuckled.

“H-He is.” Wooseok smiled bashfully to himself. His honest answer made the other’s laugh intensify.

_That giant idiot is taking too much space,_ Wooshin grumbled in Wooseok’s mind.

_This isn’t so bad, though,_ Wooseok thought.

Not until Seungyoun’s clumsy self dropped his shampoo bottle to the floor; their butts collided with each other as he bent down to pick it up. A startled yelp and a whimper jumped out of Wooseok’s mouth upon the brief contact.

“Oh, I’m sorry! I’m so sorry! I didn’t mean to touch you!” Seungyoun apologized repeatedly. The other’s soft whines eventually forced him to turn around.

All wet and exposed, Wooseok had his front sticking to the wall and his face buried in his hands, muffling what sounded like quiet sobs.

Seungyoun would hate himself forever for this – he had said that he wouldn’t look, but he caught himself looking down. Hence, he became the very first person who ever saw Wooseok’s hidden scars – besides the person who had left them.

Since they were done anyway, Seungyoun grabbed Wooseok’s towel and gently wrapped it around him from behind.

“Wooseokie… Don’t cry, I’m so sorry.” Seungyoun’s voice sounded painfully and genuinely sad. “I shouldn’t have forced you to shower with me. Of course I would mess up.”

The traumatized boy shook his head and refused to show his face. “I-I’m sorry,” he stammered, “I’m… I’m o-overreacting.”

Seungyoun couldn’t help but think, _Something terrible must’ve happened lately if he reacts this way, he’s gotten worse… If his trauma is this bad, will anyone ever be able to touch him? What about his future sex life? Ah wait, no, it’s too far… but still it’s a big problem. Ah… Poor you…_

Rapid knocks on the door had them flinch in surprise. “Guys, what are you doing?? Everyone else is already leaving their rooms!” Yohan’s voice came from the other side.

“You guys go ahead, we’ll catch up soon!” Seungyoun exclaimed. They put their clothes on quickly, and once they were ready to get out, Seungyoun enveloped Wooseok in a protective hug.

“You can be angry at me because I didn’t keep my words,” he whispered, “I’ve seen your privacy without your permission. But I’m thankful we can be close again on this trip. Please don’t push me away again. I-I’ll be someone like a brother whom you can trust, if you let me.”

Wooseok wiped his eyes and bowed his head as the other boy ushered him out. Their roommates had left the room.

“…Don’t touch me.”

Seungyoun knew by the deeper voice that Wooseok’s protector had come out like a reliable shield.

“Okay, I won’t. I’m sorry, Wooshinie.”

“You’re an idiot.”

“I’m an idiot.”

Wooshin didn’t stay for long; when he zoned out a little, Wooseok came through and regained his control. Seungyoun knew he was back when he put on his round glasses and blinked at him in a slightly disoriented state. Seungyoun was proud to say that he had gotten better at distinguishing the Woo’s, even when they were silent.

Their walk to the dining hall was spent in silence. Wooseok looked anything but happy to be heading back to where people gathered up; he’d rather skip dinner and just go to bed. He was starving, though. And it wasn’t like he hadn’t lost enough weight.

Seungyoun had noticed it, like all their other friends had. Wooseok had always been thin, but he was even scrawnier than before. He looked so frail and small in his somewhat oversized shirt that was tucked into his pants, his ankles not bigger than Seungyoun’s wrists, looking like they could break easily with a single snap. The full view that Seungyoun had seen in the shower had nearly made him shed a tear.

He wished he could help Wooseok go back to his happier times, when he had lived with Jinhee’s family. His cheeks had just gotten a little chubbier the last time their group had sat together for lunch. No matter how desperate he was to help, though, Wooseok and Wooshin still wouldn’t let anyone help them. The true reason remained a mystery.

“Seokie, let’s eat a lot tonight. Okay?” Seungyoun averted his gaze away and blinked back his tears. “You’ve caught a fish today, so you have to eat well.”

As expected, the dining hall was crowded and loud with students chattering and laughing about their fun day over the freshly cooked dinner. In the middle was a long table serving various kinds of seafood, those that the students had caught on their own, with the addition of more from the fish market nearby and non-seafood dishes from the villa. Luckily, the two boys still managed to grab a full portion despite coming late.

Seungyoun spotted a few pairs of arms waving at him, at one of the tables. “Oh, there they are!” He perked up recognizing Hangyul, Yohan, Jinhee, and Yeonwoo. “Seokie, let’s go there!”

Getting no answers, he turned and looked around like a lost puppy. Wooseok was nowhere to be seen.

“Wooseokie?” Instead of going to his friends, Seungyoun began to look for Wooseok while carrying his untouched food around.

It was only ten minutes later when he finally found Wooseok eating alone in the corner, far from the other students, near where the villa’s employees were washing the dishes. Seungyoun contemplated approaching the other boy; should he accompany him? Should he give him some space?

In the end, he chose to hide behind a stack of chairs and eat there alone while watching over Wooseok from the distance.

From that short moment, Seungyoun came to one conclusion; Wooseok’s feelings for Jinhee hadn’t changed one bit. The nerdy boy kept turning his head and flying his gaze to the girl in the distance every so often, at some points looking so sad and empty that he totally forgot he had food in his mouth. Seungyoun could see that Jinhee wasn’t the brightest that evening either, while the rest of the table was joking and laughing, she remained lost in her own mind, poking on her food instead of eating it. Once every several minutes, she craned her neck and looked around, obviously searching for someone, just to give up and go back on pouting to herself. Seeing them like that, suddenly Seungyoun lost his appetite. He didn’t feel like eating anymore.

Tears slid down his cheeks as he watched Wooseok bow his head deep, take his glasses off and wipe his watery eyes with the back of his bony hand.

_Why, Wooseok?_ Seungyoun bit his lip in a helpless attempt to stop his own tears. _Why are you doing this to yourself?_

Wooseok hadn’t even finished half of his food, yet he got up and handed his unfinished dinner to the villa’s employee to clean up, apologizing as he had to waste the food. He didn’t wait a second longer to leave the dining hall and return to his room.

As if the last string of his self control had snapped, Seungyoun left his hiding spot and ran after Wooseok as fast as he could. He saw another person moving fast out of the corner of his eye – it was Jinhee, on the other side of the room, running after the very same boy. Gradually Seungyoun’s feet slowed down until he stopped outside, hiding once again, this time behind the wall. It was dark outside, and moreover he was wearing all black; the few yellow lights around wouldn’t be enough to expose him right away even though he stepped out.

_Please make peace. Please make peace._ He chanted in his head as he watched Jinhee stop Wooseok in his track.

“H-Hey! Can we, um, maybe talk for a bit?” Jinhee offered an awkward smile. Wooseok was startled and frozen on his spot.

“…S-Sorry, I… I have to g-go back to my room.” Wooseok bowed his head and walked past the girl.

Jinhee gaped at the empty air. Yet another rejection she got. No, she didn’t want to give up just yet.

“It… It had been a while!” She turned around to see Wooseok stop once again. “It had been a while, but today you smiled again. I’m… I hope you’re having a good time. I just wanted to say this. Please forget what makes you sad for a while. If… If you stay alone, it’ll be hard to forget that.”

Wooseok didn’t budge, neither leaving nor answering.

“You don’t have to talk to me if you don’t want to.” Jinhee’s voice quivered. “But you also have the others, you know that, right? Seungyoun… at least let him in. You trust him, don’t you?”

Getting no answers, Jinhee let out an exhausted, defeated sigh and decided to just go back to the dining hall. Wooseok didn’t spare another glance before running back to his room with tears in his eyes.

“Baby.”

Seungyoun snapped his head around hearing the very familiar soft voice of his girlfriend. Yeonwoo stepped closer to him and looked up into the tall boy’s eyes, her fingers gently wiping away the trails of tears left on his cheeks.

“I...” Seungyoun’s breath hitched. “I just wanted to make sure they were okay.”

“I know you’re worried.” The girl smiled. “We’re all worried too. Let’s give him space to sort his feelings out for now, shall we?”

Before they could get caught by a lurking teacher, Yeonwoo tiptoed and placed a quick kiss on Seungyoun’s cheek, successfully bringing his usual smile back to his lips.

An hour after dinner was spent by the students and teachers to review their activities that day, sharing their experience and some inspiration they had found for their homework. The next fifteen minutes, a teacher briefed all the sleepy teens on their schedule and activities for the following day. Wooseok wasn’t present the whole time; he was curling like a scared kitten in his bed, covered by the blanket from head to toe. The thoughts that were running through his mind had caused him to feel extremely agitated. To make it worse, he was having flashbacks too, about a past school trip that had taken place when he had been barely aware of his disorder.

Young Wooseok had been walking together with a group of other kids, led by a very kind female teacher at the front, going around a big museum. He had lost himself back then; at one moment, he had still been walking next to his classmate, and the next moment, suddenly he had found himself alone at an ice cream shop nearby, with a cup of chocolate ice cream in his hands – not a flavor of his choice, because Wooseok’s favorite had always been mint choco. He had freaked out and gone on full-on crying in public because he had thought that he had somehow teleported to a foreign city – due to the ice cream shop’s French style interior – and he had ended up being taken back to his group by two older high school boys, who had coincidentally run away from their school trip to the same museum.

That was what had led to the unforgettable moment when his nerdy male classmate had said, “I knew it, he has Dissociative Identity Disorder.” The very first time Wooseok had heard of that term.

Now, Wooseok was _terrified._ What if he got lost again? What if he found himself not at an ice cream shop, but in a cave somewhere in the dark woods, with some dangerous wild animals waiting to eat him outside? No, it didn’t even have to go that far; what if he lost control that night, when the other five boys were back in their room? Wooseok was aware that there had been changes in him ever since he had returned to his uncle’s place. The new, worse trauma experience had caused splits in his system, creating new, unfamiliar alters who didn’t speak to him like Wooshin and Woo did. Just after he had started to get to know those two boys better with the help from Doctor Cha and his children, now he felt like his system had become unfamiliar all over again. And the worst part that could possibly occur in this trip was that someone might encounter his new alters before he could even understand them and their motives.

Wooseok knew about Kim Doyeon. Just a day after the female alter’s first appearance in public, Seungyoun had told him what had happened in details, to which Wooseok had responded with a mild panic attack. The first thing that had crossed his mind was, _I have a girl inside me, I’m doomed,_ and the next thing was, _Why does she have to use that name?_ It had given him flashbacks about Son Doyeon, his first love in middle school. But contrary to what Jinhee had assumed, Kim Doyeon wasn’t really all that similar to Son Doyeon, although both of them had such a deep passion for music. Something that young Wooseok had admired so much about his first love.

The female alter had come from the memory of when Son Doyeon had taught Wooseok how to play the piano, in the music room during recess every day. But now, after harsh years he had spent without her, Wooseok’s memories about her had become incomplete, blurry movie scenes. The _first love_ title was there, well, just as a title. No more romantic feelings attached to it whatsoever.

Doyeon the alter seemed confused most of the time, she didn’t come out often and didn’t bother talking to the other alters as well. She was a cheerful extroverted girl when she came out, though, as what Seungyoun had also told Wooseok after Doyeon had come out at school two more times. Wooseok supposed that maybe Doyeon’s role in the system was like a happy pill, taking over when the system’s mood was too blue for her liking, so she could absorb some positive energy from socializing and playing music – and some subtle flirting with Yohan, perhaps. Wooseok didn’t want to know more about that part.

Apart from her wish to have a boyfriend, Wooseok didn’t think he had any other problems with Doyeon. Okay, he could try to accept her too like he had done before with his male alters. The big problem here was the other undiscovered alters – no one outside his system knew about their presence. Not even Seungyoun, not even Jinhee. But Wooshin had warned him about their existence.

“Wooseokie?”

Seungyoun’s voice was immediately followed by Yohan’s giggle and the other three boys’ chattering. The door was shut and the bed next to Wooseok’s shifted a little, a sign that the owner was back in it. Wooseok’s eyes were wide like an owl’s under the blanket, shaking as his anxiety level escalated.

“Wooseokie, are you still awake? Are you okay?” Seungyoun asked, “Is it okay if we turn the lights off?”

“Yes,” Wooseok answered, almost whispering. He was used to sleeping in the dark.

“You guys want to sleep now? Right away?” Yohan asked. He was still full of energy.

“What do you want to do? Go out to the sea with some fishermen?” Hangyul asked while changing into his sleepwear, just like the others. “Go to sleep, we’re going to suffer tomorrow morning. I bet they’ll blast sirens in our ears when the sky is still dark outside. It will feel like we’ve only slept for five minutes.”

“Ah, this is no fun. It’s only 10 PM.” Pouting, Yohan gave in and slipped into the blanket anyway. “Good night, everyone!”

“Good night.”

Hangyul switched the lights off, and after some rustling sounds of the boys getting into comfortable positions in their beds, silence fell upon the room.

Seungyoun tried to pull Wooseok’s cover down a little. “Seokie, can you breathe in there?” he whispered, “Don’t cover your head.”

There were no responses.

_Are you asleep already?_ Seungyoun wondered. He wanted to uncover Wooseok’s head _so_ bad, to let him breathe properly, and maybe to see his face too and make sure he was okay.

_No… I should give him space to sort his feelings out._ Seungyoun remembered Yeonwoo’s advice.

So he sighed and closed his eyes.

An hour had passed and the boys were out cold after the long exhausting day when Wooseok’s head finally emerged from the cover. Seeing the face next to him, sleeping with some drool flowing out his open mouth, Wooseok widened his eyes and covered his mouth – in a feminine gesture.

“…Why the hell am I sleeping with this guy? His girlfriend must be out to get me right now.”

Kim Doyeon had arrived.

She peeked into the blanket to make sure everything was safe down there, just in case, maybe the guy had done something stupid to her. Well, she was fully dressed in Wooseok’s sleepwear.

Still, she frowned at Seungyoun. The urge to hit him was getting too strong. So she slapped him on the cheek – not too hard, but enough to rouse him from his deep slumber.

“…Huh…? _Hunghh_ —Five more minutes, Mom,” Seungyoun murmured with closed eyes.

“Mom my ass. Why are you sleeping next to me?”

“Because I love you, Mom.”

Doyeon rolled her eyes. She decided to get up and find out the answer herself. When she sat up, though, the sight of four other snoring boys caught her off guard and made her freeze up.

“Where on earth is this place? Why am I sleeping in a room full of guys? Is this… perhaps… a whorehouse?” Doyeon crossed her arms covering the flat chest. “Was I sold to these disgusting pigs? Oh, wait.”

Doyeon narrowed her eyes at the boy sleeping in the bed facing hers, on the opposite side, trying to discern the face that seemed familiar. She noticed the bunny teeth.

“Could it be?” The female alter in Wooseok’s body crawled off the bed to get a closer look, and then slapped a hand over her mouth to muffle her sharp gasp. “Oh gosh, it’s really Kim Yohan. Why is he here in this whorehouse? Are you really that kind of guy, Kim Yohan?”

After trying to identify the rest of the boys, though, she thought out loud, “Or… maybe this isn’t that kind of place? There’s this yaoi guy too,” she pointed at Hangyul, “and these other two guys don’t look legal either.”

The longer Doyeon stood there, shifting her gaze back and forth between the door and Yohan, the more conflicted she was. She was torn between exploring the place and using the golden chance while Yohan wasn’t shrieking and running away from her.

She chose the latter.

Just a moment later, Doyeon found herself snuggled together with Yohan, lying dangerously close to him under his blanket. Yohan stirred in his sleep feeling the other’s movements. His arms collided with the body next to him; thinking that it was a bolster, he threw his limbs around the body. Doyeon let out a quiet gasp, which quickly turned into satisfied giggles as she blushed.

“Your face looks like a really good meme material right now, but I still like it. You’re a handsome dork.”

The classic romantic Korean drama vibe was getting to her head. As Doyeon stared at Yohan’s silly sleeping face, ever so slowly, she leaned closer and closer, shutting her eyes and puckering her lips.

Even though this was a moment she had been waiting for, Kim Doyeon believed she wasn’t a cheap girl who would throw herself at random handsome guys and serve their lips with a nice sensational kiss for free. Nope, Yohan had to learn to respect her more for that. So, for the meantime…

She kissed him on the nose.

And the smooching sound got Yohan’s eyes to pop open.

“…”

“…Hi?”

“…AAAAAAAHHHHHH!! KIM WOOSEOK!!”

Everyone in the room shot up from their sleep straight into a sitting position. The initially quiet room was sudenly filled with chaotic noises, a mixture of horrified screaming and groggy questions as to where the light switch was and if there was a fire or an earthquake.

It was dark, and Yohan really didn’t mean to be violent, but accidentally, his flailing arm smacked Doyeon across the face. The girl in Wooseok’s body was left stupefied.

“You… You hit me.” She held her cheek, starting to brim with tears. “You’re mean to me.”

“I-I-I’m sorry I didn’t mean it—”

“I hate you!”

Before they knew it, Doyeon had fled the room. Seungyoun was the first to snap out of the shock.

“I’ll go get him back, you guys don’t come after us!” Seungyoun swerved in his track trying to regain his balance and full consciousness, still with screwed heavy eyes and his messy bed hair sticking out. He looked like a young father being awakened by his newborn baby’s wailing in the middle of the night.

“Wooseokie, wait for me!” He yelled. “Ah, wait... It must be the girl... Kim Doyeon! Wait for me!”

“Go away, asshole!”

“I’m not an asshole! Wait—Don’t go there, those are the girls’ rooms!”

“I _am_ a girl! Leave me alone!”

Spotting a male teacher patrolling around in the distance, Seungyoun picked up his pace to catch Doyeon, who was already running into the female area.

“This is bad, this is _really_ bad,” Seungyoun muttered to himself as he recalled that particular rule about entering the opposite gender’s rooms. He grimaced. _How do I tell her that she’s not physically a girl without offending her?_

Unfortunately for him, before he could even tell her anything, the patrolling teacher heard the sound of their loud footsteps and quickly went to check what all those noises were about. Seungyoun captured Doyeon right on time.

“Let go!” Doyeon wriggled in Seungyoun’s arms, while the taller greeted their teacher with an innocent grin.

“What are you doing here in the girls’ area?” the male teacher looked askance at the two teenagers.

“Ah, uh, m-my friend here was sleepwalking! He is still sleepwalking right now! Seems like he’s having a really bad nightmare.” Seungyoun laughed and covered the other’s whole face with his big hand. The teacher raised an eyebrow, clearly not buying his absurd excuse. “I-I’ll take him back to our room right now!”

“Liar!!” Doyeon roared behind Seungyoun’s hand. Before she could take another extreme measure, Seungyoun swept her off the ground and dashed away from the teacher’s presence, carrying the smaller body bridal style.

The teacher sighed and massaged his temple. “I’m getting too old for this.” He decided to let it slide.

“Let!” _Slap!_ “Go!” _Slap!_ “Of!” _Slap!_ “Me!!”

“Ow! Ow! Ow!” Seungyoun let out a fake sob while Wooseok’s female alter slapped his cheeks left and right all the way.

“Why are you taking me back there?? Why are you forcing me like this?!” Doyeon grabbed a fistful of Seungyoun’s messy hair tugging his head down.

“Because this is almost midnight and we have to wake up early tomorrow and _that_ body needs to rest!” Seungyoun struggled to control his words. _That body doesn’t belong to you only! Wooseokie had a long day, he’ll feel worn out tomorrow!_

Exhausted himself and getting somewhat emotional, he ended up saying in a stern voice, “I can easily make you let go of my hair and put you in bed, but I’ll give you a chance to do it of your own will.”

Doyeon was stunned. Her grip on Seungyoun’s locks loosened, and slowly her hands were retracted. Something in her eyes changed as she stared wide-eyed at his face.

“I hope that didn’t come out too harsh.” Seungyoun slowed down once they were close to their designated room.

The other teen’s gaze faltered, seeming to be zoning out. The pretty doe eyes then blinked multiple times. Seungyoun started to get worried. At this point, he could recognize some signs of the dissociating and switching between Wooseok’s alters.

“…No… That’s not harsh at all.”

Seungyoun gulped. An alarm went off in his head. That voice; it was another new voice. He couldn’t recognize it. It definitely didn’t sound like a masculine voice; soft and velvety, yet deeper and huskier than Doyeon’s voice.

And _breathy._ It sounded… _seductive._

“Um, hello? Who’s there?” Seungyoun asked cautiously.

The alter chuckled, and catching Seungyoun off guard, wrapped both arms around his broad shoulders and buried her face on the crook of his neck.

“I’m Jamie… A sexual protector.”

Seungyoun nearly dropped the body. First, he was surprised by the word _sexual,_ and second, the alter answered in perfect _English_. As far as he knew, Wooseok had excellent scores in English class, just like in other classes, but his Korean accent was very thick. This alter, though, Seungyoun would believe it if she told him she was American.

“Or… You can call me… Bae Jaemi.” The girl continued in Korean, touching her bottom lip with the tip of her index finger, smiling seductively. Her Korean name literally meant _fun,_ and it seemed as if she wanted to make sure the boy could see that she lived up to her name. “I’m Korean American. And I’m legal… Are you?”

Seungyoun came to a halt outside their room. _There’s no way I can bring this woman in,_ he thought in panic.

“I-I’m not legal age yet.” Seungyoun shook his head feverishly. “No one here is legal age, except the teachers. We’re all high school sophomores.”

Jaemi pouted. “Oh, well, that’s too bad. I’ll just have fun on my own.” She got herself off of Seungyoun’s arms in a sassy manner.

“W-Wait!” Seungyoun held the other’s shoulder, and quickly took his hand back as soon as a triumphant smile creeped across her lips. No, Wooseok’s lips. Seungyoun slapped himself in order to get that very wrong image of Wooseok out of his head.

“A little touchy, aren’t you?” Jaemi chuckled. The glint in her eyes was mysterious and playful, as if trying to lure Seungyoun in.

“N-No, that’s not it… I-I want to ask something!” Seungyoun mustered up all his courage to bring up his deep curiosity to the surface. There were only two possibilities; he might get the answer to the mystery about Wooseok, or he might not.

“Shoot.” Jaemi challenged with an unwavering confidence.

For once, Seungyoun was extra careful with his words. “What… What is your purpose? I mean, you’re a _sexual protector…_ That’s a pretty obvious title, yeah… but… why were you… _created_ in the system?” _Wooseokie didn’t have a sexual alter before, but now he has, so there must be a reason why he needs this kind of alter. Something must have happened and triggered this change._

Jaemi’s gestures were flirty even when she was only thinking. “Do I say it bluntly, or should I try and make it sound nicer to you, baby?”

That _baby_ sounded so pleasant in her smooth English, Seungyoun thought. Though somehow he believed it literally meant _child_ and not the term of endearment.

“um… Nicely blunt?” Seungyoun grimaced, bracing himself for what he was about to hear.

The way Jaemi stepped closer reminded Seungyoun of a feline, a slender black cat. It matched Wooseok’s build.

“Okay.” Jaemi tipped Seungyoun’s chin and smiled. “You see, I handle things that the kids can’t handle. Even our stronghead protector couldn’t take it anymore… So I was split off of him. What he hates, I enjoy. Is it not blunt enough? Well, let’s make a scenario to help your little brain out. Say, if Wooshinie was to be stuck in a room with you, and you were to force yourself on him, he’d hide and let me take over. He hates it and he’s taken too much of it, but… I don’t really _hate_ it. I would…” She bit her lip. “…play along.”

Seungyoun was crying. The boy who had become his beloved, treasured friend was now more _broken_ than before. How could he be fixed now? How to glue all those pieces back into one? Was there any glue strong enough for that? Seungyoun wished he could be that glue, well, not to piece together the whole thing, but maybe just some small parts, because Wooseok was valuable to him and he just wanted to take part in his healing.

For the meantime, the only thing he could try in effort to stick the broken pieces was holding them tight in his arms. When he held that body close, he could not only understand, but also _feel_ it; he wasn’t holding only one piece, but many pieces altogether. The sharp edges pricked his own heart too.

“I’m sorry for what has happened to you. You didn’t deserve all of it. I wish better times would come to you soon.”

Jaemi neither answered nor pulled away; she let Seungyoun hug her, and eventually reciprocated the warmth with a rather amorous embrace.

“You do know that I can feel hurt too.” She whispered. “I’m not all about sex.”

“I know.” Seungyoun’s lips were pulled into a bitter smile. “Thank you… for protecting the others in there, and for telling what the others can’t speak of.”

“Sure… It’s my pleasure,” Jaemi answered coyly.

Seungyoun squeezed his eyes shut and dug his teeth onto his bottom lip, trying hard to ignore the warm breath blowing on the side of his neck. Never had he imagined that one day Wooseok – well, an alter in _his_ body – would be _that_ physically close to him, acting like a thirsty vampire or such, ready to take a bite any second.

“I’m—I’m Cho Seungyoun, by the way.”

“I know you. I have some of Wooshinie’s memories too.”

“Oh, that’s good… No need for another introduction then—”

Seungyoun’s words were cut by the sound of the door next to them being opened. They were faced with another four pairs of goggling eyes.

“…”

“…”

Jaemi held Seungyoun closer and shot the other boys a smug look that conveyed something like, _Yeah, I’ve stolen your man. What are you gonna do about it?_

In that very, _very_ awkward, thick silence, only Hangyul managed to come up with a comment.

“…Wow, look who the yaoi guy is now.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That was pretty damn long, wasn't it? and the trip wasn't even over yet. The rest of it will be on the next chapter. Make sure not to skip the next chapter because there will be an important scene that will affect the following chapters! You can also expect to see something sweet :) Wooseok was mainly in charge here, but it's Wooshin's turn next. I've had the rest of the story planned out, so please wait for the next updates, and thank you for still reading this story! Once again, let's give Wooseok's solo lots of love and support ♡


	18. Chapter 18

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm sorry for taking forever to update, but here's a super long chapter to make up for it! Enjoy :)

* * *

An urgent meeting was called for. Five students sat together over freshly-made breakfast, all hunching forward and speaking in voices that were no louder than panicked whispers.

“No way! He has another female inside him?!” Yeonwoo’s drowsy eyes popped open wide at the three boys – Seungyoun, Yohan, and Hangyul – who had just broken the news.

“Yes, and an adult woman at that.” Seungyoun winced recalling all the chaos that had unfolded the night before. “From what she told us last night, she’s twenty five. A mixed race, Korean-American… She wanted us to call her Jaemi. You know… _fun._ ”

“Her English was so good,” Hangyul said, “so good that I didn’t understand a single word.”

Next to Yeonwoo, the speechless Jinhee had her head clutched in her hands. It wasn’t that she was too taken aback; in fact, it was quite the contrary. She had read and watched enough DID contents to know about various types of alters, including the type Jaemi was. It totally made sense that a sexually abused person with DID would have a sexual protector, but this whole new alter’s existence became the final and absolute confirmation of her horrific presumption – that Wooseok’s uncle still abused him, not only by beating him up, but also in other ways a sane human would never think of doing. Jinhee hated that her bad feeling was right. She remembered, the first time Wooseok had stayed at her place, he had told her that his uncle had stopped touching him inappropriately since had been busier with his job. But apparently now the monster was back at it again.

_How bad is it that Wooshin alone isn’t enough to protect him?_

The more she thought about it, fresh beads of tears gave themselves the permission to escape the corners of her eyes and fall onto the wooden table, yet she bowed her head deep to hide the wet trails on her cheeks. Though, everyone at the table knew really well who was shattered the most by the news.

“Oh, Jinny…” Yeonwoo enveloped her sisterlike buddy in a firm embrace. “We can’t do much, can we? Let’s make sure he’s happy out here, in this short while.”

Yohan, who had finished his food first, flew his gaze outside towards the very subject of their discussion. The oblivious Wooseok was distancing himself from everybody else again, standing like a welcome statue, staring blankly at the sea. Actually, none of them could be sure if it was really Wooseok or another alter. Just like Wooseok himself, suddenly they felt like they didn’t really know his alter system that much after all.

“I’ll go check on him,” Yohan said, getting up. His heartbeat picked up its pace for no clear reasons – perhaps the previous night’s nose smooch had left a little mental scar.

“Be careful, he might jump on you and kiss you to show the world that you belong to him.” Hangyul snickered with full cheeks.

“Don’t say stupid things like that!” Yohan whined and laughed as he walked away.

Stopping next to Wooseok, Yohan cleared his throat and greeted, “Hi. Have you had breakfast?”

Awkward silence fell upon them, both boys gazing at the horizon.

“…Hey?” Yohan tried again. _Didn’t he hear me?_ He thought, confused.

This time, Wooseok sighed. “I heard that we’re leaving this place soon. Is that true?”

_Oh, no. This is not Wooseok… Then who am I talking to??_ Yohan began to panic. _That is definitely not a female voice… Right??_

“U-Um, yeah. We still have fifteen minutes.” Yohan stole glances at his friends, who were watching over them from the distance.

“Fifteen minutes?” The other boy placed his hands on his hips and straightened his back.“Then, I shall make use of it to the fullest.”

“Huh? What—”

Yohan’s question was cut off as suddenly Wooseok ran towards the sandy area, in a ninja style with his arms stretched out behind him, threw his shoes and socks off, and proceeded to run about barefoot while yelling at the top of his lungs.

“HAAAAAAHHH! This is great!!”

The group of friends rushed from their table to join the baffled Yohan, gawking at the sight of Wooseok laughing and having the time of his life alone by the shore. That laugh was not a shy, restrained small giggle, but a full hearty laugh that showed off his nice set of teeth, which were seldom seen by anyone. He seemed so joyful and carefree, just like a young boy who had no burden in the world.

“Is it Woo?” Jinhee asked. The said child alter hadn’t showed up in public ever since Wooseok had left her home, she had been concerned about him.

“I-I don’t think so… He doesn’t sound like a kid,” Yohan said. “The voice isn’t as deep as Wooseok’s and Wooshin’s, but still a guy’s voice… I think?”

Unsure what to do, the bewildered group of teens remained standing there until the boy returned to them on his own, already intact with his socks and shoes on as if nothing had happened. The only difference between the before and after was the beam that was then plastered on his face.

“That was a good release. Are we leaving now?” The boy raised his eyebrows at the other teens. Getting no immediate answers, he slapped his own forehead. “Oh, sorry, that’s rude of me.” He chuckled before bowing ninety degrees in a sudden whip. “Hello, I’m Yoo Taejun, the new caretaker of the system! I like kids and animals.”

Everyone gasped. In less than twelve hours, two new alters had showed up and introduced themselves, both fully aware of who they were and what their own roles were in Wooseok’s system. These two were the first who weren’t lost and disoriented upon coming to life and meeting people for the first time. Unlike Doyeon, who still had no idea what purpose she had, the two newcomers put the labels on themselves – a _sexual protector_ and a _caretaker_ – saved everyone from trying to figure out what they were.

“Do you… perhaps know Bae Jaemi, by any chance?” Seungyoun asked.

Unexpectedly, Taejun snorted and chuckled in a sarcastic manner, placing his hand on his hip and shaking his head. “That’s not her real name. It’s Eugene. Bae Yoojin. She thinks she’s fun enough to change her name…” Taejun clicked his tongue, his lips forming a bitter smile. “There have been just a couple of major episodes with her in charge, both were chaotic, I suppose. One time I was close to the front for a short moment when she was about to get in action. This wasn’t too long ago. Because I found out what she did, she had no choice but to speak to me. Nobody else knows what she really does yet. Well… she doesn’t let me know too much about her either, but at least I know she finds some things fun when the rest of us don’t. Saves us from the nastier stuff.”

Taejun remained with the group until they got on one of the two shuttle buses that took them to the other part of the island – the campground in the woods. They learned that he had split off of Woo, surprisingly, as the child alter had gone through too much stress in the system that he could no longer function as a gatekeeper – a responsibility that was too big for a child to begin with. Upon the split, Taejun had obtained some of Woo’s memories, and somehow Woo himself had retrogressed to an earlier point of childhood – no longer an eight-year-old boy, but a brand new six-year-old, a pure child with no duties. Therefore, a whole new alter was broken off to take care of the messed up system, especially the kid who was then hiding deep inside with his mental father. Yoo Taejun was neither a kid like Woo nor a true adult like Bae Yoojin, he was in between, a nineteen-year-old boy who was both mature and child-like at times. As a male, he was quite a talkative one, and especially gentle and nurturing, others could see from the way he spoke of other alters.

“Ah, things have been so screwed up for us lately.” Taejun sighed, gazing out the window of the bus. He was sitting at the back, talking to the group – a super rare sight that evoked curiosity among other students. “Baby Woo is still upset about his toys. It’s all because of Wooseok’s uncle. That man was creeped out to see Woo fronting once, and he thought throwing away all his toys would fix the problem? Yeah, great idea because now Woo is too busy being sad to come out.” He rolled his eyes. “Don’t worry, I’ve been trying to cheer him up. He listens to me well. Ah, Wooshin can hear me too… but I’m dying to know why I can’t reach Wooseok. He should know I’m here to comfort him.”

“Maybe it takes time,” Jinhee said, “but he should open up to you eventually… right? If he can’t have friends in the outside world, at least he can have one inside. I’m… just glad he has a caretaker now.”

Taejun tore his gaze off the rows of trees flashing by outside the bus’ window and his gentle eyes fell on Jinhee, who was sitting in front of him, looking back at him with an expectant puppy face. She could hardly believe that she was having a proper conversation with Wooseok – well, not really Wooseok himself, but it was physically _him_.

But then Taejun’s gaze faltered as he seemed to contemplate.

“…You know, you’re also the source of our system’s emotional distress,” Taejun murmured, just to mask it immediately with a smile. “But not really _you_. It’s not like it was you who created the problem. Just… I’m going to be in trouble for saying this, but I think the other _guys_ really miss you.”

By _guys,_ he meant Wooshin and Wooseok, and the group of friends understood that well.

Taejun shifted in his seat uncomfortably and looked back outside. “I heard Wooshin saying that,” he mumbled. Then he zoned out for a brief while, and blinked multiple times in a slightly disoriented state upon feeling another presence trying to take over. “Okay, he’s coming to get me. I knew I was going to be in trouble.”

“He who? Wooshinie?” Seungyoun asked next to him, looking a little too excited.

Taejun nodded and rubbed his eyes. “Ah, I can’t fight him back— This is too short, but nice to meet you guys.” He chuckled.

The bus ride didn’t last longer than fifteen minutes. It wasn’t that big of an island after all. The moment everyone got off and entered the camping area, Taejun was no longer with them. By how he slung his backpack over one shoulder and narrowed his eyes at Seungyoun, who was standing so close to him, they knew their dear friend Wooshin had come to take his turn.

“Move.” He commanded Seungyoun. The cold deep voice made the taller boy flinch and quickly move aside to make way, even bowing like a humble servant as Wooshin walked through and left the group.

“Well, that’s familiar.” Seungyoun chuckled. The others shrugged.

Jinhee let Wooshin out of her watch as she observed her surroundings. The campground was much bigger than she had expected; after having gone through narrow roads surrounded by towering trees along the way, they found themselves entering a humongous open field, where colorful tents of various sizes were set up in neat rows, with distance between one another comfortable enough for personal space. Further at the back of the site, the tents were arranged forming several layers of a big circle, with an open space for a bonfire in the middle. The first layer of circle closest to the bonfire were the smallest, individual tents, and the rest behind them were tents for two. This area was where they were staying that day.

“Later when it gets dark out here, the teachers won’t be able to watch everyone. Six versus eighty-four. It’s impossible,” Hangyul said. “Let’s get naughty tonight.”

“What are you going to do? Explore the woods and feed yourself to the wolves?” Yohan remarked nonchalantly while peeking into the tents.

“That’s stupid, there are no wolves out here.” Hangyul fell silent and eyed the dense trees behind their campsite. “Are there?”

The teachers gathered the excited students in the middle of the open space for a brief instruction.

“Do you still remember your roommates back at the villa?” a young, handsome male teacher asked at the front. “There were rooms of four, six, and eight. You are now free to choose any of your roommates to share your tents with. The tents on the right side are for the boys, and the left side for the girls. You are NOT allowed to share a tent with opposite gender. I know what you kids are thinking, even though you think we won’t be able to watch each of you at night, we’ll somehow find out if you pull a stunt. There will be consequences, so please behave and control yourselves. Six of these individual tents closest to where we’re standing now are for us teachers, you can come whenever you need anything or if you don’t feel well. Any questions? If none, please pick your tents and drop your belongings, then get back straight here so we can start exploring. You have ten minutes to get ready.”

“Wooshinie!” Seungyoun called as soon as they were dismissed. The other boy was standing meters away, pretending not to hear his loud voice. Seungyoun slipped through the crowd swiftly and caught Wooshin by the shoulder before he could walk away. “Wooshinie, let’s share a tent! We were roommates at the villa!”

Wooshin sighed and rolled his eyes. “I’d rather get lost and sleep alone in a cave.”

Seungyoun responded with a grin. “You don’t mean that.” And he grabbed the other’s wrist, dragging him running towards a random light blue tent in the last, outer layer, farthest from the teachers’ tents and close to the white line on the ground that marked the border between the male and female areas. Just two tents away on the left was Yeonwoo and Jinhee’s yellow tent.

“Woahhh it’s so comfy!” Seungyoun giggled as he tossed himself onto the sleeping pads inside the tent, rolling around like a puppy, while Wooshin stood outside and watched him with a stoic face. Late to notice the cold eyes peering at him, Seungyoun chuckled, pulled himself together and brushed the sleeping pad next to him with his hand, as if he had left unwanted dirt on a prince’s bed.

“There you go, Your Highness, all nice and clean.” Seungyoun flashed an innocent smile.

Only after rolling his eyes once again did Wooshin enter the small space, ever so half-heartedly. It was the fact that he wasn’t any closer to the other roommates that gave him no choice but to give in to this giggly giant moron, as what he’d call him. At least, they were not going to spend most of the day together, since they were in two different groups.

Meanwhile, Jinhee was peeking from her tent. She turned and cocked an eyebrow at Yeonwoo. “How are we so close to their tent? Let me guess, you and Seungyoun planned this.”

“That, and luck.” Yeonwoo gave a cheeky grin. “What? Of course plans would be just plans without luck out here in the wild! You’ve got to learn from us, Jinny. Teachers don’t give us romantic moments, we make those moments ourselves.”

Jinhee couldn’t help but laugh and shake her head at her friend’s smug smile. “They’ll somehow find out if you ‘pull a stunt’.”

“Oh, it won’t be a _stunt_ … Just some stargazing and chill.” Yeonwoo wiggled her eyebrows. “Let’s go before the teachers blast a siren in our ears again.”

As if exchanging partners, Jinhee went to Seungyoun and Yeonwoo to Wooshin when they were told to get in their predetermined groups. They departed in the opposite directions and began their tour around the woods.

“I saw that your tents were close to each other,” Yohan said as soon as he joined Jinhee and Seungyoun, walking together.

“We were just lucky.” Seungyoun laughed. “Nah, I wasn’t fast enough. There was an occupied tent between us. Why is your tent so far away, though? That’s not fun!”

“Where is it?” Jinhee asked out of genuine curiosity. “Are you sharing with Hangyul?”

“Yup, it’s also on the outer side… but, like, a dozen tents away from yours.” Yohan smiled and rubbed his nape sheepishly. “That’s too bad.”

“Why too bad? It’s not like you can spend the night in her tent even if you’re close by,” Seungyoun teased, turning Yohan into an adorable stuttering mess. Jinhee laughed noticing how fast his ears reddened.

“There is a beautiful waterfall ahead,” the guide – a man in a uniform maroon shirt – said, “the water is fresh and clean, you can see many fish swimming about! We will stop there soon, you can take pictures and soak your feet in the water if you’d like!”

“Wow.” Mesmerized by the view that was slowly being unveiled behind the trees as they were nearing the waterfall, Jinhee didn’t watch her way and tripped on a big rock. “W-Whoa!”

“Watch out!” In a swift, unison move, both Seungyoun and Yohan caught her by the arms on each side. The group stopped walking and all eyes turned to them out of concern.

“Is everything alright?” a teacher asked.

“Yes, Sir, we’re alright!” Seungyoun answered. After asking everyone to be careful, the guide continued leading the way.

“Thanks, you both saved me from the embarrassment.” Jinhee laughed and thanked the boys with a bright genuine smile, showing her dimples.

Yohan blushed, while Seungyoun had his mind fly to the other side of the woods. He couldn’t help but worry about his own girl, knowing how clumsy she could be.

_Hangyul and Wooshinie are there… They should be enough to protect her, right? …Why do I feel bad about this?_

He stared at the blue and orange string bracelet around his wrist – his treasured couple item that was identical to Yeonwoo’s – and, in his heart, wished for everyone’s safety.

Meanwhile, Yeonwoo was giggling all the way because of the little animals she spotted here and there. “Squirrels! Ahh, they’re so cute! Man, this almost feels like we’re Disney princesses walking through the forest. Should we sing and twirl around?”

“Please don’t.” Hangyul covered his ears and cringed to tease the girl.

They were walking behind everybody else, except two others behind them; their teacher and none other than Wooshin. Yeonwoo was as bubbly as she always was on normal school days, Wooshin noticed. To tell the truth, just the sight of her gave him mixed feelings; this girl was like Han Seungwoo with softer feminine features, but with Seungyoun’s personality. The Han Seungwoo resemblance scared him at times, yet the Cho Seungyoun warmth enabled him to relax around her – except for the times when he secretly had random flashbacks caused by her mere voice. Like right now, while they were walking uphill on a narrow path, scissoring through the peaceful woods. The cheerful chirps of the birds above their heads were fading in his ears, replaced by a voice of a thirteen-year-old girl screaming out a particular name. It was like an endless, looping nightmare to him.

He had settled the problem with Jinhee, he knew she had forgiven him, and yet, why did Yeonwoo’s voice from that day still haunt him to no end?

More flashbacks came flooding in; of when he had first entered senior high, when he had run into Yeonwoo and Jinhee on the first day, when he had pretended not to know them, just as how they hadn’t known him back then; and when he had spent months walking back and forth outside Jinhee’s classroom throughout the freshman year. He was sure that Yeonwoo, Yohan, and Hangyul had seen him a lot – perhaps it was just that he had been nearly invisible to them because of how insignificant he had been. Compared to those three, Jinhee hadn’t come out often during recess, due to the rumors revolving around her and Seungwoo – not because she had been afraid of being talked about, but because she had avoided running into the loud, cuddly big boy and being put in the center of attention. Wooshin had observed her more than enough to know about that. Call him a creepy stalker, he didn’t give a damn.

Perhaps his crush on her had developed much earlier before she was even aware of his existence. It had started off with guilt, and had ended up with love.

_It’s still love, damn it._

Wooshin squeezed his eyes shut and shook his head hard. He despised being overly melancholic and sappy because of that stupid thing called _love,_ yet he just couldn’t help it.

The path ahead eventually went steeper and their feet felt heavier. Yeonwoo was walking like an elderly, and several couples of feet ahead, Hangyul was pretending to pull her with an invisible rope. At this point, even Wooshin was no longer behind them.

“Gosh! Do I have an option to give up?” Yeonwoo wheezed. “Free me from this torture, please, I wouldn’t mind rolling my way back down to the campground alone.”

“It’s only been twenty minutes, young lady,” the middle-aged male teacher at the back commented, chuckling. “Hiking is a good exercise for you. Keep it up! We’re coming to a stop soon.”

“How are you so fit, teacher Lee? I think our souls are switched. You should be in a seventeen-year-old’s body.” Yeonwoo continued to complain along the way, making the teacher laugh. But she was easily distracted anyway; her whines stopped completely as soon as they passed by an area with lots of purple and white wildflowers.

“How pretty! Can I pick some?” She bent down and started plucking out the flowers, not really waiting for the permission. “I’m going to give these to Seungyounie. Too bad they’re not blue and orange, but purple and white are pretty too.”

Wooshin snorted and rolled his eyes. _Cheesy couple crap._ Then he glanced ever so hesitantly at the flowers. They were swaying back and forth, dancing along with the soft breeze, looking like they were waving at him.

_Would she like them too?_

Wooshin tried to recall what Jinhee’s favorite colors were. _Is it blue? She has many clothes in light blue. Pink? Nah, not just pink… The stuff in her room was mostly pink, white, and purple. These flowers are white and purple. That should do, right?_

Without even knowing if he would ever give those flowers to his love, Wooshin picked one flower of each color and looked at them closely, making sure they were in good condition.

“Look, he picked some flowers too,” Hangyul said to Yeonwoo, pointing his thumb at Wooshin. “The cold guy can be sweet too, huh?”

“Whoa! Who could be the lucky girl??” Yeonwoo let out a loud gasp, pretending to be utterly shocked. “Could it be…”

“None.” Wooshin deadpanned, discreetly shoving the flowers into his pocket. “Just wanted to take a closer look. And it’s none of your business.”

The cold boy continued to walk without sparing a glance at the snickering duo behind him, oblivious to his own flushed ears.

They passed by a few local houses, lone wooden cabins that stood in the middle of the woods. Further uphill was a paintball arena, but that wasn’t where they were heading to, much to Hangyul’s disappointment. Instead, they took a turn towards the aerial games area. A yell could be heard approaching from above in the distance – they looked up and found a guy hanging and sliding fast down a very long zip line, from the top of a tall tower all the way to the ground. Not far away, there were a couple trying to move from one tree to another by walking on a narrow piece of wood – a part of an aerial trek that they were soon going to play on, plus several other outdoor games around the place.

Wooshin’s hidden wild, adventurous side jumped at the sight of the whole adrenaline-pumping arena presented in front of him, yet a sudden realization occurred to his mind and made him click his tongue in disapproval.

_She’s afraid of heights. She’s not gonna enjoy this._

On the other side, Jinhee had her bare feet dunked in a shallow river, bending down to catch some fish with her hands, together with Yohan and several other students. The rest of them were either sitting around or going rafting nearby. Just a while before, they had played a game to decide who could go to the rafting spot. Seungyoun was one of the lucky ones. Though, both Jinhee and Yohan thought they were more content like this, having their own fun in the peace and comfort of nature.

It was actually a chance given by the teachers for them to start creating something and make use of the beautiful view around them, before they moved on to the next stop. Jinhee thought snapping several photos should be enough as references. Perhaps she had grown more melancholic through the past few months; she’d rather use the short time to get lost in her own thoughts and feelings. Once she had come out of the water, put her shoes back on and sat on the grass, under a shady tree, she was quick to zone out.

_What could he be doing right now? Which alter is in control? Maybe still Wooshin? I hope they’re having a good time… Everyone inside him._

She sighed. Would it be too much to hope for at least a small interaction before they had to go home the next day? They were not going to see each other anymore for weeks, until summer break ended.

_I’m going to miss you… Not that I haven’t been missing you already._

Jinhee shook her head and blinked herself back to her senses. She hated being so gloomy because of this thing called _love_ , yet she just couldn’t help it.

“What’s the matter?” Yohan came and sat by her side, noticing the grey cloud ghosting over her face when everything and everyone else were bright and sunny.

“Nothing.” Jinhee smiled, a sweet yet unconvincing one.

Yohan didn’t buy it. He leaned back and stared at the gushing waterfall, a distant smile gracing his lips as he exhaled a soft sigh.

“Imagine being on her mind 24/7,” Yohan murmured to himself, “can’t relate.”

Jinhee blinked in confusion. “Huh?”

“No, you see,” Yohan cleared his throat and sat up straight, speaking louder now, “I just think that you should enjoy your time here, since we’re going back home tomorrow. If something – or someone – keeps bugging your mind, shouldn’t you push that aside for now and save that for later? You’ll miss out on little things going on around you.”

Just then did Jinhee notice that Yohan had a small wildflower tucked on his ear, even though she had been looking at him the whole time. The boy shyly took the flower and handed it to her. The petals were long and white, and the center was bright yellow – identical to many others surrounding them.

“It’s a chamomile flower,” Yohan said, smiling bashfully, “I know because my mother likes flowers, and chamomile tea.”

Jinhee twirled the flower between her fingers, observing it up close, then took in its scent. “It’s small and simple, but it’s pretty. It smells kind of sweet too.”

“Just like happiness, isn’t it?” Yohan’s gaze on the other was as tender as his voice. “It doesn’t always take a special, eventful moment for you to be happy. Happiness… It’s also in small and simple things, but it’s still a pretty and sweet feeling anyway… You wouldn’t want to miss it.”

Now, Jinhee was curious. “Are you perfectly happy now, Yohan?”

The other didn’t answer straight away, yet his smile remained on his lips as he toyed with his shoelaces. “Well… Perfect happiness can only be found in heaven, don’t you think? There are still burdens, like our summer homework.” They both laughed. “But, seriously,” he continued, “now I think happiness is also a choice. There are things that can make me sad if I think about them, but since I choose not to think about them, I can only focus on what makes me happy. Like… just sitting here and talking with you. Giving you a random wildflower. It’s not hard to make me happy, is it?”

Jinhee felt a little crushed inside by the pure, carefree, yet somewhat sad tone. _He’s the sweetest, how could I keep hurting him?_ She thought. People who didn’t know their story would say that she was dumb for turning her back to him, a boy who was shining the brightest in his teenage years, who had even been her major crush for a year, and choosing to run after a boy with a mental disorder. Yet, could she put herself against her own heart? Love would always decide its own way.

_I’m sorry, Yohan…_

What she could give him was nothing more than a sincere, apologetic smile.

“I wouldn’t mind talking more with you, and getting more random flowers from you. You can do that if it makes you happy. I’m a good friend, aren’t I?”

“Yes you are, Cha Jinhee. You’re the best.”

The day flew by quickly when they jumped into the fun part, playing around the game arenas spread out in the woods. At one point, the two groups of students crossed path in the middle of their routes. Seungyoun and Yeonwoo didn’t spoil the chance to yell each other’s name and throw flying hearts at each other, and, of course, another awkward eye contact had to occur between Jinhee and Wooshin. The latter turned his head away so fast, shoving his hands into his pockets, trying his best to keep his cool. At that typical reaction of his, Jinhee breathed out a long, dejected sigh.

“Jinhee, look, there’s an archery spot over there!” Yohan said, touching the girl’s shoulder in attempt to distract her. “Ah, too bad it’s not on our activity list... Have you tried it before?”

“No… No, I haven’t.” Jinhee shook her head, pulling herself out of her trance. She couldn’t express how much she appreciated Yohan’s continuous attempts to brighten her mood along the way.

As they were nearing the end of their tour, Wooshin and his group stopped by the waterfall near where Jinhee and Yohan had sat together earlier. They also played a game to decide who could go rafting in the river. Hangyul went away with the other lucky students, while the rest stayed around to take pictures and find some inspiration for their homework.

“Ahh, I don’t want to stay here!” Yeonwoo complained as Hangyul walked away, looking back just to shoot her the most annoying mocking face. She quickly searched for their teacher and the guides. “Excuse me, is there a spot to watch the rafting? Can I go and watch them? Maybe I can find some inspiration there!”

Her questions evoked some interest; three bored male students who had overheard her came to see if they were allowed to go. Sitting not too far away on the grass, Wooshin was zoning out, staring into empty space, having absolute zero interest in everything going on around him. While the teacher was discussing with the guides, Yeonwoo noticed the lone boy and got an idea.

“It’s very near by, my partner can take them there if you’d like. There are our staff too on the spot. It won’t be problem,” said one of the guides, a male one who seemed like a senior staff, gesturing towards the other guide, a young female in her early twenties. Her bright smile somehow seemed both confident and nervous.

The female teacher was doubtful. “Ah, there are only four of you who want to go?”

“Five!” Yeonwoo said, suddenly pointing in Wooshin’s direction. “He will go too, if we can go.”

Feeling the eyes on him, the clueless Wooshin turned his head slowly and blinked his drowsy eyes at them.

The teacher then sighed in defeat. “Very well then. But please stick close to the guides. Since I have to stay with the other students here, I cannot watch over you. Please get back straight here once you’ve watched enough.”

“Yes! Thank you, ma’am!” Yeonwoo saluted the teacher, who responded with an eyeroll and a smile. Yeonwoo’s high ponytail bounced side to side as she skipped her way to Wooshin, giggling so happily, while the boy seemed unamused by what was about to come.

‘Wooshinie, let’s go!”

“No—”

Did he even have an option? Once Yeonwoo yanked his wrist and pulled him onto his feet with a shocking power, Wooshin surrendered completely. He didn’t feel like fighting this female version of Seungyoun-Seungwoo at the moment.

So there he was, tailing her around like a robot, with his hands in his pockets. They watched from another game spot on a higher ground, so they could look down and get a clearer view of the river. Strong current was rushing down the sloping terrain, and their friends’ boat was bouncing violently, looking like it could flip upside down any second. Everyone on board was wearing life vests.

“Whoa…” Yeonwoo gulped and held her chest. “Glad I’m not on that boat.”

Contrary to her usual loud, adventurous self, her softer tone made her seem rather cowardly instead, catching even Wooshin’s attention.

_Thought you would jump down there._ Wooshin snorted.

Once the boat had gone further out of their sight, the guide led the five back to where they had come from, going downhill and crossing a bridge that stretched over the river.

“It’s a long river, isn’t it?” Yeonwoo commented, looking down as they walked. “But the current in this part isn’t as extreme as the lower area that we saw earlier.”

“Yes, that’s right!” The young guide answered with a professional excitement that sounded as if she had practiced her tone over and over. “It is because the land around this area is not as inclined as the lower area.”

“Oh, that makes sense.” Yeonwoo nodded.

Just for a couple of seconds, she seemed to be lost in her thoughts, until her couple string bracelet got caught on a protruding nail on the end of the wooden bridge and snapped. It fell and she kicked it further away by accident, sending it all the way down onto the steep ground on the side of the bridge.

“Oh, no! My bracelet!” Instinctively, Yeonwoo rushed down to the side, with only the blue and orange bracelet on her mind. The guide looked back and let out a sharp gasp.

“Miss, please don’t go there! It’s dangerous, come back, please! You could slip and fall into the river!” the young woman did little jumps and waved her hands in panic, losing her composure. Wooshin cocked an eyebrow at her, until she decided to run after the high school girl.

After careful steps down the somewhat slippery ground, Yeonwoo bent down and picked up her blue and orange bracelet. “I got it!” She held it up showing it to the guide and beamed as she took a step forward. “See, I got it—W-Whoa!”

The guide’s shriek broke along with a loud splash. It took a couple of blinks for Wooshin to process what was happening. As soon as he was on full alert, seeing Yeonwoo flail her arms for help, the protector alter didn’t hesitate one second to run and launch himself into the water.

“What do I do?? I’m new, I’m not trained for this scenario yet!” The guide was so close to bursting into tears at the sight of the two students being carried further away by the flow.

“Hurry and contact someone!” one of the three boys left said with a scolding tone. He asked the other two, “Should we help them too?”

The other two looked at each other wide-eyed. “I’m not throwing myself in there,” said one of them, “the current is pretty strong.”

“Me too. I can’t swim,” the other one said. “Look, that guy seems like a good swimmer. He should be able to help, right?”

The guide moved aside and spoke to another guide through her earpiece. Perhaps afraid of getting scolded, instead of reporting to her senior at the waterfall, she reached out to the guide leading the other group – a young male, but much more experienced than her. “Yes, two students! One female student slipped into the river, and one male jumped in to save her! Their names are…” she checked her small note that she had quickly scribbled before leaving. “Han Yeonwoo and Kim Wooseok.”

She fell silent listening attentively to the instructions from the person on the other end, nodding a few times while trying to calm herself down. The young guide then turned back to the three students, this time a tad more composed. “The rafting staff will go and save them. Your friends should be okay, but we are asked to go to the rafting spot to fetch them there. Now, the other group have just finished their activities. Instead of heading back to the campground, they are taking shortcuts to the rafting spot as well, at your teacher’s request. We will go back together.”

Meanwhile, the said other group was shaken by the news. Especially Seungyoun and Jinhee.

“I knew it, I had a bad feeling about this!” Seungyoun whined, trying his absolute best not to cry. Wrapping an arm around him, Yohan had his eyes on the girl walking ahead of them instead. Unlike Seungyoun, who was in a very obvious panic mode, Jinhee seemed rather calm and quiet. But he knew she was in no better state than Seungyoun deep inside.

_Is it really Wooseok who’s trying to save Yeonwoo?_ Jinhee thought. _It could be still Wooshin… Ah, either way, I shouldn’t worry, right? Both Wooseok and Wooshin are good swimmers. I know he can save Yeonwoo and himself, I know they’ll be okay… Right?_

Jinhee tried to assure herself more by summoning her memory of swimming together with Wooshin, at his uncle’s house. Wooshin had won the swimming race back then, which had led to her taking her clothes off.

_He can swim like a dolphin. He’s good at it,_ she thought. _Please save them… Gosh, please save them._

Wooshin thought so too; he was confident that he was as good as a fish. But things were way harder for him when the person he had to save was unintentionally trying to drown him out of panic, submerging his head into the water time and time again. They were both gasping for air and swallowing a lot of water.

“H-Help! I can’t swim!” Yeonwoo held onto Wooshin’s shoulders with all her life and struggled to pull herself up, which caused the other to go back down into the water. Wooshin was starting to lose himself. Holding in his breath in his cheeks, he moved to Yeonwoo’s back and wrapped an arm around her body from behind.

“Y-Your arm—Your arm is touching my boobs!” the girl still managed to yell out a complaint.

“Shut up or I’ll pull you by the hair. I’m not gonna die here with you.” Wooshin could see big rocks ahead. With his free hand, he tried his best to grab hold of any of them – he caught one, and slipped, caught another one, and slipped again. The next time he tried, there were three hands grasping the rock. And they stopped there, at last.

“…Finally you can make use of those hands, huh?” Wooshin panted heavily, his eyes almost hidden behind his wet hair. The water was still endlessly crashing onto their bodies.

“I’m sorry.” The mewl that slipped out Yeonwoo’s quivering lips brought Wooshin’s attention to her eyes – her face was wet not just with the water in the river, but also with her own tears. “I’m sorry.”

The exhausted boy softened a little. “Where’s the bracelet?”

“I lost it.” Yeonwoo’s lips trembled harder.

“This is not worth it.” Wooshin grumbled. “Dumb couple and their dumb couple stuff. Dumb love makes people dumb.”

“If I must die today,” Yeonwoo said between her little sniffles, “I’ll tell you now that love is not dumb. It’s me who’s dumb. Love is worth it, and Cha Jinhee still loves you so much… Hang on for her… not only in this river, but also in your life.”

Wooshin averted his gaze away, because the sting in his heart nearly brought his tears out. “Shut up, you’re too dramatic. No one’s dying here. It’d be easy to save you and my own ass if I wasn’t this tired.”

Upon saying that, his ears caught a faint sound of a man’s yell in the distance. He was so relieved that he felt like passing out.

But instead, Yeonwoo was the one who blacked out before the staff could reach them.

The closer Jinhee got to the rafting spot, the louder her heart beat. In what kind of condition would Yeonwoo and Wooshin be when they met again? Seungyoun was wondering the same, he had been questioning that out loud all the way.

They didn’t have to wonder any longer; before they reached the very spot, they could see the two and several staff below from the higher ground where they were standing. Seungyoun gasped at the sight.

“Han Yeonwoo!!” he cried at the top of his lungs, then turned to shake Yohan violently, his cheeks already wet with tears. “She’s not dead, is she? Is she??”

“Ah, ow—I don’t know! Let’s hope not!” Yohan winced in pain due to how hard Seungyoun was squeezing his arms.

At that moment, Wooshin lifted his head, and his gaze fell straight on the only person he had been thinking of while holding onto the rock and clutching the unconscious girl with all his life. He could barely see her face, because she was covering it with her hands to muffle her sobs. He couln’t tell whether she was crying out of worry for Yeonwoo, or crying relieved tears to see that he was still standing on his feet, even though he was panting hard and drenched from head to toe.

Even when Seungyoun ran to check Yeonwoo’s condition together with the paramedic staff, Jinhee and Wooshin were pinned to their spots, and even when the chance was open wide for them to interact on the way back to the campground, the huge distance between them remained, for there was an invisible wall that had long been built, separating them, even though their hearts were desperately reaching out for each other.

Jinhee returned to her tent alone, and Wooshin went away to wash up. The paramedic team had asked him to go with them and Yeonwoo, to make sure he was going to be alright, yet he had insisted that he was perfectly fine. Other than his hurting nose and his lightly shivering exhausted body, there were no other problems, so the boy just wanted to be left alone.

Peeking from her tent, Jinhee watched him leave and sighed. Her lips puckered into a pout as she lazily grabbed some fresh clothes out her bag, getting ready to freshen up as well.

“We should talk… shouldn’t we?” she started a monologue, mumbling to herself. “This trip can’t pass just like that. I should at least thank him for saving Yeonwoo… and maybe ask if he’s okay. Would that be too much interaction for him? He may walk away, though. It’s going to be super awkward. But we’re awkward on a daily basis, so what’s new? I’ve got no more dignity left. So what if he turns his back on me again? I’m thick-skinned enough to deal with that rejection now. All thanks to him.”

“Cha Jinhee!!”

“Hyah!!” Jinhee bounced a little on her bottom and threw everything she was holding as soon as a head popped out at her tent’s entrance. Cho Seungyoun had come with his volume-boosted voice and his cheshire grin.

“Could you please not shock me like that? Thank you!” Jinhee hit the boy square on the face with her towel. She clutched her chest and exhaled loudly seeing her messy toiletries. At least Seungyoun was smiling – possibly a very good sign.

“Sorry,” Seungyoun giggled. “Yeonwoo is awake! She needs her clean clothes and all the bathing stuff.”

“She is? Oh, thank goodness!” a beam instantly brightened her gloomy face. Digging into Yeonwoo’s bag, she asked, “Can I go and see her too?”

“You can see her once she’s clean,” Seungyoun said, taking the stuff Jinhee was passing to him. “She’s about to take a shower now. A hot shower! Isn’t that unfair?? She gets to have a hot shower, but we don’t! We’d better wash up soon before the water gets colder.”

Jinhee chuckled noticing that the boy’s childishness was back. Perhaps she really should stop worrying now.

“Where did Wooshinie go anyway? He’s not in our tent,” Seungyoun said, standing straight to fly his gaze around. “Is he showering too?”

“Yup.” Jinhee contemplated telling Seungyoun about trying to talk to Wooshin again. Maybe he would have something ridiculous yet somehow wise to say about that.

_Nope. He has to go back to Yeonwoo real quick._ Jinhee came out her tent and handed the rest of Yeonwoo’s stuff to the boyfriend. “Hurry up, don’t make her wait.”

“Alright, thanks, Jinhee!” Seungyoun flashed a bright smile. “If you see Wooshinie, can you say a quick thanks to him for me? I’ll thank him properly later. Then, after saying thanks, maybe you two can talk about something else.”

Seungyoun’s mischievous grin was an obvious sign that he knew what she was thinking. Jinhee gave him a playful slap on the arm before he ran away laughing.

Yet, even though Seungyoun had kindly given her a good reason to talk to Wooshin, she didn’t see him anywhere until it was about time to gather up again. He was wearing the same clothes as Wooseok had worn the night before; a black shirt and a black pair of training pants. Seungyoun gave him a fifteen-minute-long thank you speech before finally releasing him out their tent.

“Wait, wait! Do you feel cold?” Even after they had come out, Seungyoun still held the other boy from walking away. Wooshin’s face was completely blank and emotionless, yet he was losing his patience inside. “I have a clean hoodie. I brought it because I thought it might get colder out here at night, but I don’t think I need it. You wear it, alright? You’ve got to stay warm. Actually, you know what, I’ll ask the teachers if they have some hot tea for you.”

_How can a human talk this much?_ Wooshin was both irritated and impressed.

And so, he ended up sitting with a cup of hot ginger tea in his hand, wearing Seungyoun’s pale grey baggy hoodie, trapped between the owner of the said hoodie and the hungry Lee Hangyul. They all sat together in a big circle, surrounding the ignited bonfire, waiting for their dinner rather impatiently.

“Where’s the food? I’m starving!” Hangyul complained. Next to him, Yohan was secretly stuffing his mouth with his own potato chips that he had brought from home. It wasn’t that he didn’t want to share, but once Hangyul saw the snack, he would pour the whole thing into his big mouth for sure.

Just a moment later, Jinhee and Yeonwoo came from their tent, only after the former had made sure that her dear friend was warm enough. Yeonwoo had long finished the same beverage as what Wooshin was struggling to drink. Despite still looking somewhat traumatized, she was trying her best to be her usual cheerful self. Seungyoun sneaked a quick hug as soon as she sat next to him, while the teachers were busy preparing their evening session. Yeonwoo didn’t forget to give Wooshin yet another thank you speech, like what her boyfriend had done just minutes ago. In all honesty, Wooshin would rather have them forget what had happened so he wouldn’t have to hear another word about it.

As Jinhee encircled her arms around Yeonwoo, she gazed at the bonfire in awe. The mighty flame was dancing passionately, reaching up high, she was almost afraid that it could spread and grow bigger. They didn’t even have to come close to it to feel the warmth.

Yet, there was another kind of heat that she could feel on the side of her face, which she was pretty sure wasn’t coming from the bonfire. Head still facing forward, she glanced aside. Her breath got caught in her throat when she realized that Wooshin had been side-eyeing her, and he still did, even when their eyes met.

_W-What… Why isn’t he looking away? Should I look away?_ Jinhee thought in panic.

“Babe, doesn’t it feel like we’re sitting between two bonfires?” Seungyoun asked jokingly, with a concerned face. “It’s like if they’re combined into one, they’ll be much bigger and hotter than that big bonfire over there. Should we move out their way?”

Both Jinhee and Wooshin rolled their eyes, breaking their eye contact.

“Great idea.” Yeonwoo giggled, and sniffled, and sneezed.

“Let’s move next to Yohanie,” Seungyoun said after muttering a _“bless you”._ He took his girlfriend’s hand, and as soon as they lifted their bottoms, Jinhee caught Yeonwoo’s wrist and Wooshin caught Seungyoun’s at the same time.

“Oh, come on.” Jinhee groaned under her breath. “Stay where you are.”

“Okay, let’s stay here,” Yeonwoo said, “the whole island will get caught on fire if we move.”

The couple snickered and continued on with the teasing until the moment their mouths were stuffed with food. Only then did they have mercy on Jinhee and Wooshin’s burning red ears.

“You know, Wooshinie,” Seungyoun started with a full mouth, “you’d think that someone like Yeonwoo would be good at swimming. I mean, she’s kinda wild, you know?”

“Shut up.” Yeonwoo laughed.

“But let me tell you,” Seungyoun ignored her, “she’s afraid of water! I’m sure Jinhee knows about this really well. When she was six, her brother Seungwoo sunbaenim pushed her into a deep adult pool while they were fooling around, and she drowned! She couldn’t bring herself to learn swimming in a pool since then. Oh, I’m totally not spoiling a secret, I’ve got her permission to talk about this! Right, babe?”

Yeonwoo nodded and gave Wooshin a soft smile, while the boy now had his whole attention on her, having stopped munching on his food that was still in his mouth. The background story had struck him with a realization that Jinhee was also aware of.

The way Seungwoo had always treated Wooshin for putting Jinhee’s life in danger back then – perhaps it had gone a little too far, considering that he himself had once endangered his sister too. Seungwoo pushing Yeonwoo into the pool and Wooshin making Jinhee fall down the stairs were both _accidents_ , weren’t they?

And that day, Wooshin had risked his life to save the life of Han Seungwoo’s sister.

“We must tell your brother about what happened today, don’t you think?” Jinhee said to Yeonwoo.

“I think so,” Yeonwoo said. “He’d scold me to no end for sure, but he should know the cool thing Wooshinie did!”

Up to this point, Yeonwoo had been kept in the dark about the stairs incident. Jinhee hadn’t told her that she had found the culprit who had poured the soap and made her fall, as she didn’t want them to be on bad terms. But maybe Yeonwoo was bound to find out soon or later. At least, she could not possibly hate Wooshin now, after his heroic action.

“But I wanna know,” Yeonwoo said again, “why did you save me?”

Wooshin did not have a flattering answer to that. “Automatic reaction,” he answered briefly, his voice deep and cold.

“That’s something I like about him,” Seungyoun said. “It looks like he doesn’t give a damn about everything, but he actually cares. Like, how he found out Yohanie were eating chips earlier but said nothing about it…”

“What chips?” Hangyul searched around the stupefied Yohan.

“…and how he keeps stealing glances at Jinhee although he acts like he doesn’t have feelings for her anymore,” Seungyoun continued and finished with a triumphant smile. Wooshin was utterly pissed.

“Shut your big mouth before you regret opening it,” Wooshin said under his breath. Seungyoun’s laugh exploded.

Wooshin would have left his spot, had not their teacher come to the center with a microphone to start the evening session.

“You can keep on eating, don’t rush.” The male teacher in his early thirties chuckled seeing some panicking students shove big bites of their food into their mouths. “To brighten the atmosphere, your friends here have prepared some performances. You’re welcome to come forth and serve a performance of your own too, if you’d like. It would be even better if anyone who has already created something for the homework could share it here! You may or may not get extra points as the reward. We have plenty of time to enjoy the night, do cherish the moment with your friends before you say goodbye tomorrow for the next one month.”

“It sounds so sad if he puts it like that,” Seungyoun commented.

“I don’t think we’ll even think of each other,” Hangyul said, trying to keep cool. “We’ll all be busy with our own summer stuff. I’m going to be busy eating snacks and sleeping at home. Bet Yohan will be busy checking out some shiny peaches in Hawaii.”

Yohan choked on his food and coughed. “What are you saying?? I’m not going to Hawaii! I don’t even have any plans yet!”

“Us too,” Seungyoun said, pointing at Yeonwoo and himself, “but we can come up with something exciting later. Isn’t it more fun that way? Spontaneity is the key. How about you, Wooshinie? Any summer plans?”

It was pretty much obvious to them that Wooshin couldn’t expect much from staying with his uncle throughout the summer break, but Seungyoun being Seungyoun, involving his favorite friend in the conversation was a must. Wooshin answered by simply shaking his head.

“Looks like Jinhee is the only one here who has her summer plans settled,” Yeonwoo said. The boys turned their heads to the said girl – except Wooshin.

“What are your plans?” Yohan asked, trying not to come off as too curious.

“Well.” Jinhee rubbed her nape. “Mostly family stuff. My youngest aunt is getting married really soon, so there’s going to be a big party, lots of people will come… and then I’m going to Japan with my family to visit relatives there.”

“Just to visit relatives?” Seungyoun raised his eyebrows. “It can’t be just that if you travel abroad!”

“Yeah,” Jinhee grimaced rather awkwardly, “we’re going to spend our holiday there… for three weeks.”

“Oh damn.” Hangyul covered his mouth. “Can’t relate. Got no money.”

It was something that Jinhee was uncomfortable with; talking about something related to her family’s wealth. While Seungyoun, Hangyul, and Yohan were busy feeling envious, and Yeonwoo was humming along to the acoustic performance by their school’s band, both Jinhee and Wooshin remained silent.

_I’m going to miss you._

The words did not go past their lips.

Seeing the other students who volunteered to perform next, Seungyoun was tempted. “Should we perform our new song?” he asked his girlfriend. “Ah, wait, you still don’t feel well. Should I perform for us? We may get extra points!”

“But it’s not completed yet,” Yeonwoo said, “we still need to improve the chord progression and add more to the lyrics. It sounds good already, though… Maybe mash it up with another song?”

_Wow, of course they’ve created something,_ Jinhee thought in awe. And she wondered why the couple hadn’t picked a Performing Arts major like Yohan – they were so good at drawing and painting indeed, but their potential in music was equally big.

Since the previous student performed a ballad song, Yohan decided to volunteer next, as a song suddenly crossed his mind. He came forward and sat in one of the performer’s seats near the bonfire, grabbed the guitar among a few instruments provided there, and adjusted the microphone to his level.

“Gosh, he’s so handsome!” Some girls started whispering. “Look at his sweet smile… he looks like he’s going to sing a romantic song to a girl.”

Yohan cleared his throat and tested the microphone. “Hello, I’m Kim Yohan,” he introduced himself with a calm, soothing voice that reminded them of a late night radio program, or a warm café with live music. “While looking up at the stars earlier, I remembered this song. It’s Maktub’s _To You My Light._ Please enjoy my performance.“

“Aww, it’s a sweet song.” Yeonwoo cooed.

Everyone melted into the warm atmosphere as Yohan’s fingers began to pluck the strings smoothly, creating a beautiful nostalgic melody. The soft, one-of-a-kind singing voice that was easy to distinguish anywhere then blended in, spoiling ears with the sweetest words.

_“On a starlit night_

_You and I are within that scene_

_Your gaze and your smile_

_Make me feel renewed and warm inside_

_I'll treasure it forever_

_  
My heart is filled with you_

_I'm starting to resemble you_

_You are a gift for me_

_More beautiful than any dream_

_Let's walk through the endless night_

_Within each other's embrace_

_I want to give you all of my days_

_I want to tell you all about my feelings_

_The blue winds that can't fall asleep_

_Are brightening up this night_

_  
  
Spending the small moments of our daily life together_

_Did you know that it's my greatest joy?_

_In my universe, you become the light_

_Stay by my side, just like right now…”_

And his gaze turned to her. Although it didn’t last longer than mere two seconds, Yohan’s lovestruck smile was directed towards Jinhee. She froze like a deer caught in the headlights while Yeonwoo wouldn’t stop teasing her.

Someone’s blood was boiling.

_Tch. Clichéd move._ Wooshin looked away. _So what if he can sing? I can sing too if I want to, but I don’t want. He didn’t even write that song. Not his own words. Anyone can sing it even without feelings. Hmph._

His grumbling continued on and on in his mind even after Yohan had returned to his spot next to Hangyul.

“Okay, let’s have one last performance before we move on,” the teacher said. “Who else wants to perform?”

“Ah, me! I want to perform!” Seungyoun jumped onto his feet and raised his whole arm. Seeing a few other raised hands, he started to bounce and wave his arms like a kid. “Pick me, pick me!”

The teacher laughed. “Since he’s so eager, let’s have Cho Seungyoun as our last performer tonight.”

“Yes!! Thank you!” Seungyoun exclaimed and immediately ran to the performer spot in the middle. He bowed in a sudden, passionate whip. “Hello, I’m Cho Seungyoun!”

“Boo!” A boy yelled among the audience, definitely one of Seungyoun’s friends, making some others laugh.

“Since this is the last performance, how about we lift up the mood?” Seungyoun waved his arms and hyped the audience. “My girlfriend over there, Han Yeonwoo and I have written half of a summer song inspired by the beach! Sadly, she’s not feeling well right now, so I’m going to showcase the song for us. It’s called _Waikiki_ , from the name of a place in Hawaii. Why Waikiki when we’re not even in Hawaii? Well, we got the idea from a movie that we once watched, and because it just sounds catchy. Since it’s still unfinished, I’ll perform a mashup of this song and my old song called _Dream_! I’d like to invite my buddy Kim Yohan back to accompany me here.”

Seungyoun picked the guitar and pointed it towards Yohan, who had a dorky shocked look on his face.

“Me? I don’t know your songs!” Yohan mouthed.

He came nonetheless, when the other students gave a round of applause for him. Seungyoun showed him a quick example of the strumming pattern, asked him to play just three chords repeatedly, and then sat on a percussion instrument that looked like a wooden box – a cajon, simply a box-shaped drum played by hitting the front or back part with hands. Seungyoun gave a cue, and their impromptu performance began with a rap. Their audience cheered.

_“Drawing ocean on the ceiling_

_Palm tree on my desk_

_Instead of a deep sigh_

_Mojito is the best again_

_Dolphin surfing on the crashing waves_

_Jumping over the clouds_

_Watching Waikiki in the downtown_

_Dive in Waikiki_

_Step into the sand with the glowing sky lighting up_

_When the sun goes down again,_

_The stars flashing, making a great picture_

_We have to go anywhere_

_This city is too much, it’s not fun, I’ll take you_

_I’ll draw you and me in Waikiki_

_Don’t worry about anything_

_Leave yourself to the rhythm and move_

_Call all your friends to relieve stress_

_Don’t let the volume of the speaker leave you to notice_

_Waikiki, woo yeah_

_Like I can’t stop, woo yeah_

_I dance all night in Waikiki”_

Seungyoun repeated the second half of the song in a more chaotic style, beaming and shaking his upper body side to side, hitting more complex beats on the cajon. The students laughed at his antics and some began to dance on their bottoms. Jinhee and Yeonwoo were laughing and playfully pushing each other with their shoulders, Hangyul was vibing and feeling the beat, and Wooshin stayed flat the whole time.

But if anyone would look _very_ closely, there was the tiniest, faintest smile curling on the corner of his lips.

Transitioning to the second song, Seungyoun took the guitar from Yohan and came closer to the audience, jumping and moving around like it was his show.

_“In Waikiki_

_In Waikiki…_

_We want to be eternally blue,_

_Like the sea in this dream!_

_In this dream!_

_You’re a beautiful picture_

_Wherever I’m with you, it’s a beautiful dream!”_

They all ended up jumping and dancing along. The sound coming from the speaker were not loud enough to bother the campers in other sections of the campground, yet a few strangers who had faintly heard the music came to see the fun. It was a free entertainment to them.

“Your boy is a true entertainer,” Jinhee said to Yeonwoo, laughing as Seungyoun ran past them and flashed a wink at his girlfriend.

Wooshin’s plan to stay seated was ruined when the dance teacher grabbed the micropohone and told them all to keep standing.

“Since you are all up and moving already, we can get right on the game!” The pretty female teacher said. “It’s the random dance game! I’m sure you’re all familiar with it. When you hear a song and you know the choreography, come forth and dance! Very simple, right?”

Still panting and beaming like the sun, Seungyoun returned to his spot between Yeonwoo and Wooshin. “You don’t have to join the game, babe,” he said to the girl, “your body needs to rest.”

_Mine too._ Wooshin clicked his tongue in annoyance. _Won’t play this stupid childish game if there’s no big prize. Like a smartphone… I need a phone._

Of course there were no such prizes. The teachers offered no more than another extra points for their homework. To some students, like Seungyoun, that kind of prize was valuable enough to get competitive.

Famous K-Pop songs then were played randomly. At first, most of the ones who came out were the dancers, as expected, yet eventually there were more and more who danced around the bonfire. Jinhee knew quite a few of the choreographies, she used to love dancing so much after all. She was shy, though, so she stayed and happily danced where she was.

Wooshin stole a glance at her and stifled a chuckle.

_“It’s the love shot! Naaa na na na na na na~”_

“I know this!” Seungyoun yelled and started to dance, raising his arm over his head and bodyrolling teasingly close to Wooshin’s body. The smaller boy shot him an unamused look before landing his whole palm square on the taller’s face and shoving him out of his sight. Seungyoun guffawed and jogged away to the dancing flame, followed by Hangyul, which surprised all his friends. Seemed like the muscle boy would do anything just for those extra points, since he wasn’t going to put too much effort in his homework.

But Wooshin couldn’t care less about extra points. When everyone else was dancing and jumping, he opted to get back down on his butt.

“Okay, next song is the last one for this game!” the dance teacher said, and the song that was playing – Blackpink’s _As If It’s Your Last_ – changed to Twice’s _Dance the Night Away._ The song was played from the beginning, and since it was the last before they had to get down from the fun, the teachers let the teenagers break loose and party on around the bonfire – even joined them halfway through the song. It wasn’t a random dance game anymore. Seungyoun was singing out loud and doing all sorts of absurd moves with his whole body, making Yeonwoo and Jinhee laugh their heads off, until the second chorus of the song came and he did the unexpected – he grabbed both Jinhee and Wooshin’s hands, put them together, and moved them up and down to the beat as in the original choreography. The startled faces that Jinhee and Wooshin made caused the Yeon couple to burst into mad cackles. Shrieking for his life, Seungyoun grabbed his girlfriend’s hand and ran away before Wooshin could launch a high kick to his head.

“Aish!” Jinhee stomped her foot and got ready to chase the couple. Lucky for her, the warm orange light of the flickering flame was enough to mask the hint of red spreading on her cheeks. Yet, somehow, her feet would not move an inch. Her palm was sweating and her heartbeat was resonating in her ears, feeling a strange magnetic force that was trying to pull her towards one direction; to the boy who was then standing less than a meter away from her, completely open access, with no barrier in form of a giggly couple or anything else between them.

Shy, afraid, and full of doubt, ever so slowly, their gazes left the ground and rose until they were captured by each other. One second, two seconds, three seconds passed, neither of them looked away.

And they smiled.

Just like the happier times that they had left behind in the past, this was yet another short-lived moment of joy, wherein the sparks died as fast as a song ended. The trip that was like a sweet dream was coming to an end, they had to wrap it up, whether they liked it or not.

“This trip is surely too short for our liking, isn’t it?” one of the teachers asked. The tired teenagers gave no response to that, as the answer was obvious. They were back on their previous position, sitting in a big circle, but this time there was a hint of blue in the atmosphere.

“It has only been two days, but so much has happened,” the teacher continued. “Let’s use this time to share the things we’ve learned from this trip. All of you should have equal chance to speak, so let’s do it while playing a little game.”

He gave a microphone to a random student. “A music will be played while you pass this mic around, to the friend sitting next to you. When the music stops, the person who holds the mic can speak about their experience.”

Automatically, Jinhee started to arrange words in her mind, in case she was _unlucky_ enough to get a turn.

_Ah, I don’t have much to talk about,_ she thought. _Maybe Yohan was right, I missed a lot of things going on around me._

After four rounds, Seungyoun got the mic. He looked absolutely happy to be allowed to talk.

“I know we were told that we went here to bond with nature, not with our lovers,” Seungyoun quoted the words said by one of the teachers the previous day, making the other students giggle. “But I really enjoyed my time with my close friends here, including with my girlfriend. The song I performed earlier is the very first piece that we work together on, it feels like we’re on a whole new level now. You all know that there was an accident today. She fell into the river. I had never been so scared before, really, it was a whole new sensation that I don’t want to feel the second time. But, we have a hero here.” He gave a pat on Wooshin’s shoulder, startling the drowsy boy. “He is Kim Wooseok, although sometimes he prefers being called other names. I would have jumped into that river if I had been there, but I wasn’t. He was, though, and he did what I would’ve done. So I’m the most grateful for him. How many of you would risk your life to save your classmate? Not many, I’m pretty sure. But he did _that_.”

“It’s not that deep,” Wooshin mumbled.

“Many of you are our classmates too,” Seungyoun continued, “so you guys know what kind of image he has at school. The image that people carelessly slapped smack-dab on his face.”

“Stop being dramatic,” Wooshin mumbled again.

“Well,” Seungyoun ignored him, “I guess this incident is a lesson for many. The lesson is not to judge anyone based on what you see on the surface, or the label that you see on their forehead. You can find out what kind of person they truly are only when you build a strong friendship with them. Believe me, if you can do that, the weird nerd in your class one day may become an irreplaceable part of your life. Can we give a round of applause for what my best buddy did today?”

Wooshin’s chest swelled with blooming warmth as he got the applause that he would have never expected to get in his life. For once, he was genuinely appreciated. With that he knew that his presence wasn’t just a waste of space in the world – or even just in that shared body.

He hated how it made him emotional.

On the other hand, Jinhee was relieved. At least Seungyoun’s inspirational speech had sounded out most of the words that she couldn’t say herself. So when the mic stopped in her hand, she just had to complete it from her perspective.

“Honestly, I had so much to worry about during this trip,” she said, “but today someone told me that happiness is like a wild flower… a small, simple, yet pretty flower. Oftentimes we relate happiness to a special, pleasant event, like when we achieve or obtain something that we long for. But this person reminded me that happiness can also be found in the smallest and simplest things. It may not be something big, but still, it’s a beautiful feeling… like… When we dance and sing together. When you look at someone you cherish so much, and they smile at you. Although those moments didn’t last long, the happiness they’ve brought is so powerful that even Yeonwoo, who nearly drowned today, can smile and laugh again. I’ve realized that just being around people I love is enough to make me happy. I thought I was going to lose two of them today, but now that they’re still here with us, I’ll treasure them more than ever, just like the memories from this trip.”

Yeonwoo captured Jinhee in a bone-crushing hug as soon as she finished talking. “It’s not that easy to lose me, you know? If you could survive falling down the stairs, surely I could survive falling into a river!” she shot a sad puppy look.

Wooshin tensed up at the mention of the stairs incident, but his mind was entirely occupied by something else; by Jinhee’s words.

_People I love… Two of them… Treasure them more than ever._

_Two._

Not just Yeonwoo, but him too.

She _loved_ him too.

Yeonwoo’s words resonated in his mind. _“Love is worth it, and Cha Jinhee still loves you so much… Hang on for her… not only in this river, but also in your life.”_

He had had no confidence to believe those words. Now that Jinhee had indirectly told everyone that he was also someone she _loved_ , at least someone who meant something to her, he was torn, and so close to breaking down, he had to dig his nails into his arms so he wouldn’t run away and cry.

His wish was heard; after one more student was done talking, their night session was wrapped up and they were finally allowed to return to their tents. While the others chose to stay a bit longer and enjoy the remaining short time of their trip together, Wooshin didn’t wait a second longer to flee to his tent. Getting worried, Seungyoun caught up just five minutes later. He found the other boy all curled up in the tent, under a thin blanket and nothing else to keep him warm.

“Oh! Why are you sleeping like this? Where’s your sleeping bag? You’ll be as cold as frozen french fries in the morning!” Seungyoun freaked out finding out that Wooshin didn’t own a sleeping bag. He went away, and less than five minutes later, he came back with a black sleeping bag.

“Here, the teachers brought some extra sleeping bags. Sleep in that thing!” Seungyoun commanded with a sad tone. Wooshin did as he was told to, just so the other boy would shut up and leave him be. He lay back down in the sleeping bag and turned his back to Seungyoun. His pride was too big to admit that he felt much warmer and comfortable then.

“I’ve promised to spend some time with Yeonwoo… Are you gonna be okay here alone?” Seungyoun asked softly.

“Leave.” Wooshin thought he wouldn’t mind being alone for the rest of the trip. He had so much to think about after all, and Seungyoun was just a nuisance.

“Okay. Just come out and call me if you need anything, alright? We’ll be sitting near the bonfire,” Seungyoun said before leaving the tent. The sound of his footsteps on the rustling grass faded away, and then there was silence. When silence came, both peace and loneliness were also present.

Wooshin sighed.

_I still love you too… but I can’t be selfish. I’ll keep you away from that demon._

Under nobody’s witness, a drop of tear slipped out and trickled down his cheek.

Two tents away, Jinhee, who had just returned alone, was anxious.

“No, I can’t just go to sleep.” She rubbed her tired face and pinched the bridge of her nose, closing her eyes. “I need to do something, don’t I? I must be stupid if I don’t do anything.”

Despite her unprepared heart, Jinhee pushed herself out her tent, and looked around cautiously before sneaking past the border line between the girls and boys’ areas like a spy. Her heartbeat was getting erratic when she crashed onto her knees behind a particular blue tent. The light inside was still left on, either it was empty or the person inside was still awake.

She knocked on the thin surface of the tent and loudly whispered, “Wooshin! Come out!”

Inside the tent, Wooshin flinched and quickly wiped his wet cheek. He wondered, who could it be? Was it Seungyoun? Why would he do that? Well, who was he kidding? Of course he knew who it was.

The knock and loud whisper came again, this time louder and clearer, and the feminine voice made Wooshin’s heart jump.

She had crossed the line just to see _him._

Heart thumping madly against his chest, Wooshin got up and rid himself of the sleeping bag, and yet, he stopped at the tent’s entrance. There was a big fight between his mind and his heart – his common sense was screaming for him to stay back, for their own good, but his miserable heart was desperately reaching out to the only one keeping it alive. He needed it to stay alive. To hang on for _her._

So he chose to step out and let himself get pulled by the magnet that was his first and only love, ignoring all his fear and his worries of the future, the bad things that might follow this one careless action – he surrendered them all the moment he saw those eyes, and he fell into the arms that had always been his safe haven.

They held each other as if they had gone through an endless raging storm across the ocean, and finally met again at the other end – a tight big hug like they were never going to let go. The tears that they had been holding back were then falling freely, though they were falling in silence. No words were needed to tell their stories, just relieved tears and a hug, witnessed only by the moon and the stars.

“I miss you,” Jinhee mewled, “please stay.”

“I’m still here.” Wooshin heaved a deep breath and bit his quivering lip in a desperate attempt to control his emotions. He held the other closer, so she wouldn’t pull back and see the endless streams on his cheeks.

“I’m so glad you’re still here.” Jinhee choked back a sob. “You… as a whole… and you, as the same Wooshin… Y-You’re still the same.”

Wooshin realized that Jinhee was referring to not just the river accident that day, but also the splits that had occurred in his alter system; one split had created Taejun and changed Woo, yet Wooshin was, apparently, still the same Wooshin after Jaemi had split off of him.

“I’m not the same,” Wooshin said bitterly, “I’m—I’m weak. Something was taken from me because I couldn’t face it. _She_ said that.”

“That’s not true, you’re not weak,” Jinhee said, “you’ve proven that today. Jaemi… She’s there to help, right? You and Wooseok don’t have to bear everything alone now, it doesn’t mean you’re weak. You’re… You’ve been so brave, and so strong.”

Maybe Wooshin was right; he wasn’t _exactly_ the same. Jinhee could no longer see the typical confidence in his eyes.

“There are things that you don’t know,” he hinted, hesitantly pulling back from the other’s arms. Self-conscious of the state his face was in, he averted his head away and harshly wiped his cheeks with the back of his hand. “None of _us_ are the same,” he referred to the alters, “even the nerd isn’t the same. H-He’s been exposed to a memory that he’s not supposed to remember. We’re a mess. This mess will get worse.”

“No, it won’t, don’t say that,” Jinhee scolded softly.

“It will.” Wooshin’s sharp gaze then flitted back to Jinhee, catching her off guard. “You don’t know what’s happening. You don’t know that last night I heard a new voice. There are more and more, I can’t control these people, it’s not just me, the nerd, and the kid anymore. Not three, but seven, then what? Nine lives in one, like a cat? That’s not even funny. You don’t know… You don’t know how scary it is.”

Wooshin’s shoulders rose and fell along with his breath that was heavy with emotions. Jinhee was stunned.

“…Sorry. Didn’t mean to dump it on you.” Wooshin dropped his head. “I’ll go back inside.”

“No, wait.” Jinhee caught the other’s wrist, like the way he had always held hers before; possessive and somehow protective. “It’s… it’s okay, you can let it out. It’s true, I don’t know anything… I don’t even know why you push everyone out when we’re all here to help and protect you. But, now that you’re here telling me that you’re scared, I know it wasn’t what you wanted… right? Distancing yourself from us, from me… You didn’t want it to go that way, did you?”

Wooshin’s answer was no more than shaking his head, but it was enough for Jinhee. It was enough to know that he had never wanted to break what they had started.

“Then… What made you do that?” Jinhee struggled to fight back her tears. “Why won’t you let anyone help you? Will you tell me?”

Once again, Wooshin shook his head – it was always a no. Jinhee bit her quivering lip and forced out a smile, which instead of making the boy feel better, sent a pang to his heart.

“Okay.” She nodded. “It’s okay. Maybe… Maybe there’s something that can’t be discovered. Although I don’t see why… But if you keep going like this for so long, there must be a good reason for it, right? Although… Although it doesn’t make any sense to me. Perhaps you think there’s nothing we can do? Or maybe you’re afraid someone may get hurt when we try? I don’t know your reason, right, but whatever it is… I don’t think it’s worth your freedom and happiness. Whatever it takes to set you free, I would go through it for you.”

Wooshin found himself unable to utter a single word. All he did was watching fresh tears fall, watching them wet the grass in a hot summer. But he couldn’t stand it. He couldn’t keep on pretending to be tough and emotionless anymore, like he wasn’t hurting when she was.

And so, as the night clouds lazed away, making way for the moon to boast its enchanting light, an old flame between two hearts came back to life once again in a simple, genuine touch – a lingering kiss on the forehead. He wiped those tears away and put on a bandage in form of a heartfelt little kiss, helplessly hoping that it could at least put both their hearts at ease for a short while.

Jinhee’s round brown eyes were wide, glazed and shining with the tears that had just stopped abruptly out of surprise.

“Don’t cry.” Wooshin retracted his face away from the other’s, shyly and nervously rubbing his nape. “I’m sorry.”

_My freedom and happiness are not worth your safety and well-being._

Jinhee reached out to touch the other’s face. He pulled away. She sighed.

“How come you could touch me, but I can’t touch you?” her question came out a little too desperate. Getting no answers, she tried again.

As soft fingertips brushed against his skin, awakening his memories of the old affection they used to share, instinctively Wooshin leaned into her touch, giving off the fact that he had been craving for it. He lost all his ability to keep his guard up when the distance between them was eliminated once again. His eyes fluttered closed and a shaky breath left his parted lips as a soft, innocent kiss was planted on his wet cheek – perhaps not enough to satiate his longing, yet almost a little too much for his self-control to keep the strong desire at bay. It wasn’t like he could expect something more to happen – they were just teenagers on a school summer trip, out in the open, exposed to the risk of getting caught any second.

They blinked at each other, slow to process what had just happened, and when it seeped into their minds, both looked away feeling their cheeks burn.

_We’re definitely pulling a stunt,_ Jinhee thought, _hope no one saw that._

Wooshin’s concern was something entirely different. Suddenly he remembered the wild flowers that he had picked earlier that day – they were then crushed to bits in the pocket of his wet pants. He couldn’t help but feel upset about that. Then, he remembered something else.

“You… You’re going to be away.” Wooshin cleared his throat awkwardly, addressing Jinhee’s holiday plan.

“Yes… but I didn’t want it to be that long. I won’t have enough time to do my homework.” A realization then dawned on her. “You can meet Wooseok’s parents, though… Y-You can make use of this chance! Aren’t you going to visit them? Or aren’t they going to visit you?”

The boy’s faint irritated look made her feel rather nervous.

“The demon is planning something to keep them away from seeing _us_.” _Us,_ as in Wooseok and the other alters. “The nerd’s uncle will find an excuse. As always. His old method was taking us along with him on his business trips. For ‘holiday’.” Wooshin rolled his eyes.

Jinhee exhaled a helpless sigh. “Would you… Would you at least let me know how things go? Would you find a way to contact me?”

Wooshin held his words back as he realized that he was opening up too much for his common sense to accept. He wasn’t supposed to let this continue beyond that last night of their trip.

“I don’t have a phone.” He dropped his head and his tone became somewhat colder. “The man smashed it. But of course the nerd still has his email and PC at home.”

Contrary to the invisible dark cloud above Wooshin’s head, Jinhee’s face brightened up. “Oh! Why didn’t I think of that? Of course I could send you emails! I’ve never felt so dumb before. I’m—I’m going to send you an email as soon as I get home tomorrow, please read it and reply, okay? You will read it, won’t you?”

Wooshin nodded and bowed his head deeper, unable to look at Jinhee in the eyes. Oh, how she was going to be _very_ disappointed.

“Thank you… I’ll keep on checking my emails from now on.” Then smiling, Jinhee leaned in and gently wrapped her arms around the guilt-ridden boy.

“Whenever you need help, you can always rely on me. Believe me, I’d do anything to see you free someday.”

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**

This is kind of _very_ late, we're 18 chapters in but a while ago I found a picture of a female idol who quite resembled Jinhee's image that I had in mind. I didn't know who she was, and later I found out she was Loona's Heejin!

Looks pretty close, except that she doesn't have dimples. I searched up more photos of her, but she looks a bit like Jinhee only in this pic and not in other pics. Maybe it's because of the smile or the eyes, but at least now you can imagine what she looks like lol and coincidentally their names are similar (Heejin & Jinhee)! I don't know what kind of person Heejin is (I don't stan girl groups), I'll just "borrow" her face here ^^

As for Yeonwoo, Seungwoo's sister, I've always imagined her looking like Itzy's Chaeryeong

Can you see the resemblance? no? :D I might believe they were siblings if I didn't know them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> anyways next chapter, Jinhee will run into someone unexpected! New alter (and maybe an old one too?) will show up, and after that, things will go downnn down down crashing to the rock bottom. I believe that's enough teaser/spoiler :D thank you for reading this story, please keep waiting for the updates!
> 
> P.S.: I just had to promote Seungyoun's songs here lmao his new album "Equal" is totally a masterpiece, listen to his new songs if you haven't!


	19. Chapter 19

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !TRIGGER WARNING!: VIOLENCE/PHYSICAL ABUSE (in the second part of this chapter)

* * *

To be frank, Jinhee never really liked family gatherings with those on her father’s side, whom she met once in a blue moon. She had despised meeting them as a young child, and as a grown seventeen-year-old then, she still disliked it as much, although she had learnt not to let it show over the years. Her brother could relate very well. They had good reasons to hate being stuck with those relatives at one place, like this very moment, when they had to gather again for the wedding of their father’s youngest sister.

It was held in a grand ballroom of a five-star hotel. Jinhee and Junho’s grandparents were most definitely on the affluent side, renowned for having established several successful businesses since their younger days, hence why they had so many people to invite to their one and only daughter’s wedding. The joyful old couple were on standby at the entrance, together with their three sons – Doctor Cha Hyunho and his big brothers – as well as the groom’s family, greeting the endless line of guests who were coming in.

Lots of round dining tables had been prepared and assigned for the guests. As they were family members of the bride, Jinhee and Junho were supposed to sit at a table in the front area. But they were not present there at the moment.

Instead, they spent all the time they had before the event officially began to lurk around the hotel and check themselves out in the restrooms’ wide mirrors. Jinhee was wearing a simple sleeveless navy blue dress, matching Junho’s suit in the same color. Her black hair had grown longer, its wavy ends then reaching her waist. It was left cascading down her back, with two long braids on the left side, making her look more adorable. She had applied natural makeup as well – simple yet pretty, like a little flower. Cha Jinhee was not out to attract some boys after all, unlike Junho, who had put extra effort styling his hair up and exposing his clear forehead in order to secretly impress some girls.

But he was certainly not going to mingle with any girls that night, because the siblings looked more like a couple when they walked into the hall, with Jinhee’s hand around Junho’s arm, joking and laughing about their annoying relatives. The fact that their faces didn’t quite resemble each other made it more believable that they were lovers instead of siblings.

“Oh! Jinhee and Junho?”

A man’s voice put their steps to a halt. They turned their heads and found a middle-aged man and his family sitting at a table, smiling at them. Neither of the teenagers could recognize them.

“Yes! Hello!” Jinhee greeted with a smile and a polite bow, Junho following suit, despite not knowing who the man was. It always happened in that sort of big event involving relatives of relatives.

“Wow, you two have grown up so well!” The man laughed and got up to talk to them. “Ah, you must not remember me. I’m close friends with both your father and your aunt, but I moved abroad. Last time we met, you both were still little kids! But your faces haven’t changed much, I still remember! Junho looks like his father, and Jinhee looks like her mother.”

After minutes of a rather awkward social interaction with the man and his family, both Jinhee and Junho blew out a relieved sigh as they managed to end the conversation and walk away. Talking to _strangers_ wasn’t really their favorite.

Just a moment later, though, they ran into two other teens – a girl and a boy around their ages – who made Jinhee roll her eyes.

“Cha Jinhee. Cha Junho.” The girl greeted with a smug smile. She was somewhat taller than Jinhee, her hair was dyed dark brown and her lips were bubblegum pink matching her dress. The lanky boy in a black shirt standing next to her – who looked like a taller, skinnier, and colder version of Junho – didn’t look too friendly either; he chose to look anywhere but the siblings in front of him.

“Cha Nari. Cha Minki.” Jinhee greeted back lazily, copying the other girl.

They were their cousins, the children of their father’s second big brother.

“Nice to see you guys again,” Nari, the sister, threw an obvious sarcasm, “spoiled kids of a spoiled man.”

Feeling her bubbling anger raise to the top of her head, Jinhee gritted her teeth and clenched her fists on her sides. “Look, we don’t even meet once a year. If you’re here just to throw snide remarks at us and our family, just turn and walk away, please, we’re not having any of it.”

“Oh, so that’s how you talk to your cousins.” Nari cocked an eyebrow. “Do you really think you can tell us to go away just like that? Because you’re _richer_ than us?”

Junho could feel her sister quickly losing her patience. He held her shoulder as a sign to keep it cool.

“Excuse me?” Jinhee blinked at the other in disbelief. “What a shallow thing to say. You literally started it first by calling us _spoiled_. None in our family is spoiled!”

“Yes you are!” Nari fired back. “You live at grandfather’s old house, he _gave_ that house to your dad for free while the other sons had to work hard! Isn’t that what you’d call ‘spoiled’??”

“Oh, come on! When will you ever stop bringing that up? You know too well that my dad got the house because he had nothing! Just a lost amateur doctor, while his brothers were already making enough money to afford their own homes! It’s not like you live on the streets. You yourself live in a damn expensive luxury apartment! Isn’t that enough for you??” Jinhee growled, trying her best to keep her voice not loud enough to attract some attention.

“It’s nothing compared to your house! A _whole_ freaking stand-alone private house, that already says a lot!”

“You’re so damn ungrateful, I feel bad for your parents! I don’t even care what people think about where I live!”

Nari and Jinhee glared daggers at each other.

“Let’s just leave them be, noona.” Minki tugged his sister’s hand. “I want to sit down.”

Junho did just the same, and Jinhee ddn’t need to be asked twice to turn and stomp away.

“You’re a spoiled kid, Cha Jinhee!” Nari yelled, and Minki slapped a hand over her mouth immediately as many heads turned towards them.

“Don’t shout too, noona,” Junho warned Jinhee in panic, “she’s just embarrassing herself. Don’t do that too.”

Scowling, Jinhee watched as Minki pulled his sister away from the center of attention. “If there’s one person in this room who deserves being called _spoiled,_ that would be her, not me. Hmph!”

She grabbed Junho’s hand and fast-walked towards their table.

“Wait! Wait! Cha Jinhee??”

Another feminine voice calling her name from the distance made Jinhee stop abruptly, causing Junho to crash into her back. She tried her best to wipe the exasperation off her face and put on a sweet smile before turning around to face whoever it was.

“Yes?” she asked, thinking, _I’m quite famous, aren’t I?_

A small, slender, beautiful girl in a cream pleated dress stopped before them, bending forward to catch her breath after running across the room. Her cheeks were flushed pink and her peach-colored full lips reminded Jinhee of a mochi and a baby duck, a combination of both. Her lush black hair was so straight and long, Jinhee thought a bug might slip if it landed on that perfect hair, and her straight bangs that framed her small face made her look even more adorable.

“I’m sorry,” the girl said, “I heard that girl say your name and it sounded so familiar… You could be a different person, but I have to make sure. Did you go to Gyuwon middle school?”

Jinhee and Junho were taken aback. “Yes, how did you know? Did we go to the same school?” Jinhee asked, trying her best to search the face in her memories.

The other girl let out a quiet gasp, a restrained excitement apparent in her expression. “D-Did you fall down the stairs and break your legs??”

“Yes, I did! How did you know??” Jinhee was even more astonished by the fact that there was a stranger who still remembered the incident.

The somewhat smaller girl did little jumps and covered her mouth to conceal her squeal before bowing ninety degrees to introduce herself. “Hello, I’m Son Doyeon! It’s so great to meet you here!”

The Cha siblings gawked at each other. All of a sudden, Jinhee felt like passing out due to the great shock that came upon hearing the name.

_Is this a dream? Running into Son Doyeon, at my aunt’s wedding… That’s the most unlikely thing to happen!_

But then, she could only feel terribly sorry for Wooseok that he wasn’t there to see his first love again after years of no contact.

Out of the corner of her eye, Jinhee saw an equally small boy run towards them. He stopped next to Doyeon looking like he had run a marathon and began to whine, while Jinhee and Junho were busy admiring the resemblance between the other two’s faces.

“Ah, noona! Don’t leave me like that ever again! You know it’s hard to find each other in a place like this when we’re both shorter than everybody else!” the boy stomped his feet adorably. Junho stiffled a quiet giggle seeing his antics.

“You can just call my phone or go back to Mom and Dad if you get lost, stop whining,” Doyeon scolded in a hushed voice. “This is Cha Jinhee, the girl that I used to tell you about.”

The little brother’s mouth fell open wide. “Really??”

Doyeon held the boy behind his neck and pushed him down to bow at the other siblings. “Sorry for his rudeness, this is my younger brother, Son Dongpyo!”

Dongpyo rubbed his neck and pouted at his sister before flashing a cheeky smile at Jinhee and Junho. “Nice to meet you.”

“Ah, yes, this is my brother, Cha Junho.” Jinhee introduced her brother as well. Junho gave a polite bow and an adorable eye smile. “On whose side are you?” she asked, because if Doyeon came as the bride’s guest, her aunt, the world was so small indeed.

“The groom’s!” Doyeon answered. “He and our father work together at the company owned by the groom’s father. And you guys?”

“The bride’s, she is our aunt.” Jinhee beamed.

After a quick introduction, all four of them moved aside and quickly sank into an endless nostalgic conversation related to a particular boy; Kim Wooseok. Jinhee even showed a photo of Wooseok to Doyeon, one that had been taken when they had gone to the amusement park back then.

“Oh, it’s so great to know that he managed to make friends with you and fixed the problem!” Doyeon’s smiling eyes twinkled in delight. “You know… even when I transferred school to Busan, he still couldn’t stop worrying about you. Especially Wooshin. I remember how he talked about you whenever he came out.”

“Did he?” Jinhee’s eyebrows went up, genuinely surprised. Hearing that Wooshin used to talk about her was sort of strange to her, especially then that he had been ignoring her and her emails since the summer trip. It just seemed so unlikely.

“Yes! He used to say things like, ‘Yesterday I saw her outside her school, she was walking just fine,’ or ‘I ran into her on the way to school, she was laughing with her friend. She’s not sad anymore,’ or ‘I’m going to ask that tall idiot guy in her school if she’s really fine’,” Doyeon mimicked Wooshin’s voice and stoic face, causing the other three teenagers to giggle. “Wooseokie didn’t talk about you as much, but eventually, Wooshin made me start to think… ‘Oh, maybe he has a crush on her?’ Being friends with him back then, I learned a lot about his disorder. I knew that of course Wooseokie and his alters could have different feelings towards one person. I must say that I wasn’t as close with Wooshin as I was with Wooseokie… I mean, we were very close friends, but just that.”

As Doyeon was speaking, various expressions that were easy to read played on her face. Jinhee wondered if the other could feel that she was being observed meticulously, because that was what Jinhee was doing; searching for a hint of displeasure in those expressions.

_Now that I think about it… I know that Wooseok had feelings for Doyeon, but I have no idea how Doyeon felt towards him,_ Jinhee thought. _If the feeling was mutual… She could’ve felt jealous, no?_

“Noona, you should tell about Kim Doyeon,” Junho reminded.

“Huh?” Doyeon seemed surprised and puzzled. “Who is Kim Doyeon?”

A distant smile graced Jinhee’s lips as a blue feeling arose in her heart for an unclear reason. “She’s… Wooseok’s new female alter. I think she came to life from a memory fragment related to you.”

“Oh…” Doyeon blinked, not really sure what she felt about it.

“Wait, a girl inside a boy??” Dongpyo gasped. “Is she like my noona? Oh no, he’s in trouble.”

Doyeon pouted at her brother, who gave an inncocent grin and two peace signs in return.

Jinhee chuckled. “She’s as cheerful and friendly as you. Definitely an extrovert.”

“Oh, I’m not an extrovert.” Doyeon smiled bashfully. “Normally I don’t talk this much… Maybe it’s because I used to hear so much about you, it almost feels like meeting an old friend. If Wooseokie has told you about me, I guess you know that I was also bullied in middle school.”

“He told me about that, yeah.” Jinhee nodded. “I hope things are better for you now?”

“Much, _much_ better.” Doyeon grinned.

“She lives abroad now and has a boyfriend in Canada,” Dongpyo spilled, “a handsome foreigner—Mmph!”

Doyeon covered Dongpyo’s mouth and shot a sweet smile at the other two. “We broke up last week.”

“S-Sorry to hear that.” Jinhee shifted uncomfortably, contemplating pointing out the question she had been holding back. Perhaps it would be a good reason to change topic. “Um, if you don’t mind me asking… Why did you and Wooseok lose contact?”

From the way Doyeon froze up for a couple of seconds, it was clear that she hadn’t seen the question coming – at least not that soon.

“Um…” She took her hand off Dongpyo’s mouth and fidgeted with her fingers.

“Oh, y-you don’t have to answer it if you don’t want to!” Jinhee waved her hands in panic and internally scolded herself.

“It’s alright, though!” Doyeon let out a small laugh that sounded so endearing. Even Junho thought so. “Ah, well… You see… It was hard to say goodbye to him back then. It wasn’t my choice to move to Busan. I thought I would never be able to meet him again due to the circumstances, and I was afraid I might feel even sadder if I contacted him, so I changed my phone number. I was glad I had done so, because after living there for just a year, my mother brought me along to Canada. My parents… they got divorced. That’s why my mother and I left Seoul.”

“Gosh, I’m so sorry for making you talk about this… Have things really been better for you now?” Jinhee held Doyeon’s arm and offered an apologetic smile.

“Yes! Don’t worry… My mother has a boyfriend now.” Doyeon laughed. “He’s a very sweet man, I wouldn’t mind having him as my father. Things are different for Dongpyo, though. He lives with our father and our new stepmother. We came here with them!”

“Doyeon noona doesn’t really like our stepmom, but that woman is so nice to me. She likes to cook, it’s like we eat meals from a good restaurant every day,” Dongpyo piped up.

“Whoa, wait, you guys don’t live together?” Junho asked in surprise. “That must be so hard.”

“It’s so damn sad.” Dongpyo pouted. “Well, what can we do? Our parents got over each other so fast, maybe they were really fed up with each other. We’re also over it, I guess. Aren’t we, noona?”

Doyeon answered with a little nod.

“At least we’re still allowed to see each other and both of them,” Dongpyo continued, “although it usually doesn’t last long. Like this summer break. Once it ends, noona will have to go back to Canada.”

“So… You’re staying there permanently?” Jinhee asked, thinking, _That’s too bad, she should at least see Wooseok once before she goes back. He would be so happy._

“Actually… that’s been the biggest question I’ve been pondering this year.” Doyeon chuckled. “It’s also the reason why I broke up with my ex there. I—”

Doyeon’s story was cut off as soon as the Master of Ceremonies came and announced the opening of the wedding, greeting all the guests. Since they had to go to their respective tables, where their families were waiting for them, Doyeon and Jinhee quickly exchanged phone numbers, so they could meet up again later. It still felt so surreal to Jinhee when she saved the number under the name _Son Doyeon._

While the girls were doing so, Dongpyo approached Junho confidently and handed his phone to him. “What’s your Instagram? Let me follow you.”

Despite being taken aback by the smaller boy’s boldness, Junho took the phone anyway and typed in his username before returning it back to the owner.

“Wow, 826 followers. Famous, aren’t you? Must be because of that face.” Dongpyo commented as he tapped the follow button. The follower count changed to 827. “Done. Follow back, alright?”

“Alright.” Junho nodded, blinking dumbly like a robot.

Later, at their family’s table, he checked Dongpyo’s profile to follow him back, as he was asked to. The page was full of cheeky selfies that mostly accentuated his plump lips.

_1,600 followers… And he said I was famous? Whoa._

Then, he discreetly searched for the sister’s account – not that he was going to follow her or anything.

The moment the bride entered the room, half of the lights were turned off and all spotlights fell on her, pulling all attention to the beautiful lady who looked like a princess in her stunning white wedding dress. Jinhee was amazed by the sight, and even more by the expression that was plastered on the groom’s face. His smile stretched from ear to ear, and his eyes were blinking multiple times, clearly trying his best not to shed a tear watching his love walk down the flower path, coming to him so slowly and gracefully.

_That kind of happiness must be something truly indescribable,_ Jinhee thought. _Will I feel such feelings too someday? Who… Who will stand in that guy’s place? Will he smile like that too?_

Out of the blue, an image of smiling Wooseok in a suit, standing at the end of a flower path flashed by in her mind, startling and embarrassing herself.

_Gosh! What am I fantasizing just now?? Ahh, I can’t believe myself…_

She buried her flushed face in her palms and internally whined, while her brother sitting beside her continued on being busy stalking someone’s Instagram page.

_Now that Doyeon is here… They’re probably going to end up falling in love again._

Jinhee sighed.

Son Doyeon had such a bright aura, everything about her was sweet and adorable. Her baby face, her cute voice, the fresh and sweet scent of her perfume, her neat pastel-colored nail polish, even her belongings like her cute strawberry milk phonecase. Instead of wearing glasses, she had vibrant brown contact lenses on, making her look more doll-like. Nobody would have guessed that she had once been a bullied nerd in middle school. How would Wooseok react once he saw her again?

For some reasons, a part of Jinhee – the selfish and insecure part that she was embarrassed of – did not want them to reunite.

The guilt that came with that thought only became stronger when she approached Doyeon again after the wedding ceremony and dinner had ended. While the guests were slowly making their way out the hall, they sat at a random empty table together with their brothers, continuing where they had left off.

“We broke up because I told him my plan on going back and continuing my study here,” Doyeon said, “he couldn’t accept it.”

“Y-You’re going to move back here?” Jinhee asked, surprised.

“Well, yes!” Doyeon beamed. “At least that’s what I think is best to do. I’ve been thinking this through. It may sound a bit silly, but Wooseokie was the one who made me consider going back. We haven’t even heard from each other for years.”

Junho glanced at his sister, knowing well what she might be feeling at the moment. Her smile was distant and restrained, yet she made sure it stayed there.

“Why Wooseok hyung?” Junho asked for Jinhee.

Doyeon’s bright smile faltered just the slightest bit as she averted her gaze to Dongpyo, who motioned his head as if telling her to just go ahead and talk.

“Ah, well, but before that…” Doyeon cleared her throat and fixed her sitting position. “May I ask something?”

It was Jinhee and Junho’s turn to look at each other, confused by the sudden change in the sheepish tone.

“Sure?” Jinhee answered doubtfully.

“Sorry if this comes off as too nosy for you, but, are you guys more than friends?” Doyeon lowered her voice and blinked in anticipation, her question prying yet her expression remaining innocent.

Jinhee choked on air and coughed a little. _Oh gosh, where is this heading to?_

“I-I’m sorry! Did that surprise you?” Doyeon squirmed uncomfortably in her seat, while Dongpyo watched as the other concerned boy gently rubbed Jinhee’s back, feeling somewhat envious of their closeness.

“It’s fine,” Jinhee answered, giving a small smile of assurance. “Honestly, I don’t know how to answer that… It’s been so complicated.”

“They were really close, but there’s a problem so they can’t be close anymore,” Junho added quickly to help make things more straightforward.

“Is it his uncle?” Doyeon asked.

“He’s keeping it from everyone.” Jinhee let out a helpless sigh, finally letting her smile fly away. “He’s been avoiding us and other friends at school. He wouldn’t tell us why he wouldn’t let us help him. But… Yes, it must be his uncle.”

Doyeon fell silent as she observed the other girl, the tone in her voice and the gloomy cloud over her face.

“It must be so frustrating to you, isn’t it?” she asked softly. “I used to feel the same way. Feeling useless because I knew what happened to him every day, but couldn’t do anything to help, because I was helpless myself. Whenever he came to school with new wounds, often without even knowing how he had gotten those wounds, I could only hug him and cry with him. He… He meant so much to me.”

Jinhee dropped her head and fought back the emotions that were coming with the memories of Wooseok’s hard times, the scenes in which she had been there too to comfort him, just like what Doyeon had done in the past.

It was just that now she realized, Doyeon had been there first. Perhaps she even knew much more. And maybe, just maybe, Doyeon was the one who could help Wooseok, now that she was coming back.

“Have you been in my position all this time?” Doyeon asked again. “Did you stay by his side?”

“…Yes, until I couldn’t pass his wall anymore.” Jinhee swallowed thick. “Maybe… you can?”

“Then, I’m glad,” Doyeon said.

Jinhee raised her head to see that the other girl was smiling at her.

“Glad to know that someone’s been there to take care of him!” Doyeon clarified her statement, her smile growing bigger. “Once Wooseokie said, he would wait in case I might come back. Now I’m relieved, he’s not waiting for me anymore. If he’s trusted you to know him inside out, _you_ are enough, Cha Jinhee.”

Doyeon leaned in, to make sure Jinhee heard every single word she uttered. “It would be a lie to say I didn’t feel jealous back then, whenever Wooshin talked about you. Yes, he did that crazy thing to you while trying to defend me, in the wrong way, but that was because I protected him too from his bullies. Eventually I had to accept that his heart and Wooseok’s weren’t the same. They were not the same person. It's great if you can win one heart in that body… but if you can win _all_ hearts he has, you are the luckiest.”

Doyeon leaned back, and Jinhee released her breath that she had unwittingly been holding.

“I guess I confused you when I said I wanted to come back because of Wooseokie.” The smaller girl giggled. “I’ll make it clear for you! While I don't have any romantic feelings for him anymore, I have this urge to continue chasing my dream that exists because of him. I want to be a psychiatrist! He was once a huge part in my life, we went through hard times together. I want to dedicate my life for people like us, in my own home country. Broken people. By the time I’ve achieved my dream… I hope he has healed too. But now, I’m just a high school student like you, I haven’t been in touch with him… I’m sorry, I really don’t see how I can help him, Jinhee.”

But then, as she was speaking, Doyeon’s eyes caught a figure passing by their table, on the way out the room. A quiet gasp jumped out her open mouth.

“That’s… That’s Wooseokie’s grandfather.”

“Where??” Jinhee and Junho asked in unison, turning their bodies around.

Doyeon pointed at an old man in a black suit, standing not far away, supporting his weight on a black and gold walking stick. “That man.”

He had a younger man close by his side at all time, and from his attire – a black suit and a grey vest over a white dress shirt, a black bowtie, black slacks, and a pair of white gloves – it could be assumed that he was his personal assistant. The old man had a kind smile when he turned his head to the younger male, answering his question that the teenagers could not hear from their table.

“Of course he is here,” Doyeon mumbled, more like speaking to herself, “he’s one of the main shareholders!”

“Shareholder of what?” Dongpyo asked.

“The company where Dad works at! The groom’s father owns the company, of course he would invite his shareholders! Back then when I told Wooseokie that my dad got a job there, he said his grandfather had just bought some shares there! I asked what his name was, then I asked Dad about him… Guess what Dad said? Wooseokie’s grandfather didn’t just buy _some_ shares, but forty percent of shares! That means owning almost half of the company… That man is really good at market analysis, he’s a renowned share trader who has invested in many big companies.”

Eventually, Jinhee came to a realization as she processed the information, linking it to every piece stored in her memory. “His grandfather is wealthy… his uncle too… but his parents went bankrupt, and he was sent away to live with his uncle… His grandfather could’ve helped them! If he really had money, it didn’t have to go that way, did it? Wooseok’s parents could’ve borrowed money from either his grandfather or his uncle instead of sending him away!” She paused when an idea popped out in her head. “We can ask for his help now, though? We can tell him about Wooseok’s condition… This is a chance to help him!”

As soon as Jinhee got up from her seat, ready to turn and run after the old man, Doyeon caught her by the wrist. “Wait, no!”

Jinhee shifted her gaze back and forth between Doyeon and the man who was slowly walking away. “Why not? What’s the matter?? Look, he’s leaving!”

“He doesn’t care!” Doyeon’s voice became stern, and Jinhee froze. “He’s always favored Wooseok’s uncle more than his father, that’s why he didn’t help them! He wouldn’t believe anything bad you say about his favorite son! If you think Wooseok’s uncle’s wealth came from his own hard work, that’s far from the truth… Even on his twenty-first birthday, he got a huge sum of money as a present, and on his wedding, he got a house from the grandfather! The big house where Wooseok lives with him, if he hasn’t moved since I left. That’s how much his grandfather cares for his uncle. While his father… He was deemed a failure as the oldest son. Wooseokie said his grandfather always acted like they didn’t exist, as if he only had one child. I’m sorry, you can’t expect any help from him.”

“You’re right.” Jinhee nodded. “What’s his grandfather’s name again?”

Doyeon tried to recall. “Kim… Kim Youngsik.”

“Okay. You can let go of me now.” Jinhee smiled.

As soon as Doyeon let go of her wrist, though, Jinhee turned on her heels and bolted towards the grandfather, leaving the other three teenagers stupefied.

“Wait, Sir! Mr. Kim Youngsik!” Jinhee called and waved her hand in the air, not minding the amount of attention she got from the sea of people around her.

The man next to Wooseok’s grandfather stopped and turned his head around, looking for the source of the voice.

“Why aren’t we moving, Taejun?” the grandfather asked.

“I heard someone call your name, Sir. It is a lady’s voice.” The handsome man in his early thirties continued to fly his gaze around.

“I do not want to be interiewed right now, Taejun. I want to use the toilet,” the elderly man said, irritated.

The assistant – Taejun, as he was called – then spotted the girl in a navy blue dress running towards them.

“I believe her intention is not to interview you, Sir. She seems a little too young to work for a media company,” Taejun said.

Right when the grandfather turned around out of curiosity, Jinhee stopped in front of them and bowed immediately.

“I apologize for bothering you, my name is Cha Jinhee!” She straightened her back and gulped down all her nervousness. “If you don’t mind me asking, do you have any grandchildren, Sir?”

The old man then squinted at his assistant. “I thought you said she was not going to interview me.”

Taejun raised his hands in front of his chest, pleading guilty. “I apologize, Miss, Mr. Kim Youngsik cannot be bothered right now.”

“Five minutes, please?” Jinhee begged with puppy eyes. “This is _really_ important.”

Taejun asked for his boss’ approval, which he got in form of an incoherent grumble. “Okay, five minutes straight, starting from now,” the assistant cued.

“T-Thank you!” Jinhee bowed again. “So… Do you have any grandchildren?” she repeated the question carefully in anticipation.

Sulking, the old man answered in a harsh tone. “Yes, one grandson. Why does it matter to you?”

Despite the cold answer, Jinhee’s face and mood lit up altogether. “Do you remember his name, Sir?” _He doesn’t deny Wooseok’s existence! I’ve got to keep my hopes up!_

Now, the displeasure was clearly written on the grandfather’s scowling face. “I don’t. I haven’t seen the boy in years. Are you done?”

“I remember,” Taejun intervened, “his name is Kim Wooseok.”

A part of Jinhee was hurt to hear that the grandfather didn’t even remember Wooseok’s name, yet the new hope that arose because of the assistant was much bigger than that.

The wealthy man didn’t seem too happy about his assistant knowing more than he did. “That’s it, I’m done here. I need to use the toilet!” he said grumpily.

“Wait, Sir!” Jinhee reached out her hand towards the elderly’s back. “I’m Wooseok’s friend! I asked those questions just to make sure you still remember him… Wooseok is sick. He needs help.”

The old man looked over his shoulder at the fidgety girl. “How is that my concern? He has his parents and his uncle to take care of him, that should be adequate.”

“No, Sir… He—”

“It is not my concern!” the grandfather stomped his walking stick on the floor, causing Jinhee to flinch out of surprise.

Still, she remained unwavering. “It should be… because he’s the only one to continue your bloodline. I apologize if I come off as presumptuous to you, but it is the truth. If something bad happens to him, your bloodline ends there. He is an amazing person, so smart and talented, you should be proud of him, he deserves his grandfather’s love.”

Jinhee thought she might know then where Wooseok’s uncle had gotten his cold heart from when the grandfather walked away, as if he hadn’t heard a single word coming out of her mouth.

“Let’s go, Taejun.”

The assistant gave Jinhee an apologetic bow before turning around and following the older towards the restroom.

Despite feeling dejected and broken for Wooseok, still, Jinhee managed to catch something – a familiar name.

_Taejun… His name is Taejun? It’s the same name as Wooseok’s new alter, and this man knows Wooseok too... It can’t be just a coincidence… right? Like Kim Doyeon and Son Doyeon. If Wooseok could remember this man’s name, he must know more than just Wooseok’s name!_

More realization filled her mind, like many light bulbs lighting up one by one around her, wiping the darkness away. Her feet then carried her on autopilot, tailing the tall man in suit, until he stopped outside the male restroom. Jinhee hid behind a pillar.

“I can go on my own.” Kim Youngsik motioned his stick towards the younger male, telling him to stay and wait outside. The personal assistant responded with a bow.

_Yoo Taejun is a caretaker alter, and this Taejun seems to be a personal assistant. He takes care of Wooseok’s grandfather. Could it be that he once took care of Wooseok too? I must talk to him… Now!_

Jinhee came out of her hiding spot, and as if she was right away caught in the assistant’s radar, he turned his head towards her and calmly watched her come to him.

“Can I help you, Miss?” Taejun asked, looking down at the girl who seemed so small standing before his tall, lean, muscular build.

“Please, let me talk to you,” Jinhee begged.

Taejun took a quick peek into the male restroom before answering with a nod. “We have around three minutes.”

_That’s so short! No, no, there’s no time to complain._ Jinhee worked her mind to quickly sort the important questions she had to ask.

“Your name is Taejun?” she decided to make sure she had heard correctly before anything else.

The man nodded. “Lee Taejun.”

“So, you know Wooseok… How close are you to him?” Jinhee asked, every so often glancing to the restroom’s entrance, making sure it wasn’t Wooseok’s grandfather who came out.

“Almost like strangers now, I believe he doesn’t remember much about me. Last time I met him was four years ago. However, we were closer when he was four to six years old. His parents still lived in Seoul, both were very busy working, dropped Wooseok by at his grandfather’s house every morning, picked him up at night. I took care of him, except when his uncle was at home and not at his apartment. He would tell me to leave Wooseok to him and do other tasks for him,” Taejun spoke rapidly, in case there were more questions coming in their precious three minutes.

Jinhee could barely keep up with the pace. But she caught the fishy part. “Was there anything suspicious to you?” she asked again.

From the way Taejun’s expression transitioned from flat to somewhat uneasy, Jinhee knew there was something unsettling indeed.

“Honestly, many things, Miss. Wooseok didn’t seem to like his uncle. After spending a day playing in his uncle’s room, he always seemed upset. But as a twenty-year-old servant that time I did not have the courage to find out why. The door was always locked and I could not hear anything besides loud children songs. Moreover, Wooseok’s grandfather was seldom at home. As Mr. Kim Youngsik trusted his son very much, he never questioned anything related to babysitting Wooseok. But several months after Wooseok had turned six years old, he moved with his parents to Daejeon, his mother’s hometown. I had not heard a word about him for three years until he moved back to live with his uncle in Seoul, after his uncle had gotten married and owned a house.”

_This man is really the key. I need to find a way to contact him again!_

In the midst of the chaos storming inside her mind, Jinhee’s wild instinct arose and took over; she snatched the pen in the pocket of Taejun’s suit, grabbed his hand and yanked his glove off, then scribbled her own phone number on his palm. The assistant was too baffled to react.

“I’m so sorry for being rude and disrespectful, but this is my number, please, _please_ contact me for Wooseok’s sake. He’s abused by his uncle and he has a mental disorder now, you must believe me. You knew there was something wrong. He remembers you, he created a person named Taejun inside him to take care of him because no one else takes care of him. Listen to your conscience, I beg you.”

Jinhee let go of Taejun’s hand as if it was burning hot the moment she caught a glimpse of the grandfather coming out of the restroom. Still dumbfounded, the assistant slipped his pen back into his pocket and discreetly put his glove back on, covering the scribbled phone number on his palm.

“Why are you still here?” the elderly man frowned at Jinhee. “I will say this once more and for the last time, that boy is none of my concern! I do not care what you have to say about him! Tch, teenagers these days…”

_Why… Why are you so cold-hearted?_ It didn’t feel right to Jinhee; it didn’t feel right to let that chance slip away. At the same time, she saw a wall taller and thicker than any walls she had faced before – even more than Wooseok’s wall.

“Please consider checking on your grandson…” Jinhee bowed. The moment she raised her head again, a teardrop fell down her cheek. “Thank you, Sir.”

The brokenhearted teen turned on her heels and ran away, feeling shattered and rejected, not for herself, but for her love.

“Noona! Noona, what happened??”

Finally spotting his sister after searching frantically though the crowd, Junho came running and caught her in his arms, Doyeon and Dongpyo catching up shortly after.

“Did you talk to that old man??” Dongpyo asked.

“You’re really crazy, Cha Jinhee, that was so daring,” Doyeon said.

Jinhee gave no responses to any of their questions and buried her face on Junho’s shoulder. Before that day, she would have never come up to a stranger, not to mention a prominent person, and insistently bug them with such prying questions. She would have never dared write her phone number on a stranger’s hand, because Cha Jinhee was just a shy teenage girl who secretly disliked social settings like this. Before that day, she had always thought that the worst rejection she could face would come from Wooseok – or specifically, from Wooshin. Apart from his cold shoulder, his cold eyes that used to be playful and flirty, Jinhee had never faced any other major rejection in her life. Even in this situation, she was not the one who was forgotten, abandoned, pushed away, and yet, the pain came to her as a great shock, as if it all happened to her and not someone else. This was Jinhee being exposed to the more bitter side of life, directly, for the first time – because of the boy she held dearly as a big chunk of her heart. What hurt him would surely hurt her too.

She was just grateful that he was not there to hear those hurtful words and feel the pain himself.

“Jinhee…” Doyeon paced back and forth restlessly, stopped, and heaved a deep sigh. “Seeing you try that hard makes me feel bad for not taking part in this while I know what he’s going through. I will… I will see what I can do to help, okay? But… can I have his phone number?”

* * *

Wooshin had spent an hour on the computer in the study room. To do a research for his summer homework; that was his excuse to get the permission from Wooseok’s uncle to use the device. And he did browse a few pages related to art, just to leave some traces in the browser’s history, which the uncle would certainly check later. But really, most of the time was spent browsing on incognito tabs, multiple tabs of contents revolving around one major topic; his disorder.

It had only been two days since he had returned from the summer trip, yet a few episodes of drama had occurred in their internal world. Even though Wooshin was not even the original owner of the body, just a protector and a co-host, he was pretty sure he was suffering more than Wooseok was. He hated to be the one in charge, the only one who could communicate with _all_ alters – with the exception of their old prosecutor, Shin, who was strangely still in there but inaccessible and isolated. The new additions did not help him much, as they only created more noises inside the head. Then that they had two females, things were even more dramatic than ever.

As if it wasn’t enough, a newcomer had joined them following the summer trip.

So there he was, learning about all the uncontrollable splits. He needed them to stop splitting like some bacteria. But of course, a solution to that could not be found as easy as finding his Maths homework’s answer key on Google.

After clicking and scrolling for what seemed like forever, he came to one conclusion: they needed external help. Which they couldn’t get, so he was doomed.

Wooshin slammed his elbows onto the desk and messed his hair out of frustration.

_“Take a break, Wooshin.”_

It was Taejun’s voice, then close to the front, sharing co-consciousness. Right, at least the noise that came from this alter was a nice noise, Wooshin thought. The caretaker was even good at pretending to be Wooseok around his uncle, and fortunately for him, the man had done no physical harm to him so far.

Furiously, Wooshin smashed his finger on the mouse, closing all tabs but one. A list of emails were then displayed on the screen. He sighed.

Six new emails from username _Cha Jinny_ since two days before; one just an hour after going back home from the trip, one later on the same day, three on the following day, and one that day, just three hours ago. He had opened none of them – both because Taejun and Wooseok had been fronting the previous day and because he didn’t want to, although the latest mail’s subject managed to pique his curiosity.

_“I’m finding a way to help you, stay safe”_

Wooshin was holding onto every string of his self-control not to open that mail. He and Wooseok had agreed not to start something that might eventually go out of hand.

Instead of opening it, though, he clicked the refresh button, in case she had sent another message with a clue in the subject.

Indeed, there was another new mail that had just been received two minutes before. But it was nothing close to what he had expected; the sender’s name and the subject struck his heart with a massive shock, wiping all the colors off his baffled face.

_Son Doyeon_

_“Long time no see, I’m in Seoul, let’s meet up”_

“No way.” Wooshin gawked at the screen and clutched his hair. “This is impossible… No way she could find the nerd’s email. I must be high on something, that mad demon must’ve drugged me.”

He slapped himself across the face back and forth and smashed the refresh button. Of course, the mail was still there, displayed in bold font, tempting him to open it right away.

So he did. Flashbacks came rushing in like a flash flood as he read the long message.

_“Hi, Wooseokie, Wooshinie, and everyone else in there ^^_

_Before anything, I want to say sorry from the bottom of my heart for leaving you and cutting off all contact… Please understand that things weren’t easy for me either. I didn’t stay in Busan for long… Do you still remember that my mother used to live in Canada? She brought me along to Vancouver once I graduated from middle school. It would’ve been harder if we had stayed in touch… at least to me. I’m sorry for being so selfish. Right now I’m staying at my father’s house until the next seven weeks. Would it be too much if I expect to see you? It’s been so long! I miss you sooo much. :(_

_But there is something much more important. Yesterday I went to a wedding of my father’s colleague, and guess who I met? Cha Jinhee!!”_

Wooshin stopped reading, his eyes widened double times at the name, and his heart began to palpitate. He remembered Jinhee telling about her holiday plans that last night of the summer trip, including the mention of her aunt’s wedding party.

_Impossible… This is impossible._

Suddenly Wooshin had a bad feeling that made his skin crawl. Blinking to clear his blurry sight, he continued to read.

_“I heard someone call her name, that’s how I found her. I remember once Wooshinie told me that she was pretty… She’s pretty indeed, and her brother too. But not just that. She’s really, really bold and fearless, it’s insane!_

_I don’t know how to put this in a way that won’t shock you too much, but… we ran into your grandfather and Jinhee talked to him and his assistant named Lee Taejun about you and she gave her phone number to Taejun and I guess she’s going to do something to help you out, but we can’t be sure until Taejun contacts her first. I wasn’t there when she talked to your grandfather… I don’t know what they said, but she came back crying.”_

Wooshin’s breath got caught in his throat. His bad feeling intensified and he began to feel lightheaded.

_“There are too many things I want to say, but I can’t pour everything here, it’ll be soooo long. Let me know if you don’t mind seeing me in person, okay? We can meet at a café or somewhere comfortable, whenever you’re ready ^^ For the meantime, I hope you can talk to Jinhee too… Even though I’ve just met her, I can see that you mean a lot to her.”_

The encounter of Cha Jinhee, Son Doyeon, Wooseok’s grandfather and his childhood caretaker all at the same time and place – to Wooshin, it was like a ticking time bomb that had been specially designed just to blow him up.

_“Check Jinhee’s mail too, open it,”_ Taejun’s voice urged him, _“there must be something important in there, we need to hear from her side too! Come on, you don’t have to reply.”_

For once, Wooshin listened to the other voice inside the head. He closed Doyeon’s mail, and just as he opened the one right beneath it, both longing and fear filled his heart to the brim.

_“Wooseok/Wooshin, I don’t know if you’re intentionally ignoring me, but I’ll keep on spamming you anyway._

_Yesterday I met Son Doyeon at my aunt’s wedding. Right, your Son Doyeon, I couldn’t believe it either. She asked for your number, but I gave her your email address instead since you don’t have a phone. I guess she’s sent you a mail already. If not, I was just as surprised as you may be right now._

_I’m really glad that I met her, though, because she saw someone familiar and knew that it was your grandpa… So I could talk to him. I’ve heard from Doyeon about how your grandpa treats your dad and your uncle. Things seem so unfair, actually, it’s kinda similar how your grandpa gave your uncle a house and how my grandpa gave my dad a house, except that your uncle continues to get what he wants while my dad gets hate from his brothers and my cousins for getting the special treatment. I thought maybe your grandpa would be the one who could save you from your uncle… But seems like he’s a busy person who has so much to remember, isn’t he? It’s alright… Please don’t be sad about him. I’ve figured out that the key must be his assistant instead._

_Do you remember Lee Taejun? I managed to get important clues from him in a really short time. He said he had taken care of you from when you were four until you were six. He also said that your uncle used to tell him to leave you to him whenever he was at home, he kept you with him in his locked room and played children songs loudly so Taejun couldn’t hear anything, and you always seemed upset after. I thought maybe you should know about this… I’m sorry if this gives you bad flashbacks, but you know what’s fishy, right? Taejun found it suspicious too._

_Wooseok/Wooshin, what he did was a child crime. Even now you’re not an adult yet and he still does that crime, we can put him in jail for that! We have more witnesses now, if we can get Taejun to help us. Doyeon too, while she’s here, because she knows all that happened to you in middle school. Don’t you think these people show up again now for a reason? Please… What are you so afraid of?_

_My biggest hope now is Lee Taejun. I’ve told him a little about your condition, so I really hope he’d contact me soon… but, after thinking last night, maybe I was reckless too. The only way your grandpa could hear from you is by contacting your uncle… that could be a problem if he suddenly calls and asks about you, no? If your uncle gets mad and something happens, I’m really, really sorry… I’m not gonna forgive myself if you get hurt. Please stay safe…_

_Still waiting for your reply._

_♡”_

Just as Wooshin finished reading, the voice he loathed the most could be heard outside, in the living room.

“Yes, father, I am doing well! I am thriving at my job. …Huh? The boy? Do you mean… Wooseok?”

The color drained from Wooshin’s face. With a trembling hand, quickly he closed the browser, shut the computer down, and made his way out of the room. The uncle’s gaze immediately flicked towards him as soon as he stepped out.

_“Calm down, calm down, don’t run! Act like you don’t know anything!”_ Taejun instructed.

_I’m scared… I’m scared._

Wooshin, who had never let himself look weak to the other alters, was then clinging onto the caretaker’s voice like it was the only one who could protect him.

_“We’re going to be fine, it’s okay, you didn’t do anything wrong… Even if he gets mad, we’ll be fine again later. Now hurry and go to your room, but don’t run!”_ Taejun said.

Wooshin did as he was told to, trying his best not to make an eye contact with the man.

“He is perfectly healthy, father. Do not worry about him,” Wooseok’s uncle continued to talk on the phone. Contrary to his warm tone, his expression and his stare on his nephew was as sharp and cold as an icycle. “No, no, father… I can handle everything, no need for a maid.”

Wooshin sneaked into his room, quietly shut and locked the door. The poor terrified boy had his hands sweating and his heart pounding in his chest. He hurried to his bed and hid himself under the cover, curling into a ball.

_“Wooshin… Wooshinie, it’s okay. I’m still here with you.”_

Wooshin let his eyes flutter closed as he breathed out a shaky sigh, sinking into the soothing voice. He began to fantasize a pair of arms holding him close, a gentle hand caressing his hair, a warm body shielding him from everything that frightened him – just like how a young man had held the sad little Wooseok years ago, a foregone memory that he had no access to.

_Lee Taejun… It’s the guy who came with grandpa here long ago. He talked to me, but I didn’t know who he was._

_“He’s in Woo’s memory,” the caretaker alter said, “he has mentioned him before. But… after you read Jinhee’s mail, I guess I’m getting glimpses of those memories…”_

Taejun’s voice faded away, and then it was silent.

Until a loud banging on the door made Wooshin jolt up to a sitting position out of great shock.

_Taejun… Yoo Taejun, are you there?_

“Open the door!” The furious man outside yelled and continued to slam his fist on the door.

Wooshin was shaking. Beads of sweat were seeping out on his temples. At this point, he was scared not only for himself, but also for Jinhee – what if his grandfather had mentioned her on that phone call? He certainly had, hadn’t he? Then his uncle would think that he had been telling Jinhee everything all this time, while in fact he had suffered so much in order to keep himself away from her. Even if he told the truth, his uncle would not believe him.

Mentally preparing himself for what was about to come, Wooshin gulped down his fear and went to the door. He was immediately grabbed by the neck as soon as he made way for the demon to enter.

“What did you do?!” the man kicked the door shut and slammed the choking boy against the hard surface.

“I—I didn’t… do anything—” the teen wheezed struggling to catch his breath and pry the strong fingers off his neck.

“You dare lie to me?? You little bastard!” The rough hand released Wooshin’s neck just to grab a fistful of his hair and slam his head onto the door. The boy cried out in pain and clutched on his pounding head as spots of light filled his sight from the collision.

“I swear! I didn’t do anything!” the face that was full of rage then became blurrier in Wooshin’s eyes. The strong protector alter had never cried just from this kind of pain before, it wasn’t much compared to all the abusive treatments he had received through the years – but somehow, now he felt so tired and hurt. When the raging man’s hand hit his face in a big slap, his tears fell freely, and when he was thrown to his bed, his sobs broke, loud and heart-wrenching like those of a child.

“You told my father, didn’t you?? Who helped you?! Say it!” the uncle pinned Wooshin down by the neck and screamed in his face.

“I didn’t tell him anything… I swear—”

Wooshin’s words were cut by another slap across his face.

“Tell the truth or I’ll finish you here!!”

No more words were uttered by the boy, for he was too hurt to speak. He could do nothing but cry. At least, there was still a hint of relief in his heart; his uncle didn’t know who had talked to his grandfather. Jinhee hadn’t been mentioned on that phone call. At least, she was safe.

“TALK!!”

Getting only silence, the infuriated man went on rampage and began to shower the teen’s frail body and face with hard blows that made his agonizing cries grow even louder.

“Stop! Please stop! Please—I’m sorry!”

The next time a fist landed on his cheekbone, Wooshin squeezed his eyes shut, and his cries stopped altogether. The punches didn’t stop coming, at this point, the monster was completely blinded by his anger.

“…Stop!”

A hit on the stomach.

“I said stop!”

Another blow to the face.

All of a sudden, the boy’s eyes popped open and his sharp, furious gaze fell straight on the face of the man straddling him like an untamed animal.

“Are you deaf, you asshole?”

A very deep voice, deep as the ocean. He lifted his fist and showed it to the older male’s face; in a single powerful swing, he sent the other’s whole body rolling to the side and off the bed, hitting the bedside table in the process.

Calmly he peeled himself off the mattress and got up onto his feet. Wiping the blood off his lip with the back of his hand, he shot a cynical, disgusted look at the unconscious body laid on the floor.

“When I say stop, you’d better stop.”

This was the new voice that Wooshin had heard on the summer trip – he had finally made his way out for the first time ever, coming to life as yet another cold, powerful alter.

But he was lost.

Turning his head around, he scratched his head and mumbled, “What do I do now?”

He ended up dragging the idle body out the room and down the stairs. After walking around opening and closing doors, he found a bedroom – the uncle’s bedroom – so he moved the unconscious man there and tossed him onto the bed like a huge bag of rubbish.

On his way out, though, he spotted a wallet laid on the bedside table.

“Hmm. Let’s see what you’ve got there.”

A smirk found its way to his lips when he found a big sum of money inside the wallet.

“You won’t notice a few missing bills,” he mumbled as he yanked out three pieces of 50,000-won bills and slipped them into the pocket of his shorts. “You’re heavy, gotta pay me for the delivery service. You’re welcome.”

Not sure what else to do, he returned to where he had come from and decided to just lie in bed so he could sink in his confusion.

When he passed by the full-length mirror in the room, though, his steps came to an abrupt halt and a quiet startled gasp left his mouth.

“I… I look different.”

The new alter proceeded to explore the body he was in, touching the face, lifting the shirt to check his torso. It definitely did not look any close to his own image that he knew.

“…An underweight teenager’s body… Of course.”

Unhappy with what he was looking at, he left the mirror and went to the bed, lay down and stared at the blank ceiling. Then he bounced his head on the pillow a few times, feeling something hard propping his head unevenly.

_Hmm… There’s something under the pillow._

The alter lifted the pillow and found nothing beneath it, yet he noticed something bulging inside the pillowcase – a book.

“Not well hidden.” Thinking of how the person who had hidden the book there must have been lazy, or careless, or somewhat foolish, he pulled it out and flipped the black leather cover open, revealing the title page.

_“DID Journal_

_Belongs to:_

_Kim Wooseok – Kim Wooshin – Woo – Shin – Kim Doyeon – Yoo Taejun – Bae Jaemi – …..”_

The strikingly different handwritings indicated that the names were clearly written by two different people; one had written from Wooseok’s name until Shin’s name, and the rest by another person, looking like they had been added later at different times.

The new alter noticed that there were ten tabs dividing the pages, seven of which had been filled in with a name. He checked every first page of the sections that contained personal information of each person – complete information of Wooseok and Wooshin, yet very little about the last two people. To the latest newcomer, the highlight was on the first three rows – name, birth date, and _role._

_Name: Kim Wooseok_

_Birth date: 1996-10-27_

_Role: host, original identity_

_Name: Kim Wooshin_

_Birth date: 1996-12-10_

_Role: ~~body owner~~ primary protector, co-host_

_Name: Woo_

_Birth date: ?? (6 years old this year, 2013)_

_Role: child/little, trauma holder_

_Name: Shin_

_Birth date: 1985_

_Role: persecutor protector_

_Name: Kim Doyeon_

_Birth date: 1997-03-15_

_Role: ? (I just want to have fun and find love!)_

_Name: Yoo Taejun_

_Birth date: 1994-11-24_

_Role: caretaker_

_Name: Bae Jaemi/Bae Yoojin_

_Birth date:_

_Role: sexual protector_

The new alter flipped through the pages for a quick scan, and stopped on a particular page in Wooshin’s section – there were drawings of seven people standing in a row, colored using colored pencils, and a name under each of them.

Wooseok looked exactly like the body’s face, wearing a pair of nerdy glasses and a neat school uniform. Wooshin had somewhat shorter, messier, rather spiky hair, his eyes were cold and nonchalant, and his sporty clothes were all black. He appeared to be a bit shorter than Wooseok in the sketch. Woo was depicted as a beaming little boy with adorable curly hair and round shiny eyes, holding a fox plushie in one hand and Shin’s index finger in another hand. Shin, his father in the inner world, was big and tall. Wooshin had drawn him with an angry face that looked funny instead of scary. He wore a black leather jacket, and his long bangs were pushed back with a few strands left hanging. Next to him was a girl in a light purple sleeveless dress, posing cheekily, a hand on her hip and another making a peace sign next to her bright smile. Her long reddish brown hair was tied into loose, low pigtails. Taejun the caretaker was portrayed as a delicate-looking boy, wearing a denim overall, round glasses, and a straw hat, holding a potted plant in his hands. He almost looked like a farmer boy. Bae Jaemi’s aura was totally the opposite to his innocent vibe. She was a bold, seductive woman in a revealing mini black dress. Her red wine hair didn’t reach past her narrow shoulders, and her full lips weren’t less red than her locks. Wooshin had even added extra detail in her smokey-eye makeup. There was a big round earring hanging on her left ear, and a choker on her slender neck.

“Nice. Draw me too later.” The new male alter scanned around the room until he saw a pen laid on the desk. He grabbed it and returned to the title page.

“I can write my name myself,” he muttered as he wrote next to Jaemi’s name – a very neat, beautiful handwriting.

_Bae Hyunjin._

He claimed the empty section after Jaemi’s, which was still untouched by the woman herself. After adding his name on the tab, he began to write about himself, in the same format as the one that Wooseok and Wooshin had used for themselves and everyone else.

_“Name: Bae Hyunjin_

_Birth date: 1992-02-02_

_Role: gatekeeper_

_Origin: Kim Wooseok’s split_

_Physical appearance:_

  * _+/- 180 cm_
  * _+/- 70 kg_
  * _Black hair_
  * _Glasses_
  * _Average university student look_
  * _Handsome and charming (a fact)_



_Favorites: books, games, music, beer & chicken feet_

_Purposes/goals: memory filing & sorting, gatekeeping, keeping things in order, getting rich_

_Relationship with other alter: Bae Yoojin’s younger brother”_

Bae Hyunjin, the system’s new gatekeeper who had split off of Wooseok himself – yet another alter who was certain about his identity and the purpose he had to serve.

He flipped the page and wrote his very first, very short entry.

_“Today I knocked the man out and earned some pocket money.”_

The corner of his lips tugged up into a smug, satisfied smirk. He liked how he sounded tough in that simple sentence.

“Now, let’s see how things have been going.” The gatekeeper proceeded to examine the past written interactions between Wooseok, Wooshin, and Woo, including the messages Woo had left on Shin’s page. The last message had been left three months before. The brand new six-year-old Woo could not have possibly written an entry in the shared journal. Perhaps he could not even write yet. The rest of his pages should have been left blank, if not filled with words from the older alters. With that in mind, Hyunjin kept that part to be checked the last.

And yet, how surprised he was when he found a very unexpected message on Woo’s latest page; a message that hadn’t even been discovered by Wooseok and Wooshin.

_“Hello, Woo… Hyung is here now. Did you miss me?_

_-Moon Hyunwoo-“_

The old suicidal boy was back to join the fun.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**

I'll show this pic again here, just as a depiction of those 3 new alters :D (Yoo Taejun: Top left, Bae Jaemi: bottom left, Bae Hyunjin: right)

****

Why Hyunjin? Because TWENTY TWENTY! :)) I'm SO excited for his web drama omg did anyone see Playlist's instagram post in which Wooseok chugged down a big glass of beer? I THOUGHT THE GUY KISSING IN THE FIRST CUT WAS HIM JDJDSJKSJFDFJLS anyways he said there may or may not be a kiss scene so let's see how it'll turn out HAHA if there really is, I can see him yelling into his hands and turning red like a crab after the shoot lmaooo but lucky girl I swear--

:)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For the next chapter, I'll also say that there may or may not be a kiss scene lol it's going to be a little complicated and dramatic in the next few chapters  
> About Son Doyeon's mail, do you think Wooseok/Wooshin would open up to her again and agree to meet up?  
> Also, Jinhee's birthday was around the corner, just two weeks before Wooseok's. Would there be something special or would they keep a safe distance to prevent something bad?  
> Find out in the next update, so please wait for it! Thank you for reading this story and leaving kudos too ^^


	20. Chapter 20

* * *

When it came to art, Wooseok and Wooshin’s skills and creativity were unquestionable. Even their classmates – who normally either ignored their existence or made fun of them – also acknowledged the talent, hence why it was not at all unexpected when Wooseok came to school carrying a masterpiece that was his summer art homework, catching an abundant amount of attention all the way from home to his classroom.

It was a big box-shaped diorama, a three-dimensional model of a gushing river in the woods, made out of turqoise-colored resin to look like realistic, transparent water. The biggest portion of the model was the fake water itself, displaying and emphasizing on the main story that happened beneath the surface. There was a realistic clay sculpture of a boy under the water, looking like he was drowning, yet one of his hands was holding onto a heart that was afloat above him – not a simple heart shape, but a lifelike organ, as if it had come out of his hollow chest. Half of the heart emerged on the surface, and his gaze was set on it, seeming to be hopeful that it might save him. The closer it was to the bottom part, the darker the water was. Underneath, there were sharp-edged big rocks and scary-looking fish that certainly would not be found in the actual river, but they were there as a representation of the horrible things found in the darkness waiting to engulf him. Antithetical to the grim aspect of the piece, everything above in the light was beautiful and bright; the grassy land, the lush trees and their leaves in vibrant shades of green, the miniature deer and squirrels, the little wildflowers – pink, purple, and white wildflowers. It was a stunning forest that looked like a scene in a Disney movie. The diorama was clearly based on Wooshin’s experience, but what no one knew was that he had worked together so well with Wooseok for the first time ever, sharing the full story with him and conveying his emotions linked to that incident through written paragraphs, even being co-conscious with him – both present at the same time – while doing the project. Their communication as well as their overall relationship had improved so much in the past one month, thanks to the art project that had somehow been like a therapy for them and their mental peace.

Jinhee goggled at the piece of art sitting on her chairmate’s desk, then looked at her own homework, an oil painting on a canvas – a painting of a glowing little fairy in a beautiful forest, kneeling on the grass by a magnificent waterfall, beaming as she gazed fondly at a blooming daisy that grew from a shining heart planted deep in the ground. Unlike the heart in Wooseok’s diorama, the heart in Jinhee’s painting wasn’t literally an organ, but just a simple heart shape, nicely painted and shaded in red. Still, the similarity wasn’t left unnoticed by their dear friends, Seungyoun and Yeonwoo.

“Cute coincidence! They both put a heart in their work!” Yeonwoo said, giggling and clapping so joyfully like she had just seen her favorite pair in her favorite drama finally kiss.

“Or… is it really a coincidence?” Seungyoun wiggled his eyebrows and flashed a teasing smirk.

“Ah… They’re different hearts.” Finding her chairmate’s lack of response quite awkward and uncomfortable, Jinhee gave a rather bashful and modest response. “I didn’t have enough time to make anything impressing. Wooseok’s work is much better.”

Hearing the mention of his name, the boy next to her, who had been zoning out, shifted his gaze from his own work to hers. To their surprise, he smiled.

“Your work is impressing,” he said, “it’s a beautiful painting.”

The other three sitting around him looked at each other wide-eyed in disbelief.

“T-Thank you.” Jinhee bowed a little in her seat, assuming that it must have been one of Wooseok’s alter instead of the boy himself, because he wouldn’t have talked to her – not to mention praised her homework. “I’m sorry, but… w-who are you?”

Her chairmate made a puzzled face. “What do you mean? I’m… I’m Wooseok. Kim Wooseok.”

Seungyoun let out a horrified gasp, and then whispered to his girlfriend, “Something must’ve happened to Wooseokie. He sounds different! What if… What if another split happened and changed him?? Or a fusion? Two alters can fuse together into one, right??”

Yeonwoo eyed Wooseok, finding his little smile suspicious. “Let’s watch him a little longer.”

That first day back to school, the teacher didn’t waste too much time on conversing with the students about the summer break. They needed a considerable amount of time for everyone’s turn to present their work to the class, so the middle-aged man began to call out his students one by one to the front, in a sequence based on the name list. Among the four – Jinhee, Wooseok, Seungyoun, and Yeonwoo – Wooseok was the first to do his presentation.

“Kim Wooseok?” the teacher called, peering through his glasses, searching for a raised hand.

“Yes, here.” Wooseok raised his hand and got up from his seat, calmly made his way to the front of the class with his diorama in his steady hold. There was a confident little smirk on his lips when he put the piece of art on the table provided and looked at his curious classmates.

He began to speak uncharacteristically, bold and poised, assertive tone and clear enunciation – unlike the Kim Wooseok they knew, who would fidget and stammer terribly when it came to public speaking.

“In a glimpse, I believe it is very obvious to everyone here that this piece is inspired by the incident that occurred on our summer trip, when I jumped into a river to save our friend Han Yeonwoo. Yes, that is what this work is based on, but the message hidden in it lies further, deeper than what is seen on the surface. Truth be told, it is almost too melancholic for me to explain, thus why I will put in a general, more relatable context for us all. Back when we were holding onto a rock, Han Yeonwoo told me to hold on, not only in that river, but also in my life. While working on this diorama, this thought came to me; the life we live is like a river that we sail on. Some parts of it are calm and steady, the other parts have such heavy currents that flip your small boat upside down, toss you away from that boat, and you can barely keep your head above the water. It is especially terrifying when you cannot swim and you do not know what lives under the water. You do not know what terrible things that may come and get you in the darkest moments of your life, you cannot see because it is dark. I portray those things as these unpleasant-looking fish and sharp rocks. But look, there are two sides of life. Up here, it is bright and beautiful, and in the middle, there is this heart. Half of it sees the light and another half sees the dark. This guy is drowning and holding onto his heart that had come out of his chest; it simply means that, you may feel like you have too many problems and your life is so miserable that you could die any given moment, but as long as your heart is still beating, you have to hold on, look up, and see that hope shine through the water. Just like this.”

He pressed a switch at the back of the glass box, and tiny yellow lights lit up in the diorama, all over the forest like twinkling fireflies, and around the heart in the water, its shine illuminating the boy’s face, reflected in his glossy eyes.

“Whoa! So cool!” The students sitting in the front rows leaned forward in attempt to get a closer look. One of them was the class president, a genius, pretty girl. Noticing the abundant curiosity displayed clearly on her face, Wooseok stifled a chuckle and smirked.

“Come, come forward and take a closer look if you want.” He waved his hand, confidently motioning his classmates to come forward, and then went to the light switch and darkened the room without even asking for the teacher’s permission. Not that the man seemed to mind – he joined the few students flocking around the diorama to admire it up close. It was even more enchanting in the dark.

Back in her seat, Jinhee contemplated coming forward, while Seungyoun was the first to launch himself to the front. Would Wooseok mind having her look at his art? Would he mind her standing close to him?

“Tsk, you’re overthinking.” Yeonwoo made the decision for her by dragging her along.

“This is so beautiful! It’s definitely going to make it to the year-end art exhibition, right, teacher?” Seungyoun asked the teacher. “The meaning is beautiful too… I think I cried a bit.”

“It may make it.” The teacher crossed his arms, nodded and smiled; a tiny proud smile. “But I am not the only one who will make the decision.”

“If that masterpiece doesn’t make it, my crappy work will end up in the trash.” Hangyul joked with his chairmate after returning to his seat.

“Okay, I think that is enough.” Wooseok clapped his hands twice. “We don’t have much time. I will end my presentation here, thank you, let’s move on.”

The whole class gaped at the unexpected dominance coming from their shy nerd.

“He’s… kinda hot when he’s confident like that.” Hangyul overheard the girl sitting two rows in front of him. “Gosh, I can’t believe I’ve just said that about Kim Wooseok!”

“That’s true, though,” her chairmate said, “I didn’t know he had this side. No wonder Jinhee likes him. He must be really bold in private.”

“Psh.” Hangyul chuckled quietly and shook his head. “You have no idea... So these girls like confidence, huh. I can be confident too.”

Jinhee had mixed feelings. First, she had nearly shed a tear due to the deep message that Wooseok had conveyed out loud, and then she was astonished by the strong, rather charming aura he exuded.

She might have just fallen _a tiny bit_ deeper for him.

Jinhee was still somewhat lost in her mind when it was her turn to showcase her painting.

“The meaning of this piece is fairly simple. This heart is planted in the ground. It is dark in there, it may even get cold, it’s not where it’s supposed to be. But there are things in life that come like magic, little joy found in little things, as represented by this fairy. We may not notice these things because it’s totally dark around us, but they’re still there. If we hold onto the hope that someday we will see the light, eventually, after going through such hard times, we will be able to grow and the beauty will show… like this blooming flower. You may not be aware it, but there is beauty in your growth that even other people can see someday, when they realize how much you have changed into a better person. It’s really just a coincidence, but this message is similar to Wooseok’s… When you are stuck in the dark, hold on and have hope, better days will come.”

Inadvertently, Jinhee’s gaze fell on Wooseok; he had his head down, yet his bitter smile could still be seen.

As soon as she went back to her seat, Yeonwoo gave her a proud pat on the head from behind.

“Why are their works so touching?” Yeonwoo choked out fake sob. “Such deep meanings, even related to each other! It’s not a coincidence, it’s what you call a destiny.”

Wooseok heaved a deep, silent sigh, and no more words came out of his mouth for the rest of the class.

While Jinhee didn’t do much about her suspicion towards her chairmate’s behaviour, the couple Seungyoun and Yeonwoo continued to fuss about it through messy written notes that they kept passing back and forth to each other – not because they were afraid of being scolded by the teacher for talking in class, since it was the transition to the next class anyway and the teacher wasn’t there yet, but because they didn’t want Wooseok to catch them whispering plans to test him. The next time Yeonwoo replied Seungyoun’s note with a few ideas, the latter beamed and rewarded his girlfriend with a pinch on the cheek.

“Wooseokie!” Seungyoun called, and the boy in front of him turned immediately, giving him a questioning look.

_That’s not like Wooseokie,_ Seungyoun noted, _he doesn’t usually respond on first call. He always avoids talking to us at all cost. Minus one point._

“Let’s have lunch together at the cafeteria later, how about that?” Seungyoun asked with a friendly grin.

“No, thanks,” Wooseok answered briefly.

_That does sound like Wooseokie,_ Seungyoun thought, _plus one point._

“Ah, okay then… I brought my mom’s homemade bread, though! I’ll share some with you anyway. I gave some to you once, remember?” Seungyoun asked again. Now, even Jinhee was aware that he was testing Wooseok – and so was Wooseok himself. The nerdy boy blinked slowly at the other’s innocent goofy smile, seeming to be choosing his words carefully.

“Yes, it was good. But no, thanks. I’ve got my own food.” This time, Wooseok ended the conversation ultimately by turning back facing the front.

“Wooseokie…” Refusing to give up, Seungyoun reached forward and gently held Wooseok’s shoulder. The smaller boy stiffened. Seungyoun stood up, leaned forward, and whispered in his ear, “I want to ask you something, but I don’t want these girls to hear. I’ll write it down, okay? Please answer.”

Seungyoun tore a paper out of his notebook, scribbled a message, and then passed it over Wooseok’s shoulder. Jinhee seemed curious, and Yeonwoo too, just that the latter’s curiosity was pretended.

_“Wooseokie, I’m planning on treating you all to a nice meal this weekend for my birthday. Actually my birthday has passed, it was on August 5, but you know. Summer break. Suggest some nice places/food?”_

Wooseok stared at the paper for a good minute before finally writing down his answer.

_“Chicken feet. Happy birthday.”_

Various expressions took turns playing on Seungyoun’s face when he read the reply, from the happiness from getting a birthday wish, to bewilderness due to the unusual food suggestion that was like an old man’s taste, to a shock when he realized that the handwriting was different – that was what he had intended to test by asking Wooseok to write.

It looked as if Wooseok had intentionally tried to make his handwriting look messy, like it usually was, but still it came out much neater and even rather pretty.

Either that Wooseok had really changed after a split or an integration during the summer break, or that it was not even him, but an alter pretending to be him.

Seungyoun slipped the paper back in his notebook, and for the last test, he leaned forward once again and threw his arms around Wooseok’s shoulders from behind.

“Thanks, Wooseokie,” he whispered again, “I’ll consider getting the chicken feet for you.”

Wooseok nodded awkwardly and glanced side to side, feeling some eyes watching them. “Now let go of me,” he mumbled, his voice going almost an octave lower.

“You don’t like this?” Seungyoun tightened his hold instead, a mischievous cheshire grin spreading across his face.

Wooseok shut his eyes and sucked in as much air as he could into his flared nostrils, obviously struggling to keep his patience. “When I say let go, you’d better let go.”

Seungyoun was dumbfounded by the dominance that was once again present in the other boy’s deep voice. Suddenly a horrifying thought came across his mind, _Has he fused together with Wooshinie??_

Wouldn’t it be a good thing if an integration really had happened? It would be one baby step closer to the complete integration into one intact person, Kim Wooseok only. But why did the thought of losing the cold and snappish Wooshin make Seungyoun a bit sad instead?

Seungyoun obliged the other boy and let go only when their English teacher barged in with a smile as bright as the morning sun. As soon as the young female dropped her stuff on the teacher’s desk, she waved a stack of papers in the air and piped up, “Get ready, it’s time for a quiz! Let’s see if you remember anything after your fun summer break!”

“Oh, man! A quiz on the first day?” The students whined.

English was one of Jinhee’s favorite subjects, so there were no complaints coming from her. Instead, she saw a chance as soon as she saw the paper – the same thing that Seungyoun had tested; Wooseok’s handwriting.

Careful not to be too obvious, Jinhee leaned to the side slowly, little by little, peeking at Wooseok’s paper. There was nothing on it yet. He grabbed his pen and got ready to write his name in the space on the top left corner.

And for once, he wasn’t careful – Instead of writing _Kim,_ he wrote _Bae,_ though he realized his mistake immediately and scratched it until it was fully covered, and wrote _Kim Wooseok_ next to it. Neat, small yet clear Korean letters, a beautiful handwriting.

Jinhee saw it all and kept it to herself.

While everyone else was halfway done, Wooseok put his pen down by his paper, as he had finished the whole forty questions like it was an elementary school homework.

Break time, Jinhee dragged Yeonwoo out of the classroom promptly after the class was dismissed.

“He’s not Wooseok!” Jinhee spilled out, “He’s Bae something!”

Yeonwoo gasped. “Your Bae??”

“I’m not joking!” Jinhee shot her best friend a look of disbelief.

“Oh, sorry, let me try again.” Yeonwoo repeated her dramatic gasp. “Bae Jaemi?? But he didn’t sound like a woman!”

“I don’t think it’s Jaemi.” Jinhee paced back and forth while she worked the gears in her mind. “Jaemi is a sexual alter, she speaks in a seductive way. This guy, I’m sure he’s a guy, is more like an intellectual of some sort. He spoke immaculately during his presentation and he finished that English quiz in a flash.”

“Ah, didn’t you say that Wooshin heard a new voice on the summer trip?” Yeonwoo snapped her fingers and pointed at the other. “It could’ve been him, a new alter! Why wouldn’t he reveal his identity, though? Doyeon and Taejun introduced themselves to us!”

“I know, right?” Jinhee said, “This guy is so mysterious. Maybe he’s afraid of being discovered? But he doesn’t seem like the type who gets scared easily.”

Yeonwoo nodded in agreement. “Almost like Wooshin, but with more charm and brain cells.”

“What do you mean?” Jinhee frowned. “Wooshin has brain cells.”

“Whoa, okay, wifey. I didn’t say he didn’t have any.” Yeonwoo giggled.

The girls hid behind the door and peeked into the classroom. To their surprise, they found Seungyoun handing his guitar – which he had used for his performance with Yeonwoo in the art class earlier – to Wooseok.

Or more accurately, to Bae Hyunjin.

“He can play the guitar?” Yeonwoo gasped. “Aww, look, he’s so charming.”

“Back off, you have Seungyounie.” Jinhee laughed.

Leaning back on the edge of his desk, Hyunjin held the guitar, placed his fingers on the fretboard, and began to pluck the strings randomly. Seungyoun watched him with expectant, sparkly wide eyes, somehow knowing he was going to hear something better than those random notes really soon.

And he really did. As the _Happy Birthday to You_ song was played so softly and slowly on the guitar, with an improvised chord progression that made it sound mellow and somehow nostalgic, the familiar melody had some heads turn to the two boys. Seungyoun’s mouth fell open wide in delight, then he covered his face like a shy lady seeing her man get down on one knee to propose.

“Seungyoun, is it your birthday today?” a female classmate asked.

“Ah, it’s—no, it was two weeks ago!” Seungyoun had a bashful grin spreading from ear to ear when his classmates who were still in the classroom came to him and wished him happy birthday. Once they had left for their break time, Hyunjin finished the song with a delicate strum and put the guitar aside. Seungyoun captured him into a tight big hug straight away.

“Thank you, Wooseokie. Do you know how much I love you? You’re the best friend I could ever ask for.” When he pulled back, his smiling eyes were glistening with happy tears. He gave his sincerest, biggest grin as a proof of his joy and love. “It’s so sad that you had to push us away, but now it’s okay. It’s okay as long as you’re still here.”

All the display of emotions was something Hyunjin could not comprehend. He wasn’t built to feel such strong feelings. As a gatekeeper who had to keep things in order, he had to be tough as nails; firm, hard-headed, unemotional, detached from others’ emotions.

“You’re on my important people list,” he said, and literally meant what he said – Wooseok and Wooshin had listed down a few names on the front page of their shared journal, even including drawings of those people’s faces, with a title of _“List of Important People not to Mess with”,_ so the other alters would refrain from causing trouble around those people. Needless to say, Jinhee and Seungyoun’s names were on top of the very short list.

“I’ll take that as _‘I love you too’._ ” Seungyoun chuckled. He proceeded to grab his bread from his bag and then stuffed a big piece of it into Hyunjin’s mouth, like what he had done on the very first day he had known Wooseok.

Taken aback, Hyunjin goggled at the taller boy, and began to munch the bread in his full mouth slowly.

“Do you like it?” Seungyoun asked. Getting a small, hesitant nod as the answer, he beamed and shoved his whole pack of bread into the other’s hands. “Here, you can have it all! Let’s eat together at the cafeteria, how about that?”

Hyunjin pulled the food out of his mouth and swallowed the big piece he had bitten off, choking a little. “No, I’ll head to the restroom. Been holding it in for half an hour.”

“Ah, okay! S-Sorry for holding you back.” Despite feeling a bit disappointed, with a smile permanently plastered on his face, Seungyoun watched the other boy leave without a word.

Jinhee and Yeonwoo panicked behind the door when they saw Hyunjin come.

“Quick, walk this way!” Yeonwoo pulled Jinhee to the left.

“No need to hide.” Hyunjin’s deep voice stopped them dead in their track. “I don’t bite.”

The girls turned their heads back, just to see the boy walk away calmly to the opposite direction, not letting them see his smirk.

Seungyoun came out shortly after, throwing his arms around Yeonwoo and Jinhee’s shoulders like a sugar daddy. “Ahh! Wooseokie played a happy birthday song for me! This is one of the best days of my life!”

“That’s not Wooseok, you know?” Jinhee cocked an eyebrow.

“I know, and it doesn’t matter! Everyone inside him is a part of him anyway,” Seungyoun said.

Letting those words sink in, Jinhee smiled to herself. “You’re right… If you put it like that, it doesn’t matter.”

Meanwhile, in the restroom, Hyunjin zoned out as he was using the urinal.

_“Do you know how much I love you? You’re the best friend I could ever ask for.”_

The gatekeeper alter stared blankly at the wall.

_We’re not loveless after all. It’s only at home where we can’t find love. ‘Home’… Funny how we have to call hell a home._

He blinked once, twice, and shook his head. Then he looked around.

“…Toilet at school.”

It was the primary protector’s turn to be in charge. Sighing, Wooshin finished his business quickly and left the restroom.

Whenever he came out to front, it felt like he had just woken up at a random place after a super deep sleep, or after passing out for a long time, having no clue of what day and time it was. It was not exactly a fun experience to him or any other alters; in fact, it was quite the contrary. Fronting at school didn’t make it any better.

“Kim Wooseok!”

A particular high-pitched male voice made him want to just drop to the floor and maybe pretend to die. Wooshin shut his eyes and exhaled a tired sigh when a big hand grabbed his shoulder from behind, turning him around. It was Seungwoo.

“Yes, sunbaenim. Do we still have a problem?” Wooshin asked monotonously.

“No, not at all.” Out of the blue, Seungwoo pulled the younger into a bone-crushing hug, successfully making him yelp like a puppy out of shock and fear. “You saved my baby sister’s life. I owe you so much now, the least I can offer is peace. I’ll never bring up the past from now on. Would you please forgive me?”

In all honesty, Wooshin was over it, but he knew well that it would definitely take some time until they could literally have that so-called _peace_. The scars were still there, even the smallest cuts couldn’t heal in a blink of an eye, not to mention a mental wound from months of violence. He’d still get scared by Seungwoo’s mere voice, he’d still feel like running away in his presence, but he wanted to try for the sake of his own mental peace.

“…Yes, sunbaenim.” Wooshin’s voice was muffled by Seungwoo’s chest. “But… please give me some space.”

Seungwoo released the other and let him catch his breath. “I’m sorry.” He chuckled. “Thank you, Wooseok… or is it Wooshin?”

Panting softly, Wooshin tried his best to suppress his smile. After such a long time, at last Seungwoo acknowledged his presence – as Wooshin, not Wooseok. After everything that Yeonwoo had told him, finally the senior understood the disorder, and Wooshin liked it that he didn’t seem to be judgemental about it. He didn’t insult him and call him crazy, like some others did.

“I’m Wooshin.”

“Well… Let’s get along, Wooshin.”

* * *

Six weeks. It took Wooseok six weeks to have the guts to finally start talking to her again.

The sky was turning from dark blue to black as Wooseok strode down the sidewalk, a lone soul in a bustling city. He was supposed to be heading home around this time, and trouble would surely be waiting at the door if he arrived late, but he had meticulously thought this through; perhaps half an hour was acceptable still. He could come up with an excuse. He had a bag of chicken feet in his hand, swinging back and forth as he picked up his pace – it was a meal from Seungyoun, as Wooseok would not be able to come along to his late birthday lunch the next day, because he was just a prisoner in hell and the demon had reserved his weekends – even some of his weekdays – for his own entertainment. If his uncle was at home on Saturday and Sunday, Wooseok had to be there as well. Otherwise, he’d be in for the worst.

Not that Wooseok would come to Seungyoun’s little event if his uncle wasn’t home.

Also, why chicken feet? Wooseok’s best guess was that it was Hyunjin’s request. He had read the gatekeeper’s bio. If it was really his request, Wooseok hoped he hadn’t asked for some beer as well.

The nerdy teen’s steps came to a halt outside a small, lovely vintage European style café, and pushed his round glasses up the bridge of his nose as he read the sign on the white brick wall, making sure it was the right place. Then, his gaze shifted to the window, and the sight he saw got his heart to jump a little. Suddenly he felt his stomach churn.

A bell’s cheerful chime greeted him as soon as he opened the door and stepped in. The young female barista behind the counter welcomed him with a bright smile, just as warm as the yellow lights and the whole atmosphere in the cozy space. There were not that many tables, not that many customers chilling there on that Friday night. Effortlessly, he found the person he was looking for.

Familiar cheeks and lips. Familiar long, smooth silky hair. Familiar twinkling innocent eyes. Familiar simple beauty. A girl in a powder blue dress, hair tucked behind the ear and slender leg crossed over the other, sitting alone in the corner, a book and a cup of hot vanilla latte on the table.

Wooseok’s feet were pinned to the floor. Images from the gone days flashed by before his eyes, like snippets of an old movie, quickly filling up his chest with emotions that were just as strong as what he had felt back in those days.

“Wooseokie…?”

The girl left her table and slowly came to Wooseok, awed and mesmerized, as if the sight of him was something so surreal. Wooseok gazed down at the petite girl before him and swallowed thick.

His first love was back.

“…Doyeonie.”

Two bodies then were pressed flush against each other in a firm hug,not minding the curious eyes around them.

“Thank you… Thank you for coming here to see me.” Doyeon pulled her head back to look at the taller teen’s face, smiling so adorably despite her glistening eyes. “I missed you.”

“I… I m-missed you too.” Wooseok blinked rapidly to fight back his tears. The smile on Doyeon’s plump lips went on full bloom.

“Gosh, you’ve grown so tall and handsome! Where did your emo hair go?” Doyeon laughed as she took the boy’s sweaty hand and led him to her table, secretly putting her thumb up as a code for the barista. That bubbly laugh alone was enough to bring back so many memories.

“I’m—I’m still shorter than other guys.” Wooseok slid his backpack off his shoulders and stiffly took a seat. Being a shy one, his ears were flushed red just from the compliment.

“It’s fine, you’re still growing!” Doyeon giggled. “Oh, since you don’t have much time… How are you?”

Wooseok fidgeted with his fingers. “I’m fine…”

“Elaborate your answer, please?” Doyeon didn’t buy it, and Wooseok understood. Her hand slid across the small round table and took his in a comforting grip. “You know, I’m still the same… You can tell me anything, Wooseokie.”

Wooseok couldn’t hide it any longer; the wave of emotions from those flashbacks that were starting to wreck his heart all over again. A drop of tear fell down his cheek.

“…It’s been hard.” More fresh tears followed as he squeezed the small hand in his, as if it could help him endure the pain – just like what he had always done whenever he had poured his heart out to her years ago. “T-There are nine of us.”

And so he proceeded to tell how things had led to that point, in such a jumbled chronological order, stuttered words that came out between sniffles. The strong sense of empathy that washed over the girl was quick to bring her to tears, crying along with him. One hand not letting go of Wooseok’s, she cupped his cheek in her free one as he spoke, gently erasing the wet trail left every time another tear slipped. Naturally and unwittingly, he leaned into her touch. It almost felt like a true home.

“I’m s-scared, I’m scared he might hurt us… Doyeonie… what do I do?” Wooseok’s round eyes were filled with horror. It was not his uncle anymore that he was referring to.

Doyeon had no solutions to give. That was what she had always been afraid of; only being able to listen, unable to help. Sinking her teeth onto her quivering bottom lip, she shook her head.

“I don’t… I don’t know what will work.” She took a sharp intake of breath to pull herself together. “But, Wooseokie… Hyunwoo is just like the others, isn’t he? He’s also a hurt alter. Maybe… Maybe you can keep trying to reach him? Keep talking to him? He seems lonely… Although he’s grown older now, he’s still a kid. Just fifteen years old, younger than us. Don’t you think… there could be a way to _fix_ him?”

As Wooseok hung his head low and said nothing in response, Doyeon could only feel disappointed with her own answer.

“We have a better inner world now.” Wooseok changed the topic, knowing that his problem would remain unsolved anyway. “It’s… a car workshop. Not a blank white space anymore.”

“Really?” The gloomy cloud casted on Doyeon’s face faded a little. “Is it nice in there?”

There was a small bitter smile quirking on Wooseok’s lips. “I still can’t see it myself. Wooshin told me about it. When I go back from fronting, I enter a void, while the others go back to this workshop. It’s an abandoned place, but Taejun keeps it clean and tidy. He also grows flowers and crops in the backyard, so he can feed others with fruits and vegetables. Wooshin has his own corner near the entrance and the windows, maybe that’s why he comes out more often than others. Doyeon likes to walk around and plays with the tools. She’s always bored and curious. Jaemi finds her noises annoying, so she stays away inside a car… an old red Beetle. When Doyeon gets too loud, Jaemi would honk the horn until they start fighting.”

“Wow, having two girls inside must be dramatic,” Doyeon commented. They chuckled.

“Maybe that’s why Hyunjin is always seen with headphones and stays far at the back,” Wooseok continued, “there was a separate room at the back, Shin and Woo stay there, and Hyunjin guards the door. Hyunjin is always busy with papers in a file cabinet near that door. He files our memories. Hyunwoo… Wooshin said he hadn’t seen Hyunwoo inside the workshop, but Taejun saw him roam outside, around a grove behind the workshop. Taejun is trying to approach him.”

“It will be a good start if Hyunwoo lets Taejun take care of him too,” Doyeon said, “I really hope things will get better for you soon, Wooseokie. At least in your system.”

Wooseok gave a helpless smile. “Thank you… Ah, we haven’t talked about you.”

“Nothing more important than things about you.” Doyeon grinned, showing off her cute eye smile. “I can always tell you in my emails. But your stuff is too complicated to tell in written words, so at times like this, it should be just about you.”

Wooseok rubbed his nape sheepishly, feeling uneasy. “I feel selfish.”

“You’re not… Ah, there it is.” Doyeon perked up seeing a waiter come with a dessert and a drink that she had ordered before Wooseok had come.

“Yay!” the petite girl clapped her hands adorably as the dish was served in the middle of their table, causing Wooseok to smile to himself, thinking how she was still as lovely as ever. “Now enjoy, Wooseokie!”

Wooseok’s faint smile faded completely. “They’re—They’re for me?” he stared wide-eyed at the food and the drink – a cup of iced Americano and a big block of fudgy brownie with two scoops of ice cream on it; one scoop of chocolate ice cream and one scoop of mint chocolate.

“Well, of course!” Doyeon answered like it was the most obvious thing in the world. “Ah, I asked for two scoops because I didn’t know which one of you would show up. I remember you liked mint chocolate, and Wooshinie liked chocolate, so it couldn’t go wrong if I ordered both! Unless… your favorite flavors have changed?”

“No…” _You still remember._ “No, they haven’t. I still like mint chocolate… Wooshin still likes chocolate.”

“That’s a relief! Go ahead and eat, then!”

“I… I can’t pay for this.”

Doyeon rolled her eyes. “It’s on me, Wooseokie. Hurry and eat, you need to go home soon!”

She grabbed the small fork next to the plate and cut off the corner of the brownie, put some of the mint ice cream on it, and brought it to the boy’s lips. “You have to try this, it’s _sooo_ good and the chocolate fudge is so rich, heavenly! I’ve come here with Dongpyo three times, we both had this!”

Ever so shyly, Wooseok opened up and took it in. Doyeon told no lies; it was heavenly. Only then did he realize that he was starving after having skipped meals.

“You like it?” Doyeon continued to feed the other a few more bites until he took over and started to feed himself, genuinely enjoying the dessert.

“It’s so good,” he said with a full mouth, smiling with his eyes. “Thank you, Doyeonie… Please eat it too.”

Being soft-hearted, Doyeon was moved just by the sight of the skinny boy eating well. The Kim Wooseok that she had known in middle high had almost been enemies with food.

“No, you can finish it all! I’m having dinner out with Dongpyo later.” Doyeon took a napkin and wiped off the trail of ice cream left above Wooseok’s lips. He flinched out of surprise, then smiled shyly to himself, keeping his head down as he devoured the remaining food and finished his coffee. Stealing a glance at Doyeon’s baby blue watch, he felt his heart drop a little bit. He was running out of time.

And his heart nearly dropped further down to his stomach the moment he looked outside inadvertently through the window. He ducked his head down and hid his face at that instant.

“We’re being watched… I need to go,” he said under his breath.

Doyeon had seen what he saw – two men in grey suits and sunglasses standing outside a shop across the street, one holding his phone to his ear, one just looking around with his hand in his pocket. They had been standing there for a while, and she had thought that maybe they had been waiting for their ride or such. Wooseok was a little late to notice their presence.

“Who are they?” Doyeon asked, not sparing a second glance at the men. “Your uncle’s pets?”

Wooseok nodded, terrified by the fact that he was seen hanging out with a girl.

“Gangsters in suits… Gosh, your uncle is just too much!” Doyeon rolled her eyes, exasperated.

After a pause, she leaned in, her voice barely audible as she asked, “Is he still involved in drug dealing?”

Looking down, Wooseok averted his gaze to the wall. “There are boxes of pills hidden at home.”

“Does he know that you know?”

“…He does. He figured out.”

Doyeon heaved a long sigh, suddenly feeling a troubling amount of pressure that made her head throb. “Is this… Is this why you stay away from your friends? From Jinhee? Because you have these guys following you around to make sure you keep quiet, not just about his abuse, but his dirty business too?”

The truth had been spoken. Wooseok felt like crying. He desperately needed to pour it out on someone, yet he knew he had to go if he didn’t want Doyeon to be in trouble too.

“I’m sorry. Thank you for the food.” Without another word, he stood up, put his backpack on, grabbed his bag of chicken feet, and made his way to the door, leaving Doyeon flabbergasted.

“Wait… Wait!” Snapping out of it, Doyeon ran after the boy and pushed him aside before he could reach the door. Taken aback, Wooseok stared at the small girl as she grabbed both his arms and shot him a fierce gaze. “Don’t you walk away like that, I’m leaving next week and who knows when we’ll see each other again!”

After making sure they were out of the spies’ sight behind the wall, Doyeon pulled Wooseok into a warm, gentle hug, pressing her ear on his chest so that his heartbeats could assure her that this short moment was real, so she could let it sink in that they had reunited again after having been separated thousands of miles away, and that it was not at all impossible for them to see each other again like this someday… as long as those heartbeats hadn’t stopped.

“Now I understand that you just want to keep them safe… it’s so you, putting others before yourself. But if you keep going on like this… you’ll be stuck in that maze forever, because you yourself block your ways out. Try to have trust on them, Wooseokie, they’ll find ways to protect you and themselves. Jinhee, you have not only her, but also her family. A doctor who can help you. Let them come in and take you out… I can always tell them everything if you want me to help that way, but it’s not my place to take the first step. It’s a decision you have to make on your own. Tell me whenever you need help… When I come back someday, I hope I’ll see that you’ve been set free. Otherwise, I’ll be there with the others to fight for you.”

Doyeon pulled Wooseok down by his tie, stood on her toes, and left a soft kiss on his cheek that made him freeze. Before pulling back, she whispered, “I’ll have my driver watch over you on your way home. Your uncle’s men won’t notice him.”

“…W-What about you?” Wooseok stammered, face flushed from the kiss.

Doyeon took a step back and grinned, perfectly masking her sadness. “Don’t worry about me. Dongpyo is nearby with his friends. They’ll come here, I’ll be fine with them! Now go, be safe on your way, okay?”

Wooseok really did not want to go. “P-Please say hi to Dongpyo for me… I’ll… I’ll miss you.”

Doyeon laughed and gave a playful punch on the taller teen’s arm. “Ahh, me too! That’s why don’t ignore my emails!”

A sudden realization hit Wooseok. “Ah, about that… Instead of emails, you can have my phone number.”

“Phone number…? Wait. You have a phone?? But Jinhee said—”

“It’s new, please don’t tell anyone. I’ll explain later.”

That evening, Wooseok went home thinking if he had done a terrible mistake by meeting up with Doyeon and even giving his number to her, if another series of unfortunate events would soon follow these reckless actions, if he really had to listen to Doyeon’s advice and start to seek for help…

…If that kiss on the cheek was okay, if she had any motives behind it, or if she still had genuine feelings…

…if a particular girl would get at least somewhat jealous if she found out about that little kiss.

Above it all, he was just dying to know the reason for the feeling of guilt that he couldn’t shake off… even until he fell sleep with new bruises that night.

* * *

**AUTHOR'S NOTE**

First of all, sorry for the misleading image above (Dongpyo and Wooseok) if anyone expected to see an interaction between those two cuties lol since Doyeon took a big part of this chapter, I decided to use the pic of the male version of her :)) let's take a moment to appreciate Son Dongpyo's visual...

So cute.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The next chapter is going to be one hell of an EMOTIONAL ride :) There will be a bunch of JinSeok's moments! Happy, sad, heated, thrilling and adrenaline pumping, you name it. I was going to put some in this chapter but it went too long, so please look forward to the next update! Thank you so much for still reading this story and leaving kudos and bearing with my slow ass, really appreciate it!


	21. Chapter 21

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> !!TRIGGER WARNING!!: ABUSE, CURSE WORDS, SUICIDE ATTEMPT, BLOOD.
> 
> This chapter is super long, you might want to have enough spare time and get comfortable if you wanna read the whole thing at once. Here is the promised emotional ride, enjoy!

* * *

“You bought a phone??”

“Yes!! Look!”

Kim Doyeon waved a brand new white smartphone before Jinhee’s shocked face – it was not at all the latest, most expensive type of its brand, but certainly functional and did not look like an ancient device either.

“But… how? Where did you get the money from?” Jinhee asked, checking the phone out in awe as she took a sip of her water. She nearly spat out her drink as soon as she pressed the lock button and a photo of Yohan showed up as the lock screen. It was one of the selfies posted on his Instagram.

“Hyunjin’s money! Well, technically it was not his money because he stole it from Wooseok’s uncle, and also technically I didn’t pay for the phone with my own money since I didn’t and do not have any, but still, I was the one who went out there courageously and bought this handsome guy!” Doyeon claimed with a triumphant smile. “Now, save my number. Later we can have late night gossips!”

“O-Okay… Late night gossips.” Just like that, effortlessly, Jinhee got Wooseok’s new number. Saving the contact under the name _Wooseokie,_ she held herself back from jumping and crying out in joy there in a crowded place. “So… Who is this Hyunjin you mentioned?”

“You don’t know yet?” the female alter visibly froze up, thinking she might have just spilled a critical information that should have been kept under wraps.

_Ah, well, too late._ Shrugging it off, she giggled coyly. “Our cute gatekeeper! Ah… he’s really, _really_ attractive! So handsome, so charming, so captivating… What do I do?? I think I like him! Aish, too bad I can’t take a picture of him to replace my wallpaper and lock screen.”

Jinhee thought she needed extra buffer time to process everything she had just heard, if she had heard correctly. Blinking at the pouty pinkish lips of the boy sitting before her, in the middle of the school’s bustling cafeteria, under some of their friends’ watch, Jinhee reminded herself that it was not Wooseok himself who was confessing to potentially having a crush on a guy – another guy in his own head. _And_ having a photo of a guy friend as a lock screen.

Jinhee had _way_ too many questions to ask. “Okay… Can we start from the very beginning? Like, how he came into being, or what kind of person he is, or maybe his basic information… if you know enough?”

Somewhat upset that she didn’t get an immediate solution to her new crush problem, Doyeon let out a loud, sassy sigh. “Well… Yeah, I think I know enough! At least from what he’s written in our diary. The thing is, you see, there wouldn’t be a problem if we were close. But the truth is, we’re not! We see each other, yet we _don’t_ talk to each other. _Tsk…_ How am I going to get to know him more? Ah, but at least we have Yoo Taejun, he’s really a peacemaker. He can talk to most of us, so he can be a good messenger too, you know? I’ll just tell you what I know from him and our diary. So... Bae Hyunjin, huh. First, he’s Bae Jaemi’s younger brother. How could they be siblings, though? Poor guy has an old prostitute as his sister. Wait, don’t judge me for calling her that, she dresses like one!”

Hearing Hyunjin’s surname, a scene flashed in Jinhee’s mind; when the mysterious, charming alter pretending to be Wooseok had accidentally written _Bae_ instead of _Kim_ on his English quiz.

_That must’ve been him! Bae Hyunjin…_

“He’s twenty two years old, three years younger than Jaemi, a university student, studies computer science. He split off of Wooseok. He’s _reeeeally_ ambitious and his goals are so unrealistic, like, being the richest person in Korea, and building a futuristic castle in Seoul? Where will he build that castle, in the middle of Han river? Seoul is out of space, he can have his castle in my heart instead.” Doyeon giggled and let out a tiny squeal. “You know, that grandma Jaemi and I don’t get along. Why would she call herself _Jaemi, ‘fun’,_ if she doesn’t know how to have fun? She always honks at me whenever I do something fun. Literally honking! She stays inside an old dusty red Beetle all the time. Every time we bicker, Hyunjin would glance at us from his corner and smirk. Gosh! I know that smirk probably means, ‘Ha, keep fighting, I’ve got these headphones to shield my ears,’ or something like that, but it’s just a super attractive smirk… Ahh, no, I sound so whipped!”

While the teenage girl alter kept gushing on and on about their system’s new gatekeeper, Jinhee found herself wondering about something else instead; from how Doyeon described the small events happening in their inner world, it really seemed like they had a very real, complete alternate universe inside, not just a blank white space that they used to have.

Feeling uneasy to cut Doyeon’s endless compliments for Hyunjin, Jinhee changed the topic to the inner world. Doyeon described everything about their abandoned car workshop in details, like how Wooseok had described it to Son Doyeon – except that after a few days since Wooseok had met his dear old friend, a little change had occurred to that inner space, and the mention of it got Jinhee to clutch onto the edges of their table.

“Moon Hyunwoo… That kid is so scary. His face is pale and there are dark circles around his dead eyes. Like a panda, but skinny and not cute, although he has a baby face… He carries a dirty axe on his shoulder all the time, like, what is he gonna do with that thing?? He’s always outside, there was a grove behind the workshop but now it’s grown into a whole forest surrounding us. He’s always somehere deep in that forest. But… you see, he came inside once, and it was _sooo_ creepy. He just stood at the door holding his axe and stared blankly at us. Then, he went back outside. Like, excuse me, what?? Was he choosing his first victim?? Taejun oppa said we couldn’t get killed in our space, we can’t die, which kinda doesn’t make any sense to me, like how the fact that I live inside a guy’s body also doesn’t make sense, and you know it’s always shocking when I look down and find a sausage hanging, it also kinda shifts and hangs to the wrong side inside the pants sometimes, so annoying, but you get my point… Gosh, I wish he’d just disappear! Moon Hyunwoo, not the little sausage buddy. Everything inside feels just as real as this outside world… It’s scary!”

_They can’t die inside, but of course they can die if Hyunwoo comes out to the real world!_

Gazing at the anxious handsome face – Wooseok’s face – that was dear to her heart, Jinhee bit her quivering lip and forced out a smile. At a moment like this, she was supposed to give at least a little strength or comfort to him and his alters, not scare them with the worst possibilities that were already filling up her mind.

“Don’t be scared,” Jinhee said, “you can… you can call me whenever you need help, or when you feel like something wrong is going to happen. I promise I’ll drop everything I’m doing and go straight to where you are. Ah, should I give you a call now? So you can save my number too.”

“Oh, no need, we have your number in our contact list already! Although all contacts are saved under emojis instead of proper names… But I figured that the fox in the list is you, after finding your number in the diary! It’s hidden somewhere in Wooshin’s section.” Doyeon shot a teasing smile, which then turned into a thankful one. “I’ll be sure to contact you before anyone else if there’s something wrong. Thank you so much… unnie.”

Jinhee choked on air upon hearing the boy call her _unnie_ so naturally, like a real girl would. At the same time, two boys from their class, Hangyul’s friends, happened to pass by and hear the word too. They stopped abruptly and looked at Doyeon – or Wooseok on the outside – with eyes as wide as saucers.

“Bro, did you just call her _unnie_??” One of them asked.

Doyeon panicked, realizing that she was supposed to act and talk like a boy around strangers.

“Ah, um,” she deepened her voice, “n-nah, you misheard it! I called her h-honey... Yes, honey!” She dragged her chair to Jinhee’s side and wrapped an arm around her shoulders, giving the boys a smug, rather nervous look. “Move along, _bro.”_

The boys’ jaws dropped. “Woah... Really, Kim Wooseok... You’re really full of surprises,” said one of them.

“Are you guys dating?” Asked the other one.

“Uh, yes—“

“No,” Jinhee cut Doyeon’s answer.

“No,” Doyeon fixed her answer and flashed an innocent smile, then whispered to the classmates, “Still working on it.”

“Uh... Okay, good luck.” After giving thumbs up, the confused boys walked away and left the cafeteria.

Jinhee chuckled and rolled her eyes, secretly letting out a nervous sigh after the unexpected embrace. “Still working on it?”

“Well... At least one of the _guys_ must be working on it?” Doyeon giggled as she returned her seat back to its previous position.

Gazing into the distance, Jinhee sighed, a distant smile playing on her lips.

“I’d like to believe that, Doyeonie... but the reality doesn’t look like that.”

* * *

It was raining. Standing at the entrance of a bookstore, Jinhee stared up at the gloomy white sky. She had seen this coming. It had been rather sunny when she had entered the store an hour before, but then there she was, mentally giving herself an endless lecture about trusting her own bad feeling and always taking an umbrella with her when the weather was as unstable as her mood swings on period.

The raging sound of the pouring rain hitting roofs and concretes only grew louder as the teenage girl exhaled a helpless sigh.

“Dummy…” She knocked her own forehead. “Sure, it only takes five minutes to go home, but of course I’ll still get soaking wet.”

Jinhee looked at the canvas and art supplies that she had just purchased, then back at the sky, and flew her gaze around until it stopped on a convenience store across the street.

Someone was standing there, holding a yellow umbrella, blank eyes staring at her. Upon the eye contact, Jinhee’s breath got caught in her throat.

Once the pedestrian crossing light switched from red to green, the lanky figure with the umbrella ran across the street, straight towards her. He took Jinhee’s hand, wrapped it around the handle of his umbrella, and without a word, ran back to where he had come from, unshielded from the rain.

Jinhee was too taken by surprise that she failed to take an immediate action. However, when she snapped back to her senses, she became careless and launched herself across the street without even noticing that the crossing light was turning red.

“…W-Wooseok! Wooshin! Wait!”

As a long, loud sound of a horn was approaching at a dangerously high speed, the boy turned around and reached his hand out to her. Four wheels screeched against the wet, slippery concrete, two bodies crashed down together, and art supplies were thrown and scattered onto the sidewalk. For a brief moment, it was as if everyone and everything around them had stopped in time…

…until the window of the car went down and the furious driver – a man in his late twenties – screamed at the two of them.

“Hey!! Are you blind or dumb?! Find another way if you wanna die, don’t get others in trouble!! For fuck’s sake… I don’t have time for this!!”

The car zoomed away, leaving the two teenagers on the sidewalk, soaking wet in the rain. Drops of water were dripping down their hair, trickling down their faces, perfectly masking their tears that they were late to realize they were both crying.

“…I’m sorry,” the boy croaked as he began to gather the paint bottles on the ground. “I’ve… I’ve made a mistake.”

Hands trembling, Jinhee took the yellow umbrella that had been thrown away, and held it over their heads as they cleaned up the mess together.

“W-What do you mean?” she asked, wiping her tears away with the back of her hand before shoving her stuff back into her shopping bag.

“I shouldn’t have helped you.”

They stood up and gazed at each other, tears pooling in their eyes.

And the boy asked, “Who are you?”

Jinhee felt a pang in her heart.

“How did you know those names? Wooseok… Wooshin? Those names... They’re _not_ me.”

It was neither of them who had given her the umbrella. Neither Wooseok nor his alter Wooshin.

“I think… I think I know your face now. From the book. Are you… Cha Jinhee?”

Of course, they would’ve walked away.

“Yes, I am Cha Jinhee. Are you going to avoid me too?”

The boy didn’t answer. He sniffled and harshly wiped the water off his face.

Out of the blue, he shouted, “I’m not a bad person! I just wanted to help, but I helped the wrong person, and I put you in danger, and now you’re crying! Everything I do is wrong… but I am not a bad person! No matter what they say, remember that, Moon Hyunwoo is not a bad person!!”

Jinhee’s eyes rounded in horror as if she had just encountered the grim reaper in person. At last, she was standing face to face with the feared suicidal alter.

“Moon Hyunwoo…”

“Walk away before I bring you more bad luck.”

The fifteen-year-old boy inside Wooseok’s body shot Jinhee a hurt look before turning around and running away as fast as he could.

“Wait… Hyunwoo, wait!” Jinhee started to chase the boy, slipping between people who were heading the opposite way, not minding the eyes watching their scene along the way.

“Stop following me!!” Hyunwoo yelled. “Stay away!! A person like me should just disappear!!”

“Please, let me talk to you! I know—I know you’re a good person, you’ve saved me! Give me a chance to know you and I promise I’ll be your best friend! A friend who will never leave you... Please, don’t run away from me!! Please! Please…”

Jinhee sobbed, and forced her legs to move faster. Her sight was getting blurrier with her own tears and the rain that got into her eyes. She was running like a thief had just stolen her most precious belonging; Hyunwoo was taking Wooseok’s body away, along with everyone else in it, thinking that the others inside would not get hurt as well if he tried to _disappear,_ and there was no way Jinhee would let that happen. Pushing herself as hard as she could, she extended her arm forward and reached for the boy’s back.

_Don’t run away… Don’t hurt them… You can’t hurt them,_ _they’re MY love!_

Red crossing light ahead... Wet street, speeding cars... Hyunwoo wasn’t slowing down.

“Moon Hyunwoo!!!”

Jinhee dropped everything she was holding, yanked the back of the boy’s shirt, and pulled him back with all her might...

_right_ before he could jump into his instant death.

She goggled in horror as a car zoomed past her sight, its wheels splashing a good amount of water at them. If only she had been one second too slow, she would’ve watched Wooseok leave her for good, with her own eyes, at that very moment.

“NO!! Let go of me!!” The furious alter thrashed and threw punches into the empty air... until his hand swung and landed on the side of Jinhee’s face in a hard slap.

Jinhee let go of the other’s shirt and held her face in the utmost shock. A middle-aged woman, who had witnessed the scene, approached them with her huge umbrella and started to beat the boy with her purse out of nowhere.

“Hey! What kind of a man are you, you little punk?? Beating a lady in public?? You have got no shame! Such a disgrace of a family!”

It was stinging hot, where he had hit her. There was a constant ringing in her left ear. She could barely feel her face… but the dull ache was nothing compared to the pain in her heart once she saw the lost, helpless, glimmering beautiful doe eyes that were then directed at her, quietly begging for her help.

Still crying, Jinhee slipped between the two and shielded the boy with her body.

“Excuse me... Excuse me, ma’am… Please stop, it was an accident.” Jinhee caught the woman’s hands and brought them down in the most respectful way possible. “He didn’t... mean to hurt me.”

“Why are you defending him? You must show him that females aren’t weak! If you continue to be soft like this on him, he will step all over you in your relationship and make your life a living hell!” the woman glared past Jinhee’s shoulder.

“It’s… It’s really not like that.” Jinhee forced herself to smile. “We are not in a relationship. Just friends… He’s been a little stressed out lately, maybe I was too pushy on him. It’s my fault. Ah, but still, thank you for defending me… I hope you’re living a happy life.”

Looking somewhat bitter, the woman averted her gaze away. “ _Tch_ , very happy indeed.” She shot another threatening glare. “It’s not right to let men beat women, no matter what kind of relationship you have!”

“I agree…” Jinhee bowed a little, her faint smile remaining on her lips. “…but, with all due respect, I also believe that it’s not right to beat boys as well. They… They can be fragile too.”

Jinhee and the woman could not see eye to eye about this view, apparently. And so, while grumbling about _teenagers these days_ , the woman stomped away as soon as the crossing light turned green. Just after she had gone out of sight, Jinhee turned around to see an unreadable expression on the boy’s face.

“Are you okay?” she asked, her voice shaky.

“…I don’t know what happened… but I’m sorry.”

Letting out a bitter chuckle, Jinhee offered the yellow umbrella back to the other.

“Nothing happened… Don’t worry.”

“Hm? That’s clearly a lie. You said I didn’t mean to hurt you, we’re wet, and half of your face is red. This is kind of a dramatic scene.”

At this point, Jinhee was too tired to even try to guess who it was that was talking to her. However, from his soothing deep voice, and his lopsided, little unsympathetic smile, she might say it was Bae Hyunjin the gatekeeper.

“Take your umbrella back and go home, Kim Wooseok.”

The boy looked around and scratched the back of his ear. “Uh… Why don’t we walk home together? Since… we’re neighbors?”

_Definitely not Wooshin nor Wooseok._ Jinhee nodded to herself. “You don’t know your way back, do you? Okay, let’s go.”

The alter held the umbrella for both of them, and they walked back home together like nothing had happened, as if everything had been perfectly fine. Most of the time was spent in silence.

“…You’re playing along.” The alter started.

“Hm?” Jinhee looked up to meet the taller’s gaze. His expression remained indifferent.

“You know there’s something different, but you don’t point it out.”

“Oh… I thought it might make you uncomfortable.”

The alter sank in deep thoughts before suddenly blurting out, “Since I have my own ideas of what’s best… I’m Bae Hyunjin.”

Despite all the chaos that had taken place just minutes before, a genuine happy smile found its way to Jinhee’s lips, carving dimples on her cheeks.

“Thank you for trusting me enough to know your identity.” Jinhee breathed out a contented sigh. “So… what’s best?”

“You don’t have to know the details.” Hyunjin looked away, feeling a sense of achievement himself. “I’ve done enough research on you to make sure if you can be trusted. I have my own mind, I don’t have to agree with others and follow their way. Especially when they’re lost and confused themselves.”

Jinhee saw a glint of hope.

“Does that mean… You’re not going to push me away?” she asked, full of anticipation.

“Only if you can be helpful.” Hyunjin glanced down and stifled a chuckle seeing the other’s sparkly puppy eyes.

‘I-I’ll be super helpful! I swear! W-What can I do to help??” Jinhee balled up her fists in excitement.

Hyunjin said nonchalantly, “I need to find a mansion far away from here so I can leave that hellhole. It’d be a moronic move to leave when I don’t have a secure place to stay.”

“Ah, um… about that… since mansions are… _very_ expensive, why don’t you stay… at my place instead?” Jinhee suggested carefully. She remembered what Doyeon had said about Hyunjin’s unrealistic goals. Well, at least he wasn’t asking her to build a castle for him.

“That would be a moronic move too. I said _far_ away,” Hyunjin said sharply. Jinhee winced. “Somewhere that can’t be tracked. Only then it’ll be safe to execute any plans. Blow up the man’s place or whatever, from _far_ away.”

_Ah… He has his own plans for Wooseok’s uncle_ _,_ Jinhee figured out. Unlike Wooseok and his other alters, apparently, Hyunjin had thought much further on getting back at their abuser. But still, Jinhee didn’t think it was a realistic – or even a good idea to bomb the house.

“We can gather evidences and get the police to arrest him instead…? We can do it when he lets his guard down,” she suggested again, kind of afraid to say something stupid.

“It’s not that simple, you baby.” The _baby_ came out as a subtle insult, not a term of endearment. Jinhee pouted. “If it was that simple, we wouldn’t try to seek for help.” Hyunjin sighed. “Nevermind, you don’t need to know the details… Maybe this is why they don’t get you involved.”

“You don’t even let me know the situation,” Jinhee defended herself, “how can I help when I don’t even know what makes it _‘not that simple’_?”

“It’s because when you find out what makes it _‘not that simple’_ , soon or later you’ll be in danger too. Not that I care, but the others care.” Hyunjin stopped walking and faced the other. “Find me a safe place and I’ll take you with me. Do that or nothing.” He looked around. “I know my way from here. Take this with you.”

After forcing the umbrella into Jinhee’s grip, Hyunjin turned and ran away into the rain, leaving the troubled girl alone with a bunch of unanswered questions and a new mission that she had no clue how to complete.

* * *

Autumn was Jinhee’s favorite season. When the breeze felt a little cooler on her skin, people started to wear an extra layer of clothing, and the green leaves began to turn yellow, she knew it was her month; the gorgeous October.

“Waaah our October babies are here!”

Seungyoun galloped around the classroom as soon as Jinhee walked in, followed by Wooseok, who had arrived at the same time. Jinhee laughed, while Wooseok didn’t seem to be aware that he was one of the _October babies_ mentioned, until Seungyoun escorted both of them to their seats like a bodyguard.

Uncharacteristically, Yeonwoo had come much earlier than those two that day. The first day of October was always the day of the year when she suddenly became a very ambitious _event organizer_ – she had started planning a little something with Seungyoun and Hangyul for Jinhee’s eighteenth birthday. There were only nine days left until the awaited special day.

“Ahh, Jinny, I don’t know what to get for your present anymore!” Yeonwoo whined as she pulled her longtime friend into her lap, squeezing her in a back hug. “I feel like I’ve used all ideas in the previous years. Tell me what you don’t have! Other than a boyfriend, obviously, because I can’t give you that in nine days. Unless…” She pointed her chin towards Wooseok and flashed a cheeky grin. “…someone wants to volunteer.”

As always, Wooseok pretended to be deaf.

“Hey, Kim Wooseok!” Yeonwoo attempted to get his attention, kicking the back leg of his chair.

Jinhee pulled Yeonwoo’s foot back with her own and whispered, “Stop it! It’s still early, give him a break.”

Yeonwoo continued to tease anyway, while Seungyoun sat in Jinhee’s seat and watched with a broad, entertained grin. Hangyul joined them and allowed himself to sit on Wooseok’s desk.

“Hey, Wooseokie, it’s Jinny’s birthday soon! Have you prepared a present for her? You should at least give her a flower or a cute letter.” Yeonwoo giggled. “Oh! If we throw a party, won’t you come? You’ve _got_ to come! You’ll make her sad and disappointed if you don’t show up!”

Wooseok fidgeted with his fingers, looking uncomfortable and guilt-ridden.

“He’s about to cry,” Hangyul said, pointing at Wooseok’s face. The nerdy boy shook his head fervently and dropped his chin to his chest, hiding his face.

“Aww… Don’t be sad, Wooseokie.” Seungyoun rubbed the smaller boy’s back. “We know you’d come if you could, right?”

“Oh, come on. What party are you guys talking about anyway? There will be no parties.” Clicking her tongue, Jinhee moved Seungyoun away from her seat and claimed it back. Wooseok stole a quick glance at her, and twitched a little when their eyes met unintentionally. Jinhee felt a tug in her chest just from seeing how nervous and anxious he was.

_Gosh, why is he like this? I want to hug him…_

“Aish, you’re no fun. We’re still going to throw a party for you anyway!” Yeonwoo declared, and Jinhee knew well there was no stopping her.

Keeping his head down, Wooseok stared at the faint red paint left around his nails, and hid those stained fingers under his other hand.

_I want to come… I’ve… prepared a present too. I’m working on it…_

He had been spending the last three days painting in his room. Instead of using brushes, he used his own fingers, swiping and sliding them on the canvas endlessly, putting layer over layer of paint, changing and fixing every little details so much because he wanted it to be perfect.

And that night, too, he sat before his canvas despite coming home very late from school. There was no telling when another alter would come fronting next, and how long he would be out, hence why his every minute was extremely valuable.

Wooseok would not worry too much if it was Wooshin who took over; not only the art would be safe in his hands, but also there would be a good progress, although their styles of art weren’t exactly similar. If it was any other alter who fronted, it would be a whole different story.

His worries came true the next morning; he woke up as Taejun, then later switched to Doyeon, and stayed as Hyunjin the following day. None of them could paint.

Hyunjin had nothing to say to Jinhee whenever he was in charge, if it wasn’t about the mansion he had asked for.

“Have you found a good place?”

“Not yet… If you don’t want to be tracked, we can hide on a mountain far away where nobody else lives, but no mansions there and we can’t go to school.”

“Keep searching.”

The next morning, Wooshin finally came out. Yet unfortunately, for an unknown trigger, Jaemi showed up and replaced him just half an hour before the end of the school hours.

“Why is she out??” Yeonwoo could barely watch when Jaemi – who of course still appeared as Wooseok on the outside – sat in Hangyul’s lap, clinging on him so seductively while their classmates cringed their way out of the classroom. Apparently she remembered him from the night she had first revealed herself on the summer trip.

“I-I don’t know.” Jinhee shuddered at the sight.

“Must be because of an erotic thought,” Seungyoun said. “She’s a sexual alter, so she’s triggered by sexual stuff… right?”

“You mean Wooshin was thinking dirty earlier?” Yeonwoo blurted. Jinhee’s ears turned red.

“Ah, I can’t say he was, but it’s possible! Don’t trust me, though!” Seungyoun turned red in the face as well, for an unknown reason.

The truth was, it wasn’t exactly because of a dirty thought that she was out. That morning, Wooseok’s uncle had demanded him to go straight back home after school so they could have some _fun_ , as what he liked to call it, since the following day was Saturday and the boy didn’t have to get up early for school. Wooshin just couldn’t deal with the thought of what was waiting for him at home… So, it was Jaemi’s time to be in action.

As Jaemi was leaving, after Hangyul’s lack of response other than his dead fish face, Jinhee stopped her in her track down an empty corridor.

“What is it, darling?” Jaemi’s voice was soft and breathy, her gaze alluring, almost drunken even. Jinhee found herself staring at the moist parted lips, the pink tongue that then peeked through, gliding across in a slow, teasing manner, noticing the attention it had gotten.

“You’re staring at these lips. Do you want a kiss?” Suddenly, the distance between them was gone as Jaemi held Jinhee’s chin and brought their faces close, to the point that the tips of their noses brushed against each other. Jinhee squeezed her eyes shut and let out a tiny squeak.

“N-No, don’t… Don’t do this.” _You’re not Wooseok._ _.. not even Wooshin._

Chuckling, Jaemi let go of the other’s face and took a step back. Jinhee’s gaze became blurry as she opened her eyes. Oh, how she wished she could have that kiss… with _him,_ not any other person inside him.

“If you have nothing else to say, I have somewhere to be. See you around.”

She couldn’t stand it too. Just like Wooshin, Jinhee couldn’t bring herself to think of what could possibly happen that night behind closed doors.

“W-Where do you need to be?”

Jaemi didn’t stop walking away.

“I only have two places to be… In my Beetle, and in bed.”

“You… You don’t have to do this!”

“Nonsense. It’s what I live for, darling.”

While Jinhee cried herself to sleep that night, Jaemi remained awake until the sun crawled up from its slumber, serving her sole purpose to please the abuser. The man had fallen asleep by her side. He was not exactly an ugly old pig, as what Jinhee had imagined, but instead a handsome thirty-seven-year-old man, with a small face, a pair of piercing eyes, a sharp nose, and high cheekbones. The beauty ran in the genes.

It was the very first time he let himself fall asleep in his nephew’s room. He was aware of Jaemi’s existence, and thus Wooseok’s disorder too. Not that he would bother looking up what the disorder was even called – he just knew that the boy had multiple personalities, like in those movies, and some of them were more than capable of knocking him out. Needless to say, the very little knowledge he had about it was inaccurate. He had seen Wooseok as a little beast who needed to be tamed, and therefore, he had to make it clear who was in charge in that house through even worse physical abuse. The false knowledge had led to this faulty logic.

Nonetheless, ever since Jaemi had come into being, the way he saw this disorder had changed... just a _tiny_ bit. Because she was so compliant to him, so ready to take what was coming her way, never uttering a single word of protest. It did look like she actually _enjoyed_ what he did to her, even reciprocating his actions with a hint of affection, which had made him stop and think for a moment the first time he had realized this change.

He thought he had found gold.

And that was how Jaemi became the only alter who had witnessed the abuser’s vulnerable side. No one would have guessed that he even had this side, but at that moment, it was completely exposed for Jaemi to watch.

Just like his nephew, the man also talked in his sleep.

“I… miss you… I’m sorry… I’m… a failure.”

Careful and hesitant, Jaemi brought a hand to the sleeping face, fingertips brushing against the cheek before she caressed it tenderly. Instinctively, he leaned into the touch.

“You’re lonely, aren’t you?” a bitter smile graced the teenage boy’s lips. “Why… Why do you have to let it out on an innocent child? How miserable… _We_ are miserable. You, and _us…_ Pathetic.”

With a sigh, she drifted off to a dreamless slumber.

The next time those doe eyes opened again, they were filled with horror, realizing that he was entirely uncovered. The spot next to him was then empty, yet the crumpled sheets became the evidence that someone had been there indeed.

“No… Not again…”

It was Hyunwoo. The young boy was petrified. Curling under the blanket, he clutched and tugged on his messy locks, his shoulders shaking as quiet sobs kept slipping out, gradually getting louder and heavier.

“I’m dirty… I’m dirty…”

He was too scared to move, even though the house was dead silent. It wasn’t until two hours later that he finally had the courage to uncover his head and peek at the new digital clock on the bedside table – it showed not just the time, but also the day, month, date, year. It was there thanks to Jaemi, who had requested for it to Wooseok’s uncle a week before. Shockingly, he had bought it just a day after.

_Saturday. October 5, 2013. 3:10 PM._

There were clothes that had been thrown onto the floor. Wooseok’s clothes. Acting as if there was someone else in the room who could see him, Hyunwoo scrambled off to pick them up, rushed back to the bed, and quickly got dressed under the cover.

His stomach was rumbling. He was starving, and his body was sticky with sweat, he desperately wanted to scrub off every traces and fingerprints left by the amoral man. Even though it was literally not his own body, he lived in it, and he felt as though it was his own anyway – he felt _used._

Of all alters, Moon Hyunwoo held the worst trauma, the most horrific memories of Wooseok’s early teenage years, when his uncle had also been younger and crazier than ever with his _experiments._ Those memories used to be Wooshin’s, as he had been the only one to shield Wooseok and take the abuse, yet when things had become too unbearable for him, Hyunwoo had split off of him to hold those traumatic memories. Then, nobody else knew the worst things that had happened in those dark years. Not even Wooshin himself.

Flashbacks hit Hyunwoo’s senses in waves; from snippets of the past abuse, to voices of a man’s angry scream and a boy’s loud, piercing cries, to a burning pain, a _real_ physical pain that spread on his back and shot down to his lower body. Suddenly he was not in his bed anymore, but in a dim room, his wrists and legs bound, facing the abuser who had a whip in his hand. He had hit a point of no return; all his senses were then completely taken over by the trauma, trapping him in the gone moment, and all he could feel was extreme fear and pain, as if he had just been put back in that scene right there and then.

He writhed in anguish, and his scream broke in the silent, empty house. He screamed, and screeched, and cried out loud, but nobody heard him.

“Aaahhh!! Please stop!! It hurts, it hurts so much!! I’m sorry… I’m so sorry, please stop it!!”

The full flashback didn’t leave him until half an hour later, when he was drenched in sweat and out of breath. He lay weakly, tangled in his messy blanket, like every bone in his body had been crushed. Constant streams of tears remained on his flushed cheeks as he slowly faded away…

…until it was black.

The boy was jolted back to consciousness hours later by a loud banging on the door. The clock still displayed the same date, yet a lot of time had passed – it was almost ten at night. He had spent the whole day in bed.

Hyunwoo wobbled his way to the door, his sight filled with stars due to the sudden motions of getting up and jumping off the bed. He wasn’t going to open the door. He wanted to hold it closed instead.

But he was a little too slow, and way too weak; right when he got his hands on the door, it was thrown open with such a force that easily sent him down to the floor, causing his back to hit the edge of the body-length mirror’s frame on the wall.

Hyunwoo became a trembling ball on the floor as the man of his nightmares stood before him, towering over him, glaring down at him with his intoxicated, crazy eyes. Hyunwoo knew, more than anyone else, that this monster was a whole different kind of breed under alcohol’s influence.

“Sleeping all day, huh…? Messy house, no food, you think you can live like a prince here?! LAZY ASS LITTLE BITCH!”

Hyunwoo’s survival instinct kicked in, pushing him to get up and run away as soon as the man’s hand came flying towards him. The older male growled in fury finding that he had hit empty air. Soon enough, they were playing an intense cat and mouse game, with lots of yelling and begging, and random items being thrown across the room.

“HOW DARE YOU RUN AWAY FROM ME!!” The uncle grabbed a book on the desk and threw it at the boy running and jumping over the bed like a frightened deer. “DO YOU WANT TO DIE?!”

“I’m sorry!! Please stop chasing me, please, I will clean the house and make dinner! Please don’t hurt me, I’m so sorry!” Hyunwoo cried.

“YOU’RE GOING TO SUFFER TONIGHT!!!’

Hyunwoo’s head was throbbing. Everything was spinning in his sight. The next things that happened went almost in slow motion to him; like a mad gorilla, the man grabbed a chair, lifted it above his head, and tossed it towards him with all his strength. The boy’s teary eyes grew wide as he ducked down and shielded himself with his thin arms, and he heard the sound of a glass being shattered; the chair hit the mirror behind him. Pieces of glass fell down and crashed onto the floor… but grazed against flesh, leaving a long line on the teen’s right forearm, tearing his skin open. Crimson red seeped out and flowed down the pale skin.

The monster had no mercy even upon seeing blood. He yanked the sobbing boy up by the collar, and a loud slapping sound was heard as the back of his hand made contact with the small face.

At this point, Hyunwoo was completely assured that he was going to die a humiliating death that night…

…if it weren’t for the phone call that saved him right in time.

A phone call from a business partner – a _dirty_ business partner that couldn’t be ignored. The drunk man’s breath was loud and heavy upon reading the caller’s ID, clearly trying his best not to smash his phone. He tossed his nephew away and kicked him before leaving the room, and then leaving the house… just like that, without another single word.

Hyunwoo was pale in the face seeing the amount of red running down the arm. His sobs were then small and heart-wrenching, his pained squeal and whimper sounded faint in the now quiet room. His arm trembled as he clenched the part above the wound, squeezing even more blood out.

“…I… can’t live like this… I don’t want to live anymore… Nobody… Nobody needs me in this world.”

Suddenly, he felt numb. Numb and bitter. Suddenly he didn’t care that he was bleeding so much. His dead eyes then scanned around the room, searching for something that he could use to put an end to his misery. No one was there to stop him this time, he was free to go.

Something caught his attention. Instead of a dangerous item, it was a canvas on a wooden easel that was facing the wall by the window. It piqued his curiosity, a strange pull that tempted him to turn it around and see what was painted on it. Hyunwoo knew well that the owner of the body was incredibly talented, he had seen many of his past drawings in middle school.

_It should be okay to see a piece of art for the last time before I go._

So he got up and walked over to the canvas, leaving a trail of blood across the floor, and on the grey and white carpet.

The moment he turned the canvas around, a teary beautiful face flashed in his mind and a desperate voice echoed in his ears.

_“I know you’re a good person, you’ve saved me! Give me a chance to know you and I promise I’ll be your best friend! A friend who will never leave you... Please, don’t run away from me!”_

The icy cold heart began to melt, turning into warm water that leaked out through the soulless doe eyes.

“...Cha Jinhee.” Hyunwoo reached out to the painting, and traced a finger along the side of the pretty face looking back at him. “Why did you stop me?” He examined the details in the background; red, orange, and yellow strokes blended together, an abstract depiction of the autumn leaves. Then, he looked down to his right arm. Red.

“It can’t be true... that you’d be my friend and never leave me.” He pressed his hand on the wounded arm, coating his left palm in red. “In the end, everyone leaves.” Bringing the bloody palm to the canvas, he smacked a handprint right over the autumn colors. “You will be disappointing too, like others... like me. But for what you did...” He wiped more blood off with his palm, and smeared more on the canvas like a paint. “...I’ll let you have your way. Just this time... Try, and you can have all this blood as a reward for trying.”

Hyunwoo stopped and took his time admiring the extra touch he had added to the piece of art. A faint smile grew on the pale lips. Feeling himself slowly fade away, he took a seat on the edge of the bed, gazed at the painting for the last time, and sighed.

The tired eyes then dimmed down for a brief moment, until they suddenly popped open as wide as saucers.

“W-W-What— I-I’m bleeding!!”

Yoo Taejun, the system’s caretaker, was greeted by the horrific sight of blood everywhere; on his arm and his hands, on the floor, on the carpet, and on Jinhee’s birthday present.

A big, bloody _“Moon Hyunwoo”_ on the painting.

“Oh, no... Oh, no, we’re in trouble.”

Taejun rushed out and ran to the bathroom, locked the door, put a small towel between his teeth, and turned on the faucet, letting the water run down his forearm and wash all the blood off. He sank his teeth onto the towel and dug his nails around the wound, swallowing back his groans as the stinging pain intensified. He could see the open wound then. Tears began to fall again upon the sight of the red water pooling in the white sink, being washed down the drain. It was not the pain that made him cry.

_I’ve failed... I’ve failed to take care of everyone. I’ve let us get hurt._

The caretaker believed that he himself was the one to blame, for not being able to reach out to Hyunwoo and help him feel better, assuming that all this chaos was purely another outcome of the suicidal alter’s intentional self-harm. It couldn’t have been any other alters; Hyunwoo’s name was clearly painted there, and the others wouldn’t have come up with the sick idea of using the blood as a paint. None of them would have messed with Jinhee’s present, not _that_ way.

What he didn’t know was that it was _not_ intentional, and the painting of Jinhee had changed Hyunwoo’s mind... otherwise, he wouldn’t have lived longer to see the sun.

Taejun wouldn’t stop crying; he treated the wound and put on a bandage while crying, swept the pieces of glass and scrubbed the blood off the carpet while crying, and stared at the red stain he couldn’t remove while crying. He went down to the kitchen, cooked some food, and fed the starving body, all the while his endless tears continued to fall in the suffocating silence. He went back to the bathroom and carefully washed the sweaty, sticky body, and until he was back sitting on the edge of his bed, looking at the blood-stained painting, his quiet sobs had yet to subside.

“I’m sorry… I’m sorry I can’t fix it.”

The caretaker took a paper and a pen, and proceeded to write a message for the next alter who would come out.

_“We’ve got injured, but I don’t know how it happened... I’ve tried my best to clean up the mess. Please don’t open the bandage, the wound has just stopped bleeding. It’s a pretty big wound... but I guess it will be okay without stitches. Don’t worry too much about it, just give it some time to heal. About the painting... I don’t know how to fix it, I can’t paint... I’m so sorry. Let’s not get upset about it... okay? At least there’s no blood on the face. We still have enough time until Jinhee’s birthday._

_Let’s hang on together._

_-Yoo Taejun-_

_2013/10/05_

_11:55 PM”_

He turned off the lights, lay down facing the painting, pulled the blanket up to his chin, and placed the note next to the pillow. A shaky breath left the parted lips as the dissociation began to hit harder, his presence weakening in the state of consciousness, another presence getting stronger. He let his blank gaze fall on empty space. The last drop of tear slipped down and seeped into the soft fabric of the pillow.

Just a moment later, the glint of life returned to the doe eyes. The first thing they could discern in the dark was the paper laid on the bed. Getting up slowly, the boy switched the bedside lamp on and read the note. Then he looked around – the clock that showed _12:06 AM,_ the broken mirror, and the painting that was then placed next to the bed, not in the corner facing the wall, where it was supposed to be. Finally, he lifted his wounded arm and examined the bandage under the yellow light.

For some reasons, he was tempted to poke around the wound, so he did exactly that.

“Ack— Ow!” He hissed. Mentally cursing at himself, he slid off his bed and went to turn all the lights on. The sight of the blood stain on the carpet and the painting made him turn the lights back off immediately.

“...Damn it.” He sighed. Who was he kidding? Turning the lights off and pretending he hadn’t seen anything wouldn’t change the fact that he had some mess to clean up too. It wouldn’t magically disappear on its own in the morning.

So, once again the lights were on, and this time they were left on until the next several hours. The teen spread out his collection of paints on the floor and proceeded to get his hands dirty, despite feeling super exhausted for a reason he didn’t even know. It could be his only chance to fix the birthday present before it was too late.

The young artist Wooshin continued to work and pour his heart out on his art until the sunlight peeked in behind the curtains, warm yellow on the edges of the window. By the time he fell asleep like a dead log, the painting had been fixed, even finished flawlessly after many overlays of paints, safe and secure, hidden behind the wardrobe.

Wooseok’s uncle didn’t return home until much later that day, in the evening. He came back just to leave again with a suitcase.

This was, to Wooseok, a precious glimmer of hope.

_Stay away as long as you can... so I can see Jinhee at her birthday party._

_—_

“Ah, shouldn’t we hold the party somewhere near his house? So if he needs to go home, he can get there quickly. I guess I know a good restaurant there, it’s pretty affordable and they have some really delicious food!”

Seungyoun and Yeonwoo exchanged a meaningful gaze while their dear friend went on and on with the ideas that she was listing down so passionately on a piece of paper. So typical of Cha Jinhee; displaying absolute zero interest in her own birthday party, but totally going all out for someone else’s birthday surprise, even though it was still her birthday that day.

“So, since October 27th is on Sunday, there’s a good chance that this plan can go smoothly. We just need to come up with a good excuse so his uncle will let him go! A group project or something—“

Jinhee cut her words abruptly as soon as the very subject of their discussion showed up at the door. She swiftly slipped her note into her book and watched the boy walk in, her eyes round and full of anticipation. There was a big white tote bag in his hand. As far as she could remember, they didn’t have any projects due that day, or even that week. It couldn’t be an art homework in that bag, could it?

Bursting her bubble, he put it down next to his desk instead of handing it over to anyone.

“...Happy birthday, Jinhee.”

A genuine happy smile bloomed on Jinhee’s face nonetheless.

“Thank you, Wooseok!” The sight of the dimples that Wooseok hadn’t seen in a while made him gulp nervously. He couldn’t tear his eyes off of her smile. “I’m glad you remember.”

“O-Of course.” Wooseok took a seat, avoiding eye contact at all cost.

“Wooseokie! Can you come tonight?” Seungyoun asked.

“...Huh?” The fact that he didn’t know what Seungyoun was talking about was enough to upset Wooseok a little. Come where? Why didn’t he know that there was somewhere to come to that night? He could’ve missed something really important.

“Haven’t you told him?” Yeonwoo raised an eyebrow at Seungyoun, who then slapped his own forehead. Meanwhile, the birthday girl herself seemed to have no clue of what the plan was.

“Ah... Right, I was going to tell him yesterday, but I totally forgot! I’m so sorry, I thought I had told him.” Seungyoun jutted out his bottom lip and gave a sad puppy look to the other three. Then he proceeded to explain, “Since it’s Jinhee’s birthday, we thought we should at least spend a little time together today, although we still have school tomorrow. We’re still going to have a better celebration this Saturday, but today should be special too! Jinhee has agreed to spare some time after the self-study period later. She has left everything to us, so she doesn’t know what we will do yet... But I’ll say this now, we’re going to hang out at my place! Yay!”

The couple beamed and clapped their hands, while Jinhee and Wooseok seemed a little lost.

“Why Seungyounie’s place, you might ask?” Yeonwoo read their thoughts out loud. “Because! First, it’s the nearest place from here, second, we can do whatever we want there since his mom will be away on an event until much later tonight, and last but not least, his mom is preparing some food for us right now! Heavenly home food by the best home cook! Yay!”

The couple cheered once again.

“Ah...” Jinhee was stunned. “That’s so nice of your mom, Seungyounie. Thank you so much. Ah, I need to thank her in person...”

“Don’t feel bad about it, it’s really nothing to her! She loves cooking.” Seungyoun grinned, happy that he and his mom got to be involved in making someone’s day.

“So, is Wooseokie coming with us?” Yeonwoo asked.

Wooseok bowed his head and glanced at the white bag by his desk. “I... M-My uncle is away. Business trip.”

The unexpected answer got the other three teenagers to gasp in pure shock. They hadn’t expected to get an answer that was not a “no” _that_ soon. Jinhee had even mentally prepared herself to let the day pass without Wooseok there among her friends.

“That means you’re coming??” Seungyoun left his seat and crouched down by Wooseok’s, to get a clear view of his uneasy face. “You are??”

_I really want to... but... do you want me there?_

Wooseok mustered up all his courage to lift his chin and look at his chairmate in the eyes, because for once, he _really_ needed an answer from her. How much she wanted it, how much she needed him to be there – if it wasn’t _that_ much, to him, it would mean that his presence wasn’t needed after all. She would be just fine celebrating her birthday with the others.

But that was not the case. Even though no words were uttered, her longing gaze was enough to convince him; she really, _really_ needed him to complete the special day.

“I... I’m... I guess I’m coming.”

Seungyoun shot up from his squatting position and his victorious yell exploded like a firework, shocking the whole sleepy class, Yeonwoo cheered and started a silly dance with her boyfriend, and Jinhee was at a loss of words, covering her gaping mouth with her hands, now struggling not to shed happy tears.

“T...Thank you.” Those tears escaped anyway as soon as she let her voice out. Wooseok panicked and shifted around in his seat, holding his hands back from reaching out to wipe those tears away. Jinhee chuckled and wiped them herself. “Sorry, I shouldn’t be crying.”

Needless to say, they were all super excited for that night. Yeonwoo and Seungyoun got busy elaborating their plans, once in a while peeking and typing on their phones sneakily during the classes, and so did Hangyul, in his seat at the back. They had a fun surprise in store.

While they were busy planning, Wooseok couldn’t stop worrying about things; about how awkward it would be to spend time with people he had been avoiding, about what would happen if he let himself open up, about the best timing to give the present to Jinhee, and about the present itself, if it was even okay to give a painting that had his blood on it, although it wasn’t visible anymore, whether he should be honest and tell Jinhee about it or just say nothing and keep it a secret forever. Jinhee would have a bloody painting displayed in her house and she wouldn’t even have a clue about it.

Wooseok could’ve sworn that he had tried his best. He had another similar painting back in his room, a new one that he had painted after having found out about the bloody incident from Taejun and Wooshin’s notes. For some reasons, maybe due to his frustration and exhaustion, he just couldn’t make it as perfect as the original piece.

So that was he had brought in the white tote bag; the perfect bloody painting.

But he didn’t want to give it to her just yet. Secretly wishing in his heart all the time, he hoped for a chance when he could show it to her in private and tell her the truth. She might feel disgusted, or freak out, or even reject the gift, but at least there would be no creepy secret that she didn’t know about it.

On top of it all, the biggest trouble was none other than his uncle’s men. Wooseok needed help in order not to get recognized by those _spies_ on the way to Seungyoun’s place.

At the moment, there was only one person he could ask for help.

The cleaning period came, Wooseok got busy collecting the trash. Nearby, Seungyoun was happily sweeping the floor while humming a cheerful song.

Wooseok looked around to make sure there was no one within earshot, before clearing his throat to get the other boy’s attention.

“S...Seungyounie.”

The called boy whipped around at that instant with the brightest beam on his face. “Yes, Seokie? Do you need anything? Oh, is it that trash bag? Is it heavy? I can carry it for you.”

“N-No, it’s not that...”

Sensing the urgency, Seungyoun came closer to the smaller boy and said in concern, “Tell me anything, Seokie.”

Wooseok gulped down his worries and looked into the taller’s eyes. “Don’t tell anyone, but... It’s... I have a... _babysitter_ problem. Someone is keeping an eye on me. They’ll tell my uncle if they see me go with the others to your place. I think... I think I need a cover.”

Seungyoun didn’t fail to catch the fishy part. “Is someone following you around? Who is it?” He turned his head side to side, checking their surroundings, just in case.

“A _babysitter._ They’re not here right now. Can you... help me?” Wooseok asked, not knowing that he would totally regret this several hours later.

8:15 PM. A group of four students walked through the school’s gate together. Two girls, two boys; one boy wearing an oversized black hoodie and a beanie. They managed to pass the two spies in disguise across the street without catching the tiniest bit of their attention.

If one didn’t look closely enough, they wouldn’t notice that something was off – the boy in a black hoodie was not even a boy, and one of the girls was not even a girl.

Wooseok and Yeonwoo had exchanged their uniforms.

Initially, Seungyoun had suggested Wooseok to exchange clothes with Jinhee instead, with a reason of entertainment purposes so that she wouldn’t be suspicious. And yet, since they noticed that Jinhee’s uniform would be a little too short on him, Yeonwoo was more than willing to lend hers. Anything for the success of their plan. As the cherry on top, Seungyoun had borrowed a wig from one of his many friends, who had had a theater class that day. A long, dark brown wig, adorably styled in two low pigtails, with cute bangs that perfectly matched Wooseok’s small face.

Jinhee, Seungyoun, and Yeonwoo were stifling their laughters along the way, while Wooseok couldn’t stop questioning his decisions in life.

_At least you’re smiling..._ He glanced at Jinhee, her contagious smile transferring to his own lips. _Walking with you again feels so nice._

“Did you see that dude near the toilet? His face when he saw Wooseokie was priceless!” Yeonwoo laughed and clapped her hands, totally satisfied with the situation. “He must’ve thought, ‘Whoa, who is this goddess passing by? I’ve never seen her before... Whoa, this school has an angel.’ Hilarious!”

The three of them laughed out loud, and eventually, Wooseok started to let out quiet giggles.

“Oh, look, Seokie is laughing too!” Seungyoun fished out his phone and snapped a photo of Wooseok and his bashful smile. The wig and the uniform’s bow tie made him look exceptionally adorable. “Ah, so cute. No wonder if guys like Seokie too!” he said jokingly and elbowed his girlfriend, who looked quite manly in his hoodie and beanie. “Don’t you think so, bro?”

“For sure, bro!” Yeonwoo cackled and had a fist bump with Seungyoun.

“But for real, though,” Jinhee said between her giggles, “Yeonwoo resembles Seungwoo oppa even more if she hides her hair like this!”

“Cha Jinny! Give your oppa a hug!” Yeonwoo mimicked her brother and attacked Jinhee with a bear hug.

They didn’t stop joking and laughing all the way, but Wooseok fell silent at one point, as he felt himself dissociating.

“Wooseok... Is something wrong?” Jinhee was the first to notice.

“Ah...” Wooseok shook his head and rubbed his eye. “Someone is close.”

_It’s Wooshin._ He didn’t want Jinhee to know that it was Wooshin who was close to the front. He was afraid he might get hurt if she seemed just a _little_ excited by the mention of this alter. Yes, he’d get jealous of his own alter.

_Let me stay... Please let me have this night. I really need this._

As he fought back the switching, he felt a warm hand shyly holding his pinky finger.

“Wooseok... Wooseokie, please stay.”

Jinhee’s sheepish plea was all it took to pull Wooseok back to full alertness. His heart didn’t stop racing until they entered a tall apartment building and went up to the eleventh floor.

Seungyoun led them to the door at the far end of the corridor. “Get ready...” He entered the password, opened the door, and the lights inside were switched on right away.

“SURPRISE!!”

Jinhee gasped out of shock as five boys jumped out of their hiding spots, popping confetti and blowing party horns. There were Hangyul and Yohan, and even Junho and his friends, Hyeongjun and Eunsang. On the wall were pink, purple, and white balloons in shape of hearts and letters, _“HBD JINNY”,_ and on the coffee table was a chocolate cake with eighteen candles that were flaming like a torch. Many kinds of food were spread out on the kitchen island, definitely enough for nine growing teenagers.

After cackling like mad hyenas at Wooseok’s cosplay, the boys – including Yeonwoo – ushered the flustered birthday girl to her cake and began to sing happy birthday to her. Seungyoun pulled the flushed-faced Wooseok along and hyped him up to break loose and sing loudly with the others.

“L-Let me get changed first,” Wooseok whispered.

“Why? You look pretty! You’ll miss the party and the cake if you get changed now!” Seungyoun laughed.

Wooseok sighed. _I knew it... I knew it was a bad idea, but I should’ve known it would be this bad._

Only after taking off his wig and tossing it to the sofa did he start to sing and clap with the others. _Screw my image, it’s been ruined since forever already._

He smiled.

In the little moment of warmth and joy, his soft gaze met Jinhee’s twinkling eyes, and their smiles grew bigger.

“Make a wish! Make a wish!” The boys chanted.

“Ahh, so sudden...” Chuckling, Jinhee gazed at the blazing flame, its light reflected in her clear brown eyes. In all honesty, she thought there were too many things that she could wish for, so many that she couldn’t put them in just a few sentence... and yet, most of them were not even about herself.

Sighing softly, she closed her eyes, put her hands together, and uttered her simplest, sincerest wish in her heart.

_I wish for a happy future, for both me and Wooseokie... and everyone here._

Jinhee opened her eyes, and before blowing the candles, laughed because she knew it was going to be a tough task.

“Blow the candles! Blow the candles!” Her friends hyped her up again.

“Remember, you have to blow all of them off if you want your wish to come true!” Seungyoun teased and cackled seeing Jinhee start to blow harder. He whispered to Wooseok, “Aren’t you curious what she wished for?”

_I am._ Wooseok only smiled to himself as the answer.

Everyone cheered as the last flame turned into a dancing puff of smoke. Jinhee huffed a big sigh of relief.

But then, Seungyoun grabbed a lighter and lit all the candles once again. Jinhee looked at him in disbelief.

“Hey, what are you doing? Even just watching her blow those candles was tiring!” Yohan sounded out the complaint for Jinhee.

“She’s about to throw hands,” Hangyul commented.

Before Jinhee could start whining, Seungyoun held his hands up, pleading guilty. “Hear me out first.” And after getting questioning looks from the others, he continued, “I had this birthday ritual that may seem strange to you guys. You see, when I was a kid and my dad was still alive, he used to come home late. He was a very busy man. My mom told me, whenever it was my birthday, I was always impatient! I kept asking her to let me blow the candles even when my dad wasn’t home yet. So we made a deal; I could blow the candles early, but when my dad came home, we still had to celebrate together and I could blow the candles once again, on one condition: I had to make a wish together with the most special person to me. So, either my mom or my dad. They actually did it for fun, to see which one of them whom I liked better, and because they were curious about what I really wanted. Let’s say, if I chose my dad, I would hold hands with him and whisper my wish to him, and he would whisper his wish to me. Then, we wished for both our wishes together, and blew the candles together. Every year, I found that my wishes that came true were those wishes that I had made together with my parents, while the wishes I made alone didn’t always come true. After realizing this, I stopped asking to blow the candles early, and I always waited for my dad to come home. After my dad passed away... even until now, my mom and I have always shared our wishes on our birthdays. You see, of course now I know those wishes came true because my parents made them come true, but somehow I also have this firm belief in my heart... that if two hearts unite and wish for the same thing together, it will be stronger than a wish of one heart. Would you... like to try this too, Jinhee?”

Jinhee had teared up at the mention of Seungyoun’s late father, who had passed away quite early in the boy’s teenage years. They knew how much he cherished the memories of his father. And to respect those memories, Jinhee agreed to try the said birthday ritual, despite being out of breath already.

“Next time let’s get normal candles if we want to celebrate here at Seungyounie’s place,” Jinhee joked to lift up the melancholic mood. Laughing, the others instantly nodded and agreed to the suggestion.

“His motive is the sweetest, though.” Yeonwoo defended her boyfriend, hugging him and giving him a smitten grin. “So who’s gonna blow the candles with Jinny? Let’s hurry before the fire eats the cake!”

“You’re free to choose, Jinhee,” Seungyoun said, “Just don’t pick Yeonwoo, it won’t be fun.” He stopped his mouth getting a playful glare from the said girl. “I-I mean, we know that you two are special to each other, so pick someone else today!”

Needless to say, everyone was expecting the same name, except for the owner of the name himself.

_It would be Seungyoun,_ Wooseok thought, _because they’re also close friends... Or maybe Yohan. Ah, no, of course it would be Junho._

Jinhee bowed her head and bit her bottom lip to restrain her shy, face-splitting grin.

“Um... W...Wooseok.”

Wooseok felt his heart drop to the floor like a heavy chunk of steel... or at least that was what it felt like to him. A mini heart attack. His hands were starting to sweat profusely, how was he going to hold hands with her? What was his wish anyway? What kind of wish should he tell her? Why wasn’t she panicking like he was? His anxiety skyrocketed as Seungyoun pushed him to stand next to Jinhee and everyone else went wild.

Despite looking perfectly calm on the outside, Jinhee’s heart was in no better condition. But she saw this as her only chance that might not come again; she was not to lose momentum, it was _now or never._

Dropping all her doubt and hesitation, Jinhee took Wooseok’s hand, gently pulled him closer, and brought her lips close to his ear.

“I only wish for a happy future... a happy life for everyone, for you and me,” she whispered, exhaling a shaky breath, “but above it all, I wish we could be happy together, like we were once. I wish someday I can have you back. I wish someday there will be no more fear and pain in your life, so we can be happy together.”

A teardrop fell down Wooseok’s cheek without permission, but nobody saw it. He turned his head hiding his face from the others, and took his turn to whisper his wish.

“I wish...” he gulped. “I wish for the same. But, most importantly... I wish you will never get hurt because of me.”

Jinhee couldn’t stop herself from wrapping her arms around Wooseok’s waist in a firm hug. “Kim Wooseok... As long as you don’t get hurt, I won’t get hurt too.” _But you always get hurt... Still, a wish is a wish._ “Let’s make these wishes come true.”

They broke the hug and turned to see that everyone was recording them with their phones. “Stop recording us!” Jinhee sniffled and laughed.

Hand in hand, with both their wishes in mind, Jinhee and Wooseok tried to blow all the candles together, going from shy, to annoyed, to frustrated, to a giggling mess until all the flames disappeared.

“Let’s take a picture together!” Seungyoun rushed to Wooseok’s side before he could walk away from Jinhee, and Yeonwoo came from the other side. They squished Jinhee and Wooseok together in the middle and called the others to join them, while Hangyul readily prepared his phone to take a group selfie.

_This is too well-planned._ Jinhee rolled her eyes and smiled to herself, having known the Yeon couple would’ve planned something like this for sure.

After countless snaps and silly poses, at last, the owner of the house let his guests touch the food.

“Yes!! Finally we can eat!” Hangyul was the happiest of them all.

Meanwhile, from the corner of his eye, Wooseok noticed that Yohan was zoning out. Right, Yohan had been trying exceptionally hard to look genuinely happy that night. There was nothing Wooseok could offer more than a soft touch on the shoulder and a warm genuine smile to comfort him. To Yohan, it was good enough of a peace offering. Having an unrequited love was enough, he didn’t need an enemy too.

Hyeongjun and Eunsang took out a neatly wrapped, box-shaped present that they had hidden behind the sofa and gave it to Jinhee, who then happily thanked them with a pinch on each of their cheeks. Yohan followed suit, giving her a small gift in a classy black and silver wrapping paper, telling her not to open it until she was home because even just the wrapper was enough to make her feel uneasy. Hangyul, who was just about to stuff some tteokbokki into his mouth, dejectedly put the food down and went to get the present he had brought as well. It wasn’t wrapped, as expected of Lee Hangyul. A cute baby pink t-shirt in a shopping bag right from the store. Jinhee was surprised she didn’t find the receipt in the bag. Seungyoun, Yeonwoo, and Junho had each given her a present early that morning, which left Wooseok as the only one who hadn’t given anything.

Despite no words being said, there was nobody in the room who didn’t notice the big white bag that Wooseok had been carrying around.

“Seungyounie... Can I get changed now?” Wooseok asked while the others flocked around the kitchen island.

“Is it uncomfortable wearing a skirt? Or too comfortable?” Seungyoun laughed, and then called his girlfriend. “Yeonie!”

“Yes, Younie?” the girl answered while taking out some more plates from the kitchen cabinet.

“Wooseokie needs his uniform back!” Seungyoun said.

“Aww, man, I was just starting to like wearing these pants. Alright, wait a sec!” Yeonwoo said before running to one of the bedrooms. She came out just two minutes later wearing her own clothes – a loose t-shirt and a pair of shorts.

“Does... Yeonwoo noona live here too?” Hyeongjun asked, looking dazed.

Yeonwoo laughed. “No, I’m just having a sleepover tonight! A sleepover, not sleeping with Younie. You babies, don’t think of silly things, alright?” She pointed at Junho, Hyeongjun, and Eungsang. “Ahh, what can I say? Seungyounie’s mom likes to have me around because I can take care of this place better than her son. Can you tell that I’ve got the golden ticket to be a part of this family?”

“You don’t even clean your own room,” Jinhee said, “it’s always messy whenever I come over.”

“I know, right??” Seungyoun added, “Why does she clean my place but doesn’t clean her own place? I don’t understand. Is this what people call temporary expression of love?”

“Shut up, my love isn’t temporary.” Chuckling, Yeonwoo led Wooseok to the bathroom so he could get changed there. She made sure the others’ attention had left them completely before poking her head into the bathroom and whispering to Wooseok, “Hey, isn’t that a present in your bag?”

Wooseok was caught off guard by the question. “Oh, um—y-yes.” He gulped.

“Why are you keeping it?” Yeonwoo asked, utterly curious. “You could’ve switched and missed the rest of the day not giving it to her.”

_Right..._ “M-My alters know about it... but I will give it soon. When the time is right.” Truth be told, he had no idea when the right time even was.

“Unless it’s a massive condom collection, I think anytime could be the right time,” Yeonwoo blurted. Wooseok choked on air. “Oh? Don’t tell me... Is it really? No, wait, don’t answer that. I’m keeping my mind squeaky clean.” Yeonwoo flashed an innocent grin. “Well, I’ll leave you to get changed in peace now. You _really_ should give it to her soon... I’ll see what we can do to help you out.”

“I-It’s not a...” Yeonwoo shut the door, leaving Wooseok’s words hanging. “...condom collection.”

Jinhee watched discreetly as Yeonwoo came back from the bathroom and whispered something to Seungyoun.

_They must have something else in store. These two clowns wouldn’t drop it here,_ she thought.

Soon, Wooseok came back and joined the others eating. Seeing that he was too shy to grab the food, both Seungyoun and Yeonwoo didn’t stop putting food in his bowl like a married couple feeding their beloved child. Yeonwoo wasn’t exaggetating when she said Seungyoun’s mom was the best home cook; every bite made Wooseok miss _home_ even more. Not his uncle’s home, not his parents’ home, since he barely had any memories of it, but Jinhee’s home. This dinner reminded him of the times when he had sat with her family and enjoyed some delicious meal together, when her parents had happily fed him piles of good food, just like what Seungyoun and Yeonwoo were doing at the moment. He had actually gained weight because of how well the family had taken care of him. Those times were the happiest times of his life.

“It’s been a while.” Hyeongjun’s shy remark scattered Wooseok’s thoughts away. “Been a while since the last time all nine of us sat and ate together at the school’s cafeteria... It’s really nice to have Wooseok hyung back with us.”

“Right, it feels complete with Wooseok hyung here,” Eunsang added.

The older teens cooed and patted their shy babies for pointing out their heartfelt, honest thought that surely represented everyone else’s there.

“See, Seokie? Even Hyeongjunie and Eunsangie missed you too,” Seungyoun said.

“I missed Wooseok hyung too.” Junho raised his hand. “I still keep the Squirtle plushie that Wooseokie hyung won and gave to me at Lotte World. I always sleep with it! Noona too, she has two foxes from hyung in her bed. Yeo and Eevee.”

Jinhee glared at her brother as a warning not to spill too much, while the others began to tease her and Wooseok about the plushies.

“She’d kiss the fox and pretend it’s Wooseok before she goes to bed,” Hangyul said. His playful, teasing whistle then made the others laugh and Jinhee turn pink in the face.

While being equally embarrassed, Wooseok had started to feel a little emotional as well from what the younger boys had said. He had terribly missed them too, on days when he had to eat alone at school, isolating himself so that no secrets would be spilled accidentally either by himself or his alters. He wanted to make them understand why he had been avoiding them, yet on the other hand, he knew that if he did so, it would be too hard for him not to spill _everything_ at once. He did not want _everyone_ to know all dark secrets kept in his uncle’s home.

“I’m sorry,” was all he could offer in response to the others’ complaints about his absence.

Sensing that the mood was going down due to the sad topic, Seungyoun and Yeonwoo looked at each other, before the former said, “Ahh, what’s with this blue mood? Everyone should be happy today! Anyways, since we still have some time, I’m gonna take you around this room for a quick apartment tour! Earlier these guys here rushed to this place right after school, I’m pretty sure they had arrived just five minutes before we did!” Seungyoun laughed.

“Exactly five minutes,” Hangyul said, “I even forgot the password to open the door.”

Seungyoun laughed even louder imagining his friends panicking outside his door. “Well, that means you guys haven’t looked around, right? It’ll be nice if you can get familiar to this place, so you can come and enjoy yourself here whenever there’s a chance. It’s open for you all! Except when it’s three in the morning, of course. Hehe, just kidding.”

And so, after cleaning up the dishes together, they went around to see the rooms and every corner of Seungyoun’s apartment; the living room, the kitchen and the dining room, the three bedrooms and the two bathrooms – one near the living room and one inside Seungyoun’s room. His room was the last one they checked out, and while they had been looking at the guest room, where Yeonwoo was staying, someone had been busy executing a secret plan.

Yeonwoo had moved Wooseok’s bags from the living room to Seungyoun’s room. His backpack and the birthday present, neatly placed in the corner, hidden behind a guitar.

“Why do you have the room with a bathroom inside? This could’ve been your mom’s room,” Yohan commented while they were in Seungyoun’s room. It was a very simple room of a teenage boy who clearly loved music and art; there werr a guitar and a collection of art supplies, as well as unique artworks displayed on the wall.

“Because my mom’s room is a bit more spacious and has a bigger built-in closet. She has more clothes than me!” Seungyoun said, secretly glancing and blinking at Yeonwoo as a code. “Ah, by the way, there’s something you need to see! I made these with Yeonwoo last week.”

Seungyoun opened his drawer and took out two tubes made of toilet paper rolls; one wrapped in a glittery blue paper, and the other one in orange, both decorated with adorable stickers.

“These are DIY kaleidoscopes!” Seungyoun said proudly. “There are angled reflective papers inside that act like mirrors. If you aim at something and look through this tube, you’ll see a cool pattern inside from the reflections of that thing! The pattern will change if you rotate the tube. Does anyone wanna try?”

“I want!” Junho raised his hand, then Hyeongjun and Eunsang followed suit.

“You can test on these patterns!” Seungyoun pointed at the row of framed colorful pattern papers on the wall above his desk.

“Whoa, so cool!” Junho said as he peeked through the kaleidoscope, aimed it at the patterns, and tried rotating the tube to see the pattern change. “Noona, you need to see this!”

Next to him, Hyeongjun gave the orange kaleidoscope to Eunsang, and after trying it, the latter handed it to Wooseok.

“Try it, hyung,” Eunsang said softly with his sweet smile. “It’s really cool.”

Curious, Wooseok decided to take it and give it a try, while Jinhee took the one from her brother.

“Oh... How pretty!” Jinhee was easily entertained by the handmade toy.

While she and Wooseok were busy getting distracted, at the back, Yeonwoo was secretly ushering all the boys out of the room, signaling them to be as quiet as possible. None of the two realized they were being left alone in the room until they finally heard the door being shut. Surprised, Jinhee and Wooseok turned to see that everyone was gone.

“...What just happened?” Jinhee made her way to the door, sensing Seungyoun and Yeonwoo’s clownery, while Wooseok froze up wide-eyed like a statue.

Hearing the sound of the door being locked, Jinhee panicked and started to pound her fist on the door.

“Aish, Cho Seungyoun! Han Yeonwoo! Open the door, this is not funny! We still have school tomorrow! Hey, stop laughing!” Her eye twitched out of annoyance hearing the snickers and giggles on the other side of the door. She hit the door harder each word she emphasized, “What. Do. You. Expect. To. Happeeeennn??”

“Kiss!” Hangyul’s faint voice came. “Romantic scene! Not erotic, there are under-eighteen audience!”

A sigh of defeat left Jinhee’s lips as the giggles grew even louder into full laughters.

Yeonwoo’s voice was then heard close to the door. “We know you two need a private moment to sort things out, so we’ll be nice enough to let you have it and wait out here! Aren’t we the sweetest friends? This door will stay locked for at least half an hour, please use the chance to clear unresolved problems as well! And no, we won’t eavesdrop, your privacy is guaranteed! Good luck!”

_The sweetest indeed._ Jinhee sighed once again.

Just then did Wooseok notice something familiar; his bags. Someone had moved his backpack and the present to the corner of Seungyoun’s room. He understood then. That was how Yeonwoo was trying to _help him out._

He was also aware now that this was exactly what he had been wishing for all day; a chance to show Jinhee the painting in private and tell her the truth. But this wasn’t exactly the kind of _private_ that he had expected.

_I should be more careful with my wishes next time,_ he took a mental note and sighed. _So... This is it... It’s now or never._

Heaving a deep, nervous breath, Wooseok cleared his throat and called, “Jin... Jinhee.”

Jinhee tensed up, taken by surprise. _Eh...? He’s really talking to me first?! W-What’s going to happen now? Should I really expect something to happen? Aish, there’s... there’s nothing to expect!_

“Um... Yes?”

Jinhee turned around and eyed the other while he took the white bag that had been making her curious all day.

The moment he revealed what was inside, though, she was completely blown away.

“Oh... Oh my God.”

It was a painting of her standing in an autumn park at night, holding a transparent umbrella, surrounded by the vibrant red, orange, and yellow trees. From the angle of her upper body that was slightly turned to the side, her head that was facing forward, and the innocent, questioning expression she made – round clear eyes and slightly parted lips, it appeared as if someone had called her from behind while she had been walking. Her smooth, untied hair was blown by a soft breeze, and the white fluffy cardigan she wore represented the cool air of the season, its bright color contrasting to the darker shades around it in a way that almost made her shine. The background itself wasn’t just abstract blends and clashes of autumn colors anymore, like Wooseok had initially made, but instead some intricately-shaped trees and leaves that Wooshin had painted using his fingers all night and dawn. There were shining lamp posts between the trees, their round lights beautifully reflected on the wet pathway. Faint, thin strokes of white indicated that it was lightly drizzling, perhaps after a heavier rain, seeing that the pavement was entirely wet.

“This... Um... This is a scene from my dream,” Wooseok explained sheepishly. “I dreamt of a night walk in a park... together with you. I called you, and you turned to me. P-Please have this, as your present... Happy birthday once again.”

Jinhee took the canvas and admired it with her glistening eyes. Just from the little details, she knew how much time and effort he had given to finish it... although she hadn’t discovered the incident behind it yet.

The guilt began to stir in Wooseok’s chest. _Tell her the truth now... Tell her._ His mouth remained shut, wouldn’t oblige.

“I... I didn’t think you’d still do this much for me.” Jinhee laid the painting down on Seungyoun’s bed like it was a baby, and stepped closer to the restless boy. “Thank you so much... Wooseokie.”

Wooseok thought he didn’t deserve it when he was held close in such a loving hug, when she leaned her head on his shoulder, when she caressed his back – could he receive all this affection when he had so much kept under wraps? Not only about the painting, but also about his uncle, the dirty business, the men spying them around... He felt like he wasn’t being fair in this.

Nonetheless, some secrets just couldn’t be kept forever; they were bound to be discovered, one way or another.

“I’ll always be waiting for the day when our wishes will come true. After today... can we stop acting like strangers?”

As Jinhee took a step back and looked into Wooseok’s eyes, her hands got a firm grip on his forearms... and one of them landed _right_ on his hidden wound.

“Ah!!” Wooseok yelped and held his arm, hissing and wincing in pain, while Jinhee gasped and retracted her hands back as if she had just touched boiling water.

“I-I’m sorry! I’m sorry!” She instantly apologized without even knowing why the other was hurting. “W...What’s wrong?? Was I too harsh?”

Wooseok shook his head and blinked back the water pooling in his eyes. _I really need to say it now..._

“It’s...” Slowly and hesitantly, he rolled up the right sleeve of his shirt, revealing a loose bandage with a long, yellowish brown stain along the middle part, which looked like it hadn’t been changed for days.

Jinhee became still. The emotions that the sight had provoked inside her was too complicated that she was unable to display any of them for a brief moment...

Until fresh tears fell in silence.

“Oh—“ Wooseok was taken aback when suddenly Jinhee turned and went back on banging the door once again.

“Cho Seungyoun! Han Yeonwoo! We need a first aid kit! Do you guys hear me?? Come bring us a first aid kit!”

Loud footsteps rushed from the living room.

“Wait, it could be just a trick to let them out!” Seungyoun’s loud whisper was heard before he asked, “What do you need it for?”

Jinhee rolled her eyes. “I’m not joking right now. Wooseok has a bad wound and his bandage needs to be changed! Do you need a proof? I’ll give you a proof.”

Jinhee grabbed her phone out of her skirt’s pocket, quickly took a photo of Wooseok’s arm, and sent the picture to their group chat. Multiple notification sounds rang outside the room.

“Oh my gosh—Wait, I’ll go get the first aid kit!” Seungyoun yelled in panic. The other boys came to the door out of concern.

“Wooseok hyung, are you okay?” Junho asked from the other side.

“Y-Yes, I’m okay,” Wooseok answered, loud enough for the others to hear.

“What happened? How did you get the wound?” Yohan asked.

Jinhee looked at Wooseok, also waiting for an answer.

“I... I don’t know, but the mirror in my room is broken.” Wooseok’s face was starting to lose its color. He felt cornered. He did _not_ want to tell the story to _everyone_ , because even telling Jinhee alone was already too hard.

The door was unlocked, Seungyoun slipped in, and six other heads peeked over his shoulders.

“Seokie, are you okay??” Seungyoun looked horrified, slightly panting after running about. He handed over a light blue box to Jinhee and said, “There are more in my bathroom, use everything you can find in there! D-Do you need a help? Should I help? Should anyone help?”

“Thanks, I can handle this,” Jinhee said. “You wanted to give us some time alone, didn’t you? We’ll have the time, please.”

“Ooo. That sounds kinda sexy,” Hangyul muttered at the back. The other boys gave him a weird look.

“Okay, everyone get back to the living room! Door locked, no eavesdropping!” Yeonwoo clapped her hands and commanded the boys to move like a group of sheep. “Take all the time you need, lovebirds!”

Once again, Jinhee and Wooseok were left alone in the locked room. Jinhee took Wooseok to the bathroom inside, washed her hands thoroughly, put on a pair of gloves from the first aid box, and proceeded to unwrap the dirty bandage carefully. A long cut was revealed, hadn’t fully closed, the crimson red still wet and glossy. It was also Wooseok’s first time seeing the wound. Just then did he understand why it hurt so bad, especially in the shower.

“I’m going to clean your wound now... It’s going to sting a little, prepare yourself, okay? I’ll be gentle.” Jinhee looked around and found some clean washcloths under the sink. “Trust me, you know my dad is a doctor.”

Wooseok’s nostrils flared as he inhaled and exhaled deeply to calm himself down, bracing himself for the agony. It was not going to sting _a little_ , he knew better than that.

Holding Wooseok’s arm still by the wrist, Jinhee cleaned the cut so tenderly using the cloth, warm water, and soap, while trying to distract his attention from the pain by asking him questions.

“When did you get this cut?” she asked, gently dabbing on the wound.

“A-Around five days ago—ahh,” Wooseok winced and whimpered. “J-Jinhee, it—it stings...”

“Which alter was out that time?” Jinhee asked again.

“F-From Wooshin’s note...” Wooseok teared up. “It was H-Hyunwoo. Moon Hyunwoo... He’s back.”

“Oh... I know.” Jinhee smiled bitterly as she rinsed Wooseok’s wound with water. “I met him around the beginning of last month.”

_The color_ drained from Wooseok face. “...You did?”

Jinhee nodded. “He pulled a stunt... But you don’t have to worry about it. Hyunjin came out shortly after.”

Wooseok wanted to cry. There was too much that he didn’t know, it frustrated him.

“Please tell me what happened,” he said.

“Well...” Jinhee patted the skinny arm dry. “Whether you know what happened or not, nothing can change what happened in the past. No harm was done that day, so it’s okay. But this wound... it’s still here, and it makes me wonder... Was it intentional, or an accident? It _could_ be an accident, don’t you think so?”

_No matter what they say, Moon Hyunwoo is not a bad person._

Those words had made Jinhee lose sleep for nights, to reflect on her ways of perceiving things, perceiving people; perhaps her ways had been wrong. Prior to that day, she had never encountered Hyunwoo in person. Her knowledge of him had been obtained only from the mere stories told by Wooseok and his alters, Wooshin and Doyeon. And yet, even at the very first encounter, her mind had been set to think, “ _Oh, no, it’s Moon Hyunwoo, he’s going to do something bad to the body for sure.”_

Even though it had been proven true, when he had tried to get himself run over by a car, now Jinhee believed it couldn’t always be the case. He couldn’t always be trying to hurt himself all the time. After pondering Hyunwoo’s statement and good deed for nights, she would say, _there must be more to him than meets the eye._

“Wooshin thought... it was intentional,” Wooseok said.

“Why did he think so?” Jinhee asked. She led the other out of the bathroom and made him sit on the edge of the bed while she searched through the supplies in the first aid box.

Wooseok found no more ways to escape. _I can’t hide it anymore..._ “Because...” _Hyunwoo smeared the blood on the painting._ “...because...”

Jinhee couldn’t see why Wooseok was struggling so much to answer such a simple question. His breath was shaking and his red eyes were brimming with tears, she wasn’t sure whether it was because of the question or the sting from the ointment she was applying to his wound.

“Wooseokie... What makes you so afraid?”

The tender voice, the delicate touch, the affectionate gaze broke Wooseok down to crumbles. He started to cry. Little whimpers slipped between his sniffles while Jinhee wrapped a fresh, clean bandage around his arm.

“He... Hyunwoo... He ruined the painting. He smeared blood on the painting... He wrote his name on it with my blood... I’m s-sorry!” He choked out a sob. “I’m so sorry... I shouldn’t have given that painting to you. W-Wooshin fixed it, but still I thought it was disgusting, I tried to paint a new one but I couldn’t get it right—“

Wooseok’s stuttered explanation was cut and his breath hitched once Jinhee placed her hand on his cheek and cupped his face. He cried harder out of surprise, having thought that she would slap him instead.

“No... I still love it as much.”

Jinhee pulled the sobbing boy close and held him tight, letting him cry on her shoulder, not minding the wet trails on her own cheeks. She didn’t understand, how could he be _that_ afraid of telling _her_ the truth? It was only her, Cha Jinhee, who had discovered many dark secrets in his life... who would never even think of rejecting such a beautiful piece of art just because there was the hidden blood of the beautiful painter on it, which was there due to something he couldn’t have prevented. It wasn’t like he had murdered someone and painted using the victim’s blood. That would’ve been a whole different case.

She pointed out all of these thoughts, and just then, Wooseok’s sobs relented.

“I’m sorry...” Wooseok murmured, sinking in the comfort and drowsiness from the constant soothing strokes through his locks.

He couldn’t be relieved just yet. There were still too many things to be unveiled, when he wasn’t even sure if they should ever be unveiled. But Doyeon’s words from that evening kept coming back, challenging him to step even further then that he had finally let his guard down.

_“If you keep going on like this, you’ll be stuck in that maze forever... Try to have trust... They’ll find ways to protect you and themselves... Jinhee, you have not only her, but also her family... Let them come in and take you out...”_

Wooseok didn’t want to be stuck in that maze forever. Not only that he was on his own to survive, but also there was a monster hunting him down in there, always wanting to eat him. There wasn’t a day when he didn’t summon the memories of his happier days as the last strings of his strength, when he had once escaped, and life had been perfect in the safety and comfort of his new shelter; Jinhee’s home and family.

And right at this very moment, as if the universe had at last had mercy on him, he got to feel just a tiny pinch of those days’ comfort in his love’s arms. He found himself torn between being selfish enough to let her into his dark maze, and keeping himself shackled by the fear of putting his loved ones in danger.

However, Kim Wooseok was never a selfish person... Therefore, he chose the latter.

But Jinhee was persistent, consistent with her goal. She needed him to open up more in order to make her own way in and get him out of there.

“Wooseokie... Would you tell me something?” she asked.

Contrary to his escalating vigilance, Wooseok tightened his hold around Jinhee’s waist, rather possessively, not wanting to let go just yet.

“What... is it?” he asked.

Jinhee sorted her words carefully. “You see, we parted so suddenly... We had—We had something going on, didn’t we? Or was it just me?”

Wooseok’s heart broke a little. “No, it wasn’t just you...” _It really wasn’t._

“But then,” Jinhee continued, “we became like total strangers. I couldn’t understand... I can’t understand why.” Her voice cracked, and she bit her lip, fighting back the hot tears stinging in her eyes. “If it... if it really wasn’t just me, if you had the same feelings, how... how could you go on this way? How can you live day by day acting like it doesn’t hurt? Does it hurt you?”

For the nth time that day, once again Wooseok started to cry.

“...It does.”

Jinhee couldn’t hold it back no more, the honest answer really pierced her. “Then why do you keep hurting yourself?” She clutched the back of Wooseok’s uniform vest, her tears falling on his shoulder. “What makes you so afraid? What’s the worst thing that could happen even if you open up too much? What are we fighting against, is it beyond human? I’m not dense—I’m not blind, Wooseok. When I found out your uncle had taken your phone, I knew he had discovered something about us. He knows we had something, he knows you stayed at my place because he followed us that night, so that means he knows where I live, and maybe he’s sick enough to threaten you using me, so what? Do you really think that scares me? I know there are people watching over you, they need a better disguise and a better hiding spot, honestly. They always stand across the gate ptetending like they’re waiting for a ride or talking on the phone, then when you come out, they tail you until you reach home. That’s exactly why you borrowed Yeonwoo’s uniform earlier, although Seungyoun said it was for entertainment purposes, right? Those guys were there again today. What, are you surprised that I know about this? I’ve told you... I’m not blind. We live close to each other. I find them creepy, sure, but what are they gonna do? These guys, and your uncle, and let’s say there are more of them, are they some kind of invincible beings to fear so much? Are they not humans? It may seem impossible to win against them in your perspective, because you’ve been fighting alone... But open your eyes, there are many people who care about you. It’s not only me who’s ready to help you out.”

_Try to have trust on them, Wooseokie, they’ll find ways to protect you and themselves... When I come back someday, I hope I’ll see that you’ve been set free... Otherwise, I’ll be there with the others to fight for you._

Both Jinhee and Doyeon’s words swirled in Wooseok’s head. His chest was full and he felt suffocated. He wanted to be saved, he _needed_ them to save him so desperately. But he was scared. It was true, that their enemies were just humans, but he was _scared_. The human he was facing had broken him to the core. Out of nowhere, sudden horrifying flashbacks attacked him and took over his senses.

Not until Jinhee broke the hug and cupped his face did Wooseok realize that he was hyperventilating. His pupils were shaking and his chest was rising and falling violently to his ragged breathing. He found his hands tightly gripping the sides of Jinhee’s vest.

“...Calm down... Wooseok, please calm down.” Her soft voice gradually seeped in and became clearer in his ears. His heavy panting softened as he blinked his wide watery eyes at her woeful face.

“I’m sorry.” She sighed, dropping her hands.

“N...No. Jinhee...” Wooseok held the smaller hands in fear. _Please don’t give up on me..._

“I’m... I’m not ever giving up on you,” Jinhee said, making Wooseok wonder if he had said his thought out loud. “But I’ll try to be... gentle with you, I guess, when it comes to this... Because you’re the one who goes through it, and I don’t know what has been happening to you. I should’ve been more careful. Sometimes I wonder... Am I handling this right? Am I even helping you? How did Son Doyeon do it back then? Maybe she was more helpful... It’s unfortunate that she didn’t get to stay longer.”

The mention of his first love’s name caused guilt to stir in Wooseok’s chest. He was brought back to their last rendezvous, before she had left two months ago.

The kiss.

Wooseok hadn’t been able to stop thinking about it, even after weeks later. Something as simple as a light kiss on the cheek had created a sense of guilt that was equal to that of cheating on a spouse. He needed to let it out.

“J-Jinhee... There’s something... I need to tell.” Wooseok let go of the other’s hands and fidgeted with the hem of his vest.

Jinhee brightened up instantly, assuming that Wooseok was finally going to open up. “Ah, really? I’m... I’m all ears, then.”

“It’s... um...” Wooseok heaved a deep breath. “I-I had met Doyeon before she left.”

Jinhee’s smile faltered at the slightest. “Oh... Oh, well, that’s good to hear! I actually felt sorry when I first met her because you weren’t there. Ah, you must’ve been really happy when you saw her... It’s been years, right? So... Did you two catch up a lot?”

Wooseok nodded. “But it didn’t last long... Only half an hour, because it was after school and... I had to go home.” _I need to get straight to the point..._

“Oh, that’s too bad,” Jinhee said. “Did you at least give your number to her? Ah, had you had your new phone that time?”

At this point, Wooseok wasn’t even surprised anymore that Jinhee knew about his secret phone. Another reason for him to feel guiltier.

“I...” he gulped. “I did.”

The corner of Jinhee’s lips twitched indicating her annoyance. _So that’s how it is, huh... You could give your number to her and maybe keep in touch with her too, but couldn’t even let me know that you had a phone. Guess it’s clear who’s the special one here._

She kept smiling, though. A sweet smile that Wooseok found quite scary somehow.

“Hmm, I see.” Jinhee nodded and rubbed her chin. “That’s good... Pretty interesting. That way you can tell her anything, anytime, right.”

_Ah, I’m in trouble._ Wooseok mentally whined. It was too late, the bomb was going to explode anyway.

“T-There’s more. It’s...” He dropped his head and squeezed his eyes shut as he confessed the _sin,_ “Doyeon k-kissed my cheek!”

Five seconds, ten seconds, fifteen seconds passed, there was nothing but silence. Then, the bed shifted. Wooseok opened an eye to peek.

Jinhee had moved to the farthest corner of the bed and curled up into a sad ball.

“Ah... Oh, no, what do I do...” Wooseok panicked. “I-It was just a friendly kiss! A friendly kiss between friends!”

He crawled closer to Jinhee and sat next to her. “Jinhee...” He touched her arm. “I’m... I’m sorry.”

“How can you tell it was just a friendly kiss?” Jinhee mumbled behind her folded arms. “It could’ve been a romantic kiss to her. Were you the kind of friends who always kissed on the cheek? I should’ve known... She must’ve still had feelings for you.”

Right, Doyeon had never even kissed Wooseok before that day. That was why it had shocked him.

Wooseok scratched the back of his head, unable to answer. Then he thought, _Why would it matter if she really has feelings for me? She has left, and we don’t always talk... I was sad when she left, but now... time has proven that I can be okay without her, just like before she had come back._

_Right..._ “...It doesn’t matter.”

Confused, Jinhee raised her head, exposing her glistening puppy eyes, red nose, and pouty lips. The sight tugged at Wooseok’s heartstrings. “What do you mean it doesn’t matter?”

“Even if she has feelings for me...” Wooseok’s gaze softened. “It doesn’t matter.”

“Why?” Jinhee asked, thinking, _It’s so unlike you to say something like that._ Someone important to him _possibly_ had a crush on him, and he – Kim Wooseok, not any other alters of his – did _not_ care.

Wooseok thought, that day was either cursed or blessed. So much he had to reveal in such a short span of time, for better or worse. He’d be damned if he stopped midway and continued to live waiting for that chance to come again the second time.

He was going to get this off his chest.

Pulling himself closer to Jinhee, he took her hand shyly, and fondly gazed into her puzzled eyes.

“Because since that day, I’ve realized that, although I really liked Doyeonie...” He blinked, and a teardrop fell down his flushed cheek. “...now the only one I like is Cha Jinhee.”

Wooseok’s eyes fluttered closed as he leaned in and planted a soft, innocent kiss on Jinhee’s cheek. The sudden confession took her by surprise, so much that she couldn’t help but burst into tears.

She had just gotten the best birthday present she could ask for.

Or maybe it wasn’t the ultimate best yet... Upon the kiss, there was the strange pull between them again, this time much stronger than they had felt before. As they searched in each other’s eyes, they found the same want, the same longing, like they hadn’t had enough of each other yet.

Wooseok breathed out. There was fire ignited in him, coming alive together with the presence of his broken part, the thirstiest and most passionate part; _Wooshin_. He wasn’t there to push Wooseok out of the way and steal the moment, but instead like a co-pilot, he was to assist and navigate, making sure they progressed on the right track and didn’t stop there, so they could have the moment together, the three of them.

“It’s... not just that. Instead of saying _‘I like you’_...” Under Wooshin’s influence, Wooseok tucked Jinhee’s hair behind her ear, and cupped her reddening cheek in his warm hand. “It should be... _I love you._ ”

It started with a timid, experimental nudge, and a soft whimper was released as two pairs of lips were then sealed together in a chaste kiss. Relief washed over them upon the touch they had been craving, the fizz of excitement bubbling up in the pits of their stomachs, from the thrill of kissing in their friend’s bed while the others were still waiting for them outside. This was exactly what Hangyul had expected to happen. But they couldn’t care less. They paid no mind to the possibility of being eavesdropped, not to the risk of being busted any second, not even to the tears streaming down their faces as they kissed – all they cared about was the wall that they had just kicked down together.

After times of despair, being separated by that seemingly unbreakable wall, now it had been destroyed and they could see each other again... and between them, there was a ball of light that had been born out of love and and the new trust that Wooseok had decided to hold onto.

Yes, he was going to let her in and take him out, they were going to find their way out and make their wish come true together, and just as much as she wanted to protect him, he swore in his heart that he would protect her too with all his life... because to the broken boy, his miserable life meant nothing more than his precious love did, it was not worth fighting for if she didn’t exist in it.

Nonetheless, just like his endless worry about his blood-stained painting, now Wooseok believed that with his love by his side, someday he would look back to this day and think...

_I’ve been worrying for nothing._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> KISS SCENE YAY *pops confetti* This chapter was really tough to write :) I'm not sure how it affected you, honestly I'm not so satisfied with it (because it's so close to the peak and I want it to be SUPER emotional, sea of tears, but it's not emotional enough to me) but anyways, the ride is not over yet :) there should've been more parts included but you'll find them in the next chapter instead. Initially there was no part in which Jinhee encountered Hyunwoo and Hyunjin, it was an improvisation that went too long lol
> 
> Anyways, please wait for the next chapter! Wooseok's birthday will be included in it :D thank you so much for reading and leaving kudos!
> 
> P.S.: Wooseok's kiss scene in Twenty Twenty AHSJKDHJAFHDLJFHAGHNOOOOOO Lee Hyunjin is the cutest bye


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